What does boutique mean on poshmark

This has spoilers for the PigFest tourny, but this fight went so well I had to do more analysis on the specifics of what happened since I'm struggling with mid / lategame TvP engagements. I'm writing this mostly for myself but thought it might help some others:
In this TvP Clem vs MaxPax https://www.twitch.tv/videos/1769517231?t=4h5m17s, Clem's in a bit of an all in position since he didn't make a 3rd base, but the army values are extremely similar (possibly Clem w/ a slight disadvantage due to reinforcement time). Clem still won the fight in an extremely convincing fashion, even when MaxPax had one of the scariest Protoss armies (Colossus, chargelot, disruptor, blink stalker, sentry), and on top of that he was standing on top of two shield batteries w/ overcharge available
Some main take aways that I think are really interesting to note:

• Clem doesn't stim until the very last bit of the engagement, even when a disruptor shot went to zone him
  • He first engages with all of his army to get enough viking shots off to force a battery overcharge, and only after the shield battery ends does he stim for the first time
  • Even though he doesn't stim, he still keeps dancing at the very edge of the range that start the engagement
• Clem keeps all of his bio and his vikings grouped up, and even controls them together in multiple parts of the fight
  • This is in contrast to some other pros that keep the vikings on a separate hotkey and sometimes send them in first, by keeping them together all the time he's preventing MaxPax from blinking under the vikings
  • Since he keeps dancing at the very edge of starting a fight, the vikings get to poke a lot more since they have such long range
  • When the vikings did get to shoot, he specifically only pulled his bio back to kite out of range of the colossus to pull them forward, and this also allows for zealots to be picked off easier since whenever they charge they can't be pulled back as easily as bio.
  • Because Clem keeps dancing in and out, MaxPax feels pressured to use his disruptor shots to try and get large shots off

TL;DR: Dance all day

I used to suffer from TERRIBLE fatigue. I'm talking if i was in Wal Mart, I could happily pass out on the cold, dirty, tile floor. Wouldn't even think about it. Anywhere I went, I was always tired. In school (way past that age, now), I was always falling asleep everywhere, never wanted to go to gym class, never wanted to be active. So, yeah. Had no idea really what it was, but I was just tired ALL_THE_TIME...
Fast forward a few years and i got alopecia and i got health obsessed (just finding out general things about what's good/ pure, what's bad for you, etc. etc.). Got really into finding the purest water and I discovered reverse osmosis water. At first it kind of terrified me because it's literally stripped bare, but the thing that attracted me to it was the no fluoride factor. Now, after several years of drinking almost exclusively reverse osmosis water I have more energy than EVER. Too much sometimes. I can make it through a workday now no problem. Can play around, do whatever. My mind seems clearer (although, my short term memory is not the greatest). I mean, i can't ever see myself going back to the tap. I guess I would drink spring water if I could, but R.O. water is only 29 cents a gallon at the whole foods store. I Just squirt 4 or 5 drops of trace minerals in a glass and I'm good...
Any objections?? Genuinely curious...
Thanks

Wednesday acts tough, but she - like most people - is all talk and I mean sure she killed some supernatural being, but that was a sucky ending and that is not what I'm here to talk about.
I'm here to talk about how she NEVER does what she says she will (not to mention that she is a trash detective) she told that therapist that her school counsellor had a nervous breakdown after their last session, but she hasn't said or done anything even remotely scary in those sessions, not to mention all the crap she - didn't - pull.
Bianca was right, she is a lying creep who doesn't deserve to live. They ruined the Addams family image, the characters are too friendly and her lover disappeared - not her first kiss with Tyler you know - (although I think he may have died at the end of the Addams family movie - being scared to death) AND her baby brother is gone as well, maybe the succeded killing him but who knows. Overall I just think that the Wednesday TV series is annoying, with undeserved media attention.

