Since I realized we are a system I was hoping we were around 10 members because part of us being a system caused me to have terrible memory and it's a big insecurity of mine, and I'm now trying to come to terms with the fact we probably have more then 10 members and it could take me years to get to know them and then even more time to remember their names and details about them,
And I'm sad, I face a lot of difficulties in life trying to not insult or anger people for forgetting their names or even who they are (not to mention forgetting to do stuff I need to or people told me to and the anger I receive afterwards),
I'm writing this as a way to confront that this is real and come to terms with the fact I'll probably never have a "regular person's" memory capacity
—host

I am numb, I am crushed, I was used, we have a 5 year old son together. I don't understand why she would ruin what we had. I am too exhausted to emotionally grasp what I walked into at 3am.
For context, I'm an airline pilot, I left this morning at 1030am and had a very eventful day, long story short I was supposed to end up in Toronto and ended up being able to go home instead. The last thing I told my gf was that I wasn't able to make it home. (She wasn't expecting me) I wasn't expecting her to be at our apartment since she left before me this morning with our Son and dog to visit her family.
I arrive home at 3am, (16 hours of work) to see her car parked in the lot. I was confused since she was supposed to come home the following day. I was excited to see her and my Son. That is my favorite thing in the world is coming home seeing my gf and son cuddled up sleeping peacefully.
I walk in our apartment, notice our dog wasn't in the kennel. I figured maybe she left him out to sleep in our Sons room so he doesn't bark when I arrive home. I walk over to the bedroom and see my gf sleeping and to my horror I see another man holding his arm around my gf in our bed where I was expecting to see my son.
I cant believe what I'm seeing, Im exhausted and in pure disbelief. I pull out my phone and record with the flashlight. I see all these clothes she bought from Victoria secret from the mall, (she said she was there with girl friends, not) among other stores. I see clothing you would use to role play or just have sex with something nice looking. Part of it was a wig which was weird to me, I looking around more to see a $200 sex toy she was excited to get which she was saying she wanted me to use it on her while I was gone. It was some remote control vibrator thing. I can see the side of her she is in her underwear and a shirt, I look around more to see a used condom on the nightstand.
I grabbed my suitcase and walked back out the door and I'm currently at a friend's house for the night. While they sleep together In my bed. While I make money for our family my gf of 6+ years is cheating on me.
I have given this girl my whole world, my love, loyalty, and care. She is a stay at home mom with no job. I give her this as a choice, to spend more time raising our Son. I provide while she is the caretaker of our home.
A lot of things make sense now looking back, the biggest hint was she was never in the mood to have sex with me. I think she emotionally detached a while ago but has no one to take care of her besides me and the child support she will receive from me now. She would tell me what she would do if we broke up. Very odd to say things like that, I didn't want to believe it but she doesn't love me or respect me anymore. Let alone she doesn't respect herself and most importantly she disrespected our 5 year old Son.
Our Son does not deserve this, It will be very difficult with my career to see him. The worst part is our son and I picked up flowers and chocolate for her yesterday. While she was out with her "friends" she was at this dudes places while I was doing all the chores so she could have a night off. We even bought the new avatar 2 movie to watch together.
I am so fucking lost, I have off tomorrow and want to go to my apartment. I just want to see the girl I thought she was and my Son.

G.SKILL Trident Z5 Series 32GB (2 x 16GB) DDR5 6400 Desktop Memory Model F5-6400J3239G16GX2-TZ5K

ASUS Z690-E (aura sync/armoury crate not installed)
Razer Basilisk Ultimate (razer synapse etc not installed)
OpenRBG works and I'm able to control lighting on my mouse/mobo however once run the SPD no longer reads in HWiNFO64, CPU-Z etc. and hangs on system restart (Q-Code 55 - no ram installed - reseated it several times) until I clear CMOS. Worked fine for a while until I recently introduced the Razer mouse into the equation. Strange thing is that my RAM is not even RGB yet it is somehow affected by openRGB. I tried disabling shared SMBUS under driver but no dice. Any suggestions? Thx.

Ok, so there's been issues that I (35F)can't get over, and he (42m)still does what he wants. I feel there's no love on his part. And he not cut out for marriage, or being a dad. ultimately it has lead me to come to decision. That will being (me ) to be more civil. Even though I made the decision to separate, I am having a hard time. I still love my husband, but at the same time I'm tried of being gaslighted. And for my mental health I am aware, and realize that I have to see his actions for what they are. I have to accept that he didn't waste no time in staying out all night. I have to take away how I feel about him, and see it how he makes me feel.

