Pediatric nurse practitioner jobs michigan

A patient's ascitic drain was not connected to a bag to drain the fluid for 48 hours after the insertion of the drain. The drain was inserted urgently in IRU to drain the fluid for palliative symptom control. I saw the patient for the first time at the end of the 48 hours of having the drain and she SCREAMED at and scolded me that no one had ever connected the bag to drain despite telling multiple nurses over the last two days. I had to literally control my tears. When I asked the ward coordinator why this has happened, he just simply said he was busy the whole shift(12 hour) and cannot comment on what happened in previous 3 shifts, but only few nurses are trained to connect the bag to the drain. He also mentioned that doctors could have connected the bag to the drain in those previous 3 shifts if urgent. I connected the bag to the drain immediately and the patient said "look now things are getting done after I screamed at you".

1. Why a nurse needs TRAINING to connect the ascitic drain to the bag? I collected the bag to the ascitic drain and no one ever trained me how to do it. I'm surprised to see nurses need training for these basic tasks.
   
2. Is this a doctor's or nurse's responsibility? In the notes there were clear plan from IRU to connect the bag asap on the ward and let it for free drain and doctors kept documenting on the notes to connect the drain to a bag.
   

Let me be the first to welcome you to the MotheOffspring, Nurturing/Support, Teaching/Education Resource Network, or? M.O.N.S.T.E.R. Nursery. My name is Sassy, short for Sasquatch. Yes, THAT sasquatch. Are there other kinds?! I'm a HCC (Healthcare Cryptid) here at the nursery. I also teach humans the survival basics of coming across a baby monster in the woods.
Anyhoo, you're probably wondering why Sasquatch are utilized as Labor and Delivery nurses. It's simple, really. We're natural born mothers. You see, we just love babies! We always have! All of that nonsense about whooping, tree knocking and vocalizations that we do in the woods when you guys are camping? Don't get scared! That's just us shouting out to our boys letting them know we have humans in the woods! Humans could possibly have a BABY with them. Now, I don't like to judge based on looks, but those bald human babies are so ugly? They're cute! Poor little things look like they have mange, though. Who would think a bald puppy is cute? Ew.
I digress. So, when it came to the M.O.N.S.T.E.R. Nursery? We were the natural choice. Even though I happen to be female? History tells us that male nursery nurses happen to have the best bonding with our little devils. Well, little devils and whoever else was born that day. Just look at Chewy over there bonding with that litter of werewolf pups born on the last full moon. He's so maternal? He's practically a breast.
Now, all babies are not created equal. Have you ever wondered which monster's baby is the loudest? I can promise you that you'd rather listen to that werewolf pup litter any day over being 5 minutes late with Baby Siren Head's bottle. I had a headache for a week. When Vlad and Countess Bathory had their little undead bundle of joy last month? You'd be surprised how quick a Bigfoot can prick and milk their finger to get a fresh bottle of nutritious blood for that adorable, pale little parasite. He definitely had a healthy appetite, especially if you were B positive. Vlad and Countess Bathory couldn't have been happier. Patient satisfaction has always been a priority for HCCs (Healthcare Cryptid) since day one! We've never gotten below a 5 on the Jack Link's scale of 0 - 5 jerkies. We are collectively very proud of this fact! It's such an accomplishment for Bigfoot and all of Sasquatch kind.
Okay, I could understand why you think we're a little full of ourselves. I, mean, when Sasquatch are the chosen ones to be the top requested HCC? It's a far fall to the 2nd position. Look, we can't all be God's Chosen Ones. Yes, he exists. Yes, he created us. You're getting distracted, again. We aren't all going to argue semantics on what is Creationism and what is Darwinism and all of that. I'm too busy trying to teach incompetent, um cough cough, INTERESTED humans how to provide the most basic care for any creature's neonates (medical term for newborn) that they might stumble across while enjoying hiking, camping, fishing, etc. The priority? The newborn. Additional concerns?
1) MotheFather finding humans around newborn and attacking them.
2) Humans treating the scenario like an episode of "Jack Ass" and thinking it's a good idea to "mess with" the newborn and? Again? Mom/Dad attacks them.
3) Basically? A human breathing will set Mom/Dad off. Most creatures just don't want humans around. They can't be trusted. Sorry, Guys. It's been that way every since you refused to credit Chewy in the '67 Patterson–Gimlin film.
So? Your first reaction, if you see a baby creature? Look for it's parents. If you see them? Run. Run fast. Like, put Forrest Gump to shame kinda runnin'. Those parents don't want you there for any reason at all. Pick 'em up and put 'em down the whole way back down the trail.
If you don't see the parents? Proceed slowly and with caution. Now, don't let everything I've said scare you into not helping a baby monster. They're babies, after all. Please, check on them. Just be aware of your surroundings so as not to frighten the wood creatures which will, in turn, attack you. Then? It's just a bad day for everyone involved.
So? Depending on the woodland creature? You'll want to know what action you need to take to help the baby and? Hopefully? Survive assisting. The first thing you'll want to do is call out/whistle, whatever you have to do to try to get someone's attention. Look around and listen. What do you see and hear? If it's nothing? Again, proceed with caution. If you hear howling, growling, tree knocking, whooping, any of these things? Leave, either their parents are still around or we're there and will then takeover. I know. It's confusing to try to tell when we're tree knocking hoping you have a baby with you or if we know there's a baby around and we don't want you around the baby. Really, if at all possible, just don't mess with the babies if you don't have to. With that having been said? Let's proceed!
As you cautiously approach? Keep making noise letting everyone know you're there. We don't want to scare the life, or afterlife, out of these little ones. They're at their most vulnerable right now. Let's use Chewy's patients today as an example. You traipse along and stumble over a werewolf den. Well, that's not something you see every day. You hear soft whimpering. About 4 or 5 little werewolf pup heads pop up out of the den. How's everyone looking? Is anyone hurt? No? Then check your supplies. It just so happens you were successful fishing earlier. Werewolf pups love fish almost as much as moonbathing and cutting their baby teeth on a human femur. They'll be thankful, the Alpha male and female will be thankful and you'll really be thankful. You get to walk away, karma and limbs intact.
Next? It would be highly likely that you'd come across a wendigo, skinwalker, rake slenderman, etc. besides just a litter of werewolf pups. Try to prepare yourself as much as possible for these encounters. The better prepared? The better off everyone will be. The best part? These creatures won't want your everlasting soul in infancy. Those challenges don't present until adolescence. So? Enjoy the respite for the moment. Now? No matter what the situation? You'll always want to approach with caution and announce your arrival. It's saved not only many a human? It's saved a lot of cryptids as well. Try to have some sort of food item on you that's rather filling. You'd prefer that over them making YOU the food item.
So, as we proceed down the trail, there's a cabin to the left and it's the last house but do not enter, please. The last good hearted Samaritan did and, well, let's just say he had a run in with a girl locked in the cellar who wasn't quite herself. That's probably about the most PC way of explaining demonic possession. Anyhoo, there was bad press for a year and visitors to the park fell off, it just was a big mess. They ended up doing some kind of cybernetic enhancement and now the good Samaritan has a chainsaw for an arm. He's done a great job keeping them all in line. Overall? That was one we got right.
Since I brought up Vlad and the Countess Bathory's bouncing little bundle of bloodsucker? It's important to know that if you are in your domicile, and R.V.'s count, vampires cannot enter without an invitation from you. So, if you are camping in your R.V. and someone comes knocking late at night? Don't answer. If they aren't a vampire? They can come back the next day. If they don't come back? You definitely made the right decision. Now, the problem is? If you encounter a vampire in the wild. Hopefully? They've already set their sights on whoever they picked that night to be their victim. If not? A dropper of Holy Water as perfume on either side of your neck is a nice deterrent. Again, if the little count is there by himself? He's clearly gotten away from the castle. He needs returned immediately. Go to the nearest tree that displays a "break in case of emergency" box. Break the glass, take the bag of beef jerky out, shake it. Every Sasquatch in a 5 mile radius will come running to you. Point the baby vampire out and we'll be glad to take it from there.
Something I should bring up to our do-gooders ready to risk it all: if you can't swim? Don't try to help aquatic creatures. It won't end well. It never does. Little fry just aren't acclimated to landlubbers. Merpups are tough for even us to handle. They get scared, you can't swim, bad things happen. So? If you're determined to help any baby monster no matter where they reside? Take swimming lessons. You'll thank me. Trust me on this.
Don't let the fae trip you up, either. They're mischievous. They'll also try to sneak a changeling in on you if you do bring your human babies to the forest. If you respect walking around fairy rings and respect mother nature? The fae shouldn't be an issue. If you don't? Well, you were warned.
So, what have we not covered? Flying creatures. Yes, they present a challenge even we Sasquatch find difficult. It's hard to assess the needs of a baby that's wrapped in the arms of a mother flying 75 feet above your head. Even though the task is daunting? It's a challenge we'll definitely take on. We just watch and wait for Mom to go on the hunt and we take a peak at that tiny little velociraptor in that nest, with it's mouth hanging wide open, just awaiting a morsel. Now, the Mothman's baby was an experience. Cocoons are just something you have to see for yourself, especially when they're 6 feet tall. It's truly fascinating!
I think that covers everything for today's lesson. Bear in mind, we're beginning the summer season here in the U.S. Encounters are going to increase between cryptids and humans so be aware and care when it comes to our babies. We're aware and care when it comes to yours. Stay safe and Sasquatch on!