Hi,
I wasn't really sure what to put in my title, but the issue itself is pretty simple, although strange. I'm running New Vegas, the GOG version, through Heroic Launcher. It works perfectly, except after a couple hours of playtime, it seems like it just loses access to the filesystem. I lose the ability to save or load games, and if I move to a new cell, none of the new textures for that area load. If I go back to the main menu, it's just a pink screen with the normal main menu options. The game is modded, but only so far as stability patches and whatnot. I believe this was happening before any mods were installed, though.
​
The Heroic Games Launcher won't currently provide me a log, it just loads forever, but throughout the runtime of the game, the log does seem to throw quartz errors:
018c:err:quartz:autoplug Failed to create filter for L"MPEG-I Stream Splitter", hr 0x8007000e.
and before crashing, it throws a bunch of these errors:
fixme:server:add_fd_to_cache too many allocated handles, not caching 0xd4b4ac
​
Has anybody run into this and found a solution? I wasn't able to find anything on WineDB, ProtonDB, Google, or any Github issues that track game issues. It's not a huge deal, I don't have that much time to play anyway, so a crash every couple hours isn't hurting me very much, except by causing me to lose the last couple minutes of gameplay before it happens.
​
Specs:
Arch Linux
linux-tkg 6.3rc3
KDE Wayland
Ryzen 7 5800X
RX 5700XT
Latest mesa-git from CachyOS v3 repos
Wine-GE latest release

