Alright I've seen multiple people underestimate fug and slayers. But i can't really blame them, fug is greatly misunderstood. So what is fug truly, well "IMO" fug isn't supposed to fight the whole Zahard empire, and neither are slayers supposed to fight fhs, that part to be exact is a complete joke. Fug is supposed to be the Grace family, so they are supposed to be as strong as a great family. To give you an example on how fug is actually strong and slayers are way cooler, I'm going to compare fug with the great family we know the most about right now; lo po bai.
Ok so now let's begin. Future baam vs truamerei: baam solos easily.
Kirin vs luslec; another easy fug win.
Slayers and stronger elders like Sophia and hellam vs branchheads ; fug wins again, but not as easily.
Normal elders Vs BH candidates and hatchlings; this one is hard, as i don't know how strong the rest of the elders are; so either fug wins extreme difficulty, or it's a draw.
Foot soldiers Vs soldiers; fodder doesn't matter.
This here shows you that fug is actually strong, it's just been misunderstood. The whole set itself against the Zahard empire isn't literal, plus fug has been able to stand their ground during genesis.
The final point i want to discuss is; fug slayers probably the most misunderstood bunch, that makes them look like clowns, and that is people think that they're supposed to fight fhs, sorry but who said that. There's no reason they are supposed to fight them, that's just people jumping to conclusions. Slayers are only supposed to fight BHs and they sure can do it. So the slayer title is actually cool.
Sorry for the rant, thank you for reading.

This may sound like I’m asking for a lot but i just love listening to music on apple music with the visualizer. It’s one of the main reasons i chose AM instead of spotify. I find it really satisfying following with the lyrics with the visualizer in the background.
For some reason it doesn’t seem to work on the xbox version.
I figured I’d go to the web version instead but it wont play songs at all. If there’s some sort of way to enable or fix it atm it would be neat to know.

Apologies for the length and lateness of this post, past few months have been quite chaotic and haven't had much access to the internet, I dunno when I'll be back on this sub again after this so until then, more posts from me will be a Dream for Spring Summer (probably)
Over the years I've read a great many theories about the character of Varys, his motivations, his scheming throughout the series and his endgame, but none of them have ever truly sat well with me for how much his character feels simplified. He is one of ASOIAF's most complex characters who I still believe we haven't entirely cracked yet, and I for one still believe even after writing this post up and reflecting on it, there's still some of his character that I haven't figured out.
However, I want to propose an alternative character analysis to the character of Varys, one that drifts away from the more common take on his character - Varys is not a eunuch or a friend of Tyrion Lannister, and has spent his entire life lying about his manhood to deter anyone from thinking that he could father any children, so that fAegon, his true son, would always be protected while hiding.
Let us begin by breaking down each of the lies that define his character.
First, the lie that he was castrated as a young slave and had his manhood thrown into a fire by 'a certain man', which resulted in the fire turning magically blue and 'a voice' speaking out to Varys.

"One day at Myr, a certain man came to our folly. After the performance, he made an offer for me that my master found too tempting to refuse. I was in terror. I feared the man meant to use me as I had heard men used small boys, but in truth the only part of me he had need of was my manhood. He gave me a potion that made me powerless to move or speak, yet did nothing to dull my senses. With a long hooked blade, he sliced me root and stem, chanting all the while. I watched him burn my manly parts on a brazier. The flames turned blue, and I heard a voice answer his call, though I did not understand the words they spoke. "The mummers had sailed by the time he was done with me. Once I had served his purpose, the man had no further interest in me, so he put me out. When I asked him what I should do now, he answered that he supposed I should die. To spite him, I resolved to live. I begged, I stole, and I sold what parts of my body still remained to me. Soon I was as good a thief as any in Myr, and when I was older I learned that often the contents of a man's letters are more valuable than the contents of his purse. "Yet I still dream of that night, my lord. Not of the sorcerer, nor his blade, nor even the way my manhood shriveled as it burned. I dream of the voice. The voice from the flames. Was it a god, a demon, some conjurer's trick? I could not tell you, and I know all the tricks. All I can say for a certainty is that he called it, and it answered, and since that day I have hated magic and all those who practice it. If Lord Stannis is one such, I mean to see him dead." - ACOK - TYRION X

Now there is much from this excerpt to raise complaints and questions about Varys' story;

• There are no known instances of individuals being mutilated and having their mutilated parts being sacrificed in the flames for the sake of blood magic or appeasing R'hllor. Individuals have often been sacrificed to the flames, but sacrificed in their whole bodies.
  