Ok so I'm just coming out the other end of being cheated on. The divorce is finalized for a few months. It has been basically a 3 or 4 year ordeal although for the first 3 I didn't really know what was going on.
Now I've read a bunch of accounts on here and a few books the one I liked the most was leave a cheater gain a life. I'm shocked by how similar the patterns are and how similar the excuse language used is. Now most of the language used in my case was verbatim that used in other accounts but one thing that seemed a little different was that she portrait her situation as a hole that she had dug herself into that she was struggling to get out of. I wonder if anybody else was told this before as well? Would this fall under the "but I loved you all along category"? Like I loved you all along but I had dug myself into a hole of getting easy sex and praise all the time and I just can't get out of it.

A budy of mine gave me a suplement that is suposed to help me loos fat. it contains 1000 mg of inulin per dose, and it says i should take it 2 times per day.
Will this amount of inulin help me lose it?

So we all know there's five prayers at different hours and that most countries do not have the same time zone. So is God in the possession of hundreds of watches to be able to control at the second if you ate on time, if you prayed on time, like its a drama if you did it one minute before the right time. All that just makes it even more visible that this is nonsense like only if every countries had the same time zone it would have probably made sense. You could cheat like idk you live in Canada but want to do it on Japan's time zone, it is still valuable because in fact the sun is setting in another country. Its like you just traveled and you're still settled on your country's timezone. I don't know how to explain that hope you understood my point

Once upon a time, Conan the Barbarian was out for a walk in the countryside when he stumbled upon a group of small ducks. Being the fierce warrior that he was, Conan decided to take them on in battle.
The ducks, being small and cute, didn't seem like much of a threat to Conan. But as soon as he swung his sword, he realized he had underestimated them. The ducks started flapping their wings and quacking furiously, dodging his attacks and pecking at him with their beaks.
Conan tried to fight back, but the ducks were too quick and too numerous. He found himself surrounded by a sea of feathers and beady little eyes, all staring at him with a look of defiance.
Just when Conan thought all hope was lost, he had an idea. He grabbed a nearby loaf of bread and threw it into the air. The ducks, being ducks, immediately forgot about their battle with Conan and went after the bread, leaving him to escape unscathed.
As Conan walked away, he couldn't help but laugh at the ridiculousness of the situation. He had just been defeated by a group of small, harmless ducks. But as he looked back at them happily pecking away at the bread, he realized that maybe, just maybe, they weren't so harmless after all.

Hello fellow travellers of the interwebs!
I have recently just quit my full time employment in favour of adopting a new career that allows me the fulfillment of travel, new adventures and plenty of time to experience the great wide world!
After spending the last 6 years feeling less than fulfilled I have decided that I am going to start living for me and with that hopefully comes new people, friends and hopefully a little spice. I would love to meet some new people that share a love of travel, tattoos, books and movies! Even if only one of those things is your jam, then please feel free to slide on in to my mailbox...(not a euphemism.. 😂)
I love travelling and outdoor adventure! I will often take mini vacations to remote parts of the country, set up camp and enjoy nature with my dog and a good book. I also love photography and creating my own prints, which is weird because I would never describe myself as creative.
I'm an introvert that loves spontaneous eruptions of extrovertism! I'll get my social fix then ramble back to my cosy abode to recharge those social batteries.
Anyways, I like to keep a somewhat air of mystery around myself, makes for more interesting reading and conversation later. Or so I choose to believe 🤔.
Happy to swap pictures and move to another app should we hit it off 📸.
I Look forward to chatting with you 😊
!unlock

Anyone plays valo (plat+)? G to duo trio since I have time this weekend. Up for unrated!
Okay lang na kalaro lang but open to be more than if we vibe ahaha. :)
About me: Small Working and stable Entertaining naman daw kalaro(?)
You: Tall (kasi small na ako 😅) Working 26+ l Pls be single para no issue
Hmu w your ign! G? :)