Note: This is part 2 to Shiloh's Final Battle
Gomez and Tish pulled into their driveway and heard barking. They'd gotten a German Shepherd pup when Guillermo Del Toro's "The Strain" was on T.V. As a joke, but also because they loved the character? They named him Thomas Eichhorst after the Nazi vampire who was one of Guillermo Del Toro's most powerful villains ever created. No one put much thought into the name choice considering they loved all things horror. "What the hell has Eichhorst going off? He knows it's us!" Gomez couldn't understand why he'd bark at the 2 people he NEVER barks at. "I can honestly say I'm not even surprised after this day." Tish exhaled and proceeded to get out of the car. Eichhorst continued the call of his people. "IKE! EICHHORST! KNOCK IT THE HELL OFF!" Gomez yelled so Eichhorst could hear because he was behind the chain link fence in the backyard. He acted like he didn't hear a word. As they got closer to the house? They noticed Eichhorst was not barking at them. He was barking at the woods BEHIND them. "He sees something we don't." Tish matter-of-factly stated. She & Gomez simultaneously turned to look into the woods. Nothing. No noise. Nothing was there. Eichhorst stopped barking as soon as they turned towards the woods. Everything stopped. "What the hell is going on, Cara Mia?" Gomez was starting to experience what Tish had all day long. "I don't know, Mon Cher. I just know I don't like it." Tish continued glancing into the trees. "Probably time to sit back and relax. You've had a bad day that ended a rough week. It's time to just chill." As if knowing what Gomez had just said? His city issued phone started ringing. "NO. ABSOLUTELY not! I'm off tonight! What is so critical that Gomer & Goober can't handle it?" Gomez could feel his blood pressure start to rise. "Find out what it is 1st, Craig, before you go into a meltdown." Tish always called him Craig when she was irritated. "Hello?!" Gomez did a poor job hiding his inconvenience. "Man, it's Ol Shiloh! You gotta get over here, Gomez. It's bad! It's so bad!" Bubba was inconsolable. He was on the verge of tears. "Whoa, slow down, Bubba. What happened?" Gomez tried bringing levity. "We came by to check on him when we were on patrol. He was in the doorway, he was..." Bubba finally started crying. He hated it. The last thing he wanted to do was cry in front of his co-workers. He just simply could not process what the hell they'd rolled up on. "Wait? Ol Shiloh is hurt?" Gomez was trying to process what Bubba was saying. Tish's brow furrowed. She didn't like what she was hearing. "I mean, if you consider hurt dead with his fuckin' throat ripped out to his spinal cord? Then? Yeah, he's hurt." Bubba's anger at his own insecurities was boiling over onto Gomez. "Look, Bubba. Clearly you guys have been going through something over there. I'm headed that way. For future reference? Don't take your shit out on me. I didn't do anything to you." Gomez scolded. "Sorry, Gomez. It's just so..." and Bubba broke down further. Gomez hopped back into the car. "What's going on? Who was that? Don? Bubba?" Tish was concerned. "Hop in the passenger's side if you want to find out. I have to go." Gomez started the engine. Tish walked around and got in.
They pulled into Shiloh's driveway behind the Eerie, Indiana patrol car. Bubba came running out to greet them. "Don is in there with him. The paramedics just got here a few minutes ago." Bubba proceeded to catch Gomez up. He and Tish had been so busy looking at Bubba and the patrol car they didn't notice the bus parked to the side of the house ready to pick up Ol Shiloh.
Tish & Gomez entered the threshold where Ol Shiloh laid on his back, staring at the ceiling. His throat. Jesus, his throat. It was gone. They both were rocking back on their heels.
"We thought it was a big cat attack. It's not. Those bite marks on his throat? That's human not feline." Kennedy was an intelligent little bastard. Arrogant, condescending and holier-than-thou, but very intelligent. Not only would he inform all of the insubordinates around him about everything they didn't know? He'd do it with one hell of a cocky attitude. Ah, Kennedy, and his unsolicited lessons. Time to sit up and listen in class. ..
"When he opened the door? We thought it was an animal attack. Instead? He must've been attacked by humans. The bite marks definitely indicate human but the vicious nature of how deep the wounds went indicate something much more powerful. This was to his spinal cord." Kennedy didn't look like he knew-it-all. He looked perplexed.
"But how could a human bite that deep?" Gomez asked.
"I don't know. I honestly don't know." Kennedy was lost for the 1st time since becoming a paramedic 7 years ago. He'd never seen trauma of this caliber. He hadn't even seen this level of brutality and he'd rolled up on gang fights.
Don and Bubba were both on the front porch, looking in, mouths agape. Gomer & Goober indeed.
Kennedy loaded up Ol Shiloh's body with the assistance of a new EMT that Gomez was fairly certain Kennedy was banging. I mean, he was a total Chad so why wouldn't he?
Don put the camera away in the trunk of the patrol car. At least he had the presence of mind to get the pictures taken before emergency services hit the scene. This was going to rock Eerie, Indiana's foundation. Murder hadn't happened here in anyone's lifetime so this was a "big city" problem they weren't use to dealing with. Nosey people, scared kids, idiot media, this was not what Eerie needed right now. It certainly wasn't what he needed. He had enough of Allie putting out for anyone that would buy her a 6 pack or some cigarettes. Had he known he could've gotten off so cheaply? He sure as hell wouldn't have married her. Unfortunately, for his dumb ass? He actually fell in love with her. Why? He didn't know. Self esteem was never his strong suit. So? After dating 6 months, her only cheating 3 times, then getting pregnant with his baby? He made the perilous decision to try to make an honest woman out of her. Don sincerely doubted if Allie had ever been honest about anything in her life. Coincidentally? When they came back from their Honeymoon 2 weeks later? She'd miscarried. Well, she claimed she miscarried. Don never saw a pregnancy test nor would he have been 💯% sure the baby was his. He would've actually suspected the baby was not. Looking at all of it now, how did he not see it sooner?
"Get to those pics, ASAP Rocky, Don!" Gomez instructed. "Please, don't be an embarrassing Gen Xer who thinks he's so cool and up to date on all of the current lingo. They laugh at us only a little less than Boomers." Tish was still trying to get a handle on all of this and his Goofy antics weren't really in need right now.
The woods to the side of Ol Shiloh's place was the same as the woods to the back of Gomez & Tish's driveway. Eichhorst couldn't understand why his humans didn't acknowledge his bark. He never barked. He especially never barked at his humans. Why did they think he had? Didn't they see the kids in the woods? The little boy? The little girl? How could they not? As far away as the kids were? They smelled funny. He didn't understand. It was the same smell in the air that he sensed right before thunderstorms began and he hid under Gomez and Tish's bed. Humans don't smell like that. It's impossible to explain ozone to a German Shepherd.
The children watched as Ol Shiloh was loaded onto the ambulance and taken away. The couple were getting into their car and the deputies were already headed down the driveway.
"It has began." The dark-haired pale little girl spoke. "Indeed. It has. Let's see what Venerate has in store for the humans now." The boy replied and they headed towards town.
Eerie, Indiana was like any other Midwest, small town. You had your good ol boys & jerks. You had freaks and geeks. You had Bible thumpers and always humpers. Allie Hoff was the "always humpers" category. No one nor nothing could change that. The girl went through life bartering sex and blow jobs for anything she needed. It was a pitiful existence and she knew it. Unfortunately? She never learned and didn't know another way. With Eerie being so small? She was limited to the same "favor givers" over and over, again. Never any new blood. Never any fresh meat. It really stifled what few prospects she had. She looked up from where she was slumped over the bar, in her barstool, nursing a bottle of beer. She happened to look up to the front door. Who was that? She'd never seen him in here before. He was about 6'3" with dark wavy hair and ocean blue eyes. His skin was sun kissed and the muscles showcased the entire package. Wait. WTF? This dude doesn't belong here. Who the hell is he?
