Initials that belong together

Discord - Imagine a Place...

2015.05.15 20:14 jewbacabra Discord - Imagine a Place...

Imagine a Place... where you can belong to a school club, a gaming group, or a worldwide art community. Where just you and handful of friends can spend time together. A place that makes it easy to talk every day and hang out more often.

2009.10.12 22:21 linuxadmin: Expanding Linux SysAdmin knowledge

Expanding Linux SysAdmin knowledge

2012.03.14 11:19 nevon Programming Horror: Sharing the WTFs

Share strange or straight-up awful code.

2023.06.04 13:52 Darthkaja My (21m) gf (30f) of almost 2 years has the tendency to do lot's of stuff while keeping me waiting without telling me she's doing that so I'm waiting without knowing for how long.

My gf and I do ldr. For almost 2 years now. So usually, we sleep together on call and in the morning we wake up together.
Something she has a habit of doing, is that we're happily in a conversation in the morning when waking up, then saying "I have to go to the toilet" (shuts camera off and mutes, obviously) but then I don't hear from her for half an hour. Then I tell her like "sweetie, is everything alright?". And she then just simply opens her camera, sitting in the kitchen or living room while eating something and then just tells me "yeah I was watching something" while I'm just waiting in bed.
Another situation: we're studying together in videocall (mute). She then says "okay breaktime". So we start talking for like 10 minutes or something. She then gets called by someone else (which is okay). But after that call she just texts me "I'm gonna shower". I'm like, okay. But then she's gone for an hour. But in that hour, I see her online on insta while she didn't reply to me on whatsapp. So I then call her, and then she's annoyed I called her cuz she was hurrying to go outside to go to her appointment. She used that hour to shower, dry hair and find clothes. But the problem imo, is that she doesn't tell me she's leaving home. If I didn't call her, I would've waited way more than an hour. Probably untill she returns home.
To me: "I'm going to shower", or "I'm going to toilet", does not mean: this conversation is ended and we talk later in x amount of hours. Especially not if we're in a conversation (even if it gets interrupted by someone else). Imo, I don't find it considerate of her. I mean, she knows I'm waiting.
With the shower, she could've said: I'm going to shower but I have to hurry to catch my appointment. Or after the shower she could've told me that she's in a hurry. With the toilet example, she could've just told me "I wanna be alone for a bit while watching a video so don't wait for me".
Another example, she tells me "i'm going to the gym, we can talk when I'm home". I'm like, okay. But then she's gone sometimes for 5 hours. Why? Because she decides to go a shop and then drink a tea in a cafe and then when she returns home, decided to watch something for half an hour and then she asks "call?". And I find that annoying. I like a headsup in that situation. Like, to me, there's a difference in being gone 2-3h and 5 hours. Like, I prefer if she tells me after the gym "i'm going to drink something and then return home to spend some time for myself and then we can call".
What all these things have in common, is that she says she's doing "x" but in reality she's also doing y z and other stuff.
With the shower example, I asked her: in real life, would u do that as well? I'm sitting in the living room, while you're showering. And then u just leave home instead of saying goodbye or something.Or when we live together and I cook dinner for us, would u also return home much later than anticipated which makes the food go cold or something.
When I try talking to her about it, she says "it's never enough with you. U always want to talk more." And she says "I don't want to explain every minute of my life to u". Which I do understand but I just don't think it's okay to just keep me hanging without notice.
What do u guys think? Am I controlling? Should I work on this?
Like, I have no problem if she wants to spend the whole evening with other ppl. To not be able to call me for numerous hours. But I just like to know that. Especially if we're in a conversation or sharing a time in bed together in the morning.
I suggested to her to be clear in communication with me. To treat me like I'm oblivious to subtle hints of u wanting to end the conversation to do something else. For example; Instead of saying "I'm going to the toilet" (while after that she's preparing stuff to study with me without telling me so I'm cluelessly waiting in the bed for her to return), she should say "I'm going to the toilet. And gonna prepare myself to study, u should do the same. See u in 20 minutes" or something like that. Is that a good suggestion?
Any advice is welcome
submitted by Darthkaja to relationship_advice [link] [comments]