Sorry for this long and maybe dark story too, but I really need a solution, need some1 to tell me if I am right or wrong and what should I do, cuz I can't take it anymore, my parents now don't live together, but they are legally still married, my father (according to what my mother says) used to be awful person and used to beat her ( he used to beat her that is true but the reason is unknown, and I will say why later) but yeah ik he shouldn't no matter what, anyway my mother still lived with him, and why I said according to my mother, is because my mother is also very awful too, she always tells our secrets to any1, even if that 1 is a lady in the street whom she got to talk to, the whole building knows all our secrets beside her coworkers, my father coworkers ( because she calls them), and nearly half the area where I am from, and she never tells things as they are, she loves to lie, to say whatever comes to her mind, she for example fights with me for any trivia then tells every1 about it and lie to make me look bad, say anything that I didn't say or do just to make me the evil person, and if I tried to defend or say the truth it will be a black week or maybe month of nonstop fighting, and as I said, she fight for anything,if I told her a story that happened in the school for example and she didn't like it she may fight with me about it for a week or so and beat me, she beats me alot ,sometimes with belt, and once stung me with a candle,then that time came when my father stopped fighting with her and started to follow her, and do whatever she tells him, idk how or why but it happened,, but that didn't make her any better, instead, she started to push him to fight with me too, and instead of 1, I had to fight with both of them like daily, but the problem didn't stop here, they both bought an apartment, both paid on it but she told him to register it in her name, so she now owns it, once they bought the furniture and the apartment was completed she kicked him out of it, and as it is registered in her name she is the legal owner and he can't do anything, despite paying almost all what he had on it, he then moved away but I still had contact with him, to take the money my mother told him to pay her monthly, then she started to fight with me more and more than before, and with every fight she told me that she will send me to live with my father, which I did, after non stopping continous threats, but after 1 day surprisingly she called me again, she never did that especially after huge fights, as I said she may spend a month or more fighting with me or not talking to me unless she wants me to buy her something which I always did, she asked how I am doing..etc, she then called me again to have breakfast with her, but I will bring it with me and she will pay me back that money, I agreed and started to pay her more visits, just to realize that she did that only so she can have some1 who buys her her stuff, as I used to be that 1 before despite everything I still used to do so, and at this point I have to say how my life with my father was, it was poor but peaceful, as I said my father paid almost what he had on the apartment, but he never fought with me, we used to laugh and joke, but when it comes to money he tells me that he doesn't have, and that his salary is barely feeding us, he is obviously lying, cuz his salary isn't that few, but he barely pay on anything other than food, but still regarding anything else it was a peaceful life, then it came that my mother told me to go back to her, sadly, I saw the agreed and excited look on my father when I told him so, he still doesn't want me here, but it is because of money, I went there then expectedly we fought again, cuz my father gave me money for my school (which is rare) ,but she took it from me, I told her to bring it back but her brother interfered and kept pushing me back, and with more than 20 years old difference, there was no chance for me, so I called my father and went to live with him again, he was upset but he didn't refuse, then after 1 hour she called me, asked me whether I will come to have breakfast with her I told her no, she told me whether I will come back or not I told her no, now I am living with my father again, he is trying to hide his feelings but I can still feel it, and I feel unwanted, idk whether I am right or wrong, or whether I should have just went to live with her or not, my father will be at work most of the time and I will have to spend that time alone, and many suicidal thoughts are raging in my head now, even while I am writing this.I had to talk, I had to tell any1 cuz I really need an advice for what should I do, should I have just left her the money? Should I apologize to her? thx in advance

Wow. I was just going through my profile and found that my first post was on this thread 3 years ago. Detailing how frustrated I was with myself and my shame, from growing up in poverty and trying to navigate college surrounded by students with much more well off backgrounds than my own. I just wanted to give you all an update.
I’ve actually been in awe this past week by how much my life has changed. I graduated school with honors on full scholarship. I gained experience as a lab director, vaccine specialist, and COVID-19 research team lead all while in school. I became so comfortable balancing my part time warehouse job with my internships, school, and research that once I graduated and began working full time, I didn’t know what to do with myself! So while I had a full time job in a field I love, in my free time I got my bartending license, and started bartending as a hobby. ( I guess as someone who grew up poor, I had a hard time having a hobby that didn’t support me in some way.) For the last year since I’ve graduated, I’ve been working about 80 hours a week, which felt like nothing compared to college. With my two jobs, I was making 6 figures.
In high school I busted my ass at my part time job to save up $500 cash to buy my first car. It was a death trap that would shut off while driving.
This past week I used my excellent credit score, savings, and phenomenal haggling skills to purchase a BRAND NEW car. A 2023. Every day I sit in my car and I can’t even believe it’s mine.
Growing up my grandparents adopted me from a foster home when they really couldn’t afford another child. I always felt so guilty for the financial burden I put on them.
Over the last year or so my grandfather who raised me was diagnosed with lung cancer. I picked up extra bartending shifts and began paying for my grandparents medications, food, bills, whatever they needed. I can finally take care of them. And my grandfather just went into remission this week.
And in the last couple of weeks I just accepted a new job in my field that pays nearly 6 figures on its own. I can quit bartending if I want to! Or not, and boost my savings even more.
I don’t mean to sound like I’m bragging, I am just in absolute awe at what my life has become. I never in a million years thought I would be this financially independent and successful, let alone just a year after graduating college.
I’m so, so grateful for where I am today and how far I’ve come. And I’m so grateful for how difficult my childhood was growing up poor, it taught me extremely valuable lessons.
My friends will see how hard I’m working and say “You’re crazy! How do you have that work ethic?” And I just kind of laugh to myself and think, compared to all the shit I’ve been through, this is easy.
Thank you for listening.