He appeared to glide and almost float towards her. He gestured to the empty bar stool next to her. "Is this seat taken?" He smiled with almost glowing white teeth. She locked up. Wait? He wants to sit next to me?
She just shook her head no because she was too shocked to speak. "Hi, I'm Vinny." He extended his hand and his gleaming smile never faltered. "Allie." She finally squeaked out. Guys like this didn't talk to girls like her. "Nice to meet you, Allie." Vinny swung around and attempted to get the bartender's attention. "I'll have a Jack & Coke. For the lady?" Vinny slyly smiled at Allie and she was entranced. "Same" was all Allie could say. He paid for their drinks and handed Allie hers. "I've never seen you before." Allie just finally came out with it. "No, I'm new to the area. You wouldn't have seen me around here." Vinny replied. "Oh? New from where?" Allie was trying to proceed with caution. She did not want to miss out on the opportunity that was this gorgeous specimen of a man. "You've never heard of it, trust me. No one ever has." Vinny still held his smile. "I'd still like to know." Allie returned a smile that was nowhere near as beautiful as Vinny's. "Maybe when we get to know each other better." Vinny conceded. "Oh? So we're going to be getting to know each other better, are we?" Allie coyly pressed. "If I have any say in it? Most definitely." Vinny winked. Damn. That boy was so fine she'd drink his bathwater if he peed in it. He was the perfect vision of the perfect man. It was as if he were tailor made just for Allie. How, though? How could she actually meet her real life Manic Pixie Dream boy? The one she'd dreamed about when she was a little girl. The one who laughed at everything she said. Listened attentively. The one who only had eyes for her no matter how many "rich bitch" girls were around. She'd treat him like a postage stamp. She'd lick every square inch of him and go back for 2nds on the important parts. "Allie, you strike me as a very straightforward girl." Vinny snapped her out of her daze. "I am. No bullshit." Allie replied. "Then? Allow me to be straightforward by telling you that I want to fuck you senseless." Vinny casually stated as if someone asked him for the time. "Well, that is certainly straightforward." Allie was stunned. She wasn't so stunned that she'd let an opportunity like this pass her by. She'd made up her mind that was going to happen as soon as she saw him. "And your answer?" Vinny inquired. "Anywhere. Any place. Any time Any day." Allie assured. With that? They stood from their barstools and headed outside. He even smelled good but not a typical smell. It was like the air at the beginning of a thunderstorm. He smelled like ozone. Ozone??? Was that even possible?
Gomez and Tish got home and plopped on the couch. Eichhorst came through the doggy door and trotted straight to Tish. "I've got leftovers, Piggy. Give me a sec." Tish opened her container from the restaurant. Eichhorst sat patiently waiting for his command.
"What a fuckin' day." Gomez exhaled exhaustedly. "Yeah. It has been. Poor Ol Shiloh. This is just too much." Tish's head continued to try to find rationality where there was one. "I'm getting in the shower and going to bed. You need anything?" Gomez slowly rose up from the couch, joints popping like a glow stick. "No. I'm probably gonna watch a movie and go to bed after." Tish answered. "Horror?" Gomez queried. "What else?" Tish smiled albeit a tired one. Eichhorst jumped up next to her on the couch and laid on her like a lap dog.
Vinny was walking Allie into their local little flop hotel room. It wasn't like she wasn't familiar with the place. The staff referred to her as "Frequent flier". She didn't particularly like the insensitive moniker but couldn't deny its accuracy, either. He closed the door behind them in one failed swoop. This was a practiced talent she noticed. Didn't matter. He was hers tonight.
"Make yourself comfortable." Vinny gestured to the only bed in the room. Allie took a seat. She looked up at him and noticed the ozone smell becoming stronger. Weird. He smelled good but she had never known someone to smell like a thunderstorm.
"I'm going to step into the bathroom for just a minute. I'll be right out." Vinny stepped into their adjacent bathroom. She heard loud music and laughter from somewhere down the hall but couldn't quite place where. It was for the best. Allie had always been, well, vocal. Normally? If a guy is hitting it right? She hit the vocal range of 2 stray cats screwing. She couldn't help it. She was like this every since puberty. It was all the girl thought about. She figured she was probably a nympho although she was never officially diagnosed. She couldn't hear what he was doing. It didn't matter. It wasn't going to affect her and what she was doing. She walked to the curtains and made sure they were completely closed. Although they were, why did she feel like she was being watched? She stripped down with the efficiency of a HazMat worker decontaminating. She heard the bathroom door opening. She kept her back turned so she could make the surprise last as long as possible. Was this the night? The night she could finally reach sexual satisfaction? Was this the dick that was going to change her life? There was a soft green glow coming from the bathroom. Must be a nightlight? She hadn't noticed before. Was it getting brighter? It looked like it was coming towards her. Was it Vinny? Maybe he's videoing me? Not like I'd care, but he could have asked. "Are you recording me?" She asked as she continued to look towards the window. His breathing was different. It seemed labored and, well, wet. It didn't sound like he did earlier, that was for sure. "You okay?" Allie asked. His breathing was raspier, louder, wetter. She decided to bail on her romantic idea of not turning around before he reached her. She turned around and her playful nature and smile fell away immediately.
Her brain couldn't process what her eyes were seeing. It couldn't be real. God knows along with banging any guy she could get her hands on, she used to hit hard drugs back in the day. This had to be a flashback. It had to be a "Fear and Loathing in Las Vegas" scenario. This? This "Mars Attacks!" bullshit right here? This is not reality.
It's bulbous head was transparent. It looked like a barrel eye fish that she saw on a nature show she used to blaze and chill to. That also explained the soft green glow. It sounded like and looked aquatic. That's where the wet sounds were coming from. It kept advancing. It had a white upper torso with arms and webbed fingers on each hand. What sent her over the edge? From the waist down? It was a human male. All the important parts and in working condition. How? She had no idea. But? When she meant working condition? It was working it's way right towards her. Wait, this thing is going to still have sex with me?! No. Absolutely not. "No. Stop." Allie feebly tried to resist. It did no good. Allie didn't know she was the reason he was even here. This was the whole gameplan all along. It was never a casual hook up.
Venerate had studied numerous different civilizations but Terrestrials always fascinated him. They were so primitive but also entertaining. The Alliance had tried many different hybrid trials between themselves and Terrestrials. They never made it out of infancy. There was a weakness that need strengthened in their own DNA to combine with humans. They worked on it until their resolution was Venerate himself. He has the best of what their kind has to offer with the malleable adaptivity to change himself into anything he needs to to be able to convince Terrestrials to trust him. It worked. Ol Shiloh thought Venerate was his deceased wife. Allie thought he was her dream man. He needs a human to impregnate. Beggars can't be choosers. It worked out perfectly. Allie took one look at his bulbous transparent head, his lower nontransparent stiff head and proceeded to pass out on the bed. It didn't matter. Venerate didn't need her awake to begin their hybrid breeding program. And? Begin the program he did. Everything was coming to fruition via the Alliance's vision. All of their hard work finally got them here. The pale, dark-haired children stood outside the hotel room window, peaking through the crack in the curtain. They were able to relay the mission a success with Venerate making first, second and third contact. Once the younglings come forth? The Alliance can begin occupation and what a glorious day that will truly be! Everything was going so perfectly. This just had to be fool proof. They walked off into the night, smiling so much those obsidian eyes even looked less demonic. This was the beginning of prosperity. This was the beginning of the end of humanity.
The Windows to the Soul: Allie's Assimilation
END