2023.06.04 13:51 JoshAsdvgi The Lost Woman

The Lost Woman

The Lost Woman

long time ago the Blackfeet were camped on Backfat Creek.
There was in the camp a man who had but one wife, and he thought a great deal of her.
He never wanted to have two wives.
As time passed they had a child, a little girl.
Along toward the end of the summer, this man’s wife wanted to get some berries, and she asked her husband to take her to a certain place where berries grew, so that she could get some.
The man said to his wife: “At this time of the year, I do not like to go to that place to pick berries.
There are always Snake or Crow war parties travelling about there.”
The woman wanted very much to go, and she coaxed her husband about it a great deal; and at last he said he would go, and they started, and many women followed them.
When they came to where the berries grew, the man said to his wife: “There are the berries down in that ravine.
You may go down there and pick them, and I will go up on this hill and stand guard.
If I see any one coming, I will call out to you, and you must all get on your horses and run.” So the women went down to pick berries.
The man went up on the hill and sat down and looked over the country.
After a little time, he looked down into another ravine not far off, and saw that it was full of horsemen coming.
They started to gallop up towards him, and he called out in a loud voice, “Run, run, the enemy is rushing on us.”
The women started to run, and he jumped on his horse and followed them.
The enemy rushed after them, and he drew his bow and arrows, and got ready to fight and defend the women.
After they had gone a little way, the enemy had gained so much that they were shooting at the Blackfeet with their arrows, and the man was riding back and forth behind the women, and whipping up the horses, now of one, now of another, to make them go faster.
The enemy kept getting closer, and at last they were so near that they were beginning to thrust at him with their lances, and he was dodging them and throwing himself down, now on one side of his horse, and then on the other.
At length he found that he could no longer defend all the women, so he made up his mind to leave those that had the slowest horses to the mercy of the enemy, while he would go on with those that had the faster ones.
When he found that he must leave the women, he was excited and rode on ahead; but as he passed, he heard some one call out to him, “Don’t leave me,” and he looked to one side, and saw that he was leaving his wife.
When he heard his wife call out thus to him, he said to her: “There is no life for me here.
You are a fine-looking woman.
They will not kill you, but there is no life for me.”
She answered: “No, take pity on me.
Do not leave me.
My horse is giving out. Let us both get on one horse and then, if we are caught, we will die together.”
When he heard this, his heart was touched and he said: “No, wife, I will not leave you. Run up beside my horse and jump on behind me.”
The enemy were now so near that they had killed or captured some of the women, and they had come up close enough to the man so that they got ready to hit at him with their war clubs.
His horse was now wounded in places with arrows, but it was a good, strong, fast horse.
His wife rode up close to him, and jumped on his horse behind him.
When he started to run with her, the enemy had come up on either side of him, and some were behind him, but they were afraid to shoot their arrows for fear of hitting their own people, so they struck at the man with their war clubs.
But they did not want to kill the woman, and they did not hurt him.
They reached out with their hands to try to pull the woman off the horse; but she had put her arms around her husband and held on tight, and they could not get her off, but they tore her clothing off her.
As she held her husband, he could not use his arrows, and could not fight to defend himself.
His horse was now going very slowly, and all the enemy had caught up to them, and were all around them.
The man said to his wife: “Never mind, let them take you: they will not kill you.
You are too handsome a woman for them to kill you.”
His wife said, “No, it is no harm for us both to die together.”
When he saw that his wife would not get off the horse and that he could not fight, he said to her: “Here, look out!
You are crowding me on to the neck of the horse.
Sit further back.”
He began to edge himself back, and at last, when he got his wife pretty far back on the horse, he gave a great push and shoved her off behind.
When she fell off, his horse had more speed and began to run away from the enemy, and he would shoot back his arrows; and now, when they would ride up to strike him with their hatchets, he would shoot them and kill them, and they began to be afraid of him, and to edge away from him.
His horse was very long-winded; and now, as he was drawing away from the enemy, there were only two who were yet able to keep up with him.
The rest were being left behind, and they stopped, and went back to where the others had killed or captured the women; and now only two men were pursuing.
After a little while, the Blackfoot jumped off his horse to fight on foot, and the two enemies rode up on either side of him, but a long way off, and jumped off their horses. When he saw the two on either side of him, he took a sheaf of arrows in his hand and began to rush, first toward the one on the right, and then toward the one on the left.
As he did this, he saw that one of the men, when he ran toward him and threatened to shoot, would draw away from him, while the other would stand still.
Then he knew that one of them was a coward and the other a brave man.
But all the time they were closing in on him.
When he saw that they were closing in on him, he made a rush at the brave man.
This one was shooting arrows all the time; but the Blackfoot did not shoot until he got close to him, and then he shot an arrow into him and ran up to him and hit him with his stone axe and killed him.
Then he turned to the cowardly one and ran at him.
The man turned to run, but the Blackfoot caught him and hit him with his axe and killed him.
After he had killed them, he scalped them and took their arrows, their horses, and the stone knives that they had.
Then he went home, and when he rode into the camp he was crying over the loss of his wife.
When he came to his lodge and got off his horse, his friends went up to him and asked what was the matter.
He told them how all the women had been killed, and how he had been pursued by two enemies, and had fought with them and killed them both, and he showed them the arrows and the horses and the scalps.
He told the women’s relations that they had all been killed; and all were in great sorrow, and crying over the loss of their friends.
The next morning they held a council, and it was decided that a party should go out and see where the battle had been, and find out what had become of the women.
When they got to the place, they found all the women there dead, except this man’s wife Her they could not find.
They also found the two Indians that the man had said that he had killed, and, besides, many others that he had killed when he was running away.
When he got back to the camp, this Blackfoot picked up his child and put it on his back, and walked round the camp mourning and crying, and the child crying, for four days and four nights, until he was exhausted and worn out, and then he fell asleep. When the rest of the people saw him walking about mourning, and that he would not eat nor drink, their hearts were very sore, and they felt very sorry for him and for the child, for he was a man greatly thought of by the people.
While he lay there asleep, the chief of the camp came to him and woke him, and said: “Well, friend, what have you decided on? What is your mind? What are you going to do?”
The man answered: “My child is lonely. It will not eat. It is crying for its mother.
It will not notice any one. I am going to look for my wife.”
The chief said, “I cannot say anything.”
He went about to all the lodges and told the people that this man was going away to seek his wife.
Now there was in the camp a strong medicine man, who was not married and would not marry at all.
He had said, “When I had my dream, it told me that I must never have a wife.”
The man who had lost his wife had a very beautiful sister, who had never married.
She was very proud and very handsome.
Many men had wanted to marry her, but she would not have anything to do with any man.
The medicine man secretly loved this handsome girl, the sister of the poor man.
When he heard of this poor man’s misfortune, the medicine man was in great sorrow, and cried over it.
He sent word to the poor man, saying: “Go and tell this man that I have promised never to take a wife, but that if he will give me his beautiful sister, he need not go to look for his wife. I will send my secret helper in search of her.”
When the young girl heard what this medicine man had said, she sent word to him, saying, “Yes, if you bring my brother’s wife home, and I see her sitting here by his side, I will marry you, but not before.”
But she did not mean what she said. She intended to deceive him in some way, and not to marry him at all.
When the girl sent this message to him, the medicine man sent for her and her brother to come to his lodge.
When they had come, he spoke to the poor man and said, “If I bring your wife here, are you willing to give me your sister for my wife?” The poor man answered, “Yes.” But the young girl kept quiet in his presence, and had nothing to say.
Then the medicine man said to them: “Go. To-night in the middle of the night you will hear me sing.” He sent everybody out of his lodge, and said to the people: “I will close the door of my lodge, and I do not want any one to come in to-night, nor to look through the door.
A spirit will come to me to-night.” He made the people know, by a sign put out before the door of his lodge, that no one must enter it, until such time as he was through making his medicine.
Then he built a fire, and began to get out all his medicine.
He unwrapped his bundle and took out his pipe and his rattles and his other things. After a time, the fire burned down until it was only coals and his lodge was dark, and on the fire he threw sweet-scented herbs, sweet grass, and sweet pine, so as to draw his dream-helper to him.
Now in the middle of the night he was in the lodge singing, when suddenly the people heard a strange voice in the lodge say: “Well, my chief, I have come. What is it?”
The medicine man said, “I want you to help me.” The voice said, “Yes, I know it, and I know what you want me to do.” The medicine man asked, “What is it?”
The voice said, “You want me to go and get a woman.” The medicine man answered: “That is what I want. I want you to go and get a woman—the lost woman.” The voice said to him, “Did I not tell you never to call me, unless you were in great need of my help?”
The medicine man answered, “Yes, but that girl that was never going to be married is going to be given to me through your help.”
Then the voice said, “Oh!” and it was silent for a little while.
Then it went on and said: “Well, we have a good feeling for you, and you have been a long time not married; so we will help you to get that girl, and you will have her.
Yes, we have great pity on you. We will go and look for this woman, and will try to find her, but I cannot promise you that we will bring her; but we will try.
We will go, and in four nights I will be back here again at this same time, and I think that I can bring the woman; but I will not promise.
While I am gone, I will let you know how I get on. Now I am going away.”
And then the people heard in the lodge a sound like a strong wind, and nothing more. He was gone.
Some people went and told the sister what the medicine man and the voice had been saying, and the girl was very down-hearted, and cried over the idea that she must be married, and that she had been forced into it in this way.
When the dream person went away, he came late at night to the camp of the Snakes, the enemy.
The woman who had been captured was always crying over the loss of her man and her child. She had another husband now.
The man who had captured her had taken her for his wife.
As she was lying there, in her husband’s lodge, crying for sorrow for her loss, the dream person came to her.
Her husband was asleep.
The dream-helper touched her and pushed her a little, and she looked up and saw a person standing by her side; but she did not know who it was.
The person whispered in her ear, “Get up, I want to take you home.”
She began to edge away from her husband, and at length got up, and all the time the person was moving toward the door.
She followed him out, and saw him walk away from the lodge, and she went after. The person kept ahead, and the woman followed him, and they went away, travelling very fast.
After they had travelled some distance, she called out to the dream person to stop, for she was getting tired.
Then the person stopped, and when he saw the woman sitting, he would sit down, but he would not talk to her.
As they travelled on, the woman, when she got tired, would sit down, and because she was very tired, she would fall asleep; and when she awoke and looked up, she always saw the person walking away from her, and she would get up and follow him.
When day came, the shape would be far ahead of her, but at night it would keep closer.
When she spoke to this person, the woman would call him “young man.”
At one time she said to him, “Young man, my moccasins are all worn out, and my feet are getting very sore, and I am very tired and hungry.”
When she had said this, she sat down and fell asleep, and as she was falling asleep, she saw the person going away from her. He went back to the lodge of the medicine man.
During this night the camp heard the medicine man singing his song, and they knew that the dream person must be back again, or that his chief must be calling him.
The medicine man had unwrapped his bundle, and had taken out all his things, and again had a fire of coals, on which he burned sweet pine and sweet grass.
Those who were listening heard a voice say: “Well, my chief, I am back again, and I am here to tell you something. I am bringing the woman you sent me after.
She is very hungry and has no moccasins. Get me those things, and I will take them back to her.”
The medicine man went out of the lodge, and called to the poor man, who was mourning for his wife, that he wanted to see him.
The man came, carrying the child on his back, to hear what the medicine man had to say.
He said to him: “Get some moccasins and something to eat for your wife. I want to send them to her.
She is coming.” The poor man went to his sister, and told her to give him some moccasins and some pemmican. She made a bundle of these things, and the man took them to the medicine man, who gave them to the dream person; and again he disappeared out of the lodge like a wind.
When the woman awoke in the morning and started to get up, she hit her face against a bundle lying by her, and when she opened it, she found in it moccasins and some pemmican; and she put on the moccasins and ate, and while she was putting on the moccasins and eating, she looked over to where she had last seen the person, and he was sitting there with his back toward her.
She could never see his face.
When she had finished eating, he got up and went on, and she rose and followed.
They went on, and the woman thought, “Now I have travelled two days and two nights with this young man, and I wonder what kind of a man he is. He seems to take no notice of me.”
So she made up her mind to walk fast and to try to overtake him, and see what sort of a man he was.
She started to do so, but however fast she walked, it made no difference.
She could not overtake him.
Whether she walked fast, or whether she walked slow, he was always the same distance from her.
They travelled on until night, and then she lay down again and fell asleep.
She dreamed that the young man had left her again.
The dream person had really left her, and had gone back to the medicine man’s lodge, and said to him: “Well, my chief, I am back again.
I am bringing the woman.
You must tell this poor man to get on his horse, and ride back toward Milk River (the Teton).
Let him go in among the high hills on this side of the Muddy, and let him wait there until daylight, and look toward the hills of Milk River; and after the sun is up a little way, he will see a band of antelope running toward him, along the trail that the Blackfeet travel.
It will be his wife who has frightened these antelope.
Let him wait there for a while, and he will see a person coming.
This will be his wife. Then let him go to meet her, for she has no moccasins.
She will be glad to see him, for she is crying all the time.”
The medicine man told the poor man this, and he got on his horse and started, as he had been told.
He could not believe that it was true. But he went.
At last he got to the place, and a little while after the sun had risen, as he was lying on a hill looking toward the hills of the Milk River, he saw a band of antelope running toward him, as he had been told he would see.
He lay there for a long time, but saw nothing else come in sight; and finally he got angry and thought that what had been told him was a lie, and he got up to mount his horse and ride back.
Just then he saw, away down, far off on the prairie, a small black speck, but he did not think it was moving, it was so far off,—barely to be seen.
He thought maybe it was a rock.
He lay down again and took sight on the speck by a straw of grass in front of him, and looked for a long time, and after a while he saw the speck pass the straw, and then he knew it was something.
He got on his horse and started to ride up and find out what it was, riding way around it, through the hills and ravines, so that he would not be seen.
He rode up in a ravine behind it, pretty near to it, and then he could see it was a person on foot.
He got out his bow and arrows and held them ready to use, and then started to ride up to it.
He rode toward the person, and at last he got near enough to see that it was his wife. When he saw this, he could not help crying; and as he rode up, the woman looked back, and knew first the horse, and then her husband, and she was so glad that she fell down and knew nothing.
After she had come to herself and they had talked together, they got on the horse and rode off toward camp.
When he came over the hill in sight of camp, all the people began to say, “Here comes the man”; and at last they could see from a distance that he had some one on the horse behind him, and they knew that it must be his wife, and they were glad to see him bringing her back, for he was a man thought a great deal of, and everybody liked him and liked his wife and the way he was kind to her.
Then the handsome girl was given to the medicine man and became his wife.
submitted by JoshAsdvgi to Native_Stories [link] [comments]