So my girlfriend and I have been dating for about a year now and I will preface this by saying I love her incredibly much and can see a life with her apart from the issues surrounding our sex life. So for a bit of background, she struggles heavily with anxiety which definitely takes its toll. She has terrible anxiety induced insomnia which affects her pretty much every night that she has something on the next day (work, college, drinks etc). She also struggles a lot with self doubt and body image issues (I am always reassuring and complimenting her on her abilities, appearance etc). Gut issues like bloating (potentially also anxiety induced) also don’t help with the body image thing either. Then there’s the issue of vaginismus (again, probably also anxiety induced). The first few months of us being together there was no issues at all with penetration. She has told me that she have issues with previous partners before me however and had seen a pelvic floor therapist and used dilators to help resolve that, but stopped using them and threw them away a year (as a sort of celebration that she defeated it) before we got together. Also want to be clear - I have never once pressured her into penetrative sex especially not with the vaginismus. I have always been super clear that it doesn’t worry me and we don’t need penetration to have good sex and at the beginning of symptoms when could still PIV but sometimes would have pain, it was always on her terms and I always asked her to communicate any pain with me so I can stop. I have always been super supportive of her through this and never pressured her or made her feel bad. Couple other important details: I definitely have a high libido, hers used to be just medium, wasn’t a problem at all but seems to be low now. She has never had an orgasm and seems to think she never will. Her mom was quite sex negative growing up, saying stuff like sex is gross/men are gross etc from teen years onward - potentially to discourage? But I think all it did is harm my GF’s ideas around sex. Have noticed her mom can be quite dismissive of her dad and not take him seriously with requests or emotions etc. Wonder how this has affected my GF. Anyways, it’s been probably 6 months since the last time we had penetrative sex (which is fine) and a couple more months longer than that since it was regular. Before vaginismus was an issue we would have sex multiple times a week, go for multiple rounds etc - though our living arrangements at the time allowed for this. We have both moved back home to our parents houses for the time being (privacy isn’t an issue when at my house, but is at hers so she is usually too anxious of this to do anything at her house) so aren’t seeing each other as often as when were living in apartments with roommates - but we still probably see each other 2-4 times a week under normal circumstances, which you’d think would mean every time we meet at least at my house that we’d have some sort of sexual activity since its infrequent but this isn’t usually the case. Variety of reasons, sometimes it’s lack of sleep, sometimes she feels insecure, sometimes she is irritable and so on. The real issue is not the lack of PIV sex but the lack of sexual activity in general. Sometimes we go a week or more without really any sexual contact beyond a few kisses and cuddles as my advances for going further get rejected more often than not and she doesn’t really initiate. Average would probably be once per week of some sort of sexual activity usually lasting less than 15min. She also has never given me blowjob to completion - the few it’s gotten close she has got me or her to finish with hands because she doesn’t want me to finish in her mouth (which is fine, she has a very overactive gag reflex) but problem is usually she’ll give head for about a minute then just ask me to finish myself off while she watches then it’s all finished for the night. She also doesn’t really let me go down on her very often anymore despite her always enjoying it (at least that’s what she says and how she acts) and knowing how much I love it, and sometimes when I do she’ll just get me to wrap up early to just stop or on occasion to give me one of those BJs despite me being perfectly happy to go forever. Think she can get insecure about me being down there and seeing her body from that angle as well. I also get a lot of the typical “can we just have one night without any sexual stuff/all you think about is sex” sorta shit which just deflates me, but I feel like she says it as a defence mechanism to deflect from her insecurities or whatever the reason she doesn’t want to may be. I don’t want to have sex just to get off - I want to have sex because it’s the most intimate time with her and emotionally important to me. I think she must think I’m just a man with testosterone making me horny all the time, which while true, doesn’t mean I should just get over it as I don’t care for finishing more so the actual experience with her. I have resorted to masturbating a 3-5 times a week which just makes me feel lonely and want her. Occasionally we’ll have a night where it’s really intimate and fun and all my worries go away but this is like once a month max otherwise its the typical rejection or half ass blowjob/3 min of me giving her head. The good nights are still usually max 20-30 min and never second round or anything - we might do 69 (usually not as she gets insecure of me seeing her in that position) or something and thats as adventurous as it gets lol. Have talked about anal or pegging but she just seems indifferent so haven’t really pursued it much. She hasn’t pursued any sort of treatment for her vaginismus since this has been occurring with us (she mentioned at the start of the year she wanted to get over it, but nothing happened since then) which hurts a lot and makes my stomach churn to think that she obviously cared enough about sex with her FWB’s before me to use dilators and such to fix it. But won’t do it now? I just feel like I can’t really bring up wanting her to see a pelvic floor therapist and dilating again as it isn’t my place and I don’t want to seem selfish making it about me. And it makes her emotional to think about it and how daunting the road ahead to fixing it is. I guess it’s likely also anxiety and upbringing related and so would want her to see someone (CBT?) for that but don’t know how to approach the subject without coming across as selfish, seem like I’m guilt tripping her or hurting her feelings. I just feel really undesired and inadequate due to lack of her initiating and all of the rejection/dismissals toward my end and I really really miss what we had pre vaginismus. I really love this woman and love being intimate with her and all other parts of our relationship are great. I am so empathetic and supportive with all the roadblocks (vaginismus, anxiety, body image, insomnia) she has run into on the way but it seems like she gets too overwhelmed by all of them and then doesn’t want to do anything about any of it. Which I completely understand, but I can’t keep going like this. Any advice?

Need advice about two different jury duty summons. I received a jury summon a few months ago, but had to postpone twice. I just received a second jury summon but with a different juror id. The second one is sooner than the postponed one. What does this mean/what should I do?

Hello psychonauts, I am here because I've started using psilocybin as a method to progress my mind to be more matured and less flawed, but my question is about my mind. ever since I can remember I have always been a softie, anti drugs, anti alc, etc. of course I'm not saying your a softie if you don't do drugs b hopefully you get the point. I've also always grown up empathetic or a better way to put it is I put myself in others shoes. a couple months ago I had a awful experience with an S/A I won't go into it bc of reasons and common sense. but now to the point of the post, my mind I feel like works a different way than others and I am more mature than others. although as soon as I gained this sort of "self awareness" i started to question life, the meanings, the jobs, the "cycles". it spun me into a depression that I'm still fighting. I have so many questions I can't even think of while sober and I need to know if I'm insane or actually mature? maybe I'm hurting myself or others. I have different views on relationships, space, life, reality, etc. all because I feel like everyone does the same thing. work, have kids, live, and die that's all. I want to do me, do the things I want but without working everyday of your life you can't. I'm stuck in my mind and I need answers. I feel insane at times and other times I feel like I've ascended my mind to something I can't conceive yet. or I'm thinking to much I know it's a long post but my brain is too hard to explain in a TL;DR If anyone can recommend ways to have a spiritual trip rather than a recreational one. or maybe another person who's experienced this and found their answer. please help if you can, and thank you if you too the time to read it.

