Someone from legaladvice suggested I post this here.
For some background, my housemate has a severe alcohol addiction which he’s open about but not willing to work on. A mutual friend who’s known him longer than I have told me he’s a compulsive liar- After moving out with him I heard he asked to borrow her Nintendo switch and instantly sold it to buy drinks.
The situation right now is messy. I’ve been living here since mid January and it’s gotten progressively worse ever since. It started with drunk breakdowns past 3am, fights between him and his friend, blasting political videos at full volume way past the states noise curfew, trashing the place with empty bottles and food scraps- waiting until I gave up asking him to clean and cleaned it for him.
We got an eviction notice since rent has been in arrears for a while, I transfer my rent to him in a shared account so I had no clue. I paid off the arrears myself and discussed with the property manager about staying and having someone else move in which she was all for. He found out I paid it off and is refusing to move, which the manager isn’t doing anything about since we are no longer in arrears. We have a meeting coming up about who’s going to be staying…
After that, it has turned for the worst. He said if any of my friends enter the premises he’ll call the police as if they are trespassers. I’ve been threatened multiple times, he has been walking in my room when I’m gone and moving stuff around, opening my door at night and just standing there for a bit, arguing with me and refusing to clean, a few nights ago I saw a flashlight from the balcony going into my window.
I stayed at my friends for nearly two weeks because I didn’t feel safe, and when I got back a few nights ago, I cannot BEGIN to describe the state of the house. There’s more than 15 rubbish bags all around the floor, moulded plates in the sink, a fruit fly infestation… it’s genuinely unliveable. I had a friend come back with me, he accidentally walked in the housemates room thinking it was the bathroom, and apparently it’s so much worse than the living area. According to him, you can’t see the floor due to how much rubbish there is, and an unmade mattress on the floor with puke all over it.
I’ve been asking my friends to stay over for my own safety- I contacted my friend who’s a cop and he told me I can legally do this since I’m an occupant. Usually I wouldn’t have guests over without permission out of respect for the housemate, but I have none. I’m worried he’ll go further than threaten me and I think I’m in my right to believe so.
A few hours ago I got back home to being locked out. There’s a second lock on the door that has a sign that says do not turn, since there’s no key for it. It was turned. I ALWAYS check this lock. There’s no other explanation besides he turned it when I left.
I haven’t recorded him threatening me at all, but I’ve started to record every interaction I have with him just in case, as well as pictures of the state of the house.
Is there anything I can do to get him out or make him stop?

Hi all, I am looking into adopting a cat through petrescue.com.au and am after some advice/insight from anyone who has used the site!

1. How long did the application process take?
2. Can I apply for more than one cat at the same time in case I don't succeed with my first choice? Or will this make the organisation think I want multiple cats?
3. What do they look for during a house inspection? I have moved any dangerous plants outside (and plan on keeping the cat indoors unless supervised) but am not sure if there is more I need to do.
4. What type of carrier would you recommend, soft or hard? I live a few hours away from Melbourne so I want to make sure the cat is comfortable but also safe for our drive home.
5. Any tips for a first time cat owner? I really want to make sure the cat is not too stressed out by the adoption.

Thanks in advance!

You know you want to, deep down, run away together and build something meaningful. Escape and build more
We can do it together, run away, start a family. Scratch that urge to do better, to raise our kids.
Let’s do it right, let me take you out for ice skating and pizza, let’s really make a connection and maybe, just maybe everything will be perfect and we can scratch that itch…
About me:
I’m M, 22 and 6ft 6 / 197cm.
I’m easy going and love sport, the outdoors, painting, music, and chilling at home.
I can play 3 instruments - bonus points if you can guess which ones.
I’ve got a B Sci and I’m currently studying a Dip Mech Eng, I used to be a head brewer for a small-medium sized brewery so I love nerding out about science, beer and how things work.