• The details of how Varys was mutilated and that he was able to survive is unbelievable, and even more unbelievable that he went on to live as an orphan on the streets after this horrific ordeal with little to no medical treatment. Varys' simple claim that he "resolved to live" is very vague.
  
• Varys can remember this mystic and mysterious voice, but not what it send or what the words sounded like. Melisandre claims to hear the voices of R'hllor in the flames and voices could be heard from Drogo's tent when Mirri Maz Duhr was performing her blood magic, but these voices are only heard by the sorcerers, and not the victims. By all accounts, Varys should not have been able to hear these voices, if part of himself was fed to the flames.
  

But the weakest part of all is that Varys says that he "hates magic and all those who practise it", yet he goes to great lengths to protect and look out for Daenerys, and try to join fAegon's forces with hers, despite knowing that she has three magical dragons by her side.

"How many days until we reach the river?" he asked Illyrio that evening. "At this pace, your queen's dragons will be larger than Aegon's three before I can lay eyes upon them." "Would it were so. A large dragon is more fearsome than a small one." The magister shrugged. "Much as it would please me to welcome Queen Daenerys to Volantis, I must rely on you and Griff for that. I can serve her best in Pentos, smoothing the way for her return. So long as I am with you, though … well, an old fat man must have his comforts, yes? Come, drink a cup of wine." - ADWD - TYRION II

Illyrio is Varys' best friend and closest confidant, who he works with to protect Daenerys for much of her life and is willing to crown her as Queen alongside fAegon even though she has magical fire-breathing dragons that Varys, a victim of magical flames, would despise.
Illyrio, the same man who praised R'hllor, a God that Varys despises;

Her brother was waiting in the cool of the entry hall, seated on the edge of the pool, his hand trailing in the water. He rose when she appeared and looked her over critically. "Stand there," he told her. "Turn around. Yes. Good. You look …" "Regal," Magister Illyrio said, stepping through an archway. He moved with surprising delicacy for such a massive man. Beneath loose garments of flame-colored silk, rolls of fat jiggled as he walked. Gemstones glittered on every finger, and his man had oiled his forked yellow beard until it shone like real gold. "May the Lord of Light shower you with blessings on this most fortunate day, Princess Daenerys," the magister said as he took her hand. He bowed his head, showing a thin glimpse of crooked yellow teeth through the gold of his beard. "She is a vision, Your Grace, a vision," he told her brother. "Drogo will be enraptured." - AGOT - DAENERYS I

Neither Viserys or Daenerys were followers of R'hllor at this point, or surrounded by any followers, meaning Illyrio didn't need to bring up this form of prayer to R'hllor unless it was genuine or near genuine on his own part.
It makes little sense that Varys would entertain the company of those who worship R'hllor or magical forms of fire, if Varys truly is traumatised by what seemingly happened to him as a slave child by fire.
As well as Illyrio, this is apparent in Aerys II, who would regularly burn people in the throne room with wildfire, in the presence of Varys;

Frustrated, Aerys turned to the Wisdoms of the ancient Guild of Alchemists, who knew the secret of producing the volatile jade green substance known as wildfire, said to be a close cousin to dragonflame. The pyromancers became a regular fixture at his court as the king's fascination with fire grew. By 280 AC, Aerys II had taken to burning traitors, murderers, and plotters, rather than hanging or beheading them. The king seemed to take great pleasure in these fiery executions, which were presided over by Wisdom Rossart, the grand master of the Guild of Alchemists...so much so that he granted Rossart the title of Lord and gave him a seat upon the small council. - TWOIAF - THE TARGARYEN KINGS - AERYS II

Not only would Varys be present to witness these burnings, but Varys even encouraged Aerys to burn other individuals suspected of treachery, and fuelled both Aerys' paranoia and bloodlust;