Wednesday acts tough, but she - like most people - is all talk and I mean sure she killed some supernatural being, but that was a sucky ending and that is not what I'm here to talk about.
I'm here to talk about how she NEVER does what she says she will (not to mention that she is a trash detective) she told that therapist that her school counsellor had a nervous breakdown after their last session, but she hasn't said or done anything even remotely scary in those sessions, not to mention all the crap she - didn't - pull.
Bianca was right, she is a lying creep who doesn't deserve to live. They ruined the Addams family image, the characters are too friendly and her lover disappeared - not her first kiss with Tyler you know - (although I think he may have died at the end of the Addams family movie - being scared to death) AND her baby brother is gone as well, maybe the succeded killing him but who knows. Overall I just think that the Wednesday TV series is annoying, with undeserved media attention.

What would make a man who’s had sex with many women and an adventurous sex life skip foreplay while in a committed relationship? Does that mean it’s not as good/ motivating with the long term partner?

Some context before I get to the actual question:
So I was just watching some Lowko and FalconPaladin casts, and sometime in the middle of it I came to a weird realization. In brood war, spider mines are good. they're REALLY good. A good terran player can have near complete map vision and map control without even having a combat unit out on the field. They require your opponent to tread carefully, and whole unit upgrades are dedicated to clearing mines (Dragoon range) and they only cost 75 minerals for a pack of 3. And you get a neat vulture bike as a bonus!
So my question is: Why aren't widow mines being used as actual mines, like the spider mine?
I know I'm in silver 1, but after having this idea, I tried it out on Gresvan against a gold zerg. With four mines, I was able to see every incoming attack, the unit comp incoming, and even got juicy hits against some attempted baneling harassment. Make no mistake: I lost. But I didn't lose because of the mines: it because even with 13 barracks, 2 starports and 2 factories, my sh*tty macro means that I always float 1,000 minerals at the best of times.
I always found it a bit off-putting about how the widow mine just straight up burrows in someone's face. Make no mistake: I think it's balanced. but as far as unit design goes it's up there with the disruptor for 'badly designed units'.
[Also, please actually try to make productive discussion. Just saying "You're silver what do you know about the game" doesn't count.]

I mean as it stands right here and now
I technically don’t own anything, a couple suitcases of clothes that look dumb on me?
A car that isn’t paid off?
No one answering any calls
People gaslighting so they can do what they wanted to do in the first place
I could put my phone down, get out of my car and disappear.

So, I know about tomorrows special opening pitchers, but does anyone have an idea on what time it will happen? Is it the same time as usual first pitches? Or is there more ceremony to opening day?
I haven’t been able to find anything in terms of a schedule of events for opening day. Will there be any other special events prior to first pitch? What time would you guys recommend arriving?
Sorry for all the questions, I’ve never been to an opening day and I’m not sure how early I should get there. I’m cutting work early so I gotta calculate my exit lol
I’m usually at games 30-45 min before first pitch, but I’m assuming for opening day I might want to be earlier.
Thanks for any help!

