Amber naked and afraid

So my anxiety has convinced me that something bad will happen to me because I've been stress eating whole bags of Swedish fish almost everyday. It isn't the only thing I eat but I've noticed that everyday I wake up and I feel off balanced(?). I can't really describe the feeling, it isn't quite dizziness, but maybe vertigo. Regardless, I've been feeling off and I'm afraid that maybe it's because of all the sugar in the Swedish fish. It could also be anxiety because I don't really sleep well at night but I'm not sure anymore. But I am freaking out right now.

I'm 30 and I just feel so lost. I don't know what to do with my life. I would really appreciate some advice. I live in Southern California.
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So I have a BA in Psychology. Afterwards, I took 2 years off to get more research experience before going into an MA/PhD program for Social Psychology. I got into an MA/PhD program but I dropped out after 2 years because I really did not enjoy it. Psychology was what I wanted to do since I was 12. So I just feel really lost.
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Ever since then, I've been working in customer service. Last year I was diagnosed with ADHD which at least made me understand why I had struggled with so many things in my life, from getting to places on time to organizing things. In October, I was fired because I kept being 5-10 minutes late (and yes, I disclosed my ADHD diagnosis when I got it, thinking it would make it easier-- it did not). My current medication does help now with focus and organization, but not so much with being on time though.
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I've since moved in with my mom in a smaller city, but despite applying to jobs daily, I still have not been able to find a job.
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All these things made me realize that I need to find a new career and a job that I can do remotely- where it would be much harder to be late than to go in person and where I can manage my environment (my old job did not allow people to have noise canceling headphones in, I need the noise canceling headphones to focus plus fluorescent lights distract me).
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I enjoy filling out paperwork, and repetitive tasks, and I did not hate programming when I had to learn some when I was in grad school. I hate large meetings where nothing discussed is relevant to my job and I hate being interrupted with small talk when I am working (another reason why working remotely is something that I want to pursue). I would prefer a job where I would just have to work to complete short tasks. I did love data analysis in grad school but I am not quite sure what I can do with it. In any case, I'm more introverted. I would prefer a job with the least amount of human interaction unless they are 1-1 meetings. I'm ok with 1-1 meetings.
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My mom is suggesting that I go into HR- get a certificate and try to find a job in HR. There are a lot of things that are appealing to me about it-- that it can include paperwork, 1-1 meetings, and that it is somewhat related to my BA in Psychology. But I don't know what kind of certificate to get (there are a lot of types out there), or if I can succeed. Any ideas about how to switch to a job in HR?
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I have also been considering cybersecurity mostly because there is a free apprenticeship through a local community college but I don't know if cybersecurity is a good choice. I don't know if I would be good at it. In any case, classes don't start until August. I enrolled in the college but I can't yet sign up for any classes or contact an adviser. In any case, that community college also offers an HR certificate, but again, it will take me a few more days before I can talk to anyone in that college.
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Do you have any advice? Are there any other careers I should consider? What certificate would be best for HR? How can I know if I would be good at Cybersecurity? I am very afraid of making the wrong choice like I did with Psychology. I'm old. I need to settle down and have a career. I feel so lost.
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Anyone with ADHD, any suggestions for careers I should look into?

Where do you think the line should be drawn between admiring female beauty and the sin of lust?
I think one can go to an art museum for example and see naked women in paintings and sculptures and appreciate their beauty without crossing any lines. But there's a clear distinction for most people when we talk about a different medium...
Photography. Whether it's still or moving pictures (videos) suddenly there's almost complete agreement that all nudity in this form is pornography. I disagree. Some photos and videos containing nudity can be matter-of-fact like in an educational context, artistic or completely non sexual depictions of reality like the nudity of the prisoners in Schindler's List.

My dad is my absolute best friend and my rock. He’s the first person I call when I’m having a bad day or in an emergency or just to talk. We talk every day.
He was always so successful. A business man. The smartest guy I know. He has a nice, big house.
But for some reason I can’t understand, he hangs out with drug addicts. My dad is very anti-drug. He doesn’t even like taking Tylenol. But every time I go visit, he has a house full of people who are obviously on drugs.
I went into my childhood bedroom today to grab something and noticed I had rings missing out of my jewelry box. Nothing fancy, they were just cheap Claire’s rings. But the thought of someone going into my bedroom and digging through stuff pisses me off. There was also a Polaroid picture of my mom and dad missing. Like who the fuck would steal that?
He knows the stuff is gone but doesn’t know who took it. I’m taking my bedroom set from there and bringing it to my house and I’m so afraid someone’s been sleeping in it. I’m afraid someone’s been in there smoking it up or something.
I just don’t understand why he hangs out with people like this. I’m worried he’s going to end up getting into trouble. Someone’s going to steal from him and he’s going to end up shooting them or something.
Just why??
No judgment to addicts because I was once an addict. But I know how they are.

