(This is a repost from 4 weeks ago.)
Hi everyone,
With Wrath challenge starting I wanted to post this to hopefully help some people complete Aksis challenge easier. The challenge is that after every Aksis teleport, you need to get both the slam and the supercharge. (You can’t miss either - some people seem to think it’s okay as long as you get the supercharge even if you miss the slam. That is wrong.) With six max light guardians with decent weapons, this should be a two phase fight, so you will need to get six slams and six supercharges, which means on average two actions (slam or supercharge) per team member. A very good team can do it in one teleport (one Warlock and five Titans will be great for this). This is not the longest challenge (that honor still belongs to Oryx challenge which always takes 15 minutes), but is the most unforgiving challenge, where a single mistake can cause the challenge to fail. And you can’t get “lucky” like Atheon challenge (if you have one or two weak players, you just need them teleported with an experienced Relic holder once and you can complete the challenge as long as the team has enough DPS to one-phase the fight).

Weapons

Load-out wise, the best weapons are:

• Unto Dust (from Dead Orbit) with Cluster Bomb (if you are a Hunter, you want Field Scout and Tripod; if you are a Titan or Warlock, you want two reload perks or Tripod, assuming you have an exotic chest piece that gives you extra heavy ammo). FYI, other Cluster Bomb rockets are not as good, as none can fire as quickly as Unto Dust. The only 25 Rate of Fire rocket launchers I know are Unto Dust and The Smolder, The Warpath and Elulim’s Frenzy are at 18, while Hunger of Crota and Gjallarhorn are at 11.
• Shotgun with Final Round (Found Verdict and Fourth Horseman are great)

If you don’t have Unto Dust, you can use:

• Dark Drinker
• High impact sniper (Ex Machina is the best, but Event Horizon or Devil’s Dawn will work too)

Don’t combine Dark Drinker with a shotgun unless you are the cannoneer, otherwise you can be stuck shooting your primary depending on your empowerment status during the first two teleports.
If you have a high Impact Scout (examples are Keystone 01 (from Dead Orbit) and Badger CCL) with Explosive Rounds, you can one-shot shanks from across the map. Hand cannons can one-shot shanks too, but you need to be fairly close to them.

Classes

Following are recommended load-outs per class.

Titan (the dominant destroyer):

• Sunbreaker
• Thermite Grenade (Armamentarium will be great)
• Melting Point
• Simmering Flames (I do not recommend Memory of Felwinter - it will cancel Simmering Flames, also you will not have the super for captains)

Try to get 300 Discipline and 300 Strength. If you can’t get both, Discipline is more important. Do not use your super on the boss, most of your damage comes from your grenades. (You can use your super to kill the captain.) Throw the grenade on the ground in front of Aksis so the burning line of fire goes underneath his entire body. Mix in a shotgun shell every two grenades or so. Punch him for Melting Point every 5 seconds if possible. You need to jump a bit for Melting Point; you can punch his kneecaps or body, but not his shins.

Warlock (the essential supporter):

• Sunsinger
• Fusion Grenade (Starfire Protocol will be great)
• Song of Flame
• Viking Funeral
• Touch of Flame

The reason for Fusion Grenade is that it counts for two ticks for Viking Funeral while other grenades only count as one. If you pop your Radiance right after each teleport, you can use Radiance all three times. Throw as many grenades as possible to keep Viking Funeral active. In the third teleport, if you have more than one Warlock, the first one who gets to Aksis should pop Radiance first, then the second one a few seconds later. When you pop Radiance, call out your position (“Song of Flame by the Stairs”) so the Titans know where to find you.

Hunter (the useful assistant):

• Gunslinger with Celestial Nighthawk
• Deadeye
• Keyhole (I heard this stacks with Celestial Nighthawk, but I may be wrong)
• Over The Horizon

You can use the Golden Gun on the captain. If you still have the Golden Gun when Aksis starts teleporting, shoot him just after the last bomb hits - Aksis will take damage after the bomb, and assuming the team gets the supercharge, you can immediately fire another Golden Gun at him.
If you don’t have Celestial Nighthawk, you can use Nightstalker, but do not tether Aksis unless you are sure no Titan will be near the boss during that round. (Titans can move pretty fast, so it’s probably best if you don’t use tether on the boss at all.) You can use the tether on the captain.

The Battle

First phase of the fight (before empowerments) is all about staying out of Aksis’ sight. If you are left or right, stay at the inside edge of the stairs at the beginning, then take a few steps forward and stay just behind the left/right supercharge plates when Aksis goes to either side. If you are in middle, stay behind one of the pillars at the beginning, then go to the center (my favorite spot is the front edge of the back-mid teleport platform). If you see any SIVA swarms around you, you are standing at the wrong spot.
The riskiest part of the battle is the captains. I recommend killing as many shanks as you can find before challenging the captain. If you are on the right side, go around the left of the big pillar - the captain can shoot you directly if you go straight to him. Also going around the pillar will help you find any straggling shanks. Don’t be afraid to use your super on the captain, especially if you’re a Titan - your super is worthless for boss damage. If you’re a Celestial Nighthawk Hunter, there is a small benefit of not using the super (you can use that one shot on Aksis), but unless your partner is a Titan, I recommend just shooting the captain with your Golden Gun. That one shot on Aksis is probably not going to be the difference between success and failure, while you or your teammate dying to the captain can very well be.
Occasionally, a side captain can teleport into the wall. If that happens, call out (like “left captain is in the wall!”). The middle cannoneer should bring the cannon to that side and shoot the cannot through the gap of the wall panels. One charged cannon shot will take down the captain. If the cannon doesn’t drop out of the wall, you can jump up to grab it. (You can kill the captain by shooting your guns through the wall panels, but it is much easier with the cannon.)

Empowerment

Once the empowerment starts, cut the chatter and concentrate on callouts. If there is double empowerment, the cannon shifts. Pick up the cannon and go where you need to go, and shoot servitors from there. If you are not comfortable shooting servitors from across the map, you can shoot two servitors from up close before moving to your final location.
Mini-tip: The order of servitors that comes from any one tunnel is Solar, Void, Arc, then back to Solar. (You can memorize this as “SiVA”.) If you are a cannoneer, look into your tunnel before you leave, thinking about the question (“is my next servitor going to be here?”) For example, if you have the Solar cannon, and you see an Arc servitor in your tunnel first, you know your second servitor is going to be here.
Another mini-tip: If you are calling out servitors, mention which order it is, like “second Arc in middle” or “third Void in left”. That will help a cannoneer know where to go first in case there is more than one outstanding servitor of the same element.
It takes seven bombs to completely deplete Aksis’ shield. Most teams will let left and right throw only two bombs and have the middle throw three. (This is easiest in case the side cannoneers are not comfortable shooting across the map - for example, if you have to be on right for empowerment, it is easier to hit the middle servitor than the left servitor.) The middle bomber should watch Aksis’ shield to make sure nobody has missed, and call out “I have the final bomb in middle, empowerments get in position”. If you have enough time, do a three-two-one countdown before throwing the bomb. Left and right bomber can pick up the third bomb but make sure you wait for the middle bomber’s call out and throw at the same time.
Empowered people on the side should stand next to the pillar, slightly ahead of the yellow stripes on the outside (non-Aksis side). The middle empowered person should stand between the two boxes. Make sure you can see Aksis so you know exactly when he teleports. (You can see a wisp of SIVA trail when he teleports, although it is hard to tell if he’s going front-mid or back-mid by just looking at it.) When Aksis teleports, check your front teleport; if he’s not there, immediately turn around and run to your supercharge plate. The red bar of supercharge shows up a half second after Aksis teleports, so do not wait for the bar to show up before you start running. Also, you will not get a prompt to press a button to supercharge (you will get a prompt for slamming his back); so just run to the plate and spam the supercharge button repeatedly. If you are slamming Aksis’ back and you think you got there very early, give a couple of heartbeats before slamming him; the supercharge plate will close about half a second after you slam. You don’t have to wait for the “Guardians Superchanged!” message, the supercharge can be slightly after the slam.
There should always be an empowered person in left, right, and middle, regardless of where Aksis is. Middle empowered person covers both front and back middle teleports. If Aksis is already on your front teleport, stay near the back (supercharge) plate so you can get the supercharge as soon as Aksis teleports away. If you are left or right, you can stand on the supercharge plate; if you are middle, stand next to the plate so Aksis won't teleport right on top of you. Aksis can come back to the same position more than once, just not consecutively. It is perfectly possible for Aksis to go front-mid, back-mid, and then again to front-mid.
Mini-tip: If the very first teleport is left, then supercharge is always middle. I am not aware of any other teleport/supercharge combos.
If you are empowered, make sure you call out where you are, and go to your next empowerment assignment position before even thinking about damaging Aksis. If you are not empowered, try not to say anything. In particular, never say something like “we need empowered right”. The audio can cut off and sound like “empowered right” which means the opposite. Let the empowered people figure it out; there are three of them, that’s enough people talking over one channel already. Or how I like to say: “if you’re not empowered, just shut your mouth and shoot Aksis”. Also, make sure you don’t stand between empowered people and their teleport or supercharge plates.
There are two schools of thought when it comes to empowerment call outs on the second and third teleports - call out your current location, or call out your original (pre-reassignment) location. Make sure the team is clear which method you are using.

• Calling out the current location. If you are using this method, try avoiding duplicate call outs. For instance, if you are on the right, and you hear “empowered right”, just call out “empowered middle” and start moving immediately in that direction. Also, never tell anyone else to move - if you have duplicate empowerments and someone has to move, that someone is you. If you tell someone else to move, even if said person responds immediately, you may lose a second - that one second can be a difference between success and failure.
• Calling out the original location. The “cannon moves on double empowerment” applies beyond the first teleport if you are using this method. This method is desirable if you have people without mics or weak command of the language used by the team (like me joining a Spanish-speaking group). Put those people on side bombs to make sure they can stay put.

If Aksis is close to the final stand before the first teleport, the most experienced member of the team should make a call whether to damage Aksis between teleports. This is because if a delayed damage (like a cannon exploding right after he teleports, or DOT from a grenade) sends Aksis to the final stand before you can slam him and get supercharge, you can lose the challenge. If Aksis is really close to final stand, you can do the first slam/supercharge as usual (don’t damage him just before the teleport), and then go all out on him. If you are not sure, do not damage Aksis and just concentrate on empowerments until the third teleport.
That’s all, sorry for the wall of text. Let me know if you have any comments.
Have fun, PSN: Lightfoot (without the “one” at end)

My friend, "Sarah" (26F) and I (25F) are both half-Japanese and we both became friends because of that. It's really nice to have a friend who can understand what it's like to be biracial.
Sarah is into anime and is interested in Japanese culture. She enjoys educating people about her Japanese culture, despite the fact that she knows nothing about it. Sometimes she spreads wrong information about Japan. She once said it's very common for young teen in Japan to get double eyelid surgery to make their eyes look smaller. There's so much more but I'll spare you the details.
Last week, she told me that she's going to legally change her last name to her Mom's MAIDEN name because she feels "more Japanese". She's never even been to Japan. Her mom is Japanese-American and doesn't even speak Japanese. Sarah told me that she's little envious of me because people knew I was Japanese because of my last name. I told her, "Just because you're Japanese by blood, it doesn't mean you're actually Japanese. The only reason why you consider yourself "Japanese" is because of your obsession with Anime. Changing your last name to your Mom's maiden name is fucking stupid." She blew up on me and said "You're so fucking white it's embarrassing" and left.
She sent me a text yesterday saying "So you're not going to apologize to me?". Apologize for what exactly? For speaking the truth?
I do understand why she wants to change her last name but at the same time, I honestly think it's a bit excessive. She's trying too hard to be more Japanese.
AITA for acting this way? Or was I just overreacting?