Looking to give your car an extra kick of power and a mean growl? Look no further than upgrading your cold air intake system! Many car enthusiasts swear by this simple modification, which can increase horsepower, improve throttle response, and even save you money on gas. In this blog post, we'll walk you through the benefits cold air intake upgrade and offer tips for selecting the best option for your vehicle. Get ready to unleash the full potential of your engine and turn heads wherever you go

Hi All,
My name is Will, Australian citizen, lived in Victoria for 23 years, I'm 38 years old, father of four and a loving husband. Never been in trouble with the law, worked hard all my life in I.T (Dev Ops, Network Security) post my workplace injury.
In Nov 2018 I was put on workcover after a long bullying campaign and diagnosed with multiple psychiatric injuries as follows, PTSD, Depression, Severe social anxiety and High anxiety. I suffer paralysis inducing night terrors, loss of cognitive and verbal ability and numerous other health issues as a result of my workplace injuries. Workplace/workcover admit fault and accept that it was caused by my workplace. I have been subscribed a long list of medication, Mirtazapine, Sertraline, Zopiclone, Melatonin, Diazepam, but none of which worked for me and only made my conditions worse.
In around 2020 after reading a lot of research myself, I got and paid 100% myself with the help of Dr Soroush Habibi at Pro Wellness for TGA approval for access to medical cannabis for the treatment of PTSD (yellow spectrum oil then blue spectrum oil later as it worked wonders for myself, I need high doses of THC). I am thousands of dollars out of pocket for my access and the medication.
I have been working with Maurice Blackburn from the start in trying to get the help and support I need, but they are not over helpful with regard to anything to do with access to medical cannabis. The insurer which was Xchanging but is now Gallagher Bassett have reimbursed me for consultations in the past with Dr Soroush Habibi at Pro Wellness but nothing more, not for the cost of TGA approval or any medication I was prescribed from him.
Currently, I have just had my last IME with the report coming back as, "The WorkCover Insurer assessed your level of impairment at 20% pursuant to the Guides to the Evaluation of Psychiatric Injury for Clinicians (GEPIC) in regard to your psychological injury....."
I am currently only on Diazepam/Valium, which I have become highly addicted to and now using higher and higher doses, as it the only drug available to myself that calms me and lets me sleep.
After speaking with my lawyers yesterday we are going for one final dispute, they are under the opinion that I will not hit the very high 30% impairment level required to take further action. I did ask about access to medical cannabis again as it has been rejected by Xchanging and Gallagher Bassett in the past. I received an email from Gallagher Bassett in the last few days stating they are still going to be covering any reasonable medical costs related to my workplace injuries. So I raised it again with Maurice Blackburn. I was told they can only push/fight for reimbursement and access to medical cannabis to be paid by the insurer if I can provide something new to present them with, new research that medical cannabis will be an effective and safe method of treatment.
Today I got another reply from my lawyers as follows, Hi Will, There is no timeframe in which you can ask the insurer to fund the treatment or provide further information. My advice is that it will be difficult to convince the insurer to fund the treatment, and you will likely end up back at the Medical Panel. To strengthen your prospects of winning at the Panel, I have recommended that you obtain additional information to support your need for the medication. In the event that you request funding for the treatment, and this is rejected, I can refer you to our internal disputes team who will be able to assist you through the dispute.
This is where I need help, my wife (a primary school teacher) is 6+ weeks into a serous back injury of which she may need surgery, I have one teenage child living at home and work as a causal farm hand as my conditions do not allow me to work in an office environment, it is looking like I'm going to have to sell my house as my wife is now using her long service leave that won't last much longer.
I need advice on what I can provide/present them with, new research that medical cannabis will be an effective and safe method of treatment for my condition. The workcover system is broken and abused by so-called "Medical Professional". I hope I may be able to help change the system so anyone else in my position in the future does not have to have their conditions worsened due to the stress involved in dealing with them, and can access the legal medication they require.
I have emailed this to the following but awaiting a reply form them,
[email protected] legalisecannabis.org.au, [email protected] gmail.com, [email protected] legalisecannabis.org.au, [email protected] legalisecannabis.org.au, [email protected] parliament.vic.gov.au, [email protected] parliament.vic.gov.au
Sincerely and desperately grateful for any help,