i (18M) live with my mother. my father left me more than a decade ago and refuses to talk to us. because of this, my mom has been a single mother. she worked in retail and car shops, she even did sex work on the side to help financially. because of this, i have felt very ashamed of my mother and refuse to talk about her careers with my friends at school.
my mom is also a huge party animal; she takes me to parties hosted by friends and family, then stays there all night. the older i get, the more im sick of her. shes also very wary of who i interact with in school, since we live in a very drug-happy urban area, which is annoying because she works in the sex industry and doesnt have much room to talk.
finally, my dad recently tried to reach out to me and my mother, because apparently he felt guilty. my mother completely cut him off and told him to go fuck himself then hung out. we got into an argument because i called her immature and not even considering my side on the matter. then she tried gaslighting me, telling me she loves me and doesnt want me to be hurt by him.
i snapped telling her she ruined my life by being a slut, shes the reason i dont have friends, and i despise her and wish she wasnt my mother. she ended up crying.
we didnt talk to eachother days after that much. because of this, i was able to ask a girl out to the dance. we were already texting on the phone and talking a bit, but my mom told me to be careful so i felt too afraid to ask her out. as me and this girl were talking, i explained the entire situation with my mother, it wasnt until i explained what i told my mom that she got mad at me. she said i was an AH for speaking to my mother like that, and she is reconsidering going with me.
i dont know what it is with chicks and defending shit like your own mother being a sex worker and ruining your life. now because of my mom once more, i lost a date to the dance.
AITA for telling my mother that i despise her?

Hi. I had my sister print me some grates to place in my tea infuser. I bought these 1L pitchers that have a pocket inside for you to put coffee beans or tea leaves or whatever. Realized eventually instead of dealing with the mess of having to empty and clean that every time, I can just throw six teabags in the pitcher and get the same result. Problem is, they float on the top so I wanted them to be pushed down into the water to ensure all the bag is submerged.
So I drilled a hole in the cap and ran a stainless steel bolt down and bolted her tool. It's a circle about 2.75" wide with a bunch of holes to allow water to pass but not the bags:
https://i.imgur.com/QHY0Rb6.png
Works great. But we were concerned about food safety. I read you can use alcohol to sterilize, then let it air dry and store in a sealed container. I was thinking; why not just leave it in a tub of alcohol? But then I was afraid maybe the alcohol will eat the plastic. Will it? Does the percentage matter? I have them right now in a tub of 91% to sterilize.
We bought some epoxy to coat the discs, but she had second thoughts about whether or not she bought the right thing. Will this work to make them food safe:
https://i.imgur.com/iYpAm3N.png
? Thanks!

I notice many movies portray pole arm weapons such as pikes, naginitas, guandaos, halberds, and spears as being a very easy weapon to use. You just hold the spear,pike, or whatever pole weapon and wait for the enemy to stupidly run into it.
The best example is the Stirling Battle Scene in Bravhart where William Wallace's soldiers awaited for the English Heavy Cavalry to charge at the Scots. The Scots merely placed large wooden stakes on the ground and angled it at the English Horses and they were slaughtered as they charged into it. So many other movies with troops using spears as their primary weapon portrays using spears in a similar fashion. You hold it and form whole wall of spears and just wait for your enemies to stupidly run into it and die.
Even after the initial charge, using the pole arms to kill is portrayed simply as pushing it to the next guy in front of you, wait for that guy to be impaled and fall, then hit the next guy in line with it and repeat. 300 shows this perfectly. Watch the video.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VeK-d553Mjk
As you seen in the clip, the Spartan decimated the Persians with a tactic so simple. Simply push the spear into the next guy in front of you in line after the initial charge and push the spear into him killing him like he's a human shape cardboard stand that you see in stores and he falls to the ground. Waits for the next Persian in role to appear and they suddenly push the spear into the next guy and kill him and keep repeating until an entire Persian unit was decimated.
Spear battles are often protrayed as this in movies once the initial moment where enemies rush into spears with no regard for their own lives and get impaled like barbecue on a hot fourth of July. Push your spear like your enemy is n inflated baloon and you will kill them by the hundreds.
So its portrayed as so long as you don't lose your balance and remaining holding it pointed at your enemy on the defensive, you simply stay where you are and let your enemy charge you and the killing commences as you pull the spear and push it towards the next marching troops in line at the front row after the initial charge was stopped by your spears.
Even martial art movies portrays spears int he same manner. Often the master martial artist awaits for his gang of enemies to run at him and suddenly he starts killing hordes of men with simple pushes of the spear as the come nearby with a fancy trick from staff fighting thrown in every 3rd or fourth bad guy.
However I remember a martial arts documentary in which some guys were in Japan trying to learn how to use the naginata. The weapon was heavier than many martial arts movie portrays them as. In addition the martial artist teaching them showed them just how clumsy using the weapon was if you are untrained as he made them hit some stationary objects.
The martial artist even made the guests spar with him and he showed them just how goddamn easy it was to deflect and parry thrusts from a naginata and he showed them just how vulnerable they were once a single thrust was parried. He also showed that not just naginata but also yari spears, Japanese lances, and such pole weapons were very easy to disarmed if you weren't train.
So I am wondering after seeing this documentary. Movies show spears as being such simple weapons anyone can use them while being on the defensive against a charging army as I stated in my description above. But the Martial Artist int he documentary really makes me wonder how hard it is to simply just stand there and wait for your enemies to charge into your spear and also how simplistic it was to push your spear into new men repeatedly.
Was using a spear-like weapon much harder than movies portray and require a lot of training like the martial arts documentary I saw show?
Would a spear wall formation be enough to kill raging vikings or naked Celts as long as you stand your ground patiently and wait for them to rush into the wall? Or is physical conditioning and actual training with the weapon required?