Hey guys,
A bit of a longer question for background info. I (f29) just recently met a man (m29) overseas while on a trip and we instantly clicked. He was there for work and I was there for fun. It was amazing and we really clicked on an emotional level going out to dinners and talking and laughing. Our time together wasn’t centered around hooking up which was wonderful and he is probably the most thoughtful, generous man I’ve met and has done so much good in the world. It’s been about a month and we’ve stayed in touch every day and he is so sweet and attentive and goes out of his way to connect with me and get to know me. We video called and texted every day and he was so excited to talk to me. He bought tickets to visit me in my country in a few weeks and I’m very excited, however the past few days have been weird. I’m used to us communicating everyday but today will be the 4th day I haven’t heard from him. The last time we talked was totally normal and he was talking about how excited he was to see me and how much he misses me. We had talked all morning and then I sent him a picture of a pretty view and never got a response and it’s been nothing since then. I know he’s alive and well because he was tagged in a recent big work event that he was speaking at so it popped up on his instagram and then he posted about it later. Yes I was investigating lol. It irks me that he hasn’t hit me up but that he posted about something work related on social media, but I also know we JUST started talking and he doesn’t owe me that commitment yet so I don’t feel I have the right to get on him about it either.
About a week before this he had his brother come into town for the first time in 3 years so he wasn’t as present in conversation (understandably so) although I still heard from him everyday although very sparingly so I voiced how I totally understood he was busy but to just keeping me in the loop with a quick text or explanation is all I need because I was trying to book something for when he visits and that was the plan was to jump on a call so I was a little annoyed to not hear from him but I didn’t say anything because I was so happy for him that he was spending time with his brother. He was super understanding but then a few days later he disappeared again. His brother is back in a different country so it’s probably just work relatives and catching up, and I don’t want to bring it up again because at this point I just feel like I’m nagging him and I don’t want to come off as too dependent or needy so I just haven’t reached out.
He owns his own company and is incredibly busy to say the least and I know he was complaining the last few weeks about not having enough time in the day to get enough done. He is also going on a work trip in a few days for a month in a different country so preparing for that has been very hectic as his company is rapidly growing and while it’s a good problem to have, he can’t keep up.
I got out of a relationship last year with someone who was a diagnosed narcissist and his behaviors were very very extreme and the things he did to me in that relationship were absolutely horrible but one of those things was that he would ghost me for days saying he was so busy with work and then I would find out later that he was flying women out and cheating on me. He also did that in the final discard where I was ignored for days and it turned out he was cheating on me with my replacement. I was blindsided and it has made me have severe trust issues ever since. So sometimes I get very paranoid but I don’t want to project that onto my partner especially because we are still getting to know each other and he has been amazing to me this entire time so I haven’t said this to him.
Besides being friends on social media and seeing into his life, his whole family and work and friends know about me and I’m flying out in November to meet everyone. So I know he isn’t living some double life or anything like that but my mind automatically goes to that because of my past. He is very serious about marriage and kids in his life in the next several years which is exactly what I want and has been very good about showing me his intentions with his actions versus just telling me what I want to hear so that’s why this is all so surprising and making me sad. I worried that maybe I was just being love bombed because everything happened so quickly but I’m trying to be cognizant of my own issues that can cloud my judgement sometimes. He hasn’t been in a relationship in a while because he was so focused on his career so I know I’m not a rebound or anything and we talked about it and he asked that we be exclusive and not be with anyone else until we meet again and decide how to take this to the next level as far as the distance goes. He moved everything around including cutting his work trip up to come visit me for this trip for several weeks and support me at an event I’m working so I feel that he shows me his intentions are genuine and maybe he just doesn’t see the miscommunication as as big of a deal as I do since we are still at the beginning stage and at a huge distance living so far apart with very very very busy lives. I also run a business and work 60+ hours a week so I get being busy. But I’m big on communication so I’m struggling with this. I worry that if I overreact and complain too much, I will scare him away and he’ll think I’m too needy and can’t handle him being busy, because being with my ex made me question if I’m now an anxious person because of all the neglect I faced with him constantly. I’m basically trying to find a new normal and don’t want it to ruin my new relationship so I’d rather ask around to get an idea instead of unloading my baggage onto him.
I guess because of my abusive past relationship I don’t really know what is normal anymore and this experience is triggering some old awful awful feelings that I used to have with my ex when I was trying to convince myself everything was fine when it was anything but that. I definitely plan to talk to him about this and explain why it is important to me but just curious, when you first started talking to your person, would days go by without hearing from them? Is that normal in an LDR or a regular one I suppose especially because this is all so new? It’s only been a month but we were talking everyday before this. I know it’s different for every relationship but I haven’t been new in the dating scene in years so I can’t remember what is normal :( TIA!
TLD how often did you talk to your SO when you first started dating? Is it normal to go days without hearing from them? It’s been just a month but we went from talking every day to 4 days of silence and he is supposed to visit me in a few weeks. The last time we talked everything was normal and he was super excited to fly to my country and build with me.

like the title says, I noticed today that my dog (8 y/o female golden retriever) has swelling on her back right hock. The right hock was originally larger than the left, probably double or triple in size-just on a regular day. I did have the vet aspirate it, and nothing was wrong. XRay was done and “soft tissue swelling in the hock, boney changes back right hock”. This was done July of last year. fast forward to today, I noticed she has pitting edema on the back right hock. she is not limping and when I press on it, no signs of pain. it stops right below the hock and goes up to her lower thigh. I don’t think it’s a bite or anything, due to no pain, the localized edema, and she has not been outside or in an area long enough where she could have been bit. i’m assuming unrelated, but she was put under and she did have her teeth cleaned this past friday. vet was supposed to call me back today but he never got to me. Has any one ever seen this before?

Hello Trailblazers!
With Silver Wolf’s release I thought it would be a good idea to look at potential team comps that emphasize her unique debuff. These teams are based on inflicting a new weakness onto enemies in order to cause more breaks while dealing increased damage of that type. I’ll be looking mostly at teams that are available as of 1.1 with some speculation based on characters coming in 1.2. For a team to even be considered it must have either an Abundance or Preservation character. At least one of either is necessary for MoC and team guides aren't really needed for any other content. Eventually all Silver Wolf havers will want to build mono Quantum but we have no confirmation for when we’ll see a Quantum Preservation or Abundance unit and even then we’ll need one for Quantum unit to make a full team without Qingque.
Mono Physical:
Clara, Sushang, Natasha
Out of the gate this is one of the strongest Mono teams you can assemble. Clara acts as both tank and damage dealer filling two roles at once and doing a great job with it. Sushang’s kit benefits from attacking weakness broken enemies, making her a consistent and stellar dps. Natasha is the only free (and fantastic) healer in the game and you’ve more than likely already built her. This team has everything you could want outside of being skill point heavy. When Luka is released in 1.2 he may replace one of the damage dealers but without knowing the specifics of his kit it seems unlikely he’d remove either of the top damage dealers in the game.
Mono Fire:
Himeko/Hook, Asta, Preservation MC
A bit of a weird one. At higher levels Preservation MC likely won’t be able to cover for all the damage you’ll be taking, and without an Abundance character you won't have to way to get your health back up. But if you are able to keep everyone alive and healthy this team has a ton of potential. Frequent weakness breaks fuel Himeko’s talent (she needs all the help she can get). Hook can capitalize on her enemy being permanently burned as it becomes a boost to her damage and energy regen. Lastly, Asta always facing an enemy with a fire weakness turns her into a menace. Her talent will always generate two stacks and her skill will destroy toughness bars like no one's business. These teams are strong and I especially expect to see the Hook team a lot since it’s so f2p friendly
Mono Ice:
Yanqing, Pela, Gepard
Possibly the strongest Mono team available right now. Freeze is extremely strong since it robs the enemy of an action. The team works like a dream. You get to repeatedly inflict freeze, save Gepard’s ult for when the enemy does get a turn, keep Yanqing from taking damage, and inflict Pela’s defense debuff at every opportunity. This is a team with no real downsides and packs a lot of power behind. I just hope you got lucky enough on the standard banner to make it work.
Mono Lightning:
Jing Yuan, Tingyun, Bailu
Kafka, Serval, Bailu
Serval, Tingyun, Bailu
In 1.2 Lightning will have the most characters in a single element due to having two rate up banners and frankly there are lots of strong characters and combos to be found here. Jing Yuan and Tingyun are already run together fairly often due to their synergy and the Planetary Rendezvous light cone. Add in Bailu and you have a strong and fully functional team even if it doesn't particularly capitalize on shock. On the other hand a team with the queens of DoT Kafka and Serval will take any extra source of shock they can get. Both of their kits want to maximize shock uptime and Kafka in particular can make use of extra stacks of shock. Either team is great but expensive due to needing one of two banner five stars and a specific standard 5 star.
Serval and Tingyun combo is a more f2p alternative that will function well but won’t reach the heights of the other teams.
Mono Imaginary:
Welt, Yukong, Luocha
I’ll start by admitting my bias, I love Welt and will try to build this team. Welt excels as a hybrid dps/debuffer. Repeatedly inflicting slow and imprison delays enemies actions, grants your team extra turns, and prevents damage to your allies. Yukong generates team wide buffs, transforming Welt from a sub dps to main dps. Since Luocha scales off of attack he benefits from these buffs as well and can heal without using skill points. If the team works as intended you’d be able to prevent the enemy from ever taking an action but there’s very little chance it’ll function like that in practice. Consider this team if you love Welt and want to pull both 1.1 5 stars for their utility.
Duo Comps
All duo comps for 1.1 and 1.2 will be fairly similar. Silver Wolf will generate Quantum weakness for either Seele or Qingque boosting their damage. Getting breaks of the other element isn’t guaranteed or even what you're going for. Using two characters of another element just means that turns where the element implanted is not Quantum you’re still lowering toughness while guaranteeing that the following turn Quantum will be implanted. Because of this these duos will focus primarily on support.
Duo Physical:
Clara, Natasha
Luka, Natasha
Natasha is still an all star. Any opportunity to use her is worth it. Clara can act as a tank while putting out great damage. Without knowing official details of Luka’s kit we can’t say if it’s worth it to stack him with Silver Wolf but it’s a more f2p option worth looking at.
Duo Fire:
Asta, Preservation MC
Like with the mono fire team, giving Asta fire weakness to exploit is great. The downside is since it’s not your focus she won’t be able to benefit every turn or even most turns. Still viable since it brings a buffer and defensive support to an excellent offensive core.
Duo Ice:
Pela, Gepard/March 7th
Who needs Yanqing anyway? Exchanging the premiere ice dps for a Quantum dps gives you greater flexibility since you don’t need to prevent all potential damage. Combining freeze and entangle should give you plenty of extra turns especially combined with Seele’s insane speed and resets.
Duo Lighting:
Tingyun, Bailu
A strong buffer and healer is more than enough to suport an already strong dps core. A nice bonus is that Tingyun will grant your dps lighting damage so even during off turns your dps will reduce toughness.
Duo Imaginary:
Welt/Yukong, Luocha
Pick between an extra debuffer or a teamwide buffer. Both are good with Welt being extraordinary at causing break. Another great comp for delaying enemies and letting Seele go crazy.
General Thoughts:
Hopefully this shows you how many options there are for both mono teams and double duos. Unfortunately many of these teams require 5 stars from eitheboth the standard and featured banners making them expensive and elusive. When we get a Quantum Preservation or Abundance unit the number of possible duo comps will greatly increase. You’ll be able to trade a defensive unit for a dps which will allow you to create new teams that focus on the element of the dps. For now wind is the biggest loser when it comes to Silver Wolf synergy. Bronya is one of the best supports in the game but without any sort of defensive wind support, mono wind and duo wind teams just aren't possible.