He floated in heat, in memory. "After dancing griffins lost the Battle of the Bells, Aerys exiled him." Why am I telling this absurd ugly child? "He had finally realized that Robert was no mere outlaw lord to be crushed at whim, but the greatest threat House Targaryen had faced since Daemon Blackfyre. The king reminded Lewyn Martell gracelessly that he held Elia and sent him to take command of the ten thousand Dornishmen coming up the kingsroad. Jon Darry and Barristan Selmy rode to Stoney Sept to rally what they could of griffins' men, and Prince Rhaegar returned from the south and persuaded his father to swallow his pride and summon my father. But no raven returned from Casterly Rock, and that made the king even more afraid. He saw traitors everywhere, and Varys was always there to point out any he might have missed. So His Grace commanded his alchemists to place caches of wildfire all over King's Landing. Beneath Baelor's Sept and the hovels of Flea Bottom, under stables and storehouses, at all seven gates, even in the cellars of the Red Keep itself. - ASOS - JAIME V

Varys developed a reputation for egging on Aerys' paranoia and encouraging him to execute apparent traitors by fire, so much so that people like Barristan lay chief blame for Aerys' downfall into madness on Varys for exploiting it;

"It is not a question of wanting. The throne is mine, as Robert's heir. That is law. After me, it must pass to my daughter, unless Selyse should finally give me a son." He ran three fingers lightly down the table, over the layers of smooth hard varnish, dark with age. "I am king. Wants do not enter into it. I have a duty to my daughter. To the realm. Even to Robert. He loved me but little, I know, yet he was my brother. The Lannister woman gave him horns and made a motley fool of him. She may have murdered him as well, as she murdered Jon Arryn and Ned Stark. For such crimes there must be justice. Starting with Cersei and her abominations. But only starting. I mean to scour that court clean. As Robert should have done, after the Trident. Ser Barristan once told me that the rot in King Aerys's reign began with Varys. The eunuch should never have been pardoned. No more than the Kingslayer. At the least, Robert should have stripped the white cloak from Jaime and sent him to the Wall, as Lord Stark urged. He listened to Jon Arryn instead. I was still at Storm's End, under siege and unconsulted." He turned abruptly, to give Davos a hard shrewd look. "The truth, now. Why did you wish to murder Lady Melisandre?" - ASOS - DAVOS IV

It makes very little sense that Varys, a eunuch who seemingly hates worshippers of R'hllor and pyromancers for burning people and sacrificing his manhood to the flames as a child, would be best friends with a man who praises R'hllor or encourage his previous King to burn several people, many of whom were likely innocent of the claims of treachery put against them.
But it makes a lot more sense that Varys actually never had a problem with R'hllor or wildfire, and instead chose to encourage Aerys' paranoia so that he would always both seem useful to Aerys and be on good relations with him, to solidify his position of power on the Small Council, given that he was just a young foreign man in Westeros and wholly dependent on Aerys' support to maintain his standing in King's Landing.
The second lie of Varys' character that I wish to tackle is his apparent concern for the wellbeing of children;

"No," Ned pleaded, his voice cracking. "Varys, gods have mercy, do as you like with me, but leave my daughter out of your schemes. Sansa's no more than a child." "Rhaenys was a child too. Prince Rhaegar's daughter. A precious little thing, younger than your girls. She had a small black kitten she called Balerion, did you know? I always wondered what happened to him. Rhaenys liked to pretend he was the true Balerion, the Black Dread of old, but I imagine the Lannisters taught her the difference between a kitten and a dragon quick enough, the day they broke down her door." Varys gave a long weary sigh, the sigh of a man who carried all the sadness of the world in a sack upon his shoulders. "The High Septon once told me that as we sin, so do we suffer. If that's true, Lord Eddard, tell me … why is it always the innocents who suffer most, when you high lords play your game of thrones? Ponder it, if you would, while you wait upon the queen. And spare a thought for this as well: The next visitor who calls on you could bring you bread and cheese and the milk of the poppy for your pain … or he could bring you Sansa's head. - AGOT - EDDARD XV

Varys shows apparent disgust at the murders of Rhaegar's children, Rhaenys and Aegon, at the end of Robert's Rebellion, and the way in which they were brutally murdered.
However, we later learn in the series that Aegon seemingly survived and was swapped with a tanner's child, bought by Varys and swapped with Aegon, so that this bought child could be sacrificed to the Lannisters, who Varys presumed would want to kill Rhaegar's children;