Long story short, I qualified as a paramedic in 2013 and worked up the ladder to senior RRV mentor. I left a UK trust for GP surgery work (home visits and acute clinic as ANP role) when my daughter was born for social hours and clinical development. I got these and then a job came up to work as an AP (advanced practitioner) with a different trust. I’ve taken the job which involves 999 work (focussed mainly on low acuity), GP home visits and telephone advice for road crews and 111.
I’ve been out the ambulance game for 4 years with my first shift on Thursday working as solo RRV on the AP car. I’m just worried about getting THAT job that I’d felt happy with 4 years ago, but not so confident about now.
Is there any tips or advice from others that have had similar experience as I’m equally terrified and excited.
Thanks! ☺️
Note: Also I’ve just finished the trust induction (mainly aimed at NQPs) with a day of ALS/PALS/PHTLS refresher.

(You’re welcome to give advice) So my grandma (mother’s side) is 70 yrs old and she’s had arthritis that progressed into some other type of disease, and since her bones are so fragile she had already broken one of her hip bones and had it replaced which cost a fortune. Later she broke another bone in her leg and for the past 6 months she’s been in bed like a damn vegetable. My mom has to care for her, she goes to her house 2 times a day to change her diaper and honestly it’s just awful.
My grandma has become unbearable and it seems like she doesn’t want to do absolutely anything to get hersel out of bed and at least be able to stand/sit on her own. Because of her behavior my mom’s constantly super nervous and easily irritated, which affects our relationship.
Overall this situation made our lives harder because now we can’t even leave the city to go somewhere like a vacation which my mom really wants. She can’t even get a job because there’s no jobs available with the exact schedule my mom has. I suggested sending grandma to a nursing home and of course my mom snapped at me, somewhat understandable + we don’t have proper nursing homes in our country where the staff will actually care for her.
There’s no progress whatsoever, she is in the same state as she was in 6 months ago and it’s truly unbearable. I really started to dislike my grandma and honestly, I want her to die. That would be way less problematic that trying to keep alive a fucking vegetable that whines all day about how useless she is and ruins my mom’s health and nerves.
Every time I see angel numbers I make a wish for grandma to recover, but deep down I think that I want her to die because realistically, I don’t think there will be any progress at all and her dying would be for the best. Sometimes I even think about praying to God for her to die and end all of ours suffering including her, since for the past 6 months our prayers of healing her do not seem to be answered.