So I intend to start estrogen very soon, hopefully in the next 2-3 weeks. I temporarily live on my own for a summer internship that’s about an hour and a half from my hometown, and after the internship ends I’ll be moving back into my parents house.
My parents are relatively progressive people for their age, but I told my mom I’m nonbinary several months ago and since then I’ve been getting the typical treatment (basically she’s been insinuating I’m masculine more often than before I came out, calling me a man, telling me to stop shaving my arms and saying that it’s weird, telling me to cut my hair, etc).
I’m not worried about my physical safety at all, but her comments cause me a lot of anxiety (having an anxiety disorder doesn’t help) and I don’t have a very open relationship with her in order to feel comfortable talking about these things. She doesn’t know the extent of how transfem I really am, she probably doesn’t even realize nonbinary is a trans identity.
She’s made similar uncomfortable comments about one of my trans friends, even though she still supports them. Her mentality is sort of like “trans people are real and don’t deserve hate, but there aren’t very many, they’re kinda weird, and my kids would never turn out be trans.” It very much comes from a place of ignorance and not hate, and I really wish she would’ve taken the time to learn more since I came out but she just hasn’t. I had a feeling she wouldn’t take me seriously based on what she said when I came out, and that’s what ended up happening.
Anyways, do you guys think I should re-come out to my parents before I start estrogen? Or if I wait to talk about it again, how long should I wait? With my body type and genetics it’s very likely I’ll end up with noticeable breasts fairly quickly, and I don’t know if I’d be able to hide it for very long. And I guess part of the reason I’m afraid to come out before starting estrogen is that I don’t want their comments to scare me out of it and I want them to take me seriously.

I feel like the weight of the world is crushing me right now and I hate having to post this. But like the title says, I no longer want to financially support my mother and it's one of the most painful things I've had to endure.
My mother worked in healthcare for about 40 years. Made pretty decent money as far as I'm concerned. My mother has always been very emotionally unstable (in many ways she's a spitting image of me, which is why I'm all the more worried) and frequently lash out/yell/scream and demand. Our personalities are very similar, and we've gotten into some pretty nasty, unforgivable arguments in the past.
But even though she was making (to my knowledge) fairly good money, she was also battling a gambling addiction of nearly 30+ years. It started when she was young and it only got worse as time went on. I've been financially supporting my mother now off/on for about 10 years. My finances are fine.... as I'm still living at home (I live at my dad's, and he's mostly oblivious to the situation as we've never told him. However, he has always known to some extent known my mother had a gambling problem).
About a year ago, my mother pulled me aside and confessed that she had a serious gambling problem and was in recovery. To some extent, I already knew this... but what I DIDN'T know was that she had spent ALL of her parent's inheritance. All of it, gone. Ever since, she has been scrambling to get her life back on track. Credit cards, maxed out. I helped her with lawyer fees to declare bankruptcy as well. This did not set me back financially (as again, I'm still living at home) but this would have been a monumental living hell if I was.
My mother also has numerous physical ailments and is pushing 70. She works part-time at a hospital and she is still always in need of money. I feel scared, hopeless and afraid. Not to mention, I'm the only child so the burden feels even more crushing.
I want to move out, hell I probably need to move out at this point (I'm in my mid 20's) but I'm terrified of what is going to happen to my mother. I can't keep doing this in 10 years. Right now I'm the least bit interested in starting a family of my own but I know that can change. I make OK money, but eventually I want to move out of this city and find a job elsewhere.
Her rent is absolutely ridiculous and we're trying to find her a cheaper place. Knowing that she has a bankruptcy tag above her name is going to be a laborious process.
My heart aches for mom.... she's had a very difficult childhood, but I have literally no idea what I can do about any of this. I know there is some obvious parentification going on here but I just can't seem to let go. Only real solution I have is to just let my dad handle it, whenever I actually move away and get on with my life.
AITA for not wanting to financially support my mom anymore?