"A true friend, our Lord Connington. He must be, to remain so fiercely loyal to the grandson of the king who took his lands and titles and sent him into exile. A pity about that. Elsewise Prince Rhaegar's friend might have been on hand when my father sacked King's Landing, to save Prince Rhaegar's precious little son from getting his royal brains dashed out against a wall." The lad flushed. "That was not me. I told you. That was some tanner's son from Pisswater Bend whose mother died birthing him. His father sold him to Lord Varys for a jug of Arbor gold. He had other sons but had never tasted Arbor gold. Varys gave the Pisswater boy to my lady mother and carried me away." "Aye." Tyrion moved his elephants. "And when the pisswater prince was safely dead, the eunuch smuggled you across the narrow sea to his fat friend the cheesemonger, who hid you on a poleboat and found an exile lord willing to call himself your father. It does make for a splendid story, and the singers will make much of your escape once you take the Iron Throne … assuming that our fair Daenerys takes you for her consort." - ADWD - TYRION VI

This entire "splendid story" as Tyrion calls it, is full of inconsistencies and unbelievable acts.
The first red flag of this story is the idea that Varys, a former slave child who abhors slavery, would willingly buy another man's young child. Also pay attention to the mention of 'Arbor gold', which has been well documented on this sub for years for how its always a signal of lies, as individuals like Littlefinger mention it in passing whenever they are telling a lie.
The second red flag is the idea that Varys, someone who seemingly abhors the murder and suffering of innocent children, would willingly sacrifice an innocent young child and allow them to be murdered just to spare another, more valuable child. The idea that Varys would also take Elia's child away from her, either willingly or unwillingly on her part, is also questionable.
The third red flag is why Varys chose only to switch Aegon with another child, and not do the same for Rhaenys. Having two imposter Targaryen children raised to believe they are Targaryens could've helped to support their claims, build them up as a rival power in Westeros and also provide a backup option for Varys incase fAegon didn't survive his childhood.
The final red flag is the idea that Varys was able to foresee how the Rebellion was going to end, accurately guessed that Rhaegar's children would be murdered by the Lannisters, knew where and when to find Elia and her children, be able to remove one of her children away from her without anyone knowing, and knew that one of Tywin's men would kill the children so brutally that next to no one would be able to recognise them - the idea story is built on a series of flimsy conveniences and incredible predictive abilities on Varys' part.
If Varys truly cared so much about the protection and well-being of children, he would not have willingly bought and sacrificed an innocent child to be sacrificed in exchange for Aegon's survival, nor would he have abandoned Rhaenys to her fate if he could have prevented it. This means either Varys truly doesn't give a damn about the wellbeing of children and just lies to the likes of Ned and Tyrion about it, or that the entire story about Aegon being swapped with a tanner's child is a lie like some fans believe, or that both stories are lies muddled together to make it more difficult to discern the truth.
Perhaps the truth of Varys' lies is best exposed in this often cited excerpt from ACOK, a conversation between him and Tyrion about the infamous "Shadow on the Wall" riddle;

Varys smiled. "Here, then. Power resides where men believe it resides. No more and no less.""So power is a mummer's trick?" "A shadow on the wall," Varys murmured, "yet shadows can kill. And ofttimes a very small man can cast a very large shadow." Tyrion smiled. "Lord Varys, I am growing strangely fond of you. I may kill you yet, but I think I'd feel sad about it." - ACOK - TYRION II

The question of who Varys refers to in this conversation has been debated for years on this sub. Some believe that Varys was alluding to fAegon, that if people believe he is the real Aegon then he will have power, even if he doesn't truly have power as a common non-Targaryen child. Others have suggested Varys was alluding to Littlefinger, who was once a young small man who rose very high in King's Landing and cast a large shadow over the realm by starting the WotFk through his schemes.
I however believe that Varys is talking about himself.
Varys was once a very small man when he came to King's Landing at Aerys' calling for him to join the Small Council. He was seen as a young ex-slave, without a lordship or house of his own, weak and powerless. But overtime, through his manipulation of Aerys, encouraging his paranoia and own self-inflicted downfall, Varys cast a very large shadow over the empire of House Targaryen in Westeros, and destroyed it forever. What Varys says here to Tyrion is a very veiled threat that he can be dangerous to Tyrion if he underestimates Varys.
Tyrion however, in his arrogance, believes that Varys is referring to him, being a "very small man" and begins considering him a friend.
This is the third and final lie of Varys' character that I wish to dissect here - the lie that he is a friend or useful ally of sorts to Tyrion.
The idea of Varys betraying Tyrion's trust and working against him is first presented to us by Cersei, when she lets slip that Varys informed her of Tyrion's plan to send the Hound into battle at the Battle of the Blackwater;