Because I’m 99% sure it’ll be my fault and not the golden child’s. I swear to God I’m sick of the double standard in the house. If I leave something out for a little bit, I’m getting hounded for it, but her shit could be out for days and have nothing said. If I put someone else’s stuff on top of the dryer, I’m made to feel stupid and lazy, but if she does it, nothing gets said. It’s fucking bullshit

Why did they change it so Marmaid bras are now made of their scales? Think about it.
When a mermaid improvises a bra out of a seashell or other object you would find in the ocean, you think to yourself "Yeah, they have breasts because they feed their young with milk like mammals do." But when you make a bra part of their body, then things start getting weird.
First of all, do they still have nipples? If so, how do they breastfeed? But if they don't breastfeed, then why do they have breasts at all? Humans evolved breasts as a means of sexual selection, since other mammals only have pronounced mammeries when lactating, but for mermaids that would be a serious downside since breasts increase drag and affect bouyancy when swimming. And even if we assume they're purely aesthetic sort of like the horns of certain animals or peacock feathers, if they don't breastfeed then does that mean they lay eggs? Out of what exactly?
(On a side note, if mermaids dont' menstruate like humans do, then Ariel probably got the fright of her life shortly after the movie).
Pushing all of that aside, if the top half is supposed to all human but there are scales just on that spot mimicking a bikini top, you completely neglect and all sense of realism to the design. A straight split of human to fish is believable if both sides are kept seperate, but as soon as you start breaking that distcintion, it feels more like watching a stylistic artwork than an actual creature. And if they were going for the stylistic angle, why wouldn't they just go all the way and give them bras? It's not like seashell or coconut bras don't exist in real life. If they wanted to double down on the modesty, you could just make fabric bras out of ship sails, or metal ones since merpeople can apparenlty forge those (I mean, underwater volcanoes and metal deposits are a thing).
Alternatively, they could've weaved seaweed into a shirt or dress. Or they could've used many different materials to create bikini tops or other clothing. Sharks are apparently non-sentient, you can use their skin to make leather. Turtle's leave their shells behind when they die, you could do something with that. And there's gotta be at least one plant you can make into frabic underwater, or at least something that grows close to the ocean. Actually, Or heck, Ursala had a full-on dress in both adaptations. And the fact that they could tie their bras with a colored material in the animated version proves they had some kind of fabric.
And another thing, using hair to cover up a girl's top like they did the live action is the last option you go to when making a kids movie. With animated Ariel it was easy to keep the camera off her bits cause she was wearing a bra, but in the live action, the camera is effectively stuck at a certain angle since you can't risk even a single frame of nipple. I know that the animated one had the advantage of not having a physical camera, but the fact that almost every shot of naked ariel in the live action was either a close-up to her face, a distant shot with her body behind something, or an obscured silhoette proves my point, whereas the animated version had a full-body shot, a standing shot, multiple distances, a top-down view, distinct colors for the beauty shot, and was still able to keep most of Ariel's genitalia hidden save for a very brief frame of the curve of her butt (And lets be real, you could see that anyway in her mermaid form)
I should mention that whether or not female toplessness should even be censored in children's films, I believe that at least in our current culture, the association of female nipples with eroticism is a bit too strong to be tested via a movie aimed towards kids. If disconnecting the two is a goal to be achieved, I believe the best angle would be to start with adult movies and gradually move down the ages while learning ways to boobs on screen without sexualizing them.
Minor tangent aside, it'd be another deal entirely if the merpeople had scales all over their body. Consider the Harry Potter merpeople who double down on the fish side of things and cover their whole body in scales. Other designs have scales spotted all around the mer-person's body that gradullly decrease as you reach the head, and there are two convinient patches of scales that cover the breasts. There is also the design of which the fish half keeps the same texture but becomes more humanoid right up until the chest where it immediatley shifts to skin so it looks like a dress (Although giving the mermaid any kind of cleavage ruins this effect). But when you have a single area of scales that's a perfect line across the entire torso AND has frills that resemble that of a bikini top that serve no swimming purpose whatsoever, that just looks wrong. Nature doesn't do perfectly contured lines, it's random and hyperpractical. And again, if they wanted to make a stylish top rather than a realistic one, they could've just given her a physical bikini top.
In summary, it does not make sense to as to why mermaids have bras made of their own scales, as they are in the Live Action Little Mermaid.

We explore the official first contact, from both perspectives.
I hope you enjoy.
------------------------
Memory Transcription Subject: Noah Williams, FTL Tester and Scientific Researcher
Date[standardized human time]: July 12, 2136
Oh my god, this is actually happening.
We chatted with the aliens, who had somehow managed to translate our binary. Translation probably would have gone faster if we sent them some math and numeral charts, but I guess we got more than a bit ahead of ourselves. We reached a point where we received instructions to wait on the third planet from the star to meet them. We agreed to the meeting.
While Sarah grew more excited, I calmed myself down. We were making first contact with a completely alien species. We needed to maintain some professionality and keep ourselves from ruining everything. As I reminded Sarah of this fact, she calmed down as well.
We decided to send a message back to Earth regarding our discovery. It may take a couple of days to reach there with the current state of our communications tech, but it was a good precaution in case our stay ended up being longer than that.
Anyway, we had landed on the surface of the third planet, near the night side as to have the sun and any protective gear not interfere with our vision of each other, and waited.
Eventually, the "venlil" ship landed just a few dozen feet away from us. It seemed to be very powerfully built and robust. Though this might be an effect of a much more solid design being needed to escape the higher gravity, it also seemed built for warfare, despite not having any visible weapons. If I didn't already know that they accepted our peace offer, I would have been just a little bit worried.
Sarah and I got our space suits ready, and we entered the airlock. Through the window of the airlock I could already see a welcoming party.
They all wore bright orange suits, contrasting quite vividly with our own bluish grey suits. They stood on long and powerful legs, adapted for high gravity, with their weight being balanced by a long tail. They seemed to have very stocky bodies, though that might be a side effect of the suits, and their arms, while short, seemed powerful. They had very peculiar headgear, with it being a large dome half made of glass. Maybe it's a physiological requirement? Anyway, what little I could see of their heads reminded me of sheep.
"You ready for this?" Sarah said on the radio as the airlock finally drained itself. I nodded.
Steeling up my nerves, I opened the door and went outside.
------------------------
[Memory transcription partially translated to modern terms]
Memory transcription subject: Governess Tarva of the Venlil Republic
Date[standardized human time]: July 12, 2136
The "humans" finally stepped out of their relatively small ship, and my ears shot up and my tail wagged with excitement. My teeth threatened to whistle as the air I breathed hissed through my gaps and blowhole.
I took a good long look at them as they approached.
They were lanky and tall, perhaps adapted for a gravity slightly lower than ours, and stood completely upright without any tail for balance. They must have some very muscular legs. I could safely assume the same thing with their arms, as they were almost as their legs, and were equipped with powerful hands. Their hands had five very dexterous digits, indicating rather fine motor skills. At least, when compared to venlil claws. Their heads were almost completely covered in a tight helm and neckpiece, showing only their face. They must rely very heavily on facial and body expression, and thus won't be used to looking at ears for cues.
As they grew closer, I saw more fine details, specifically in their face. Their irises and pupils were small, leaving a lot of exposed sclera, and they darted around in their sockets without needing the head to move. They also had strips of fur above their eyes, further cementing the idea that they were facial expressors. Their mouths had naturally fully closing lips, and they had a set of downward facing nostrils on a protruding nose.
I then noticed differences in the body shape between the two humans. One was boxy and more broad at the shoulders, while the other was broader at the hips and seemed to have breasts. Breasts were a familiar trait, as we venlil use them to feed our pups. From there, I could also assume that they also gave live birth. To see convergent evolution was a pleasant surprise.
Though, no area of the female's body seemed swollen with child, so she didn't seem pregnant. Maybe they were also doubling as fat stores and display features.
As the humans approached, they stopped right in front of us.
They opened their lips and turned the corners upwards, exposing their teeth to us. I took notice of the small canines and barely visible molars. This must be some gesture of good will, though I was unsure how.
I tried to imitate the gesture as best as I could, my ear nervously flicking as I did so. I send a tail flick of greeting towards them, though I doubt they understood it.
The male sent his open hand towards me, and I stared at it for a moment before reaching towards it. He grabbed my hand and shook firmly. This must be their greeting.
We awkwardly stared at each other for a moment after the handshake, unsure of what to do. I opened my mouth to speak, but then remembered that we weren't connected to whatever channel their suits may have. I turned my gaze to Kam.
"Is there a radio loop to connect to?"
"Yes, just give me a moment." After a couple seconds of tapping on the pad, he turned to me. "Should we join?"
"We should ask the humans for permission first. It is only polite." I said.
I looked back to the humans, and tapped the side of my helm with my claw while flicking my ear, trying to communicate my desire to connect with their radio loop. Their faces contorted into a slightly lopsided expression, with one brow strip raised, while tapping on where I assumed their ears and radio pieces were. I sent an affirmative flick of the ear, before remembering that they were facial expressors. I decided to imitate one of their tooth displays of goodwill, hoping that would siffice in getting the message across. The two humans looked at each other for a moment, and then they turned back to be and bobbed their heads up and down. That must've been their signal of affirmation.
I send an affirming ear flick to Kam, and a couple seconds later, a ping was heard, indicating to me that I was connected. I saw the humans' eyes widen and dart around, before settling on me almost expectantly.
I gestured to myself as I looked them in the eye.
"Tarva."
First
Previous