2023.06.04 13:51 FishCackledWanda What kind of relationship do you have with your boyfriend's mom?

My bf and I have been together around a year and a half, and we live together.
My bf's mom is okay, she is nice to me and all, but if she weren't my bf's mom it's just not someone I'd have fun hanging out with.
As they moved to my town not that long ago, she doesn't have a lot (if any) friends here.
My bf said that she has a habit od befriending his girlfriends. He said it happened especially with his ex, that they texted all the time and hung out even without him.
I have a feeling she wants to develop the same kind of a relationship with me. For me personally, it's not something I want.
I have nothing against lunch here and there, but lately she has started to text me, offer to drop off stuff when my bf is still at work and I am home, and when she arrives she just sits down and starts chatting and asks what I have for drink. She also invites over during the week and so on and drops hints about doing stuff together. I don't mind activities that include my bf and both of his parents, but I have no desire for one to one relations with her.
So I guess I am wondering how does everyone else manages their (future) mother in law.
submitted by FishCackledWanda to TwoXChromosomes [link] [comments]

2023.06.04 13:50 ArmStoragePlus A theory on the Schwarzette's AI [WFM Episode 20 Spoiler]

Initially, I'm still wondering who could potentially become the new host of the Gundam Schwarzette to soak up the Permet's side effects. But now I think I have the answer of who could become the AI of the Schwarzette if Suletta was the pilot: Petra might end up become Suletta's Gundam in order to save her life.
Previously, when it comes to the AI of Schwarzette, I only thought of three unlike possibilities: either Sophie, Seethia or VimGPT. However, each of these options come with problems of their own.
Just when I thought that there's no way for Suletta to have a fitting donor to be the Schwarzette's AI, Petra has suddenly become the perfect solution of finding a new host for the Schwarzette.
So, would Petra make a good host of the Schwarzette if Suletta becomes the pilot of the Schwarzette?
submitted by ArmStoragePlus to Gundam [link] [comments]

2023.06.04 13:50 Agakame Was this request that unreasonable?

So I(30M) met this Girl (33F) on a Dating app and we immediately hit it of. We had the same values, communication style. We both know what are boundaries are and so on. We had great conversations about a few topics and everything was looking good. I asked her out on a specific day, she told me she is busy but gave me another day. At that day (today) I had to work, which I told her and when I can make it and she was okey with it.
This morning my boss told me because of a technical Issue we will be 15mins late probably. I'm working on a ship so I literally can't get off earlier. So I wrote her apologizing and if it was Okey to meet 30mins(just to be sure not to move the time again) later explaining why. Initial time would have been 16:00.
After a few hours with no answer back I already realised the date is probably not gonna happen anymore. Would have written 1-2 hour before the date to make sure she was okey. 3 hours before the date she writes me that she is not feeling it anymore and she's gonna cancel.
Just wished her the best after and left it at that.
Should I ask her what changed in just 1 day? Or just leave it. I can move on either way but would like to do better in the future.
Anyone has a better explanation why this has happened?
Tldr: Met this girl on a dating app. Planned to meet, had to move the time. Then she cancelled last minute.
submitted by Agakame to dating_advice [link] [comments]

2023.06.04 13:50 AutoModerator [Download Course] Marisa Murgatroyd – The Experience Product Masterclass 2023 (

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In this Module, get ready to turn a handful of sales into an avalanche:
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  • Create a Custom Campaign Stack that suits your dominant marketing style — whether you prefer to sell through 1:1 conversations, speaking to groups, or writing — so marketable feels easier than it ever has before
  • Recieve my entire vault of pre-written scripts, emails and web page templates that you can take and customize or just use “as is” — they’re yours and they’ve generated literally millions of dollars for my other students
  • Stand out with your marketing in a powerful, unique, fresh and engaging way that gets the attention of your ideal customers, which is 99% of the battle in today’s noisy marketplace, so you can make some real money
After that, we start to really dial up the “WOW” for your students…


Supercharge Your Results
Now that you’ve proven your product with real sales and you have a plan for reaching even more people and making even more money, this is where we pour fuel on the fire by “experiencifying” your course.
“Experiencification” is the process of stacking the 10 Core Experiences of The Experience Formula™ into every element of your Experience Product, to increase the effectiveness of your product by 10-30 times.
In this Module you’ll:
  • “Experiencify” your program with the 10 Core Experiences of The Experience Formula™ to create an engaging experience that works with (rather than against) the brain to get your customers “hooked” on taking action and getting results
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  • Embed a powerful process for gathering success stories right into your course, so you can quickly have dozens if not hundreds of glowing testimonials (this is how I ended up with 1480 testimonials and counting for EPM!)