extremely new to reddit. sorry. just really need a place to talk. this will probably be long.
10 years ago i lost my dad to stomach cancer. they found it very late so he died very quickly after being diagnosed. he chose hospice so i was there every part of the way to watch him die. i was 13 and it really messed me up. i still have unresolved trauma from it.
since then, i have suffered from very persistent and extreme depression and anxiety, and some ptsd. it obviously impacted my formative teenage years intensely negatively. i struggled with serious suicidal thoughts all through high school. since graduating in 2017, it slowly got less severe, but depending on life events could easily come back full force.
for the better part of this past decade i attempted to receive help through therapy, psychiatry, and many, many prescription medications. i have throughly exhausted these tools that i was lucky enough to receive thanks to my caring mother. however, it was never enough. i do not feel that with this help there was ever any noteworthy improvement. i have not been to therapy for over a year and i have not taken any medication for two. i do not intend to seek further help in either form.
the reason i have come here to talk now though is not because of any of this. about two months ago now, my mother died of cancer too. it wasn’t like my father’s. it was a much more torturous and cruel experience for my family and i in how slow and debilitating it was. she was first diagnosed with liposarcoma a few years ago. it’s a very rare form of cancer in which there is very little to do in way of treatment. she underwent a successful surgery to remove a huge tumor. the nurses and doctor admitted it was a miracle she survived. she was cancer free for a couple years, but another tumor formed. she needed surgery again, but she suffered a lot more from the ordeal this time. they removed a kidney and some muscle. she was much weaker afterwards. but still she fought to be healthier, so it wouldn’t come back. less than a year later, it came back anyway. too big a tumor for surgery in her current physical state. she was forced to choose between chemotherapy to attempt to shrink the tumor, or live like normal as long as she could until it killed her. she chose to take a chance with chemo. it ruined her. she couldn’t complete the full treatment plan. it wasn’t even working in the first place. she couldn’t undergo surgery. all that was left was for her to die. and just like my father i watched her rot. i watched as her body and mind failed her. an impossibly cruel fate for someone so beautiful and kind and loving. she deserved a much better life than what she got. and that is putting it egregiously lightly.
because of my mental state i made my mother suffer through my youth. i’m the youngest of four children so she already worried about me the most. i amplified her anxiety tenfold. at times i was cruel to her due to my struggles with anger management. i am not satisfied with my relationship with my mother. i always wanted to be much, much better for her. but the reality is that i’m not. i tried to step up past my limits for her during her final months, but i’m kidding myself if i thought even for a moment it could make up for the years of pain and disrespect i inflicted upon her. i always have and always will hate myself for it.
i was not ready to lose my mother, and i mean that in multiple ways. due to my extensive depression i spent almost all my days up until maybe 2021 doing absolutely nothing but finding distractions from reality. my life was consumed by pastimes like video games and anime. because of this, i have few life skills. my mother had immeasurable knowledge and talent. yet i never took the time to learn anything from her. i relied on her for much, much more than i ever realized. i moved out almost a year ago to rent a place with a couple of my very good friends. i work a minimum wage job because i dropped out of community college after 2 years. i can barely take care of myself. i make only enough money for rent and utilities. i can’t afford food. thus far my mom was helping me pay for extra things and if i’m lucky my roommates will buy me food but now that she’s dead i’m totally on my own with supporting myself and it’s just starting to hit me when i paid my credit card bill and have next to nothing left.
i have a very wonderful boyfriend. we’ve been dating for 2 years. he is genuinely perfect and has changed my life. up to this point we have shared the kind of love you think is fake or only exists in books and movies. i thought i would be able to survive my mother’s passing with his support. for a time i did. we are long distance but he came to visit right after she died. he stayed with me for more than a month and even though my loss was painful i still thought things would be okay because i want to share a future with him. however, since he left and since i’ve returned to work, i have felt my mental state rapidly decline. it is to the point i fear i’m straining our relationship. he is desperately trying to help, but his words don’t seem to comfort me anymore.
i cry every night now. even on nights where i’m too hopeless or numb to cry, i cry in my dreams. i have never, ever been at this low a point in my life. not even losing my father left me like this. my friends have all been laughably removed from my suffering. my two roommates who i considered my closest friends are so far removed from this that neither of them even spared a typical “sorry for your loss” when she died. it disgusts me. everyone in my friend group either has never lost a loved one, or has such a terrible relationship with their parent(s) that they couldn’t even imagine what it feels like to love a parent, let alone lose one. which means the lack of empathy is utterly horrendous and intolerable. even sympathy can be too much to ask from these people on this topic.
all of that is to say i am isolated in my own purgatory. i feel nothing anymore but anger and disgust. hobbies and pastimes i used to enjoy that would have helped me in the past mean nothing to me anymore. my suffering is amplified by the fact that i have been mildly lashing out at my boyfriend, the one person in my life right now who has been actively listening to me and caring for me through the entire unfiltered experience of watching my mother die. i reward his patience and positivity with contempt or blatant disregard in favor of misery. at times i am angry with him simply because i see him as an obstacle preventing me from killing myself. because if he wasn’t in my life, i 100% would be dead right now. and every day that i survive amplifies my desire for suicide just a bit more. i don’t know how long this will go on. it’s starting to affect my memory, because i feel like i can’t even remember the things about my boyfriend that make me happy. when i try to remember anything specific about us i can’t focus on it. nothing is there. i can’t remove myself from this numbness and it infuriates me. i don’t want to self sabotage this relationship but i’m afraid i can’t stop it from happening.
i guess a tldr would be hey i have watched both of my parents die from cancer and it has given me insurmountable trauma, i truly lack emotion now but i struggle with killing myself cuz there is a small sense of self that still worries about my godsend boyfriend. i just don’t know what i want from life anymore