In this modern world of ours, where digital dalliances are as common as Bertie's misguided engagements, we find ourselves making frequent use of the VPN - a handy device that ensures our online antics remain a private affair. It's much like Jeeves being the only one privy to Bertie's late-night endeavours - all very hush-hush and confidential.
However, my friends, we often overlook the snide villain that lurks in the corners of our pocket - the smartphone. Yes, it may seem all helpful and benign, assisting in browsing, communicating, and generally making a nuisance of itself, but beneath that glossy exterior, it bears an accomplice - the carrier.
The moment you turn to your mobile data for browsing, you've unknowingly invited the carrier into your private soiree. It now doubles as your ISP, peeping into your traffic and DNS requests like a nosy neighbour, ready to sell your little secrets.
So, my fellow internet enthusiasts, if we are to truly cloak our digital footprints, it becomes imperative to put the kibosh on both the home ISP and the treacherous mobile carrier. Fear not, for this very piece will serve as your personal Jeeves, providing timely guidance on the choicest mobile VPNs - ones that will keep both these prying parties at bay. Ah, the peace of a truly private online venture, now that's something to aspire to!
The Fine Art of Selecting a Mobile VPN: A Gentleman's Guide
In the bustling sphere of mobile usage, akin to Bertie Wooster's hectic social life, certain pursuits demand precedence. The act of torrenting on one's iPhone, for instance, rarely assumes a position of great urgency, much like Bertie's sporadic inclination towards gainful employment. Hence, we calibrate our judgement to suit the matter at hand. Allow me to present the yardstick we employed for choosing the crème de la crème of VPNs for mobile:
Firstly, much like our affable Jeeves, the VPN should be a paragon of discretion, retaining naught that could identify its users or betray their utilisation of the service.
Secondly, its encryption standards should be as sturdy and current as Jeeves's understanding of the Works of Nietzsche.
Next in line, it should ensure a quick and steadfast connection, mirroring Jeeves's unwavering reliability.
Just as Jeeves is ever-watchful for potential social faux pas, the VPN should provide DNS leak protection, keeping your online affairs snug as a bug.
Moreover, the VPN should boast of an amply sized server network, much akin to Bertie's impressive Rolodex of aunts.
And lastly, a gentleman always appreciates good entertainment; thus, the VPN must offer commendable support for streaming services, ensuring that one may enjoy one's Netflix and Amazon Prime Video without hindrance. Akin to the inimitable Jeeves, it must have a knack for keeping things running smoothly.
NordVPN
One couldn't help but be wholeheartedly taken with NordVPN, our top pick, much like Aunt Agatha's penchant for eligible debutantes. Finding its roots in Panama, an idyllic spot where compulsory data retention laws are as scarce as Bertie's inclination towards matrimony, NordVPN spreads its network across a staggering 5600 servers, proficient in the arts of OpenVPN, WireGuard (NordLynx), and IKEv2 protocols.
When it comes to upholding privacy and security, NordVPN is the very epitome of decorum in the bustling world of commercial VPNs. Just as Jeeves is privy to all manner of Bertie's misadventures, yet remains a model of discretion, NordVPN operates under a strict policy of keeping mum about your online frolics. It employs encryption techniques worthy of a Blandings' mystery and proves as impervious to IP, DNS, or WebRTC leaks as Jeeves is to lapses in judgement.
Of particular importance for those of us gallivanting about with mobile devices is NordVPN's inclusion of a kill switch in all its applications. This trusty feature, like a dutiful valet, bars all traffic from leaving your device should the VPN connection drop, a common pitfall for those of us engrossed in the goings-on of our handheld contraptions.
In our speed trials, NordVPN emerged as sprightly as a young Galahad, ideally suited for high-definition revelries (4K/8K). A reliable companion for streaming, it possesses impressive credentials in the realm of entertainment support.
Finally, NordVPN is as versatile as a Drones Club member during a shove-ha'penny tournament. It caters to Windows, macOS, Linux, Android, iOS, and Amazon FireTV, while also extending a helping hand to NAS devices and routers.
ExpressVPN
Ensconced in the British Virgin Islands, which I must hasten to add, contrary to public misconception, does not fall under the scepter of the UK, ExpressVPN is an absolute corker. Those plagued by misgivings of the Five Eyes Nations can breathe easy, much like Bertie Wooster when Aunt Agatha departs for an extended European sojourn.
Proving itself as versatile as a Drones Club member at a cocktail mixing competition, ExpressVPN parades an impressive repertoire of secure VPN protocols – OpenVPN, Lightway, and IKEv2 – across its extensive empire of 3000+ servers. In an agreeable display of transparency, its custom VPN protocol, Lightway, is as open source as one of Bertie's ill-advised confessions and hence, open to scrutiny.
When it comes to upholding the standards of security, ExpressVPN displays a discipline rivaling that of a disciplined butler. It employs the AES-256 encryption, 4096-bit RSA keys, and SHA256 authentication, all the while keeping perfect forward secrecy (PFS) under its wing. Taking a leaf out of Jeeves' book, it leaves no trace of its tasks; all servers function from volatile memory (RAM) and are booted from read-only disks, ensuring that no trace of data can take up residence in the system’s hard drives. Adding a feather to its cap, it features a kill switch in all of its applications, so you won’t be left in the lurch, feeling as forlorn as Bertie without his morning tea. Rest assured, we detected no IP, DNS, or WebRTC leaks.
But don’t mistake all this diligence for the sluggishness of an overfed dachshund. ExpressVPN maintains the zest of a young Wooster, emerging as one of the nippiest VPNs we've put to the test. Its proficiency in streaming support could have the stiffest upper lip twitching in approval and, against all odds, it manages to cozy up with Hulu and HBO, usually rather reluctant to fraternize with VPNs.
Delivering native applications for Windows, macOS, Linux, iOS, Android, and a selection of routers, ExpressVPN is as accommodating as the ever-reliable Jeeves, always at hand with a resolution to your every digital predicament.
SurfsharkVPN
While not as seasoned as some of the more experienced gents in the VPN club, Surfshark has quickly shown itself to be a plucky go-getter, securing a spot in our highly coveted list of top-notch mobile VPNs. Much like one of Bingo Little's romantic forays, it may be fresh-faced, but it's certainly not to be underestimated.
Located in the Netherlands, which is refreshingly free of compulsory data retention laws but still part of the Nine Eyes, Surfshark reminds one of a gentleman's club adhering to a strict code of silence. Its stringent no-logging and privacy policies ensure it's as discreet as Jeeves at a dinner party – it simply wouldn't have anything to divulge, even if the law enforcement played the part of an inquisitive Aunt Dahlia.
Under the bonnet, Surfshark wields an impressive arsenal, featuring support for OpenVPN, WireGuard, and IPsec. It employs 256-bit AES encryption in a frisky pas de deux with a SHA512 authentication hash and a 2048-bit DHE-RSA key exchange that's as dedicated to perfect forward secrecy (PFS) as Jeeves is to impeccable service. Suffice to say, the chaps at Surfshark have ensured their service is as leak-free as a newly corked bottle of Uncle George's favourite vintage.
Surfshark’s apps, like a dutiful valet, come equipped with a kill switch, a feature as essential to the mobile user as a cocktail shaker at a Drones Club gathering.
Whether it's for your streaming needs, a little endeavour from behind the Great Firewall, or the simultaneous connections of an army of devices, Surfshark reveals itself to be a virtual Swiss Army knife. Providing native apps for Windows, macOS, Linux, iOS, Android, and Amazon FireTV, Surfshark seems ready to serve, a digital Jeeves at your beck and call.
Tackling the Mobile VPN: A Gentleman's Guide to Virtual Privacy
Ensuring privacy with a VPN on your mobile contraption, dear reader, isn't unlike taming the beast on a desktop machine. The procedure is as similar as two identical twins at the Drones Club, both insisting they are, in fact, the other. Here's how to go about it:
Firstly, do cast your vote and sign up with one of the aforementioned VPN providers. Like attending a country-house weekend, your presence must be confirmed. We heartily endorse NordVPN, much like one recommends a restorative Brandy Alexander after a particularly strenuous day of golf.
Next, direct your attention to downloading your chosen provider's mobile application. Much like summoning Jeeves with a ring of the bell, the process should be quick and without much ado.
Having accomplished the first two tasks, it's time to refer to the instructions provided by your VPN master. It should be a walk in the park, akin to Bertie's ambles round the park in Aunt Dahlia's stead. You'll likely need to pick a server and give the "Connect" button a nudge. Should any difficulties arise, rest assured your VPN provider shall rush to your aid, like a trusty valet saving a hapless Bertie from yet another tight spot.
And there you have it. Your VPN application, like Jeeves, is now ready and waiting in the background, equipped to ensure your virtual escapades remain as private as a gentleman's diary.
The Rigorous Trials of the VPN: A Gentleman's Guide to Testing
Beneath your gaze is the regimen employed to scrutinize these elusive VPNs. In the spirit of fairness and objectivity, one must be as consistent as a country house butler, and as keen as Bertie when confronted with a three-tiered spread of scones. Thus, our method is laid bare for all to inspect.
Speed: A key component to any VPN, much like an impeccable sense of style, is speed. A sluggish VPN is as much an inconvenience as an overly chatty aunt, and it may hinder your streaming or web perusal. The VPNs that receive our stamp of approval have galloped through our speed tests with the zeal of a racehorse at the Ascot.
Servers worldwide: Access to a wide variety of geographical territories is crucial. Much like Bertie's world-wide forays to escape Aunt Agatha's clutches, a global server range can help bypass bothersome geo-restrictions. Also, finding a server close to home to optimise speed is much easier with a global spread.
Multiple protocols: We recommend a provider offering a cocktail of secure VPN protocols, as different situations might call for different ones. Imagine having to pick just one cocktail at the Drones Club - an unthinkable proposition! Protocols like IKEv2, OpenVPN, and WireGuard are often found in our top picks.
Ease-of-use: A truly commendable VPN provider should be as approachable as a cordial chat with old Jeeves himself. We ensure that our selected providers offer mobile applications as easy to handle as a brolly in the English drizzle.
Streaming services: In today's world, accessing streaming platforms via a VPN is akin to tackling one of Aunt Dahlia's 'little tasks.' We put our VPNs through their paces, testing them on a veritable feast of popular platforms such as Netflix, Amazon Prime Video, BBC iPlayer, HBO Max, Disney+, Hulu, and so forth.
Torrenting: Many of the VPN patrons are, as Bertie might put it, jolly keen on sharing files. However, not all VPN providers are as generous with their networks. Our methodology checks for torrenting allowances and dedicated P2P servers to see how well they manage this exchange of digital pleasantries.
Security and privacy: The crux of any VPN is akin to the unyielding trust in one's butler. We delve into each provider's privacy policy, logging standards, encryption protocols and their imperviousness to any leaks, be they IP address or DNS in nature. Just as we trust Jeeves with our darkest secrets, we ensure these VPNs hold your privacy in the highest regard.

To me, personally, I think Geforce NOW makes the most sense, of all the streaming services.
The one bit of leverage that they have, is that theoretically everything is available on their platform, as it's simply a mechanical service. The entire library is up to the player to purchase and fill.
But, they changed how they operate, and seem to make agreements, that they ostensibly pay for, licenses, for stuff to stream on their platform.
If THAT is the case, then why all this strangeness? Does Geforce NOW make a cut of games sold through their platform? Do they get a reduced licensing fee, because they are directing traffic to purchase portals that the studio/publisher already has agreements with?
I don't know that Geforce NOW is actually obligated to do this, or curate what can be streamed on their platform, as again, it's the client that purchases and owns the product key.
So...why are they doing this? Maybe because it's kinda messy, and they would rather stay out of such issues.
If a publisher or studio makes a streaming deal with a service like Amazon Luna or Xcloud, does Geforce NOW circumvent an agreement between two other parties, by providing a functionally different portal?
I would argue it doesn't, as Geforce NOW still requires the purchase of the game. But maybe the publisher approaches Geforce NOW, and asks that Geforce NOW doesn't support their title, because it weakens their value with a prospective cloud platform deal that might purchase a license to stream their game that is more immediately lucrative than legit portal purchases.
Geforce NOW is literally a threat to the game streaming market. Publishers want to get in on this money, and don't want to see their games on a service, especially when their appears to be a double dip opportunity.
It's all rather confusing. Geforce NOW backed down, and even though they operate entirely differently than other streaming platforms....they have agreed to essentially act exactly like other streaming platforms.