If you're wondering why our courses are priced lower than the original prices and are feeling a bit suspicious (which is understandable), we can provide proof of the course's contents. We can provide a screenshot of the course's contents or send you a freebie, such as an introduction video or another video from the course, to prove that we do have the course. Should you wish to request proof, we kindly ask you to reach out to us.
Please be aware that our courses do not include community access. This is due to the fact that we do not have the authority to manage this feature. Despite our desire to incorporate this aspect, it is, unfortunately, unfeasible.
Explore affordable learning at 🎓! Dive into a world of quality courses handpicked just for you. Download, watch, and achieve more without breaking your budget.
submitted by AutoModerator to HQCoursesGenki [link] [comments]

2023.06.04 13:50 Ok_Effective_1590 skin problems - t-taping

Hello together
I hope someone can help me. I have been doing the T-taping method for a month. Now I notice that I have skin problems. My skin is peeling and itching at the circumcision scar. Does anyone know where this is coming from? Is it because I am tugging too much? Or that I am allergic to the tape?
submitted by Ok_Effective_1590 to foreskin_restoration [link] [comments]

2023.06.04 13:49 throwaway-542789 Did anyone have their wedding booked but decided to elope instead?

Me and my fiance have had the wedding booked since November 2021 and we were looking forward to it. I have my dress, the bridesmaid dresses and deposits all paid for for the day but now that we are both looking at the cost of everything, it's all so expensive, especially as we're trying to save to buy a house as well! And I think when we booked the wedding, we weren't expecting every day things to get so expensive (which in hindsight we should have but when we initially got engaged I did get excited about the day itself but I don't know. There's a lot of other things at play as well)
We've both discussed this a lot because the more we think about it, the more stressed out we're getting but we're also worried that if we did decide to just elope then everyone else is going to get offended (namely my future mother in law) because they don't get a chance to celebrate our day.
We had a pregnancy scare the other month and that just seemed to put things in a whole other perspective for me. I don't actually care about the day, I care more about the marriage working, and so does he. Our wedding isn't for another year, but would this make us absolute dicks if we decided to elope instead?
Any advice is welcome because neither of us really know what to do.
submitted by throwaway-542789 to wedding [link] [comments]

2023.06.04 13:49 lovesignite How to stop feeling immense anxiety & embarrassment over the fact that someone that I was into just wanted to have sex w me whereas I wanted to hangout & get to know him

Had a crush on this guy just before the school year ends. We started talking. Turns out he wanted to get laid before he left. I feel embarrassed & stupid for thinking he maybe wanted to hang out/get to know me as a person. Is it as humiliating as it seems for me? Should i be THIS anxious?
We’ve been kinda sending each other flirty looks/smiles from afar for abt 1-2 ish months now. I thought it was simple ole flirting. He approached me 2 days ago, we talked for 5 mins & then the next day I took the initiative to follow him on insta. He follows back. His line opener when dming me was “miss you” and i was kinda iffy abt it bc uh what? i swerved it and started a conversation and was asking him when he was gonna leave, we start having a lil playful flirty rapport for a good while & then suddenly he says he wanted me to make his last night a good one before he leaves & that I should come over his place. I told him that I’d be down to hang but I don’t do casual and things got awkward and he was like he doesn’t do casual too harhar and that we could just chill then i was like ok lets do something and then he starts making a bunch of excuses abt how we could do something but it’d be late by the time he comes back from this thing he wants to go to and that if im fine we could go grab food after he’s back and im just like uno what its fine and told him to have fun & have a safe trip back home.
I just feel so embarrassed for thinking he was remotely interested in me/wanted to get to know me when really he just wanted to have sex with me. I don’t do casual. Idk why but the thought of it is so anxiety inducing and I’m only comfortable having sex with people im dating. I just feel humiliated and embarrassed for thinking he wanted to hang instead?? I feel STUPID for even voicing out to him that I don’t do casual & that I just wanted to chill. My crippling anxiety is not helping the situation bc all I can think abt is what he thinks of me. He prolly thinks im stupid for even wanting that from him & that im prolly some romance loving prude :/ or that im stupid for wanting to hang out with him on his last night in the city before he leaves. I cant imagine what he’s told his friends.
submitted by lovesignite to Anxiety [link] [comments]

2023.06.04 13:49 Miwo_Art Looking for peeps to join! ^^

Vanilla, going to latest update soon.
Very simple we looking for more people who are dedicated and will spend more time in game, we are a community that look out for each other and recording or streaming for new events or activities. We are thinking of resetting our server in a couple months but before we do so, we would like to find others who can join us and help grow all together! You have to be on YouTube or on twitch to join!
We are a community who is looking to grow each other, so we are going to do events such as recording and video editing tutorials and advice, only for the people who joins!
Current content creators! LavaThor Gamba Goons MiloArt RogueMPro Dyson/Train JJ
Apply click here!
submitted by Miwo_Art to MinecraftServer [link] [comments]

2023.06.04 13:49 Atmosphere_Free Ok, the usual "what should I buy" with a couple exciting twists!

Ok, no twists. Just an observation/question. If I could timetravel to 2017, I would be looking at a BMW c650 gt or a Bergman 650 executive. But, alas, they are no more. Sad, really.
Question 1 - are the 400 cc leftovers as good? I guess I'll include xmax. I'm a big guy.
Question 2 - Should I just focus on the Kymco 550i? Didn't they basically just rebrand that for BMW?
I've seen how people treat their "car alternates", and it ranges from worship to spitting. So I am leaning to buying a new one since the price is managable. Not about the warranty really, it's about the intervening bad care.
Question 3 - Am I missing a contender? Silverwing is gone too, and my grandfather (REALLY) told me to never invest in French Engineering. german, sure. Italian, probably not. Never french. So i'm coming in biased agaist the piaggio trike.