Thought id never post here, but here goes, Im at my wits end with my brother. For some context, hes an okayish dude, has no respect for personal boundaries and cant seem to grasp that there are "alternative" people that dont align with his views on life. When i mean alternative, i mean people in general that arent like him, social, happy, and align with the "normal" life that he perceives. To put it simply, recently hes become more toxic than normally and is generally really disrespectful towards me than my other brothers, which i cant understand because i treat them each in their own respected way and generally respect them. But its like he hates me or something, and does small things that keep triggering me. Ive told him before that i dont like hugs, or that he gets so close to me in my personal space, and then still does it after i told him not to... with the most recent one him forcing his arm down my mouth to the point where my lip starts bleeding. He then got mad that i elbowed him but i was terrified and couldnt release. (Hes stronger and younger than i am). Its gotten to the point where if anyone else tries to give me a hug or just tries to show me affection, i back away or flinch, no matter what happens. If people come close to my hips, I flinch. Im at the point where i want nothing to do with him. He doesnt respect my choices at all, and keeps telling me that im not our parents, which i know, but just today, i asked him not to constantly mention me by name on whatsapp (for personal reasons) and he replied snarkily that im not our parents. I give up. Im genuinely lost to the point where i cant be around him, and purely him without losing myself in a sea of hate and anger. And its only him, no one else, doesnt matter if its a friend, an enemy or even just family i dont like. I want to cut him loose but if i cant really because hes the golden boy in our family, smart, "normal" socially popular and talented. All i know is how to fix stupid computers and make people uncomfortable. I dont know anymore. Also apologies if my thoughts are all over the place, i have mental thingies that i havent been diagnosed with yet so i dont know what the source of it is. Also to note, this isnt the first time he hasnt respected my wishes, its happened quite a few times during our childhood, and the stupid thing of it all? I have a better relationship with my step brothers than that of this brother.
TLDR: Brother might have caused trauma but i dont know what to do with him.

My liege has multiple duchies and the duchy my land belongs to is not his primary title. If i try to get a claim on his title, it selects his primary title. How do i get a claim on his non-primary duchy, the .duchy that my lands belongs to and would make sense for me to become a duke of

I’ll be honest, I used to avoid this sub because of some of the negativity towards men. I would read these posts about shitty husbands and partners and just wonder, “Ok, why did you marry this loser?? Why do you keep reproducing with him?” And I would feel secretly smug because my husband is such a catch and I picked such a good one and I could have bragged about him allllll day. Literally could not fathom how so many women seemed to be ending up in shitty marriages.
I guess I didn’t realize how much changing circumstances can reveal totally different parts of your partner. My husband was amazing before we had kids together. He was amazing when our first was a newborn. I spent the first week in bed while he changed every diaper and handled everything. As she got older he got distracted with work and started to really drop the ball at home. It got worse and worse. We just had our second and he’s been straight up awful to me and our kids. You can check my post history if you want the details on that appalling story.
Everyone clueless person on Reddit says “just leave him” as if it’s that simple. I was downvoted in the comments of my other post for pointing out that casually up and leaving is not so simple when you have 2 kids under 2, a homestead you run together, and entwined financial everything. I’ve been starry-eyed in love with and completely devoted to this person for years and I’m only just barely realizing how out of line he’s capable of being. I don’t live near any family or support network. My daughter is obsessed with daddy and so happy and thriving, splitting up would wreck her. And I know this because I’ve been divorced once before and it was the ugliest, most brutal thing my kids and I have ever been through. We’re all still in therapy. I have to wonder if these “just leave him” people have ever seen how insanely expensive, traumatic and destructive “just leaving” can be for everyone involved. Not to mention, men are most likely to become abusive when their partner tries to leave, and already abusive men are most likely to murder their partners at that point too. I cannot stand how casual this site is about divorce, especially with kids involved.
I really tried to pick better this time. And I did overall. But not good enough, apparently. You just can’t know everything in advance.
Where I’m at now is disengaging. I’ve been a single parent before so I’m treating myself like one now. We get along well and are still friends, so we’ll enjoy platonic family game nights and dinners like normal. But other than that, my attention is on myself, my life and hobbies and passions. Dates, sex, all of that is over for me unless/until he chooses to go therapy and start over from square one wooing me and going above and beyond what kind of spouse/partner he wants to be. I don’t care if he fucks other people. My focus is on my kids and myself, and he’s my roommate.