Wish List: Teslas below, AA/SS/1S melee below, rare apparel/masks, or Vanguard Scout armor with +Strength/Cavalier
I still need the following Teslas: H/50c/25,,, Jug/50c/25,,, Troub/50c/25
I still need the following AA/SS/1S melee: cultist blade,,, gulper smacker
Complete Trade List: (Thank you for your time browsing this huge list!!!)
FIXERS: AA/25/15r,,, AA/25/15v,,, AA/50c/15v,,, AA/50vhc/25,,, AA/50L/25,,, AA/AP/25,,, AA/E/Dur,,, Ari/25/15r,,, Ari/E/15r,,, Ari/E/25,,, B/25/15v,,, B/50L/25,,, BAP/25,,, Exe/25/25,,, Exe/50c/25,,, Exe/AP/25,,, Exe/E/25,,, F/50c/25,,, GouE/25,,, GS/50c/25,,, GS/E/25,,, H/50c/25,,, Jug/50c/25,,, Jug/AP/25,,, Junk/25/15r,,, Junk/50c/15v,,, Junk/50c/25,,, Junk/50L/25,,, Junk/AP/25,,, Junk/E/15v,,, Med/25/25,,, Med/50c/25,,, Med/AP/25,,, Mu/AP/25,,, MS/50c/25,,, MS/AP/25,,, N/AP/25,,, N/E/25,,, Q/25/15r,,, Q/25/15v,,, Q/AP/25,,, St/50c/25,,, St/AP/25,,, St/E/25,,, Su/50c/25,,, Su/AP/25,,, Su/E/25,,, T/50c/25,,, T/AP/25,,, TS/25/15r,,, TS/25/15v,,, TS/50vhc/25,,, TS/AP/25,,, V/AP/25,,, Z/25/25,,, Z/E/25
HANDMADES: AA/E/15v,,, Junk/25/15r,,, MS/E/25,,, Mu/E/25,,, Mu/50c/25,,, Q/50vhc/25
HEAVY WEAPONS: AA/25/90 AGL,,, AA/25/15r Cryolator,,, AA/25/90 Harpoon Gun,,, As/25A/90 Fatman,,, As/25/90 Gatling Plasma,,, B/E/Gho 50cal,,, B/25A/90 Cryolator,,, B/50L/90 Cryolator,,, B/25A/90 Missile Launcher,,, B/50vhc/90 Missile Launcher,,, B/50L/90 AGL,,, Exe/50c/15r Flamer,,, Exe/25A/90 Gatling Plas,,, Exe/E/25 LMG,,, F/50c/25 Cryolator,,, Q/25/15v LMG,,, Q/50L/90 Minigun,,, TS/25/15r Gatling Gun,,, TS/E/25 Minigun,,, V/25/15r 50cal,,, V/25A/90 Cryolator,,, V/25/25 Gatling Gun,,, V/50L/90 Harpoon Gun,,, Z/E/90 LMG
MELEE: AA/SS/1S Death Tambo,,, AA/SS/1S Deathclaw Gauntlet,,, AA/40P/1S Gulper Smacker,,, AA/SS/1S Pole Hook,,, AA/50c/15v Power Fist,,, AA/SS/1S Super Sledge,,, Ari/SS/1S Shovel,,, Ari/SS/1S Sledgehammer,,, As/40P/1S Chainsaw,,, As/40P/1S Drill,,, As/SS/1S Sheepsquatch Staff,,, B/SS/1S Deathclaw Gauntlet,,, B/50c/1S Drill,,, B/SS/25 Gulper Smacker,,, B/SS/25 Meat Hook,,, B/SS/1S Power Fist,,, Exe/40P/25 Drill,,, Exe/50c/1S Power Fist,,, Ext/SS/1S Drill,,, F/40P/40 Chainsaw,,, GS/SS/1S Chainsaw,,, GS/SS/1S Ripper,,, I/SS/1S Death Tambo,,, I/SS/1S Golf Club,,, I/SS/1S Super Sledge,,, Junk/SS/1S Assaultron Blade,,, Junk/SS/1S Security Baton,,, Mu/SS/1S Deathclaw Gauntlet,,, MS/SS/1S Shishkebab,,, Su/SS/1S Spear,,, Su/SS/1S Tire Iron,,, Troub/SS/1S Bowie Knife,,, Troub/SS/1S Golf Club,,, V/SS/1S Combat Knife,,, V/SS/1S Deathclaw Gauntlet,,, V/SS/1S Pole Hook,,, V/SS/1S Sledgehammer,,, Z/SS/1S Fire Axe,,, Z/SS/1S Knuckles,,, Z/SS/1S Pipe Wrench
RAILWAYS: AA/50c/25,,, AA/50vhc/25,,, AA/E/15v,,, AA/E/25,,, Ari/25/15r,,, B/50vhc/25,,, B/E/15r,,, B/E/90,,, F/50c/25,,, F/E/25,,, GS/25/25,,, GS/50c/25,,, H/50c/25,,, I/25/25,,, I/50c/25,,, Junk/E/25,,, Q/50L/90,,, St/50c/25,,, Su/E/25,,, TS/50L/25,,, TS/50vhc/25,,, TS/50c/15r,,, TS/AP/25,,, TS/E/Dur,,, V/25/25,,, V/50c/25,,, Z/E/90
TESLAS: AA/25/15r,,, AA/50L/15r,,, AA/AP/25,,, B/25/Gho,,, Exe/25/15r,,, Ext/25/15r,,, F/25/15r,,, I/25/15r,,, Q/25/250,,, Q/AP/25,,, TS/25/15r,,, TS/25/25,,, V/25/250,,, V/25/Dur,,, V/50L/15r,,, Z/25/15r
AA/25/25 Assaultron Head,,, AA/50c/15v Crossbow,,, AA/50L/25 Enclave Plasma Rifle,,, AA/25/25 Gamma Gun,,, AA/E/15r Hunting Rifle,,, B/AP/25 Compound Bow,,, B/25/25 Gauss Rifle,,, Exe/50c/25 Combat Rifle,,, Exe/50c/25 Double Barrel,,, Exe/E/25 Hunting Rifle,,, Exe/E/25 Lever Action,,, F/50c/15v Compound Bow,,, F/E/25 Double Barrel,,, F/50c/15v Thirst Zapper,,, GouE/25 Double Barrel,,, Gou25/25 Lever Action,,, GS/50c/25 Gamma Gun,,, Jug/E/25 Combat Rifle,,, Jug/50c/25 Laser Rifle,,, Junk/50c/25 Enclave Plasma Rifle,,, Mu/50c/25 Crossbow,,, N/25/25 Enclave Plasma Rifle,,, N/50c/25 Enclave Plasma Rifle,,, Q/50c/25 Assaultron Head,,, Q/25/15r Combat Shotgun,,, Q/25/15r Plasma Rifle,,, St/50c/25 Crossbow,,, St/E/25 Single Action Revolver,,, Su/25/25 Radium Rifle,,, TS/25/15r Combat Rifle,,, TS/50c/25 Combat Rifle,,, V/25/15r Enclave Plasma Rifle,,, V/50c/25 Bow,,, V/AP/25 Crossbow,,, V/50c/25 Gauss Rifle
ARMOR: Aristocrat's Heavy Robot left leg with 7%LED/Sentinel,,, Assassin's Heavy Combat right leg with Strength/Sentinel,,, Assassin's Marine right leg with 7%LED/Sentinel,,, Assassin's T-45 right leg with AP/Sentinel,,, Assassin's USA left arm with +25 Poison resist/Sentinel,,, Auto Stim Heavy Robot right leg with +25 Cryo resist/Sentinel,,, Auto Stim Raider Power left arm with AP/Sentinel,,, Auto Stim USA right arm with 7%LED/Sentinel,,, Auto Stim USA right arm with AP/WWR,,, Auto Stim USA right leg with 7%LED/WWR,,, Auto Stim USA right leg with Strength/WWR,,, Bolstering FSA left leg with AP/Sentinel,,, Bolstering Marine right arm with +25 Cryo resist/Sentinel,,, Bolstering Sturdy Combat left leg with 7%LED/Sentinel,,, Bolstering Trapper chest with AP/Cavalier,,, Bolstering Trapper right arm with 7%LED/Sentinel,,, Bolstering USA left arm with 7%LED/FDC,,, Bolstering USA left leg with slowed hungeWWR,,, Bolstering USA right leg with Charisma/Sentinel,,, Chameleon FSA left leg with 7%LED/Sentinel,,, Chameleon Heavy Leather right arm with AP/WWR,,, Chameleon Marine right leg with AP/HDT,,, Chameleon Raider Power right leg with 7%LED/Sentinel,,, Chameleon Robot chest with 7%LED/WWR,,, Chameleon Trapper left leg with AP/Cavalier,,, Chameleon USA chest with 7%LED/Cavalier,,, Chameleon USA left arm with 7%LED/Sentinel,,, Chameleon USA left leg with +25 Cryo resist/Sentinel,,, Chameleon USA right arm with 7%LED/WWR,,, Chameleon USA right leg with AP/FDC,,, Cloaking Raider Power right leg with 7%LED/WWR,,, Cloaking USA right arm with 7%LED/HDT,,, Exterminator's FSA right arm with 7%LED/Cavalier,,, Exterminator's FSA right leg with 7%LED/Cavalier,,, Ghoul Slayer's FSA right leg with AP/Cavalier,,, Life Saving Combat left leg with AP/WWR,,, Life Saving Trapper left leg with AP/Sentinel,,, Life Saving Trapper right leg with 7%LED/Cavalier,,, Life Saving USA left arm with AP/Cavalier,,, Life Saving USA right arm with +25 Poison resist/Sentinel,,, Mutant's Excavator left arm with 7%LED/Sentinel,,, Mutant's FSA chest with 7%LED/WWR,,, Mutant's FSA left leg with 7%LED/WWR,,, Nocturnal Excavator right leg with 7%LED/Sentinel,,, Nocturnal Marine right arm with AP/Cavalier,,, Nocturnal USA right leg with AP/Sentinel,,, Overeater's Combat left arm with +25 Cryo resist/Cavalier,,, Overeater's Excavator right leg with Luck/Cavalier,,, Overeater's FSA chest with Endurance/Sentinel,,, Overeater's FSA right arm with Luck/Sentinel,,, Overeater's Heavy Combat left arm with 7%LED/JWR,,, Overeater's Heavy Combat right leg with Perception/Sentinel,,, Overeater's Heavy Metal left leg with Strength/Sentinel,,, Overeater's Heavy Raider left arm with 7%LED/Cavalier,,, Overeater's Heavy Raider left leg with Charisma/WWR,,, Overeater's Heavy Robot chest with +25 Rad resist/Sentinel,,, Overeater's Heavy Robot left leg with Agility/WWR,,, Overeater's Heavy Robot right leg with +25 Cryo resist/Cavalier,,, Overeater's Marine left leg with slowed hungeWWR,,, Overeater's Marine right arm with +25 Rad resist/Sentinel,,, Overeater's Marine right leg with +25 Fire resist/Sentinel,,, Overeater's Metal left leg with +25 Cryo resist/Sentinel,,, Overeater's Robot right leg with Endurance/Sentinel,,, Overeater's Trapper left arm with AP/HDT,,, Overeater's Trapper left leg with +25 Fire resist/Sentinel,,, Overeater's Trapper left leg with Perception/WWR,,, Overeater's Trapper right arm with Luck/WWR,,, Overeater's T-60 left arm with +25% Env resist/WWR,,, Overeater's T-60 left arm slowed hungeWWR,,, Overeater's USA chest with +25 Cryo resist/HDT,,, Overeater's USA left arm with +25 Poison resist/Sentinel,,, Overeater's USA right leg with slowed hungeFDC,,, Overeater's Wood left arm with 7%LED/Cavalier,,, Regenerating Heavy Leather right leg with 7%LED/Sentinel,,, Regenerating Heavy Raider right arm with AP/Sentinel,,, Troubleshooter's Excavator right arm with 7%LED/Cavalier,,, Troubleshooter's Marine left arm with AP/Sentinel,,, Troubleshooter's Sturdy Metal right leg with AP/Sentinel,,, Unyielding FSA chest with Intelligence/Dur,,, Unyielding FSA left arm with Charisma/Cavalier,,, Unyielding FSA left leg with AP/FDC,,, Unyielding Heavy Combat chest with Strength/HDT,,, Unyielding Heavy Combat right arm with +25 Poison resist/JWR,,, Unyielding Heavy Combat right leg with 7%LED/Less limb dam,,, Unyielding Heavy Leather right arm with AP/HDT,,, Unyielding Heavy Metal right leg with Endurance/Sentinel,,, Unyielding Marine right arm with +25 Rad resist/Cavalier,,, Unyielding Marine right leg with +25 Fire resist/WWR,,, Unyielding Metal chest with AP/HDT,,, Unyielding Metal right leg with AP/Cavalier,,, Unyielding Robot right arm with Agility/Sentinel,,, Unyielding Sturdy Leather left arm with Strength/WWR,,, Unyielding Sturdy Leather left leg with 7%LED/Sentinel,,, Unyielding Sturdy Metal chest with AP/WWR,,, Unyielding Sturdy Metal left arm with +25 Rad resist/Sentinel,,, Unyielding Trapper left leg with AP/Cavalier,,, Unyielding Trapper right arm with 7%LED/HDT,,, Unyielding USA chest with Charisma/Cavalier,,, Unyielding USA left arm with +25% Env resist/Cavalier,,, Unyielding USA left leg with Charisma/Cavalier,,, Unyielding USA right leg with +25 Poison resist/JWR,,, Unyielding Wood chest with Luck/Cavalier,,, Vanguard's Excavator right leg with Intelligence/Cavalier,,, Vanguard's FSA left arm with slowed hungeSentinel,,, Vanguards's FSA right leg with Strength/Cavalier,,, Vanguard's Heavy Leather right arm with 7%LED/HDT,,, Vanguard's Heavy Robot right arm with 7%LED/HDT,,, Vanguard's Marine right arm with AP/HDT,,, Vanguard's Sturdy Robot left arm with AP/Sentinel,,, Vanguard's Sturdy Robot right leg with 7%LED/WWR,,, Vanguard's USA chest with Luck/Sentinel,,, Vanguard's USA left arm with Intelligence/Sentinel,,, Vanguard's USA left leg with Strength/Cavalier,,, Vanguard's USA right arm with AP/Cavalier,,, Vanguard's USA right leg with Strenght/Cavalier(2),,, Vanguard's Wood chest with Strength/Sentinel,,, Weightless USA left arm with Strength/Sentinel,,, Weightless USA right leg with AP/Cavalier,,, Zealot's USA right arm with AP/WWR,,, Zealot's USA right leg with AP/WWR
PLANS: Alien Blaster,,, Assault rifle,,, Barbed walking cane,,, Baseball bat rocket,,, Baseball bat searing puncturing rocket,,, Bear arm,,, Bear arm heavy mod,,, Boxing glove lead lining,,, Camo Backpack,,, Cave cricket tube,,, Deathclaw gauntlet,,, Dense marine armor torso,,, Dense trapper armor torso,,, Fire station bell,,, Flannel shirt & jeans,,, Hatchet electro fusion,,, Junkyard fountain,,, Machete sacrificial blade,,, Meat Tenderizer,,, Nuka girl area rug,,, Pepper Shaker,,, Pitchfork flamer,,, Protective lining marine underarmor,,, Protective lining raider underarmor,,, Puncturing pole hook,,, Radioactive barrel,,, Raw cement barricade,,, Scorchbeast queen plushie,,, Scorched tube,,, Shielded lining casual underarmor,,, Shielded lining marine underarmor,,, Shielded lining raider underarmor,,, Ski sword skate blade,,, Skiing outfit,,, Sledgehammer heavy searing sharp rocket,,, Small vault girl statue,,, Snallygaster plushie,,, Spiked walking cane,,, The Fixer,,, T-60 BOS knight paint,,, TV Aquarium,,, Ultracite emergency protocols,,, Undershirt & jeans,,, Vintage water cooler,,, WV state bird rug,,, Yao Guai tube,,, Cutting fluid recipe,,, Fasnacht donut recipe,,, Fasnacht sausage recipe,,, Healing salve Ash Heap recipe,,, Healing salve Cranberry Bog recipe,,, Healing salve Mire recipe,,, Formula P recipe,,,Stimpak Diffuser recipe,,, Tato salad recipe
APPAREL: Asylum Uniform Pink,,, Clean Spacesuit,,, Emmett Mountain hazmat suit,,, Garrahan Foreman Outfit and Helmet,,, Grey Fishermans Overalls,,, Hunter's Long Coat,,, Longshoreman Outfit,,, Skiing red and green outfit,,, Straight Jacket Clean,,, ,, Winter Jacket and Jeans
CHEMS: Addictol: 180,,, Berry Mentats: 656,,, Buffout: 1526,,, Calmex: 546,,, Daddy-O: 1072,,, Day Tripper: 803,,, Disease Cure: 415,,, Mentats: 1000,,, Overdrive: 570,,, Psycho: 2825,,, Psychobuff: 1367,,, Psychotats: 1250,,, X-cell: 347
FOOD: Canned meat stew: 65,,, Pepper: 2578,,, Salt: 988,,, Spices: 1433,,, Sugar Bombs(w/rads): 385
MODS: Enclave plasma aligned flamer mod,,, Enclave plasma aligned sniper barrel mod,,, Enclave plasma severe beta wave tuner