So I started being sexually active last January. I stupidly trusted my partner’s words that they had no stds and we didn’t use protection. Two months into it I freaked out bc I found something I thought could be hpv or hsv. I go to the gyno and he told me it didn’t look like hsv but I still could get tested if I want to and I said yes. He tested me for everything and did a biopsy and it turned out to be just vestibular papilloma. He told me all my tests were negative except for hsv antibodies I was like huh? So do I have an std or not? He told me he doesn’t know. I was so frustrated by his lack of answers and my results I started crying and he got annoyed so i never came back to his office. My results were:
Hsv 1 igg: 0.23 Hsv 2 igg: 0.12 Hsv 1/2 IgM 1.31
I know here y’all say IgM is useless but since this was early and it’s possible early infection I am worried. (Although he said it could also be an old infection)
After my breakup (months later and unrelated to this) I did the standard std test (no hsv one) and came back negative. I spoke to two other doctors that told me not to worry about it because it doesn’t mean anything specially since I don’t have sores I don’t need to test again.
It’s been over a year and I this still keeps me up at night. I talked to a doctor online and he said to relax that two months in igg test catches most infections. And like others said if I don’t have sores I shouldn’t worry.
I talked to another doctor recently and she told me it could mean a new infection but since it was under 2 it could be wrong specially since it’s been over a year and I haven’t had sores. She saw me very distressed so she said I could take a test to clear things up but… I don’t know if I want to. I am single and I don’t plan on being active again anytime soon so there’s no rush but I am worried. What will I do when the time comes and I have a new partner? Do I disclose this weird result? Do I test again now? Do I ask my new future partner if they’d like me to get tested again? Most of the doctors told me I don’t need to disclose but I’d feel awful not to. Am I being ridiculous?
I’ve read a lot about testing for asymptomatic people is not recommended and most people don’t test for it. I am lowkey mad my first gyno didn’t tell me that or at least warned me to wait more for more accurate results. Now I live in uncertainty and if I test positive I will suffer the stigma while other asymptomatic people live happily ever after in ignorant bliss.
What do y’all think I should do?

Hello Reddit! I am a 26 f dating a guy who’s 29 years old. We been dating 5 years and would love to soon move out with eachother, however currently my bf is the sole provider of his household. His mom who is around 65 decided to retire as soon as he graduated, ever since he’s been the sole provider of the family. He has an older sister who is unemployed (by choice), who does not help financially. He was unemployed for a while (not by choice) recently employed as a freelance graphic designer earning 28 dollars/ 30 hrs a week (gets paid monthly) He has struggled saving up because although his mom is retired, and although she has a disability with her back she has very little money saved up, no disability benefits and the retirement money is not enough to cover for herself living alone. My bf is struggling in saving up since he is the only one who has to pay the 1200 dollars every month on the rent, including all of the other utilities such as food etc. Clearly I feel like there’s probably help somewhere for his mom to get money and housing but we are an extremely misguided young couple on which have no idea where to go and what to look for. I want to have a future with this man, but lately this whole situation with his mother is becoming a huge obstacle into our future. If anyone has any information please let me know! Thank you!

I was consulted for pre-op risk stratification for a patient at intermediate risk undergoing high risk surgery (patient with history of stent and cancer undergoing elective head and neck surgery). I noted the NP's clinic note from last month here:
"Recommendation: admit day prior to surgery, continuous cardiopulmonary assessments, continuous cardiac monitoring, daily EKGs and troponins. Consider placement of Swan Ganz catheter for hemodynamic optimization. No need to hold vasodilatory agents prior to surgery. Additionally, please consult cardiology day of admit for further recommendations.
Case discussed with attending, Dr. ***."
I texted that attending and they told me that they never saw the patient. It was only the NP who saw them.
Of course, there was no echocardiogram nor stress test on file for this patient with poor functional capacity of less than 4 METs.
​
Like what??? Where does it say on the guidelines to place a Swan for this elective surgery, continue ACEi/ARBs, trend troponins, and even more say you discussed with the attending but you never did?? And now patient's surgery is probably going to be delayed because the important tests were never done. *face slap* How is this even cost or time effective?