So I just want to preface that the upper management (CEO, CFO, COO, the bosses of the shift managers basically) at this restaurant is horrible. Every restaurant I’ve worked at has had labor & health violations to some degree but this one takes the cake. Most servers at my restaurant put up with the basically criminal upper management bc we average 500+ on a good night. I desperately wanted to keep this job and even organized my summer around it as a poor 21 y/o student.
I’ve been working there for about 2 months now (served since 17), make very few mistakes, and got great reviews from customers even as a trainee training. Even the other servers and lower management acknowledged very early on that I was good at my job.
Until tonight, when I got assigned a 12 top pre-booked reservation (which is normal for me). NOTE that we have a expo that takes all the food and I will only check if it’s been taking wayyy too long and/or customers ask bc we are a high volume, multi-floor restaurant & it’s a big time drain to do so.
Everything was smooth at first. I took their appetizers and drinks flawlessly. I took their post-app food/entrees flawlessly. Then the apps came out, which took less than 20 mins. When they came, they started to question where the food was that they ordered after the appetizers, and why it didn’t come with them. I told them that I took their app orders first, & so naturally the rest of the food would come all together in a second batch. They said okay. Their entrees had not been taking longer than the average time it takes for a table that large to get all their food together (30 mins max). It hadn’t even been 20 mins post app before they just cancelled their entrees. At no point did they complain to me that their food was taking too long in general. A couple of them only asked why they didn’t get the food that they ordered as entrees when the apps came out & I explained why.
I found it odd they were being so impatient , but it was fine by me regardless. I told the managers, we took everything that they didn’t get yet off the check. At this point it became clear they just didn’t want to pay at all. They complained to me about a roach they saw earlier after already being handed the check, and asked for the manager again. The managers then gave them another discount and they left. I was not privy to the convo they had with managers but it was clear they communicated things to them that they didn’t to me.
Then at the end of the night after I did all my side work, my floor manager tells me he has to let me go bc the upper management will decide so after the customers ‘inevitably’ call & complain in the morning (plus they hold booked banquets to high standards). He was very sympathetic to me and told me that there are 2 sides to these situations but the upper management only cares about the customers’. I was deeply confused because as far as I knew, none of their complaints had to do with my actual service or me but rather the environment. I’m hyper aware of when i make mistakes yet didn’t feel I’d made one.
He said I should’ve told him if there issues with the food, but I said that there were no evident issues. The only food they didn’t get was the entrees they refused to wait a reasonable time for while their appetizers were on the table, nor did they tell me they felt their food was taking too long until they were ready to cancel. I asked if I was getting fired for food taking too long (something completely out of my control) and he gave an apprehensive yes.
After further discussion, and me pointing out how other servers were quitting left and right anyway, he told me I was on 2-day leave and to come in afterwards and tell the upper managers my side. I said okay, and went to cry in the corner (during which i overheard him ranting about how broke customers make servers lose their jobs and a manager in training told me not to cry bc she’d vouch for me).
My floor manager said they might just choose to transfer me to a location across the street but they make half the money there for the same illegally long, grueling shifts and shitty upper management.
I don’t know what to do, I just want to keep this job.
TDLR; I am on the brink of termination for something I feel that was out of my control: a large group that cancelled their food which they didn’t even wait 20-25 mins for & were ultimately dissatisfied for seemingly non-server related reasons. I desperately want to keep this job, and have organized my summer around it. How should I move forward?

Hi, since I took out my nipple piercings a year ago, there is white scarring on either side of the nipple/areola. It looks awful and is making me feel self conscious as it clearly doesn't look normal. I can't find much help online regarding how to go about it. I am desperate and will try anything!
Any tips/advice to get my nipples back to normal?

I (18M) recently graduated from high school and will be attending collage out of state. I'm saying this because I was from the bay area originally, I lived there for about 10 years until the 5th grade. Around 1st grade I met my childhood friend (18F) who we'll call J who's sister (20F) was and kind of still is my sister's (20F) friend but they've basically lost all contact. I had a crush on J for the longest time however she never liked me like that and after a while I just gave up because I moved to the another side of the city so 4th grade was the last year I got to see her.
Starting 5th grade I had a new school but it didn't last long as I left the bay area around mid-5th grade to the Most Diverse city in America (according to google). The last time I ever talked to J was in the 6th grade on facetime. Fast forward to a couple months ago and apparently my sister (20F) saw J on her IG feed and I was stunned on how she looked, I mean I was stunned because the last time I saw her was when we were 11.
We go now to currently where I'll be leaving in August and before I go out of the state I want to meet her again and say my goodbyes to J to tell her how and what I've been doing for the past 7 years but sadly I never got her socials and my sister lost that her account. I came here to ask what to do and if she can somehow contact me hopefully it goes on tiktok or something.
One more thing to confirm I know I'll have found you the future is that one time we saw Saw II or the time I brought that one scientist board game to your house with me. my sister, your sister, and you played it or that time your wii had collection games that we played together. If you post this on tiktok all ask is to not make this anonymous hope fate has something in store for me (Ik that's cringe)