If my calculations are correct — and please correct me if they're not, since I didn't even know what the Altador Cup was until about a week ago — it should take roughly 3 hours of constant grinding per day to reach the Double All-Star rank in AC XVIII. This takes into account the 4 Bye Days, and assumes 23 days of full participation throughout the event. Here's the breakdown:

• Each game of Yooyuball is a fixed 3 minutes, maximum. You can bring this time down by 8 seconds for each goal you score, and since you need at least one goal to win the game (and therefore to submit it at all), you'll be operating at a max time of 2 minutes 52 seconds per game. We'll assume a generous 20 second delay in-between games too, just to account for any potential lag, delays, or other possible distractions that would take away from this optimal time. That would mean that each game, worst case, should take 3 minutes 12 seconds to submit. You can submit up to 35 Yooyuball games per day, so altogether, it should take you roughly 112 minutes — just under 2 hours — to slog through Yooyuball each day. This isn't even factoring in if you choose to score multiple goals each game, which would bring your time down even further from there. Doing this will net you 420 points per day, or 9,660 points total to spend at the prize shop when the event is over.
  
• For Shootout Showdown, it is fortunately a bit less cumbersome than the 301 game submission limit would lead you to think. The trick for this game is, you can end it prematurely after scoring a single goal; (the easiest way IMO is to use your mouse, click down to point toward the right end of the goal, and wait for the goalie to wander to the left to score a quick point) after 10 seconds have elapsed per game, such that the timer reads 50 seconds or less. Assuming a 5 second delay between games, each game of Shootout Showdown should then take you approximately 15 seconds max to submit, ergo 301 submissions should take about 1 hour, 15 minutes. This will net you 301 points per day, or 6,923 points total to spend at the prize shop when the event is over.
  

All-in-all, then, assuming it takes this much time for you to get through maxing both games each day, meaning no long breaks or outside interruptions between games, it would take you 187 minutes, or 3 hours, 7 minutes on average, to complete the Double All-Star grind. You would also end up with 16,583 total points to spend once all is said and done.
I'd include the other two games, Make Some Noise and Slushie Slinger in this post as well, but I don't plan on touching either of them for the duration of this event. I've never played either before, and am operating on the assumption that they'd each take longer than the rewards would be worth. But! If you're crazy and dedicated enough to try and max those out each day also, you could theoretically end up with an additional 15,893 points, giving you a total sum of 32,476 points to spend in the prize shop.
With that, good luck, everyone! I hope these numbers serve to help some players out :d

Relavent preamble:
So my parents are notoriously....slow....when it comes to using/embracing new technology. And when I say "new" technology....I mean texting and adding email attachments. Prior to this year, neither of my parents could even send a text, and I think they've had smartphones for at a couple of years. My mom (the NParent of the equation), started texting more regularly since they moved to a rural area and sometimes texts go through easier than phone calls.
I have a collection of ongoing text chains with work colleagues, individual friends, family, etc. 99% of the time, I am VERY aware of who I am texting. There are times when I have multiple text conversations going on simultaneously, so I always double check that I send my husband the heart emoji and not a coworker. My sister is expecting her second child this month, so we've been talking/texting a lot. She also agrees that mom has kinda gotten worse with respect to her mental health. In other words, we do trash talk our mom regarding her behavior. I think y'all kinda see where this is going.
The past few months have been hectic on my end. Work has been a bit stressful, and today I ended up skipping lunch, which was a bad move on my part. I was also in a bad headspace since my private student loans jacked the interest rate on one of my loans (like it went from 9 to over 13% in a month). My parents promised to help me refinance by being cosigners, well they backed out once I received conditional approval (it's one of their little habits).
I get this text asking if my nephew can have my treasured childhood stuffed animal (it was a realistic raptor from the first Jurassic Park, I was a unique child). My dad is helping at my sister's house and watching my nephew when she needs to go to the hospital, and I guess he was just going to bring the toy. The text said that the toy would be given to my nephew saying it's from "Aunt Ida". That is not my name, my nephew is still a toddler, so that's just how he says it. It's actually really cute. My stressed out brain automatically said: "Hey, you're texting your sister". So first I was like uh, sure, but if my nephew decides he doesn't want it, please don't get rid of it. I expressed that I just did not want it to end up at Goodwill or a yard sale. Then I was like "Mom is trying to excommunicate me from the family!" And I receive a confused "What? This is your mother". Wellllll that didn't stop me from texting "mom is just making my life difficult that's all".
THEN it hit me. I was like....oh.....oh no. Like I am a grown ass 36 year old woman, and I dropped my phone on the couch and "hid" in my husband's office. I ultimately texted a "Oh sorry, I was just telling (sister's name) I was frustrated with the cosigner issue" - never heard anything back. It is entirely possible that she misinterpreted my texts. She ingests so much QAnon material, her critical thinking skills have waned terribly. But my mom also has a taste for the theatrics - if she were to disown me, I'm sure I would have received a phone call or a long email outlining how I've been an ungrateful, disrespectful b*tch - which I have been called before.
I guess we'll have to wait and see how this bold strategy works out. As my husband said: "She's hurt you so many times, if she feels hurt from this, tough shit".

Budget (Do not say no budget)? - Up to $250 USD, with wiggle room up to $300 if the perfect pair can be found
Country? - Japan (we have most things here that U.S. does, but there are limitations, i.e. I can't find Audeze Maxwell's at all here)
Platform? - PC/PS5
Motherboard if on pc (or other audio gear)? - Asus Prime Z790-P
Sound Styles: Pick 1, Comp FPS(Open-Back Only), Warm Fps, Music FPS, Fun Gaming, Music Gaming, Gaming Headset(AIO), Wireless Gaming (DON'T SAY more than 1 and don't make up your own)? - Wireless Gaming
Open back or closed back? - Only experience with closed-back, but open to open-back if the perfect pair can be found
----------------------------------------
I've been shopping on this for like a month now, and I just can't find a wireless pair that doesn't have some fatal flaw.
My order of priority:
1) Mic quality + Sidetone 2) Sound quality 3) Comfort 4) Battery life 5) Wireless distance
These will double for conference calls for work, and thus the way I sound across a Teams call is absolutely priority #1 for me. I also cannot live without sidetone that doesn't suck. Everything else is secondary.
In terms of environment, I work with client PCs, upon which I cannot install stuff. So the headset cannot have hard dependencies on some software running on PC. i.e. "Sidetone only works when software XYZ is open." The profiles should ideally be save-able to the headset itself. I don't mind using the software on my own personal PC to set up my profiles, but when I'm mobile on the go, the headset has to function with my preferences regardless of what PC I'm talking on.
I've already evaluated a ton of headphones and I just can't find what I'm looking for:
​

• Audeze Maxwell seemed like the best bet, but alas, I cannot find it *anywhere* in Japan. Not "sold out," like I don't even see product listings for it.
• I love, love, love the sound of the Corsair sets (HS80, Virtuoso) and I was dead-set on that, but two killers here. The mic is so god damn good though that I would be willing to deal with some of the "low quality garbage" aspects if not for the sidetone problem (below):
  • One technical: there is a post on the Corsair forums of people complaining that the sidetone is basically non-existent and unusable. Corsair's responses to these users has been laughably bad, and to this day, it still seems there is no resolution.
  • One non-technical: many, many threads on this sub-reddit talking about how garbage Corsair headsets are in general.
• Razer Blackshark Pro V2 (2023) has an amazing mic, even if this is a bit more "gamery" than I was looking for, and I was really digging the overall cost/value here, until I saw multiple reviews about the sidetone sounding "robotic" and having a constant "hissing" noise in the background.
• The Arctis series (Nova Pro Wireless, etc.) - microphone quality sounds like someone hooked up a garbage can to an amplifier. Some of the worst audio I've ever heard in mic reviews.
• The new Turtle Beach Stealth Pros or possibly the older 700 Gen 2 - there's a bit of stigma about "Turtle Beach quality," but I'm still considering these just on account that I can't find anything else (i.e. above problems).