Thanks if you only "sorta-flame" my initial question. long ago, in a galaxy far away (LA in the 90's) I rode a suzuki as my daily commute.
submitted by Atmosphere_Free to scooters [link] [comments]

2023.06.04 13:49 EvaRaw666 Embrace initiative: Take the lead and be the first to make a difference. Start now and pave the way for others to follow. Success begins with that first step🕺

Embrace initiative: Take the lead and be the first to make a difference. Start now and pave the way for others to follow. Success begins with that first step🕺 submitted by EvaRaw666 to cute [link] [comments]

2023.06.04 13:49 Zapstack23 I'm tired. (Introspective Vent)

The following vent is much more of a general vent about my life and thoughts than a vent about a specific bad day or topic. I'm going to be writing quite a bit, so if you don't have the time I don't recommend trying to read it, because I feel you should only read it if you can make it to the end of my vent.
I'm posting this because I just wanna have all my thoughts spilled over a public page. For no particular reason. Maybe people may see this and some may give advice, and while I'd definetly appreciate it, getting advice is not the MAIN reason I am writing this here. I just need to have this sitting here because it's just what my brain is telling me to do.
I have been wanting to write this for maybe a month now, but just never got around to to it until now.
First, a lil' introduction:
I am a guy, I am 16 years old and I was born in Romania and been living here since.
Ok, now without further ado, I will begin listing off the 5 main topics that have been frustrating me for the past few years.

1 My Ethnicity and Its Bullshit

I am a gypsy. More specifically a "spoitor", one of the many subgroups of gypsies in Romania.
Now, I know what you may think when reading that, but no, I am not talking about racism.
I have never been made fun of or bullied for being a gypsy.
So it's not a racism problem. Rather, it's more about the gripes I have with my ethnicity's people myself. More specifically the dumb traditions and culture and how they affect me:
-Our traditions We have so many unnecessarily trashy aspects to our traditions, especially marital ones. So basically, in most cases at least, the groom and bride's parents choose their spouses for them, or at least heavily influence their decision. It usually goes like this: The groom's parents find a bride for their son. They pay the bride's parents money for their daughter's hand in marriage for their son. So the groom and bride end up together because the parents and maybe other relatives decided so, instead of just two people falling in love with eachother and deciding to get married. Although I see that many of the new weds among my close and distant relatives are seemingly happy with their spouses, so I'm not exactly sure about every aspect. But yeah, there's arranged marriage. Now, besides the arrangement of the marriage, I've also noticed many of the grooms and brides pairs are related to some degree, usually not to the point of first degree cousins though. Nonetheless, incest is not as frowned upon in our ethnicity as you'd hope. So there's that. Now besides the fact that many marriages are arranged, and there's a pretty high chance the espoused are somewhat related, most of these marriages occur when the weds are between the ages of 12-17. So, we also got a whole lotta teen marriage. And also, they usually have kids soon after their marriages, so teen pregnancy is also common. And besides their weird obsession with early marriage, they also put so much emphasis on virginity that there's a tradition where relatives will gather at an event where the groom and bride have to have sex for the first time while a white shirt is placed under them, and one of the old relatives (I can't remember exactly which) then takes that bloodied shirt and shows it off to the people at the event to demonstrate the bride's virginity. Oh, I forgot to mention that it's mandatory only for the bride to be a virgin at the time she marries her husband, but the groom could have as many bodies as he wants by then. Which brings me to my next point: Gender inequality. And overall overbearing gender roles you're expected to adhere to.
-Our culture It's really dumb and douchey. Who would have thought? There's a great emphasis on acting grander and richer than you are, excessive cockiness and flexing, unnecesarry conflicts, a lack of education, and overall being an ignorant, insensitive, close-minded and conservative douchebag. Most of our people are homophobic, racist and very judgemental in general. They are very loud and obnoxious towards people, and lack self awareness. They never bring facts to their arguments, instead they just bark at eachother and maybe eventually fight dirty using blades, swords or axes, and over the most stupid irrelevant shit. They also have unconventional, risky jobs. And they're also way more superstitious and guillible on average than non-gypsies. Also more likely to abuse things like alcohol/smoking, and to become beggars. Many of them have improper hygiene. And the kids want to grow up too fast. I could just go on and on. But that's not really culture, it's more of a general personality and way of living.
When it comes to things like music and fashion though, we don't fare much better. Although I do have to say things like that are subjective.
And in my subjective opinion, our music and fashion sucks ass.
The music spoitor gypsies (and gypsies in general) listen pretty much exclusively to is called "manele" (it's very popular with non-gypsy romanians in general too). It's kinda like a oriental type of music with whiny melodic vocals, and there's other variations of it in other balkanic neighbours and middle eastern countries. The drums are pretty much the same in all songs, most of the manele singers sound very similar, and just in general all manele songs sound like eachother. But yeah, I just don't personally fuck with this type of music, however it's pretty much the only music my parents and relatives listen to, so I constantly am bombarded with it. Therefore I've kinda started despising it, even though I'm expected to like it too.
Music aside, my people's sense of fashion sucks ass too. Again, in my subjective opinion.
It's basically tacky ass designs and patterns, slim fitting clothes, edgy text and things like Gucci/Versce type lions and gold prints and just a whole bunch of goofy shit. Also a lot of ugly designer clothes (usually fake). It's more about the brand than the look. But yeah, overall many ridiculous patterns, eyesore bright colors, childish matchy ass outfits and overall clothes that just scream "Give me attention!!!". And once again, I am expected to want to dress like that too. Which I don't.
And how do these things affect me? Well, I am constantly expected to like and embrace/adopt their culture and adhere to their traditions too, and frankly, that's just not who I am, and attempting to be like that just gives me identity crisises and a lack of self expression. Fuck that. Trashy ass culture. It's like you took many of society's flaws and dialed 'em up to 11.

2 My Loneliness and Lack of Connections

I don't have many friends. Outside of my cousins, I'm genuinely friends with only one dude at school. And we pretty much only see eachother at school. Now don't get me wrong, he's a great guy, spending time with him is nice, we have many common interests to discuss and similar moralities. However, I would really like to connect to more people, and have a group of friends I know I could depend on to have fun and hang out with.
I mean there are 2-3 other guys that I don't go to high school with but I went to middle school with. We were friends in middle school and hung out sometimes. I'm technically still friends with them, but we haven't really been seeing eachother. Maybe only once every few months. At this point we're more like acquaintances on good terms than friends. And I just... don't feel very connected to them anymore. Like when we hang out something doesn't feel right. There was this one dude whom me and my best (and only) friend used to be a trio with. But him and my friend got into a fight once and stopped being friends. Then I was basically split between hanging out with the two separately, and eventually I kinda stopped talking to the dude. We never told eachother officially that we're not friends anymore or something, we just kinda fell out of connection with eachother, and I remained friends with my current best friend.
Yet once again, even though I do have one great friend, and a couple of nice cousins I hang out with, it just doesn't feel like enough to me for some reason.
In general, in public at least, I'm a quiet, awkward and shy person, mostly with new people, which made it pretty hard for me to make other friends. I'm introverted too, so my social battery is pretty low. Yet I don't want to be alone, I just don't know how not to be. I've missed quite a few opportunities of meeting new people and meeting older acquaintanes again, yet I was kept away from it by my social anxiety.
I spend most of my time alone, but not necessarily always because I want to.
I desperately want to have a bigger, connected group of friends to hang out with on the daily. Play fun games and record silly videos with them. Discuss personal issues and encourage eachother. Look at the stars in the night sky together and relax. But it just isn't happening, and I don't know how to get over my social anxiety and awkwardness, and it feels impossible to achieve.
I cannot hold a proper conversation with someone if I haven't known them for a while already. I'm reluctant to speak to the staff at stores or tell people on the bus that I need to get off the bus, because I keep fearing people care more than they actually do, and am afraid of judgement. I am especially awkward when it comes to talking to girls.
I feel weirdly envious seeing people hang out in large groups or having a significant other, makes me feel so left out and pathetic, like I'm missing out. I can't help but blame myself, because what else am I supposed to do?
I hate having social anxiety and a lack of social skills. It's eating away at my happiness anytime I remind myself of it.
And when it comes to my parents, well, although I'd say we're on at least ok terms with eachother, their conformation to the previously mentioned gypsy culture they try to enforce on me sours our interactions on the daily, and we just kinda have nothing in common to hang out over. And whenever I try being my true self and express my interests to them they judge me for it. So my relationship with my parents always goes from pretty alright to ohmygodimgonnafuckingleavethishouse. And through it all, I can't help but feel disconnected from them, which is so weird and kinda sad, because I felt genuine love for them when I was younger.
And when it comes to siblings, I have none.
So yeah, I'm lonely and I hate it. But actually trying to interact with new people is scary and tiring, so I hate that too. It's like an endless fucking vicious cycle of feeling depressed due to loneliness and feeling anxious due to attempting to socialize.