I hope everyone reading this has a nice day.
This has mentions of pain, hospitals and everything connected with hospitals, also mentions of low self esteem/sel
Some backstory before i start venting: I've been hospitalized since last Wednesday night, and theres no known discharge date yet. I've been in pain for the entire stay, there was maybe a singular hour the entire time that was pain free.
I've been alone with my thoughts a lot while here, and its really just destroying me from the inside. Whenever nurses come in and i notice shifts in their tone or irritation, i cant help but feel like its my fault. I rarely ask for pain medication because i dont want to feel like a burden, eventhough i know that its okay and its their job to help me.
My sisters are out of state, my dad is at work and the friends that have visited me are also busy as far as i know.
I've also woken up today with the worst level of pain since being hospitalized after visiting the ER, and have cried non stop since 7am. I dont know what to do, I'm not allowed to walk or leave my room because of my health, no one has visited me today, no one is calling, no ones texting me. I refuse to text or call anyone, i dont want to annoy them or seem like I want attention. I really just crave some type of distraction, otherwise I feel like I'll suffocate from all of this.

Location Flair: United States, Michigan
Recently at work, I’ve been working towards a lead position that would help manage daily problems and support team members. It would basically be like a manager position but without the 1on1’s and dealing with peoples personal issues. That being said, there’s definitely an aspect to it that requires soft skills and building relationships with members of the team.
I’ve never been this person, but I wanted to make more money so I figured it would be a good opportunity while I’m working towards my degree. I’ve put in a ton of preparation work including job shadows, obtaining a letter of recommendation, doing a mock interview, speaking with the managers and members of leadership about the position and how I think it’s a good fit for me at this stage in my career, and doing several interviews. I’ve now made it to the final stage of the interview process. I mostly lied along the way, telling them I’ve been growing towards this role and that I’m ready for something new, and this role seems perfect given my career trajectory. I do love helping people, so it’s not 100% lies, but I enjoy being an individual contributor more. I think I’m great at it and not so much being a people person.
Long story short, I got a promotion last week that puts me at the same job grade level as the position I was working toward. At this point, the only reason I would choose the job over my current promotion is because I like the job itself more and has nothing to do with money. Having a 2 year old, going back to school, and moving soon (same city), makes trying something new at work daunting. The job itself will add more stress to my life as I’m dealing with other peoples problems consistently.
I’m 99% sure I won’t take the job at this point, but I still have the interview scheduled. I feel guilt regarding all the work I’ve done and help I’ve gotten thus far applying for the job. What do I tell the people who have helped me, specifically the person who wrote the letter of recommendation? Do I still go forward with the interviews, knowing that I won’t accept the job if offered?
I’m fairly sure I will get offered the job as I’m a front runner in the process. My reputation at work is great, and I don’t want to ruin it. I think most people will not hold it against me, but it’s still something I think about. I don’t want to appear “flaky”. I’ve told my current manager about this, and he thinks I should still go forward with the interviews for the experience. However, I feel odd going forward with it when I know I’m no longer interested.
TLDR: interviewing for a job I no longer want - do I still do the interview?

I’m a new grad who started in the PCU/ICU in February. I graduated from college near home in December and moved about 1500 miles away in February to start my job.
To be frank, I’m miserable. I like my coworkers and my manager; my orientation was fantastic; I feel supported in my learning. But despite all those positives, I have panic attacks before work almost every shift. I cry every single day. I struggle to make it through my shifts without crying. I feel like I’m just going through the motions and feel very little passion, which is a significant change from how I felt in nursing school.
I was also in a bad car accident on the 24th which left me with ankle and chest wall injuries. I can’t afford to miss anymore work, and my last two shifts since returning have been very painful and difficult.
I desperately want to move back home. I don’t have a contract at my job, fortunately, but I worry I wouldn’t be able to get a job elsewhere with only 4 months of experience. I would also hate to quit so soon on my coworkers, who really are wonderful. I’m at a complete loss. Any advice would be greatly appreciated.