The forest is black. Pitch black.
I pound over the dirt trail, my feet turning the pedals like twin pistons. The bicycle bounces and jolts, shuddering as it rolls across the wooden bridge. There’s something in the air tonight. A chill.
But it isn’t the chill of autumn. No, this is the chill of unease. It crawls up my spine carrying the deep-rooted knowledge that something about these woods, something about this trail isn’t right. It’s the unmistakable dread of being watched.
Pursued.
I stand up and ride harder. My lungs burn with every push of the pedals but I can’t shake the feeling that I need to get out of these woods fast. The hospital is twenty minutes away. I just need to make it there.
I’m close.
So close.
WOMP
Bass rumbles behind me. It’s followed by a rush of wind, enough to throw me forward while ravishing the forest like a tempest. Trees groan. Their frames break and kneel, surrendering to the gale. Branches and leaves come loose. They ricochet through the air like shrapnel, cutting into my cheek and and I throw up an arm to keep myself from losing an eye.
This is insanity.
It’s lunacy.
I don’t know what’s happening, but I know I have to make it through this. I have to get out of these woods, get back to the hospital to see my sister before the heart monitor flatlines.
She’s not doing well. Are your mother and father home?
No, ma’am.
Can you get here to be with her? She doesn’t have long.
Yes ma’am. No matter what.
The distant bass nears, growing thunderous. It’s as though the whole world is shaking, like the Earth might split in two and swallow me whole. I grit my teeth. I let loose a defiant roar, sweat pouring down my temples as my legs tremble, willing my bike forward.
Faster, dammit!
Faster!
There’s a flash. Then another.
Lightning?
No.
I’m answered by an explosion of light, so violent and bright that I can’t see a damn thing. I holler. Scream. My body jerks forward as my front wheel collides with what feels like a fallen branch. Next thing I know, I’m flying over my handlebars.
What’s the phrase?
Ass-over-tea-kettle.
Yeah, that’s it.
I brace myself for a broken arm, maybe worse, but the pain never comes. Nothing comes. It’s as though I’m floating in limbo, like gravity’s unable to finish what it started. I can’t feel a thing– not the dirt beneath me, not my face pressed against the bark of a tree. For a little while, I think I’m dead. That I’m in purgatory.
But then my eyes adjust. The world comes into focus, beginning as a blurry smudge, but soon becoming a picture-perfect recreation of my worst nightmare.
I’m not in the forest anymore.
I’m above it.
I’m looking down at the mess of trees and I’m terrified at how small they are, how much smaller they’re getting with every passing second.
I’m floating into the sky, being carried by a narrow beam of light.
​
___________________________
​
That was a long time ago. Thirty years, give or take.
A lot’s changed since then, but one thing’s remained the same: the nightmares. I have them every night. I dream about that blinding light, that same low bass and that same gut-churning horror of being eaten by the sky.
I used to think they were a coping mechanism. I figured that since the dreams came shortly after my older sister passed, that maybe they were just how my eleven-year-old brain was dealing with the grief. My therapist seemed to agree.
“You’re quite right that there may be a link there,” she’d tell me, lowering her glasses and offering a medical-grade smile. “It’s very likely that these dreams are a form of abstract healing, a means to allow your mind to come to terms with its trauma.”
For a long time, I thought she was right. Or better put, I hoped she was. Now though? Well, I think maybe we were both wrong.
Shit.
Where are my manners?
I’m over here rambling about my childhood, and you’re wondering who the hell I am.
My name is Isaiah Mitchell. I’m a boogeyman, but not the cool kind. I don’t hide in closets or haunt old houses. I’m the type that your parents rant about while watching the evening news, the sort that tinfoil hats point to whenever things go wrong.
I’m what you might call a Man in Black.
The work I do is classified. It’s the sort of work that happens behind the scenes, with shadowy people in shadowy circles. So when I tell you that last night something catastrophic happened, I’m not talking about the stock market dipping a couple percentage points. I'm not talking about increased traffic on your morning commute.
I’m talking about trouble.
Lots of it.
It’s the kind of trouble that’s making me do something I don’t generally do, which is break rules. By the end of this, I might break all of them. But this is important, and in moments like these I find myself thinking about my late sister, Hope, and how she would have wanted me to do the right thing. It’s how she raised me, after all.
So here goes nothing.
This begins with a story, but it ends with a decision. The story is mine, and the decision is yours. When I’m finished, you get to choose whether you spend the time you have left a little wiser, or laugh this off as the ramblings of a lunatic.
Whatever you choose, I’ll have made my peace.
The story is a personal one. It’s about me, but it’s also about you– it’s about everything in the universe, right down to the last atom, and how all of us are facing a horror the likes of which we can’t begin to imagine.
It’s the story of the worst night of my life, and what might one day be the worst night of yours.
It goes like this.
​
_______________________
​
The beam of light sucks me up and spits me into absolute darkness. The sensory whiplash is enough to give me a headache, something like a migraine that pulses near my temples and feels like a bulldozer inside my skull.
It’s uncomfortable.
But not half as uncomfortable as the situation I’m in.
“Hello?” I mumble to the dark. I stumble to my feet, feeling around my environment blindly. It’s cold. Hard. It feels like I might be in a room full of metal, but I can’t imagine where that would be. A warehouse?
Footsteps echo in the distance. They’re closing in.
“Who’s there?” I sputter, and I think maybe I’ve been drugged. People don’t just up and float into the sky in the middle of the night. It isn’t a thing.
That means I’m hallucinating.
That means whoever kidnapped me knows a thing or two about stealing kids.
That means they’re a professional.
What’s the phrase?
Serial killer.
Yeah, that’s it.
WOOOOMP
I clap my hands to my ears. It’s that same bass from the forest, except now it’s reverberating all around me. Another bass joins it. This one is different… coming from a new direction, with a lower tone. It’s almost like they’re communicating– like morse code.
“Please,” I beg. “Just let me go. I swear I won’t tell anybody!”
Static crackles. It’s followed by a sharp squeal of microphone feedback, then the buzz of modulating frequency. “Communication calibrated,” a digital voice says. “Subject identified: homosapien. Geographic location: New Mexico. Language model: English.”
There’s a pause, it’s long and silent enough that I can hear my pulse rushing through my veins. I’m positive I’m going to die. These things don’t happen to people who live to tell the tale.
“Can you understand us, homosapien?” the voice asks.
Yes, I say.
Can you turn on the lights? I ask.
The only thing worse than being murdered is being murdered in the dark.
Yes, they say.
I’m blinded for the third time in as many minutes. I blink, my eyes adjusting to the green glow as it fills the chamber. Wherever I am, it’s strange. Alien. Tall vats of liquid are scattered around a large, circular room, each hosting tubes that extend outward to a central console. Everything is metallic. I can’t make out any labels– any sort of identification at all.
“Is this level of light sufficient?” another voice asks, this one right behind me.
I wheel around, and my breath catches in my chest. In front of me is something that doesn’t exist– can’t exist. It’s roughly ten feet tall, and it’s got sharp teeth, sharp claws, scaled skin, and a tail. It’s a monster. A living, breathing monster.
Fuck.
I scramble backward. My back collides with one of the vats, and blue liquid sloshes against the glass. “Thehellareyou?” I shout all at once.
“We are the Chosen,” says the first voice, approaching my other side. “We are lifeforms from many galaxies away, and we have come to save humanity.”
They stare at me through giant eyes, and each of those eyes are filled with dozens of pulsing pupils. Almost like ink blots.
“I’ve been abducted…” I sputter, hardly able to breathe. “By aliens. Aliens… are real… and I’ve been abducted…”
“Correct,” says one of the aliens. I realize this one has gray scales, while the other has teal. At least I can tell them apart.
Gray looks at his arm, and a digital screen comes to life. He taps at it with a crooked finger. “Readings indicate heightened levels of cortisol and increased adrenal flow. Source: Fight or flight response. Biologically rational, but devoid of purpose.” He looks at me, cocks his over-large head to the side. “You have neither the option to fight us or flee us, so it would be best to comply. Do you understand?”
My jaw hangs open. I don’t know what to say. I don’t know what to do. Are these aliens really standing there reading me my Miranda Rights? “Are you going to probe me?” I ask. “Like the movies?”
Teal blinks at me, his pupils dilating. “Negative.” He points to a vat. “We will break down your genetic tissue into usable material, harvesting your most compatible DNA strands while discarding the rest. It is for the greater good.”
I follow his finger to the tank, and now that I’m right up against it, I can see clearly what’s floating inside. My stomach twists into a knot. Inside of it is a human body. Everything from the man’s waist down has been dissolved, and what’s left of his intestines are dangling freely.
“Jesus Christ!”
“There is no cause for concern,” Teal says. He lumbers across the chamber to the metallic console that all the tubes are feeding into. “Your disappearance will be accounted for. A clone will be deployed to resume your life, preventing suspicion and avoiding social disruption.”
“Let me get this straight,” I say, trying to ignore how faint I’m starting to feel. “You’re going to kill me… to save humanity?”
“Correct.”
The room spins. My chest gets tight and my vision becomes a scrambled mess. My ears are ringing like church bells. I stumble, losing my sense of equilibrium and I think I taste vomit in my throat.
“No,” I mutter. “This isn’t happening… Can’t be happening…”
I steady myself against a vat, looking up to see a dead woman’s face staring back at me. Pieces of her skull have been eaten away. I can see the wrinkles of her brain underneath.
“Heart rate out of range,” Gray says, but I hardly hear him. He grabs my wrist, presses a device against the center of my hand.
I struggle. Fight. I try to use my teeth, but he’s strong, much stronger than me. A coldness pulses against my palm, almost like an ice cube, and soon that frigid sensation is traveling across my fingertips. Up my arm.
“What did you…” I mutter, but the sensation is rolling through the rest of my body. It’s soothing. My eyes find my palm and I see a strange shape seared into the skin, a scatter of dots surrounding a black square. Suddenly I can’t remember the thought I was trying to finish. Was any of this really worth panicking over?
It was just a few corpses in vats, after all.
“You have been administered a sedative,” Gray explains.
My heart rate slows. My ears stop ringing. The ghost of a smile sneaks across my face.
Gray’s staring at his display. “Cortisol levels reduced. Adrenal response suppressed. Biometric readings indicate subject has achieved a suitable level of suggestibility to proceed.”
“Affirmative,” says Teal, working the console.
I feel like I’m drifting through the lake on a warm summer day. My heart is full. I’m in absolute bliss, and all I can think is that Hope should get to experience this before she dies…
“Pulse is quickening,” Gray says with a frown.
Hope.
My sister.
My dying sister, alone in the hospital wondering why her little brother abandoned her.
“Sedation effect dropping,” Gray says. “98%. 94%. Emotional instability reaching unacceptable levels.”
“Hope,” I sputter, feeling like I’m coming out of a daze. “I have to get to the hospital– please! My sister is sick! She needs me!”
Gray presses the device against my other hand, and another pulse of relaxation courses through me. “Invalid concern,” he tells me. “Clone will be a perfect recreation of you, body and mind. It will retain all memories allowing it to continue your life uninterrupted. Conclusion: your expiring sibling will receive suitable emotional support prior to her decomposition.”
Fucking aliens. It takes everything I have to fight against the sedative, to make my case. “How?” I groan. “How is my DNA supposed to save humanity? What the hell is it saving us from anyway?”
Teal turns from the console to face us. His giant eyes are narrowed in a thoroughly displeased manner. “Invalid request. Information too critical to risk dissemination.”
“Rebuttal,” says Gray. “Clone’s memory can be modified. Current biometric readings indicate high levels of emotional discontent, placing likelihood of a compromised harvest at 34%. Solution: permit subject to understand purpose of sacrifice. Result: sense of closure and enhanced probability of project success.”
Teal turns back to the console. “Rebuttal accepted. Proceed.”
Gray looks at me. He places his scaly fingers against my head, and I squirm a little. “Brace yourself for disorientation,” he tells me. “You will experience physical unease and hyperstimulation. After, you will understand the horror that awaits your species in the dark.”
​
______________________________
​
For a long time, that’s as far as the nightmare gets. Gray prattles on that I’m about to see the truth, some twisted fate that justifies melting humans into sludge, but before he can deliver the goods, I wake up.
Every. Time.
Blue balls doesn’t begin to describe it.
Last night, it happens again. The nightmare, I mean. Same aliens, same tanks of human soup, but this time I wake up in a cold sweat. My phone is ringing on the bedside table. There’s a name on the screen that I hate to see.
“Whatisit?” I grumble.
“Jesus Christ, Mitchell. I’ve been calling for ten minutes!”
My boss. Lisa.
She goes off. The words are coming out like machine-gun fire, and from the background chatter I figure she’s speaking to more than just me. It sounds like there’s a crowd around her, like she’s briefing suits as she jogs down a hallway.
“Got all that?” she asks.
Something about a shitstorm. Something about an F35. The air force just shot down a UAP, which is how we say UFO these days to avoid getting laughed out of the room. Apparently it happened in New Mexico. My backyard.
This calls for a liter of coffee. Maybe two.
I stumble into the kitchen and put a pot on. I have some time while she holds the phone to her chest and barks orders at the drones around her. One cream. One sugar. My spoon clinks against the side of the mug as her voice blares through the speaker.
“Mitchell?” she says. “Still there?”
She says she’s got coordinates. I take a sip of scalding java. I’m dazed enough I barely feel it burn my tongue. My fingers punch the coordinates into my laptop, bringing up the location the supposed UAP was shot down.
I spit my coffee over my screen.
“The fuck?” I mutter, leaning forward and doing a double take at the map.
“What is it?” she’s asking.
“Nothing,” I’m saying.
But it’s a lie. The truth is, the coordinates are a dead match for the forest where I had my waltz with psychosis thirty years ago. They’re the coordinates from my dream. Right down to the rickety old bridge.
I ask her if she’s sure the numbers are correct.
“Am I sure?” she snaps. “Look, if you’re asking me if this is another Chinese spy balloon then the answer is go fuck yourself. I’ve been pulling my hair out for the past twenty minutes. This is the real deal, so suit up and get ready to go. I’ve got a bird on the way.”
The clock on my microwave reads 2:34 a.m. and my stomach is telling me to sort my life out. “Do I have time for breakfast?” I ask.
Click.
The line goes dead.
Twenty minutes later, a helicopter is landing on my lawn. I board it in a daze, and we take off in the direction of the crash like we’re trying to outrun a cruise missile. I’m watching the lights of the countryside drift by, and it occurs to me that from all the way up here, in the dead of night, they almost look like stars.
I wonder how long it’d take to snuff them out.
How long it’d take to burn a whole galaxy to ashes?
To crush a universe in the palm of your hand?
Things to consider.
The closer we get to the crash site, the worse my thoughts become. They’re bordering on obsessive. I’m tangoing with darkness. Radio chatter is coming through the com line, something about aliens and extraterrestrials, but all I’m thinking about is controlling my bladder.
I’m drowning in hypotheticals.
I’m wondering what happens if I lose my mind between here and the crash site, what the protocols are, where they’ll take me. Do I get the night off? The week?
“Everything okay, sir?”
It’s the co-pilot. She’s turning in her seat and looking at me like I’m having a medical emergency.
“You look a bit pale,” she tells me.
My muscles work overtime as I twist my mouth into a smile. “Never better,” I lie. “How far out are we?”
“Twenty miles,” she says with a reassuring grin. She turns back in her seat and I take the opportunity to let out an exhausted sigh.
I close my eyes. Take a dozen deep breaths.
Happy thoughts.
I try to ignore how dry my mouth is, how badly my hands are shaking. I try to ignore the fact that every time I look down at my palms, I see that same scatter of dots, that same faded square that no doctor has been able to explain. “I’ve never seen scars like that,” they tell me. “How’d you get them?”
I don’t know, I tell them.
I don’t know.
But I do.
I’ve known this entire time, probably, but I’ve just been too terrified to accept it. I’m not what I think I am– this world isn’t what I think it is either. It’s all of this that’s making me want to curl into a ball. It’s making me want to weep on the floor, to scream at the top of my lungs and pull my hair out with everything I have.
It’s making me want to throw open the helicopter door, take a breath of fresh air and then plunge head-first into the dirt like a human turnip. And if I thought it was that easy, I might just do it.
But somehow, I know it isn’t.
I know it won’t save me– won’t save us, from what’s coming.
See, last night I had the same dream I’ve had for the last thirty years. The same abduction. The same aliens. But last night, I got to see the director’s cut. The Extended Edition. Last night, when Gray told me he was going to show me just how fucked we all are, he actually came through.
Imagine that.
What I saw was everything.
I saw how all of this ends. How all of it began. What I saw is what’s waiting for us in the black infinity of space. And the more that I think about it, the more I think it might be driving me mad.
“Just up ahead,” says the pilot. “Ten minutes to touch down.”
Eight minutes.
Five.
“Jesus,” he says, at the three minute mark. “Are you two seeing this?”
And up ahead is a plume of smoke, rising into the night sky. There’s the faint flicker of fading fires, the haphazard glow of industrial lighting, and there, at the center of it all, is the unmistakable shape of something that shouldn’t exist.
“That… doesn’t look like it’s from this planet…” the co-pilot mutters over the com line.
“No,” the pilot replies, and his voice is shaking. “It doesn't.”
They’re right. They both are. What it looks like is something extra-terrestrial, something alien. It looks like something ripped straight from my worst nightmares.
And really, that’s just where I wish it had stayed.