3 My Insecurities and Unfortunate Circumstances

I have a major insecurity: I'm a short dude. 5'5 (165 cm). I know it's not something I can change, therefore not something I should waste time and energy focusing on, but I just can't help it. When I see younger people and girls my age taller than me and I feel so bitter. It's just how my brain works. I get fucking happy when I see dudes shorter than me, how fucked up is that?
Besides that, I'm a little chubby, but I've been working on it and I'm like 6 lbs (3 kg) away from reaching my ideal weight. So that's something I'll fix, but in the moment it's still kinda annoying.
That's where the physical insecurities stop. I consider myself somewhat average to even maybe handsome when it comes to my face, just depends on the day. And I don't have problems like acne or crusty skin.
But now come some inconvenient circumstances that make feel more insecure in other areas.
One of them is my parents not wanting to accept my personal style, the way I wanna dress and have my hair cut, and it makes me feel so restricted and like I can't truly be myself. Which by the way is one of the things souring our relationship. While dressing and doing my hair the way they want me to makes them pleased, it also makes me feel opressed and disingenuous.
Another is that I don't really have my own proper room. I mean yeah, there is this room I sleep in and spend most of my time in, but it's less my room, and more just the only bedroom in our house.
So basically, this is my grandpa's fault. He had quite a huge amount of money but was greedy with it, so when he got our house constructed he only built one bedroom for all three of us (me, my mom and my dad). I slept with my parents 'til pretty late because of this, as I only started sleeping alone at the age of 9, when my parents moved to sleep on an extendable couch that becomes a bed, in the living room.
But yeah, the room I sleep is just a bed and a TV, with a closet with my parent's clothes in it, while my clothes are in a closet in the living room, the room my parents sleep in. Confusing, I know. But basically it was like it was never planned for me and my parents to sleep separately, which in turn caused the design of our house to be very inefficent and badly thought out.
I just want a desk in my room, you know? Something to put my PC on. It's currently in the living room.
Speaking of my PC, this one is partially my fault, but after having a potato PC since I was 3, I finally upgraded to a new one 2 years ago. My main goal was of course to run games smoothly. But, because I did improper research and my dumb ass thought the amount of RAM was more important than the video card when it comes to games, I got an expensive PC with a good motherboard and 32 GB of RAM, but with a shitty video card since I didn't focus on it. So yeah, there I was, new PC, but games running just as badly as on the old one because I was stupid.
I mean, even if would've had a good PC now, since it sits in the living room as I mentioned earlier I would have possibly been judged by my parents for the games I played on it, even if there was nothing inherently wrong with them.
And yeah I guess having some self-expressive posters and stickers in "my room" would've been nice too, but that's also not a possibility.
But at least somehow I guess my family got the bigger end of the stick. One of my mother's sisters (my aunt ofc), with her 2 daughters and her husband still have to live with my grandparents AND another one of my aunts and her husband, while another aunt lives in a cheap dirty apartment.
So my grandparents made a lot of money, but refuse to use it, therefore my family and my other direct relatives' families have to live in these flawed ways.
But yeah, I can't wait for us to rebuild our house eventually, so I can have my own proper bedroom and so can my parents.

4 My Lack of Productivity

Since I spend most of my time alone, in a room with only a bed, TV and a closet, I end up spending like 85% of my time on my phone.
Thing is, I have a few interests: drawing, animation, music, writing and photo/video editing. It's just that the combination of a lack of a proper personal space and minimal social interaction make me unable to motivate myself to actually pursue any of these interests or practice them as hobbies. I do doodle sometimes on my phone, but that's about as far as it goes. And I don't even at least consume content that would add to my culture, like watching movies/tv shows, reading books/comics or listening to albums. I just either mindlessly scroll through the same 3 social media apps or watch some meaningless video on YouTube, maybe even while snacking on junk food. Or maybe rub one out to porn after spending too much time picking the video.
Oh, have I mentioned that I'm also doing more poorly than ever when it comes to school and my academic endeavors? Oh, I didn't? Well, now I did. I'm not failing my classes, I'm just not putting in as much effort as I could, because it feels meaningless, but this is such a lazy approach.
So I do nothing good with my free time because of the frustration I have with other things in my life. At best maybe I'll hang out with my cousins.

5 My Overthinking Brain

Honestly, my mind might just be my biggest enemy. Pretty much any second I don't distract myself with my phone, my mind is going all out worrying about the most stupid shit. From cringing at that one thing I did years ago, to having existential crises over wondering what comes after death. From panicking about my future job and career to being overly curious to try drugs. My brain is active all the time, yet it chooses to keep on teasing me with problems I shouldn't even worry about. While I may come off as excessively negative in this rant, I actually am a rather optimistic person a good portion of the time, I just have this inconsistent mood, swinging between depressed and hopeful out of nowhere.
It makes me sometimes wish I was just dumber. So I wouldn't have to overthink anything and lose so much time and so many opportunities.
Basically my actual life is very underwhelming and boring while inside my mind I am constantly overwhelmed by the amount of possibilities and things in this world. Sometimes I even thought about suicide, but never actually considered doing it.
At this point I don't know if I may have some mental illness, and I don't know if I'll find out because if I'd tell my parents I want to see a therapist they'd either probably laugh at me or scold me then bring me to church or some shit.
So yeah. Through all these things that make me so unsatisfied with my life, I can't help but think I'm overreacting. Most of these things are pretty insignificant (I think) but there's so many of them it adds up and makes me want to just cry. But I can't. I'm emotionally numb.
And I'm tired. So tired. Physically and mentally (especially).
Just.. Just tired.
I'm tired.
submitted by Zapstack23 to offmychest [link] [comments]

2023.06.04 13:49 Unusual--Spirit Thoughts on a food registry instead of gifts or money and other money saving ideas?