TW: death, mention of suicidal thoughts and eating disorders.
I made the not so wise decision of letting someone follow me on twitter, forgetting how uncomfortable i get ranting non-stop where someone else can actually see. So here I am again.
It's been a hell of a year, huh (but captain! It's only march). Somehow, all the things that were keeping me sane and filled with motivation gradually faded away. I still have things that keep me positive, I do! Going back to the pink man was one of the best decisions I've ever taken. He and my fellow mexican have been the only two people that truly tried to comprehend me and were so communicative about everything that's been going on. They've been here for me and I am forever thankful. Two of my favorite teachers have been supportive of my Thesis, and seeing someone I respect and admire filled with enthusiasm for my own work just scratches that ick that my inner child never got to scratch. I also made a very cool friend with whom i share almost all my interests, that makes me happy.
On the other hand, things got out of control. First, I did bad on a subject that has a heavy weight on my emotions. Well, technically the first thing was mr "What do you mean we won't fuck? Well, goodbye then!", but he never was that important.
Then, the loss of my childhood dog, I'm forever thankful for all the years I spent close to her, she was truly unique. If it wasn't because my aunt reached out to me because my dog was in her last week, i wouldn't have had the chance i got to say goodbye. The state she was in was devastating to see, i remember telling her that it was ok if she couldn't handle such a sick body, that it was ok if she had to go cause all the love she gave us was forever stuck with us in this world. Cause, after all, grief is love's souvenir. Heaven is not big enough for her.
Later on, my best friends backstabbing me. I didn't see this one come (that's what she said). I've been through a big depressive episode for more than a month now, and they chose to get mad about it? They put my low energy against me, both of them speaking so bad about me behind my back and weeks later telling me all of that out of spite to my face. I did everything I could to be there for them to the point I got burnt out (hanging out multiple times a week, letters, gifts, emotional support, talking about them about how i felt about them and doing my best to try and have the best frienship i could with them) and i got paid back with hate? I totally did not deserve that. I never hid I was on a depressive episode, I wish I could control them so I can be there and be my best self all the time, but being sad and having less energy is not my fault. I don't know how i am supposed to recover from everything they said, cause i truly feel like I can't trust them anymore and already chose to get distant with one of them because of the last serious conversation we had. I don't know how to deal with loosing my best friends, but it seems like the best option.
What's more, i hate how my family always hide things from me. I know my mother has never been of good company, but I think that getting the bad news that my grandmother has cancer from my neighbour mentioning it as if i already knew it is a new kind of low. What the fuck did I do to deserve being mistreated so badly? First all the eating disorder accusations, calling me a "trastornada" because she just felt like it and demanding to control my every meal when I never showed a damn sign of having an eating disorder (BECAUSE I DON'T) and now this? I wish for the day wheb I can live far away from her and none of her bullshit will bother me.
Now, I don't know where to find the energy i need to do all my homework and also care for myself. This week I'll be calling a new therapist, but in the meanwhile i lack motivation, suicidal thoughts have been pretty frequent again, I don't feel capable nor have the strength to do all the things i have to do. I'm already behind schedule on all my subjects, I have no current interests nor things that I'm passionate about. I feel lost, i feel like nothing is worth it at all.
I don't know what the future holds, but i do hope things get better from now on.

On dating apps, when a guy says he’s looking for “something casual” does this usually just mean hookups?
I feel like I define casual as just not being in a committed/exclusive relationship but I still enjoy going on dates and having some sort of relationship that doesn’t just resolve around sex. What do you define this as?