I’ve traded all of my coal with my tool and weaponsmith and the meter seems to barely go up at all (especially in comparison to other low-level trades that my other villagers offer). The highest trade I can do with both of them right now is a bell for 36 emeralds. They’re obviously a little bit trickier to level up with since coal and iron aren’t renewable resources. However, buying countless stone hoes and iron axes seems to barely do anything. My armorer also started off with only being able to take coal and is now ahead of everyone else. What is it with these guys?
Do I need to just spend a crapload on bells? Is it even worth it when I levy how much I can get from other villagers with all the emeralds I would be spending on bells? Do these particular villagers just suck? I’ve never leveled up these guys to masters on my own in survival before. For those who have mastered them, please share your tips!

It’s the title. But you guys, this is nothing short of a miracle! I’ve been majorly arachnophobic for my whole life. And I’m in my 40’s, so this is fully-integrated arachnophobia. Not like, “ew, gross,” but more like ‘I’m going to pass out if I see a spider on me.” I did have a traumatic experience when I was stuck in an animal cage whilst upsetting a spiders nest when I was seven. I’ve always attributed to the arachnophobia to this event. No other creepy crawlies really bother me, and I can handle ants, earwigs, centipedes, etc. I even kept bees for awhile. I regularly rescue the salamanders and skinks that get caught in the building. I have a strong stomach, too. Not a sensitive puker around various gross things, even if they smell. But if it’s got eight legs I’m done. Out of there faster than lightning. DO NOT PASS GO. DO NOT COLLECT $200. I have refused to collect my belongings when I moved because they had been stored in the ‘spider shed.’ Even when I got married I told him his only required vows were “to keep my feet warm in bed,” and “kill spiders for me.” I’ve stooped so low as to bribe a child to murder a poor unsuspecting spider, then doubling the bribe if he promised not to tell anyone. There have been times that I have lost hours of sleep because I was afraid of spiders. I have screamed so loud I alarmed the neighbors. I have fallen because I walked into a cobweb.
So yeah, legit arachnophobia.
Anyway, back to the point. I’ve been starting to listen to and work with Hekate lately and trying to figure this all out. What does it mean to be a devotee? How does Hekate impact my everyday life? How do I sustain an actual, two-way relationship with any Deity other than the Christian God I was raised with (and of whom I still have very ambiguous beliefs)? And why does she have to be associated with one of my most disabling fears?I’ve posed questions to her and occasionally get a little insight or inspiration, as she sheds her light on what I need to see about myself. This in itself is pretty dang amazing. I mean, having any additional support is a gift. She has recently shown me that she’s ALWAYS been here with me, nudging me for safety and for growth. She has always been in my corner, as she has big plans for me. She hasn’t brought me this far to only bring me this far.
Because my Doubt and Ego need more than confirmation bias of previous events, they demanded, “But what about NOW, Goddess? How will I REALLY know you’re actually there? What will YOU do to prove that my devotion to you has any impact? Is this even worth my time? Are you real?” And yeah, I probably said it just as bratty as you read it.
A couple of weeks ago I had a spider on me and brushed it off. No biggie. Happens all the time and most people literally do not think twice about something that basic. Not me. I routinely make a scene if a spider lands on me. Full Karen tantrum. Everyone knows TravelingNorth doesn’t do spiders. My alarm bells went off a full second too late. Why did I have to ‘remember’ to be afraid? I realized that the delayed reaction was just a tiny bit of space for me to get in between my flight-or-fight response and my arachnophobia. That second to pause made me question why I’m arachnophobic, then questioning why I’m questioning it. I saw for the first time that this arachnophobia was not actually an aspect of my SELF, but a part that attached to the SELF so long ago it seemed as though it melded to be indistinguishable from the SELF.
Then it dawned on me that it was Hekate who gave me that space. There was absolutely zero doubt that the removal of the arachnophobia was divine inspiration, even if only for a second. When I again doubted that it was Hekate that gave me that precious second of insight, she said in my minds eye, “You’re welcome,” with a smirk.
Unlike the God of Christianity, Hekate cares little whether or not I give her ‘credit.’ (In fact, as I’m writing this she’s telling me, Isn’t that sweet…,” and chuckling like one would do to a toddler.) She really does love me and care for me!
I’ve known for a long time that when I’m in a good mental/physical/spiritual place, spiders don’t bother me as much as when I’m tired or stressed, but it’s always still some degree of fear, never a lack of it. Hekate removed the fear, made me not care about that spider. I have more work to do, but now I’m aware that my phobia is my adversary, not the innocent spiders. I’ve started facing this fear with Hekate’s support. I’ve waved away cobwebs and scooped out a spider that was stuck in water. I’ve bent down close to a spider in her web, but I’m not jumping to pet a tarantula, but I’m no longer panicking just typing the word ’tarantula.’ Miraculous. She convinced me.
TL;DR Not afraid of spiders anymore. Don’t challenge the Goddess. She will call your bluff. Although she will be right, so maybe challenge the Goddess, but only if you’re ready to hold on tight!!!
P. S. (Hekate is reminding me of a message a few months ago when she told me to “BUCKLE UP!” She knew that we were in for a fast, bumpy ride. Ha!)

Someone brought up a MH x MTG Universes Beyond, and this is my main weapon. Thought it'd be fun to bring it into MTG. Thoughts?

I have collected quite a bit of credit cards over the years. They've also gotten me into trouble with debt and has been difficult to manage. I've recently just paid off all my credit cards (with the exception of the Petal One card) and I'm looking to reduce the number of cards I have and to have the best selection of cards to get rewards. This has affected my credit score which I'm looking to work on building.
I travel for work around 2-3x a quarter and would like to travel 2-3x a year for fun (weddings, trips, etc.). So I think a travel card would be cool. Other than that, I'd just like a card with the most perks. I like to go out to eat, nightlife, sporting events, concerts, etc.
​
Any recommendations would be awesome. Thank you!
​

• Current cards:
  • ​

Card	Limit	Date Opened
Apple	$3,700	Nov 2020
Citi Double Cash	$4,000	May 2019
CapOne SavorOne	$3,000	Nov 2019
Discover IT	$2,700	Jan 2018
CapOne QuisksilverOne Cash Rewards	$1,350	Nov 2018
Amex Gold	$1,300 (as of April)	Nov 2021
Petal One	$1,700	Mar 2023
Upgrade Cash Rewards	$2,000	Jan 2018
Store Cards
Sweetwater Card	$1,330	Nov 2021
J Crew Card	$500	Jan 2018

• FICO Score:
  • 640
• Oldest account age:
  • November 2008
• Chase 5/24 status:
  • 1/24
• Income:
  • $157k
• Open to Business Cards:
  • I don't think so
• What's the purpose of your next card?
  • I want the two best cards. Maybe one for Travel and one for cashback
• Do you have any cards you've been looking at?
  • No
• Are you OK with category spending or do you want a general spending card?
  • I think general spending is best for me. Category spending might be too complicated for my use case.