So my job is working with kids and one was sent to the hospital, he’s physically alright. So one of us gets assigned to come here for 12 hour shifts, it’s also and hour and a half drive and we get paid for that too…
Anyways he somehow sneakily tied the earlier staffs hands to the bed so now we have to sit in the hall…
I’m sitting hear and right behind me I hear a nurse talking to someone I’m not eavesdropping but I hear bits, “she wasn’t on chemo anymore… came in yesterday at 4:45… was going to be moved to hospice…” I’m not thinking anything of it just wasting time on my phone. Awhile later two male nurses are behind me, I hear giggling, I hear a lot of noise like plastic. Then I hear “you get the toe” followed by a really really long zipper noise. “I don’t think it’ll be too heavy”
I see them come buy and put a gown and sheets in the hazard bin…
Few minutes later they come back with one of those morgue tables…
I tried to look away… I know she was bagged, but I just don’t deal with death well. I stay out of funerals. I am just sitting here I dunno, heart pacing though… 3-4 more hours…
Edit: I just want to add, because after posting I felt it came off cold, I feel for the families loss, and I feel for her, there was no one here with her when she went. I should t be uncomfortable about it but it does.

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I am starting my first job this monday as a “new grad nurse”. I say it in quotations because I graduated may of 2022, definitely feel super rusty but I had a university that provided us with plenty of clinical opportunities (over 1k hours). It’s been a long time so I’m super nervous but also a bit excited. Just want to know how it was when you were new grads, did they seem annoyed when asked questions? how much did they expect you to know? things like that. i’m in med tele by the way. THANK U NURSES LOVE U ALL!!!

I'm an author, but I need a day job to take care of myself while I pursue my novels; I write fantasy and sci-fi-I do copywriting as a freelancer. It has enabled me to have an excellent schedule, and I make enough to work for myself; I've been so privileged in that I can travel the world and work wherever I want, and I can focus on honing my skill as a writer to write better short stories and novels. I've been extremely grateful for the life I live, but lately; It's a dream that's starting to fade away into nothing. I've had multiple clients discontinue my services these past few weeks because they are "just gonna use AI bro."
I'm worried about my future, previously I was a nurse, the thought of going back to that fills me with a sense of dread. I had to deal with so much crap, and me being a male; a patient once falsely accused me of sexual harassment. Thankfully, a female nurse was with me so she said I was innocent and the case was dropped, but after that I started planning my exit from the field. Not to mention I can't stand doing physical work for so many hours, AI has affected my mental health and I'm deteriorating super fast. Not to mention I'm worried about my future as an author with all the AI writing tools out right now, and the technology will only get better as the years go on. Pandora's box is opening, and It's not going to close again.
I sometimes think of throwing myself off the Eiffel Tower, or how it would be nice if a car hit me while I was crossing the road. Look at all the books popular on tiktok right now, they require no depth; it would be super easy to create with AI and it would saturate the market. It's going to be a world where corporations have a monopoly on art, fiction is dying; to be frank the whole reason I want to live on this Earth is for stories. Stories are the most beautiful thing that humans can create Imo, all stories are gonna be created by robots soon. It will be an age with no human connection, just companies filling your feed with robot generated content with no life to it. God I wish I was dead.

I may be young, or maybe just stupid. Yet I do know that this is love, and it’s something that won’t go away.
I fell in love with this guy after skipping a good 10 minutes of a class, it was physical education of last year, I went back to the class because I laid in the nurses office just staring at the ceiling thinking: “am I really this pathetic?”, I told myself, “from today on, I will try, and try and try.” I then went outside, to the field, we were doing a softball unit. My friend and him were partners and i joined them and we played together. That’s the first time I ever really met him, he was new, and he was introduced to me by my other very close friend who ended up getting us together.
Flashfoward, it’s four days before my birthday and something tells me to look for something, he had done stuff before but what I saw in his phone broke my heart completely. He sexualized many other women in the span of our relationship, and called people “hot and cute”, he would speak to all of his exes flirtatiously. These were all my SET, and KNOWN boundaries. It broke my heart completely. He said he’d change, he didn’t. I found another ex he was speaking to. He ruined my ability to trust.
Over time, he did change. But the things he said, the things he did, they replay in my mind and it’s created me to become a terrible, envious human being. I’m untrusting. We’re almost a year into our relationship and I still do look at him with utter adoration. I look forward to see him everyday, and I’m getting my first job and I can’t wait to spend my money on him, and watch his face light up. I love seeing that. His face lighting up and him being happy. I wish I could spend every minute of everyday with this guy. I just wish I could magically forget what he did.