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https://soundcloud.com/gozudj/gozu-the-dj-final-mixxxxx
tracklist:
energy zone - jungle warrior
bounty killaz - brighter future
bounty killaz - approach & identify
chaos & julia set - natural high (parts 1 & 2)
darkman - we're gonna
chaos & julia set - fear the future (chaos mix)
bonny & the highlander - summer breeze (mickey finn's breeze mix)
dj mad axe - mutha mix
pete cannon - proceed to twist one
kenetic - call of the wild
pete cannon - do it again
mickey finn - reality
j majik - meridian (tim reaper remix)
ratty - step back in time
bizzy b - afraid of the dark
ratty - source of all evil
aphrodite - beautiful bass
church of extacy - modulator
interface - listen to the light
jungle pirate - mutiny on the bounty
chris energy - 2 bad to mention
rabbit in the moon - freak to the beat

I've been taking curcumin for a long time in different formulations and different dosages.
It is an excellent natural inflammatory, perhaps the most powerful next to Omega 3.
Inflammation is known to be accompanied by specific Th1 cytokines.
However I've found in many studies that at low doses curcumin may induce an increase in Th1.
But I can't find anywhere how specific "low" means to humans .
Could someone help me with an answer based on personal experience or from scientific sources on this topic?...A practical suggestion will be appreciated.
Thanks in advance!

I'm a diffuse thinner with a NW2-3 hairline and I've got a very greasy scalp. When I wash my hair it looks "good" for the rest of the day but overnight my scalp produces enough oil to feed a small village so when I wake up my hair is all disgusting making my balding much more visible.
The only way to get my hair back to normal is by shampooing, which is why I shower first thing in the morning. But then, I also go to the gym 4x per week and sweat has a similar effect on my hair appearance, so after the gym the only way I feel comfortable going out in public is by washing my hair again.
Overall I end up shampooing 10/11 times per week and I don't know if this could have some negative effect on hair loss.

Intense pain in my belly (everywhere but it hurts to the touch in my lower belly). I'm not on my period and i'm a week away from it. No pain when rasing my right leg. No fever. It calmed with antispasmodic. What can this be? Can this be appendicitis? Now I went to the toilet two times and feel I feel better with the medication

Hi, I'm 24 and born French. I'm a State Certified Engineer in Computer Science (i.e. Engineering Degree, equivalent to a Master's). I'm currently a front-end developer (which is what I love to do). I'm definitely good at it, and reaching further and further with time.
I can't stand the attitude anymore, people not understanding the meaning of the word "vacation", always tearing each other down, always needing something from me, always demanding more, and my family.
There's someone I know that is American, and thought if I had to chose anything it'd be there. English (and American English) is a language I love and would definitely not be an issue.
As far as I'm aware (correct me if I'm wrong), based on me being an Engineer I have a few visa options available to me as long as I can find a company willing to hire and sponsor me for it. (Dual) citizenship could also be on the table, but I think it'd be easier after having worked and lived there for a while.
As far as "work culture" goes, I'm not a big fan of anything that resembles a cult or a "family", that's just people trying to invade your privacy and personal life. I prefer to chill and cool down alone.
I don't mind group activities. I'm definitely far from being the most social person, but if I feel like it I can participate.
As work itself goes, I do prefer working as part of a team (ideally with at least a web designer and a back-end developer). Separation of concerns is definitely a key factor in this field.
When it comes to health, I guess I'm relatively normal? I never get sick beyond a common cold. My only issues are my struggles to gain weight and my love for sugar which sometimes leads to cavities.