hello, this is my first story, I intend to make this a prologue, so that an idea of the future will be paved in a certain way. Please keep in mind that in the main story it will at first follow the near exact path that the main series that the world's best redditor (in my personal opinion) has created, but once I have set the foundation for the story, it will go on as its own divergence. Once again, when the main parts of the story begin, it will almost be the same, but begin to become its own story. I'm open to suggestions and will greatly appreciate feedback. Thank you, and now onto the prologue.
edit: I forgot to add prologue on the title, and now I can't change it... sorry...
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Memory transcription subject: REDACTED Date: [Standardized human time] July 11, 2136
Once again, I have been called to... investigate a child who may possess the gift... Of course, the will of the forsaken protector has sent me to the cradle... home of the gojids...
Normally when I arrive to the forsaken worlds it usually takes [weeks] to get results, and they are almost always a lie... It's as if the goddess herself likes to take joy in my aggravation when I journey to these planets.
However, it seems that she has decided to be more lenient with me this time... this child does possess the gift... excellent...
"This is what I feared... your child does possess an abnormal variant of predator disease..." my apprentice said. She always knew what to say when it came to situations like these. And it appears to have worked once again, the gojid mother is distraught at this "revelation."
tears flowing from her, like a fountain, she is mourning the condition of her son... how amusing...
"no.... no.... no no no, please! Please tell me your wrong, I will have nothing if I lose him... He's all I have left..." the mother pleaded.
"I don't want this... protector please show that they're wrong with the results!"
I had to intervene; I don't want another... incident to occur. "I am sorry miss, but with the test kits we possess, it's impossible for a false positive..."
The mother looked even more sorrowful than before. "How long will the treatment be? Please tell me that I will see my son again..." she looked at us, concerned for the "condition" of her son.
"It will likely be uncurable" my apprentice spoke. "With the levels that our testing kit has given us, you he may remain in treatment for a long while, if not forever."
At last, the mother looked defeated. she held onto her son one last time, it would've been depressing, if my intention were as truthful as we had made it out. "my Sovil..." She whispered to her son. "I'm sorry..." And with that she gave us the child, and we left to our ship, traversing the endless space back to the academy to give the child a new purpose.
After a period of time, I contacted my master to inform him of our success. activating the hyper-com, I knelt and kneeled before my master. "My lord..." I began. "The journey was a success, we now travel from the cradle to the academy as we speak..."
My master, imposing as ever, merely stood. The coldness embracing me as the dark powers aminated from him.
"Excellent... You have done well my apprentice... But never mind the child for now, there is a much more concerning situation we must speak about..." My master spoke.
I froze. What could be more concerning than trying to keep the gift hidden from the population of the federation? What is there to fear so much, that it's must be prioritized more than growing our power?
"What is the concern, my master?" I began. "Has our order been discovered?"
My master merely adjusted himself. "No, it is a concern that was thought removed, and has now grown into a grievous tumor... the humans..."
The humans? They destroyed themselves so long ago... How have they returned? If this information is true- No, it is true. When it comes to information like this and will investigate it himself to acquire confirmation.
I just knelt there... "what should be done, my lord?" I inquired. "What shall we do to them if they possess the gift-?" "They do." He spoke, with so much coldness within his voice, that weaker species would've began an Immedient stampede.
"They have created an order for those who possess a corrupted version of the gift. Claiming that hey use 'the light' side of 'the Force,' and if they even discover our growing power, they will destroy it."
I was frozen... If they destroy us... No. I will not allow them to destroy everything we have built, everything we have struggled to claim for so long. I will not allow this. They will either join us, or they will die.
"What shall we do, my master? Surely, we can coax the Federation into eradicate them, as they have planned so long ago...?" It would be easy, after all our grasps on the powers of the Federation is deep... with just the word from my master, they will-
"No."
I stared blankly. No? It would be easy, especially with their primitive state.
"C-could you please clarify, my lord?" I asked. Surely, there has to be a proper reasoning behind it.
Once again, he readjusts himself, and begins. "The Federation has yet to discover their survival. If we act now and have a fleet go to exterminated them, questions will be raised. Those questions will continue, until the Federation discovers us, and our ultimate plans. We cannot act now... We will, I assure you my dark apprentice, but not right now. For now, we shall watch, and see what these Jedican do."
that was an understandable reason. This just proves my master's superiority over me. I we act now, we will become exposed. "So... what shall we do while we watch?" I asked, though I already knew the awnser.
"We shall continue to grow our numbers, compared to the humans, we are only at half strength. They have a ship traversing to Venil Prime as we speak, and I estimate they will arrive by [Tomorrow.] We must act fast, time is not on our side, bring the child here and will plan further with the dark council."
and with that he cut communication. He was right though, time wasn't on our side. I just hope the weak venlil will distract them long enough to plan our next move... who knows, maybe they will gorge themselves on the venlil long enough for the federation to discover them... the foreseeable future will be extremely tedious...