Hi all I am new to the sub and have a burning question regarding how honest I should be with my doctor. TLDR: I have a big nose and am trying to take advantage of my insurance. Should i tell my doctor?
Context I’m a lady who has a really big nose… I am really beautiful regardless and my nose suits me yada yada… I get nose filler to diminish the large hump on my nose and recently went to a new doctor for this (due to his experience on face balancing). Well, this doctor asked if i had a deviated septum, to which I said “a small one i think” (based on prior knowledge from visiting 2 plastic surgeons regarding my nose). This Doctor then proceeded to exam my face and stuck two q-tips up my nose opening my nasals to show me how i am suppose to breathe. I was in shock and didn’t realize how poor my breathing was. This Doctor then told me that my ‘nose bone’ is in the shape of an ‘S’ as well as telling me that i have an over growth of cartilage in the bulbous of my nose. This doctor recommended i go see a plastic surgeon named Dr. XYZ. I began noticing how gosh awful my breathing truly is and spoke to my personal practitioner telling him about what this doctor has told me and so my practitioner referred me to a nose/ears/throat doctor. The objective of the referral is to get me on the road to a septoplasty and/or deviated septum repair (covered by insurance). My main concern is I have taken what doctor #1 has told me to heart. I want a reduction on the bulbous of my nose as well as a shaved nasal bone- for aesthetic purposes though.
I understand I am taking advantage of the so called ‘system’ but the first time I wanted a nose job was when i was 3 years old.
I have always been the family favourite due to my “middle eastern nose”.
I have been teased my whole life, i would look in the mirror at age 6-8 and just cry asking the universe why me. in high school the popular boys use to say “she’d be so hot if she had a nose job”. I don’t know how many people know or care to know, but nose insecurities are linked to eating disorders and I currently weigh 93 pounds at age 27, my bmi is shameful.
I don’t mean to sound condescending and everyone is beautiful and unique but i feel so held back in life because of my nose. As awful as it is, i envy those woman that honour their prominent noses and look so strikingly beautiful. I wish they felt how ugly and disgusting i feel which is so wrong and horrible to say but i’ve been stuck in a loop of sadness and self pity since I was born.
I apologize for sounding condescending and vain, I apologize for victimizing myself and not being able to love this beautiful face of mine. my boyfriend has a big ol dominant nose and i’ve never seen anything sexier, but i just can’t live with mine. He loves mine, everyone does, it’s what makes me unique they say but i hate it.
On to my question, When i have the privilege of speaking to the Nose/Throat and Ear doctor should I honestly tell him my intentions? Should I truthfully tell him I would rather mouth breathe my whole life than to be stuck with this horrendous nose of mine? Should i tell him the personal information like how i have social anxiety and can’t look people in the eyes because my nose haunts me? Should I tell him I don’t even want kids because how dare I give them my big ugly nose? should i tell him that i want a deviated septum recovery in hopes that i come out of it “more beautiful”. I hate myself foe the words i have said abs the question I asked but I need help, i’ve tried to end my time here because of my nose twice now and i don’t want to have false hope going into this surgery just to be disappointed after the fact. (i understand 100% that i will never like or love my nose, before or after any surgery, i am aware that it will never be ‘small enough’ in my eyes, i know that this body dysmorphia that i will live with for the rest of my life)
I just need to know, if you were a doctor, would you help me if i shared this with you? would you go the extra mile to approve my appearance? would it be strictly for functionality of my nose?

I’ve been on antidepressants for several months. Started Zoloft 6 months ago then after 2.5 months tapered onto Viibryd. Was first on medications in high school, got off after a year, then hadn’t taken any for years until now.
1.5 months ago everything changed. I figured it was the Viibryd finally kicking in. I thought “wow this is it. This is my moment”. I was sleeping 8 hours a night at about 12-1am daily, waking up at about 8-9 am. I was showering daily. Shaving regularly. Brushing my teeth night and day, clipping my nails.
My thoughts were faster, like if the tar in my brain was removed. I was talking faster. I was dying to interact with people (have social anxiety)- though I needed a haircut and couldn’t afford one during that time so I didn’t do this, but I seriously wanted to. I was doing things quicker. I was smarter. I felt more like ”me” than I’ve felt in so long.
I was also working out 6 days a week.
And the craziest part? None of that was hard. Again… none of that was hard. I just did it.
After about 2 weeks that started ending. I didn’t want to accept it but yeah, it did. Im not depressed again but I haven’t been showering much, brushing my teeth at night, haven’t shaved in weeks, etc. And my mood is just different, I don’t have the same level of hopefulness or “hyped-up ness” that I had during that 2 weeks.
I’ve had periods like that before and it always ends. In a way I’m happy I had that period of time because I guess it shows I’m not completely worthless - I actually am somehow capable of being more functional at least during stints of time- but it always ends, LITERALLY AFTER 2 WEEKS - 1 MONTH MAX
Idk what to do. I feel like I’m wasting my time with therapy because I am literally back to not doing shit again. During those 2 weeks my 3-month old therapist said she was proud of me and that I made an “astronomical amount” of progress, just like my previous therapist from 4 months ago (not my choice to switch) when I had a shorter “good” period, though that time I don’t think I was sleeping much. Btw, that therapist literally said I was one of their best patients in terms of the effort I put in and the progress I made, they didn’t see me long enough to see me fumble again and I had only been seeing them for 2 months prior so they didn’t get to see that this is kind of a pattern for me.
In terms of meds I mean I was actually depressed before getting on the meds so they are not doing nothing considering they helped me get out of that. And sometimes my anxiety seems better.
I don’t really know what to do at this point, I’m 21 and it’s simply not getting better despite what everyone says. Been having some dark thoughts about an old coping mechanism I used to use, but I’ve been able to control myself. And my sleep lately has been really bad (always hard for me to maintain) I’m having some mood swings recently and have been pretty irritable / not wanting to talk to my fam during a lot of the day though during that 2 weeks I was eager to talk.
Look I see a nurse practitioner for meds and a therapist yet I’m still doing shitty, so I really could use any advice. I really don’t know what to do. Should I try seeing an actual psychiatrist instead of a nurse practitioner or something? Do you think trying shrooms might be a good idea?
Edit: also I am still exercising just less than during those 2 weeks. Weightlifting at home , yoga, and some cardio. Actually about to exercise now

I may be young, or maybe just stupid. Yet I do know that this is love, and it’s something that won’t go away.
I fell in love with this guy after skipping a good 10 minutes of a class, it was physical education of last year, I went back to the class because I laid in the nurses office just staring at the ceiling thinking: “am I really this pathetic?”, I told myself, “from today on, I will try, and try and try.” I then went outside, to the field, we were doing a softball unit. My friend and him were partners and i joined them and we played together. That’s the first time I ever really met him, he was new, and he was introduced to me by my other very close friend who ended up getting us together.
Flashfoward, it’s four days before my birthday and something tells me to look for something, he had done stuff before but what I saw in his phone broke my heart completely. He sexualized many other women in the span of our relationship, and called people “hot and cute”, he would speak to all of his exes flirtatiously. These were all my SET, and KNOWN boundaries. It broke my heart completely. He said he’d change, he didn’t. I found another ex he was speaking to. He ruined my ability to trust.
Over time, he did change. But the things he said, the things he did, they replay in my mind and it’s created me to become a terrible, envious human being. I’m untrusting. We’re almost a year into our relationship and I still do look at him with utter adoration. I look forward to see him everyday, and I’m getting my first job and I can’t wait to spend my money on him, and watch his face light up. I love seeing that. His face lighting up and him being happy. I wish I could spend every minute of everyday with this guy. I just wish I could magically forget what he did.