So we're are not rich people and want to get married as cheaply as possible but with involving as many loved ones as we can.
For feeding everyone we had the idea of having a BBQ, we will supply the meat/ substitutes and setting up a registry for people to bring sides. Pot luck is too risky due to allergies/diet choices, I know a lot of vegans too so we thought a specific list that people can choose from might work well. Plus it's would be cheaper for our guests than a gift or money gift.
We don't want gifts or money, were happy with our stuff and money isn't important to us beyond survival and some comforts.
We're also thinking about instead of hiring an expensive tent we might gather all our friends gazebos (lots of us a festival types) and tie them all together and string up a ton of fairy lights.
We're aiming for a small festival vibe in a feild, if we're lucky and can find somewhere affordable with a few trees to say our vows under.
What do you all think? We have about 7k total at a maximum.
submitted by Unusual--Spirit to Weddingsunder10k [link] [comments]

2023.06.04 13:49 Jaded-Equivalent-679 I'm 28 years old na pero mahal ko pa rin first "boyfriend" ko nung high school

For context, we're both males and pumunta ako sa science high school at dun ko siya nakilala. He was a very soft spoken and lovely guy and we instantly clicked, soon enough nagconfess na siya. We met when we were both 14 years old at 2 years tumagal yung situationship namin, tumigil siya kasi may teacher na nakarinig ng chismis na may kami raw at bading ako tapos nilabas niya yon sa buong klase at mga teacher namin that time, nagalit yung ex ko at di na ko pinansin hanggang sa lumipat na siyang ibang place, akala niya ako yung nagout saming dalawa. Hindi naman homophobic yung teacher na nakaalam pero mahilig siya magkalat ng rumors na wala namang halong katotohanan, kaya pinalabas niya na ako yung nagout saming dalawa and she called me names, wala naman akong magawa kasi estudyante lang naman ako ano bang laban ko sa teacher? That time sobrang mentally drained ko na sa family problems at dumagdag pa siya. Hanggang ngayon, I still hold a grunge against our teacher. Talagang nakakairita kasi that teacher told everyone to ignore me. I felt invisible sa sarili naming classroom, all because of my sexuality and the name-calling.
About the guy: He was my first love, siya yung nakapagturo sakin kung ano ba talaga yung pagmamahal. Oo minsan masakit, pero ganon talaga yung pag-ibig. We had misunderstandings and our 'relationship' became rocky pero we still managed and tried our best to make it right. He was the first one to love me for who I am and I loved him for who he was kaso nakakaputangina yung tadhana at mga tao sa Pinas. Loving him felt surreal, I loved loving him and I saw a future with him. Halos lahat ng love song nadedicate at kinanta ko na sa kanya in those two years haha and up until now I still dedicate songs to him. Nagmamayabang na kung nagmamayabang pero in those 2 years I felt the happiest, I would go as far to say na it was the best love story that destiny created kaso never naging kami officially.
May mga kaibigan pa rin naman ako matapos mangyari yung mga yon, reto daw nila ako kay ganto kay ganyan, magmove on nalang daw ako kasi makakahanap ako ng someone better. They didn't believe me when I told them na hindi ko kaya and siya lang talaga kaya kong mahalin kasi time will pass naman daw. As years passed akala ko rin makakamove on ako pero hindi eh, andon pa rin yung feeling, loving him once wasn't enough for me sana naman nabigyan ako ng oras para mahalin pa siya lalo. I still remember every single thing about him and I'd constantly try to forget him by going out and drinking kaso waepek.
Fast forward 14 years later, mahal ko pa rin ex ko. My friends think na may ka-lowkey ako pero they don't know just how much I miss and love him talaga haha. Nakapasok ako sa top 4 universities pero I ultimately chose UPM. I've become a doctor na rin and lumipat ako sa ibang bansa for a higher salary and since nagsiside hustle ako at nagiinvest nung high school up until now, I earn 7 digits per year.
Most heartbreaking thing for me is the fact na nafulfill ko lahat ng pangako ko sa kanya pero siya naman yung nawawala.
  1. Have a home with a garden in a foreign country.
  2. Have 4 dogs.
  3. Own a business.
  4. Makapasok sa UP.
  5. Be a doctolawyer.
We were supposed to do everything together and be there for each other sa ups and downs, kaso I'm alone at siya nalang kulang para matupad yung huling pangako ko sa kanya. Mamamatay na ata ako bago ko pa matupad yon haha. I promised him he'd be my last, I promised him he'd be the only one I'd ever love, and lastly I promised to get married to him. Siguro some love stories are just meant to be tragic and devastating, pero naasa pa rin ako, hello destiny! I love you my lumpia :)
submitted by Jaded-Equivalent-679 to OffMyChestPH [link] [comments]

2023.06.04 13:49 Fate4u ¸.•*´¨`°•.¸ Magic ¸.•*´¨`°•.¸ New PvM / Social

We are a brand new PvM, social, chill, and relaxing clan, bringing friends to hang out and have fun together! We are building a close community that brings together great and like-minded people who can become friends with one another here. Everyone is welcome, and we will help each other with quests, skills, and minigames. We plan to host regular PvM events in the future, and we have a vision of creating a completely stress-free and friendly environment to learn and have fun together!

We are a small new cc, made about a week ago, we currently need co-leaders and admins to help us grow if you ever wanted to run a cc or take part in helping this is your chance! Msg me on discord if you're interested :)
More information can be found here:,321,548,66280397
submitted by Fate4u to OSRSclanFinder [link] [comments]

2023.06.04 13:48 Girthy_Bulge 39 [M4F] #DMV - Deployed Soldier Looking for College-Age Connection

Hello, ladies (and please, ladies only!) of you like in-shape men in their late 30s? I like to think we're experienced enough to know how to treat a girl right, but still young enough to actually be ABLE to treat a girl right haha :) Do you like men in uniform? I find that tends to be a popular demographic as well...
Just to set expectations, you and I would likely not meet in-person. That's because I am nowhere near my usual East Coast home, and am in fact in [redacted] for the next [redacted] months. So, what I am looking for is a casual, flirty, sexy online relationship of sorts, the parameters of which we can dictate together!
I imagine our conversations would be a mix of smutty and non-smutty topics, though considering what I log onto reddit to do, likely skewing much heavier towards the smutty-- but again, if we click and have some stuff in common, who knows! I don't want to put up any arbitrary rules on it, label it, or establish any expectations-- you have a real life, I have a very real life right now, so let's keep it loosey-goosey and just have fun when the timing works out.
To be sure, while I advertised for college-age girls, anyone over 18 is more than welcome to apply-- I just mentioned college-age in the title because I suspect based on this subreddit, those are the type of women I might attract.
If you're into military guys, great! If not, also great! I don't usually lean too hard into that stuff, but if it gets your motor running I am happy to oblige ;)
One important caveat, please read-- as an experienced Redditor who has engaged in very brief smutty engagements (i.e. erotic roleplaying), I typically have never asked to "verify" the gendeage (roughly) of my counterparts, because, for a quick little anonymous fling, who cares, right? But if we are going to have something more than that (which I hope we do!), I'd ask that you be comfortable sending a verification pic of sorts, and of course I am happy to reciprocate. It certainly does not need to be a nude, or contain your face! And it doesn't have to happen right off the bat either, we can chat and see where the conversation goes first for sure. But I would like to know that the person I am talking to is in fact a girl and of legal age and has the username you contact me under. Hope that makes sense and doesn't come across as creepy or anything! I could explain my rationale, but it's basically that I still continue to get messages from guys...which again, for a normal RP, fine, but I'm not looking to "get to know" another guy.
So ladies, give me a shout if you think you might be interested!
submitted by Girthy_Bulge to AgeGapPersonals [link] [comments]

2023.06.04 13:48 little-orphanannie12 Keep trying to tell myself that if we're meant to be, we will end up together.