My mom has been taking care of my grandparents for the last year and a half. Her mother, my grandmother, is very verbally abusive. My mom is exhausted and overwhelmed from taking care of them while also having a full-time job, but she refuses to steps away from any of it because she is afraid of getting jailed for elder abuse. Also my grandmother refuses to hire a caretaker.
What counts as elder abuse? How can my mom stop enabling my grandmother? She is clearly not happy, and I can't stand to watch her continue to put herself through this.

I’ve been with my company for nine years. During that time, I’ve only ever received their annual raises which every employee receives which is 3%.
Today I had my annual review and it went really well. After the review was over, I decided to send my supervisor an email that’s been sitting in my drafts for a year. It was an email where I inquired about getting a raise.
I sent the email at 2pm today and by the time I had to clock out at 5pm, I got nothing back. No, “thanks, I’ll look into it” nothing.
It’s now 9pm and I’m a nervous wreck. I’ve never asked for a raise from a job in my life. I believe I have imposter syndrome so I often times feel like I’m doing a horrible job and my employer just feels bad for me so they keep me.
After asking for this raise, I’m afraid this will be the last straw and they’ll tell me to take a hike.
My friends told me the worst that will happen is they will just say no. Is this true?

This post is meant to find something for me to watch, and also to recommend my favourites to anyone looking for something to watch
Here is my top rated horror ( or horror-ish) movies on IMDB
-10/10-
-mother!
-Midsommar
-Im thinking of ending things
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-9/10-
- Pearl
- Men
-You Wont Be Alone
- Titane
- Bram Stoker Dracula
- Climax
- Hereditary
- Beau is Afraid
- The wailing
- Parasite
- Love Exposure (not horror , just a honorable mention)
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-8/10-
- Soft And Quiet
- Sissy
- Sick
- Watcher
- Nope
- We need to talk about kevin
- US
- Rent a Pal
- One cut of the dead
- X
- It follows
- The Thing (1982)
- Suspiria (2018)
- In the mouth of madness
- Empty Man
- Night of the living dead
- Noroi
- It (original and remake)
- Dawb of the dead
- Shaun of the dead
- Gerald's Game
- Lake Mungo
- I saw the Devil
- Tag
- Why dont you play in hell
- Tokyo Gore Police
- Train to busan
- Rec
- The Witch
- Neon Demon
- Coherence
- The Endless
- Spring
- In Fabric
- November (2017)
- Black Swan
- Noriko's Dinner Table
- Malignant
- Night House
- Last night in soho
- The feast
- The Innocents
- Impetigore
- We need to talk about kevin
- Scream movies
- Lake Mungo
- The shining
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-7/10-
- Ginger Snaps
- A tale of two sisters
- Bodies Bodies Bodies
- The Sadness
- Hellbender
- The Sadness
- Deadstream
- All my friends are dead
- The lodge
- Blood Punch
- In the Vast of night
- The Void
- The Medium
- The Perfection
- I am a Hero
- Saint Maud
- Excision
- Thelma
- 28 days later
- Doctor sleep
- As above so below
- Under the silver lake
- Pontypool
- Evil dead (2013)
- Why dont you just die
- Vicious Fun
- Candy Land
- The Dark and The wicked
- A dark song
- Anything for jackson
- Saint Maud
- Lasty shift
- Call (2020)
- Triangle
- The Invisible Man
- Pyewacket
- Kill list

So something happened to me irl about a month ago, it hasn't been fully resolved and like a week ago I felt it got worse. I haven't felt the same since and I feel its making me feel worse.
I've been hearing about people taking mental health breaks but the answers are usually very general and or vague.
Because I trust this sub, I kinda want to ask this question here.
EDIT For more context, this is what I'm feeling. I honestly don't feel that sociable irl or online. I don't feel like I'm good company either. I make questionable decisions mostly because I'm afraid of losing more people, alone, lonely etc.
I've told some people here most I no longer talk to what's bothering me so I don't want to talk about the specifics anymore because it took so much out of me to say what it was in the first place.