(26 M) Never dated, I find someone attractive but need a dating manual.
So for context I was fat growing up and I still am bet I've come a long way from super Obese to Fat so I was always insecure and never tried dating, even though I had good meaningful situationships I never persued it because of my insecurity.
At present I'm doing better physically and mentally got a decent job. I've recently reconnected with a (26 F) childhood friend (when we were toddlers) her dad and my dad were best friends, now my dad has passed god bless his soul. I find her really attractive had a great connection when we talked, we've had a similar upbringing, understand each other's culture and financial background. Green Flags everywhere :)
Now here's my concern: a) How do you realise when you know that you're in love with someone? I know it should be two ways but it's weird to understand what is that feeling. b) How do I bring this up? Like how do I ask her out? Or any other person if I feel attracted to. c) We've managed to exchange numbers and talked on voice calls but her number doesn't have WhatsApp which I kinda understood that she isn't interested and that's a subtle hint for my way out. We chat on Instagram :3
P.S. I don't think online dating is for me so my only way is to make meaningful connections in or outside my social connections.
But my main concern is point A and B.
Thank You.
Tl;dr: I like a girl but I've been never in the game so I don't understand when I know I've fallen for someone and how do I ask someone out.

Trying to pay off debt, but wife won’t get with the program.
Short explanation is, we have debt. I work and bring in the majority of our income. Wife has a small business she runs from home. She is the only employee and doesn’t pay herself a set salary. We have a baby due late July.
Up until now, she has overseen our finances and been in charge of saving for the coming baby. When we follow our budget, we should have around 1k left over each month. For the month of May, we went 4k over the budget. The only purchases I make are groceries. When I checked, I saw a large amount of Amazon purchases and large expenditures that consisted of maternity photos and other baby related things. I’m not even that upset that we spent that much over budget. I’m upset that that money was ”available” and none went toward paying off any of our debts.
When I confront her about these things she accuses me of “attacking” her, but if I just casually mention these things she brushes it off and says “it was an expensive month”.
I told her I wanted to split accounts and my income would handle the necessities while she could spend her money on everything else until she runs out. She threatened to file for divorce once the baby is born.
I don’t want to work my whole life away and always be in debt. How can I get her on the same page? She refuses to live below our means even though it would benefit us in the long term. I don’t know where to go from here.

I am very new to Blender and this is my first project. I hope the video and picture are enough.
Any help would be appreciated!
Vertex group
Video

What my title says. But guess what...I have a my partner whom I married in 2019, and the previous 17yrs we were dating as kids. We had our ups and downs, primarily because of me. Working nightlife I cheated alot and a few times we broke up.
But comes the realization that being with who you love is more important than casual sex, and in 2018 I proposed and 2019 we married. 2020, the year of Covid we welcomed our gorgeous daughter that May.
My wife is a CPA and has been working as such since 25. Myself, Ive worked nightlife: bartender, server, manager, GM as well as a banker for 3 years as I tried to get ky degree in Computer Science and through out I had a business in Graphic Design and Printing while also starting a Credit Card Processing company and somewhere through out all this was a business consultant with no degree to boast.
I hustle and my wife is a doer.
She always wanted to be married to me, and have children, a house of our own and comfort.
We have all but comfort. She works hard while taking care of our daughter. I became a controller during covid and It specialist at a construction company in NYC focused on SCA (public work for schools).
I work long hours because I am self taught. She works long hours because her boss is a busive.
We have it interestingly hard.
I dont complain she does. When I am working late hours she judges me. When she works late hours she has help: grandma.
I keep getting abused that she hates the life we have because of how much work it takes.
I cant begin to tell you how overly simplified the above is. But, I feel for her. And so I try and mostly do not fight with her about her feeling of dispair because I know she doesnt need stress. Yet, when im working until 4/5am doing IT work on a project for my company because I am alone and doing it for 5/6 straight days--she chooses to attck me.
Someone help?

I wear facial SPF everyday and like to reapply it midday in the summer. But it puts me off wearing foundation and powder because I don't want to spoil the make up. I've heard you can get spray facial sunscreen, but I'm a bit worried about coverage and how much UV protection it would offer. Does anyone have any recommendations of products they've used?