It's been 6 months since the breakup, coming on 7 months in a few weeks. We lived together and I had to completely start over- new furniture, place to live, everything. It's definitely been the toughest time of my life and I thought I was starting to get better... I joined a dating app last month and have been on a few dates so far. However, last Friday I found the girl that my ex is now dating on Facebook and my heart dropped... this is the second girl since the breakup that I know for sure he has been with, and she's 3 years younger than me making her 6 years younger than him.
I'm devastated. I was hoping by now he would've reached back out at least to want to talk about us. I haven't heard from him since February when he asked me to confirm something about our old house bills... now all I can do is think "if we are meant to be together, we will end up together." I'm sure this is a stupid thought to have but it's the only thing that is giving me hope. This was the man I thought I was going to settle down with and marry (we both didn't want kids). I don't think I've ever loved anyone like I loved him and I'm not sure I will again.
I can't tell anyone that time makes everything better because right now, I don't feel like that's true. I have been working on improving myself in that time so I have that going for me, but I still think about him every single day... I guess all I can do now is work on getting better and focusing on myself.
submitted by little-orphanannie12 to BreakUps [link] [comments]

2023.06.04 13:48 rmc192975 MP3 Files for Scale Degree Recognition

At the end of this long post, I have links to a couple of zip files (free) that contain ear training samples I created and found helpful.
I have been using transcription for years as a training regimen to play by ear. I worked for years on notation, but finally decided ear playing made more sense for someone in their 60's. I'm doing a lot better lately, and hoped to share some ideas here. A few years ago, I posted some ideas on ear training and some of the ear training mp3 samples I was using at the time to musictheory. The zip file and MrEarUserGuide. These helped me to improve quite a bit, and I've gotten to the point where identifying tonic is easy, pitch labeling by scale degree is pretty good, but not fast, and selectively identifying pitches in a texture is much better.
My approach any music now is to 1) listen, 2) find a tonic, 3) do a quick song breakdown (meter, barlines, intro, verse, chorus) 3) identify melody and harmony pitches. Finding melody and harmony (chord roots) seems most effective when worked on together. I identify pitches by hearing the pitches as a scale degree. That works for all pitches (melody, chord roots, other chord tones, whatever). I identify 12 different scale degrees, and either label them as 1 ♭2 2 ♭3 3 4 ♯4 5 ♭6 6 ♭7 7, or using pitch class number 0, 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, t, e. I sing them as do, ra, re, me, mi, fa, fi, so, le, la, te, ti. Once oriented to a tonal center, they are all recognizable.
It was a real epiphany for me when I realized that, although there are many ways that composers may use to assert a tonic, I can always identify tonic by listening, and then picking out scale degrees that I hear. Registering any pitch to a scale degree, nails down tonic. I don't always have to find tonic first. Once I figure out tonic, everything gets easier. So my real insight (for me at least) is that scale degree recognition (SDR) is fundamental to all aspects of tonal music analysis by ear. Melody motifs are stored in our brains by scale degree (three blind mice, 3 2 1, me re do) as are chord progressions (axis, I-V-vi-IV, 1 5 6 4, do so la fa) .
So I started working my way again through the audio examples in Koska-Payne totally by ear, and that process supports my insight that SDR is the fundamental process to connecting theory to aural analysis.
Once I surmised the importance of SDR (to me), I created two new sets of ear training mp3 samples I can listen to on my phone. I think that the time I spend with these when I am away from my instrument is paying off. My aural analytic abilities are continuing to improve.
There are two sets of samples, the simpler set, consists of a tonic cue followed by a single pitch. The idea is to hear scale degree function in that pitch and recognize it by scale degree. The answers are provided in the sample file name, so I can check my answer on my Apple watch while walking the dog. Answers use pc class identification of scale degree (0, 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, t, e).
The harder set is similar, but now, after the tonic cue, 2 pitches are presented, ie, a dyad. Each dyad is presented ascending, descending, and simultaneously. The answers are once again provided in the file name.
Initially, the harder set was too hard for me. But as I improved, due a lot of activities, such as transcribing music and playing by ear, my accuracy has gotten to high 90's. The thing that's interesting, is once I recognize correctly the scale degree's of any dyad (out of 12*11 = 131 possibilities), I find that I am then retaining tonic, even when presented with chromatic pitches that tend to move my tonic.
On the use of dyads in aural skill development, I reference an article written by a prestigious pedagogue in theory and aural skills:
Rogers, Michael. "The Jersild approach: A sightsinging method from Denmark." College Music Symposium. Vol. 36. College Music Society, 1996.
He says:
"I know of no other single set of practice materials for sightsinging that provides such a vigorous, multifaceted, concentrated, and extended workout for hearing melodic function and for acquiring tonal bearings as Jersild's "Diagram of Functional Progressions".
If you analyze the diagram that Rogers is referring to, you will find that it is essentially, a set of dyads, presented in random order in all keys. The dyads in Jersild's example, are a subset of the 131 dyads in my samples. His dyads always have the final pitch landing on one of the three pitches of the tonic triad (major and minor).
Anyway, if you are interested, you can find the single pitch samples here and the dyad samples here. I separate these samples into 12 different playlists for each of the 12 keys. The tonic pitch is also in the filename.
I am curious what anybody thinks of the ideas about SDR above.
Questions or problems with the mp3 files, reply here or send me a message.
submitted by rmc192975 to Learnmusic [link] [comments]

2023.06.04 13:48 amaaall Is flirting through texts too much could end up the passion of love by the time ?

My boyfriend and i have been together for 10 months. I consider our relationship as a long distance rs because we didn't meet many times but we talk in video chat all the time .. these days i started feeling that i regret flirting all the time or , for example , saying ''i love you'' i felt that now we started saying it as its a normal thing in our life and we don't feel the same thing as the first time he said i love you to me 🦋🦋 Is it normal ? I hope it is and in real life these things will change . Maybe 🥲
submitted by amaaall to dating [link] [comments]

2023.06.04 13:48 DarkSmarts I'd love to see Dan and Arin put together playlists of their favorite music

I was watching their quiz videos last night and a lot of the quizzes ask "what is your favorite type of music?" I'd love to see each of the guys put together public playlists of their top 50-100 songs to really get a feel for what they listen to.
If they've done something like this and I'm not aware of it, would anyone know where to find that?
submitted by DarkSmarts to gamegrumps [link] [comments]

2023.06.04 13:47 ktzvBI I don't know if it belongs here; questions about emotional numbness

Trigger warning in that i speak about what happened.
Hello. I am not certain if my post truly belongs here. my sexual assault situation happened in an intimate relationship, rather than being a random, violent attack. it's a complex situation. it happened dozens of times over the course of five years. it was made worse by the sexual part being horrifically painful due to a medical condition i have. during the attacks i would force myself to dissasociate as the pain was unbearable. it was a conscious decision to dissaciate at the time, i'd just do it.
over the years i started dissasociating as a sort of stress response to anything. then it became incredibly common, involuntary, and at some point i pretty much stopped having emotions at all. the exception is i do get unbelievably frustrated and angry.
it is 10 years since this situation stopped, and i am stuck in this place where i am essentially emotionally numb. no happiness, no sadness, nothing. i pursue no relationships, no friendships. i have mostly abandoned all of my family and friendships as i have no desire to see, talk or hear from anyone and i find 0 joy in relationships or really anything. this is NOT depression. i am not depressed or sad. i am just... nothing.
i have very brief spurts of emotion, usually 1-2 days a month, they might last for a couple hours and are very dull. i'm so grateful when i have them, but they seem to leave me as quickly as they appear. in comparison, prior to this situation, i was highly emotional and lived a very fullfilling life full of emotion. there was a lot of terrible things happening to me, but at least i felt emotion.
i posted this in a ptsd forum but i thought it might be relevant here. i'm curious if anyone else has dealt with this. if so, did you find recovery from this? i have been seeing a therapist to try and work on the trauma, and though we've made great progress in other areas in those 7-8 months, i've found no real change in my lack of emotions.
submitted by ktzvBI to sexualassault [link] [comments]