Pardon me but I really don't know and I am too afraid to ask in other sub.
I am not personally exciting about that since the armor doesn't look that good and the roll is pretty bad. Why do people keep attacking Bungie about this?

Help, i've been having some mental health issues for a while and it basically made it impossible for me to go out without getting extremely anxious (i even threw up a few times) and because of it i haven't really had any contact with anyone since i was 14, i dropped out of school and basically never left the house, i'm 17 now and i'm trying to get better but my social skills are straight up shit, i don't know how to connect with people in real life and I'm extremely afraid of being alone forever, i mean if my skills at making friends are so shit how will I ever date, i feel like i'll be alone forever and it's a deeply depressing thought i can't get rid off

So, I am a guy who has been cheated on in the past and had trouble overcoming that past trauma and trusting people again. However not long ago I met my friend who I treasure a lot as I always feel extremely happy whenever I am with her or just talk to her in messages. However, I am now slowly noticing that I text her every 20 or so minutes and feel extremely sad when I am not with her. When I see that she is not participating in the conversation as much or acting a bit indifferent, I feel horrible. But despite that, as soon as I am with her, I feel happier than ever before. At this point, I am becoming "addicted" to her and can't stop thinking about her. I consider her really important to me, but fear that me acting like this could lead to her leaving me or something along those lines. I have now been pondering whether to reduce my time with her or if there is any other way to overcome this situation. I am also extremely afraid of losing her, even more than losing my ex at the time.

I have a 4 month old puppy (pit mutt/ female) and I am afraid I am raising her to have separation anxiety. I have had her for a month now. I work from home and live in a studio. During work hours, I crate her from 9-11am and 1-4pm. I have dedicated all my free time including lunch breaks and weekends to her. I even have my groceries delivered to try to spend as much time with her. The only time I leave the house is to go to the gym around 7:45-9:15pm, 5 times a week. I put up an indoor camera to watch her and she does okay but after an hour she starts freaking out. I take her on walks 3 times a day, use her kibble as training, provide her enrichment toys or DIYs, leave the house and return without making it a big deal, and i even leave her with a chew toy/ kong with peanut butter when I leave!! I am doing everything I have read to keep her tame while I am gone but she still freaks out after such a short period of time. Im getting to the point where I cant even enjoy going to the gym because I freak out. Is this normal? Should I continue to wait it out? Or what am I doing wrong or failing to do?

Hi, David here!
It's almost always better to ask someone out as soon as you know that you are interested in them.
If you keep putting it off for weeks and months, then you are only further hurting your chances of being successful.
A woman wants a confident man who is not afraid to ask her out. The confidence itself being the very thing that contributes most to a man's attractiveness. A woman can often detect that you like her, so any hesitance or fear to make a move detracts from your image.
In addition, the more 'secretly' infatuated and invested that you become in a person, the harder it will be for you to act confidently and normal around them. Again detracting from your chances of being successful.
If your interest in someone gets to the point where asking them out feels like a big confession of love moment, then in most cases it is not going to end well.
The best time to act was yesterday, the next best time is today.
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Adding to that, I just finished putting together my dating eBook "How to Date Any Girl" version 4.0 and would LOVE to get some honest feedback from you!
I decided to give it away for free for the first 100 people who join my mailing list.
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By joining the mailing list You would get:
- 27 pages long eBook (free for subscribing) that gives you a practical step-by-step solution to meeting women (14+ years of knowledge put into it).
- bonus emails where I share awesome advice on how to improve your dating life.
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You can get the eBook and join the list by clicking here!
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This book is the result of going out and socializing with girls for over a decade. I have put in there all the fundamentals I have learned over that time so you know I have something to say ;)
P.S: You can unsubscribe at any time with a click of a button if you feel you don't like the content of the emails anymore (but I am sure you will ;)
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What are your thoughts? Do you have any tips to add?
Let's discuss in the comments :)
Thanks for reading and have a GREAT day!
Coach David

Good evening beautiful people, I want to practice tonight but to be completely honest…I’m tired. Not like I need sleep but my soul feels tired. I’ve tried a couple different self care ideas both the “getting the hard sh*t done to better my life” and the “floofy curl up in my robe with a book and cup of tea while gentle music plays in the background” and I’m still down. (How’s that for a run-on sentence 😜) I want to practice and make sigils and spell jars and a good luck charm for my sister and niece but I’m afraid they will be tainted with my bad energy. I’ve even tried reiki treatments from fellow practitioners because doing it to myself just doesn’t feel “clean”. Any advice or personal experience with this is much appreciated. 🖤