"Varys says so." The swan was too rich for his taste. A line appeared on Cersei's pale white brow, between those lovely eyes. "You put too much trust in that eunuch." "He serves me well." "Or so he'd have you believe. You think you're the only one he whispers secrets to? He gives each of us just enough to convince us that we'd be helpless without him. He played the same game with me, when I first wed Robert. For years, I was convinced I had no truer friend at court, but now . . ." She studied his face for a moment. "He says you mean to take the Hound from Joffrey." - ACOK - TYRION XII

On a first read, we are quick to dismiss Cersei's claims for how much she is built up as an antagonistic and untrustworthy character, but in later understanding her motives in her own POV chapters, we realise there may be an inkling of truth in her claims. In the case of the Hound, Varys has no reason to inform her of Tyrion's plan, however innocent and insignificant in the grand game of thrones they may be, other than to maintain some level of trust with her and to invoke conflict between the Lannister siblings, which benefits Varys.
There are frequent moments throughout the series in which Varys alludes to knowing key information and deliberately withholding it from Tyrion even if it may benefit Tyrion, including who ordered Mandon Moore to kill Tyrion;

Bronn had turned up all he could on Ser Mandon, but no doubt Varys knew a deal more . . . should he choose to share it. "The man seems to have been quite friendless," Tyrion said carefully. "Sadly," said Varys, "oh, sadly. You might find some kin if you turned over enough stones back in the Vale, but here . . . Lord Arryn brought him to King's Landing and Robert gave him his white cloak, but neither loved him much, I fear. Nor was he the sort the smallfolk cheer in tourneys, despite his undoubted prowess. Why, even his brothers of the Kingsguard never warmed to him. Ser Barristan was once heard to say that the man had no friend but his sword and no life but duty . . . but you know, I do not think Selmy meant it altogether as praise. Which is queer when you consider it, is it not? Those are the very qualities we seek in our Kingsguard, it could be said—men who live not for themselves, but for their king. By those lights, our brave Ser Mandon was the perfect white knight. And he died as a knight of the Kingsguard ought, with sword in hand, defending one of the king's own blood." The eunuch gave him a slimy smile and watched him sharply. Trying to murder one of the king's own blood, you mean. Tyrion wondered if Varys knew rather more than he was saying. - ASOS - TYRION II

When Tyrion presses Varys for information about Mandon, Varys deliberately skims over Mandon's life and offers vague beliefs about the perfect Kingsguard to try and derail Tyrion's line of questioning, and when Varys pretends not to have known about Mandon trying to kill Tyrion, he watches Tyrion "sharply" to try and gather how much Tyrion himself knows, whether or not Tyrion will seek retribution for it from the anger on his face, and almost openly mocks him for the smile he gives. Tyrion briefly considers the idea that Varys is deliberately holding information back from him, but chooses instead to talk about other matters, which is what Varys wanted.
On the matter of Varys' choosing to support the Lannisters or Stannis, Varys once again tries to confuse Tyrion with riddles and not directly answer the question;

"He accuses my brother and sister of incest. I wonder how he came by that suspicion." "Perhaps he read a book and looked at the color of a bastard's hair, as Ned Stark did, and Jon Arryn before him. Or perhaps someone whispered it in his ear." The eunuch's laugh was not his usual giggle, but deeper and more throaty. "Someone like you, perchance?" "Am I suspected? It was not me." "If it had been, would you admit it?" "No. But why should I betray a secret I have kept so long? It is one thing to deceive a king, and quite another to hide from the cricket in the rushes and the little bird in the chimney. Besides, the bastards were there for all to see." - ACOK - TYRION III

We know for certain that Varys didn't want the WotFK to start so soon or for the truth of Cersei's children to come out in AGOT because he wanted more time for Viserys' forces to grow in strength and come closer to Westeros in order to invade, either to take the throne for themselves or be the ones to kill the beloved Robert Baratheon and paint themselves as villainous usurpers to make fAegon more heroic and not taint him with Robert's blood on his hands.
However, like with Cersei and Tyrion, Varys needs to tell those on the Small Council a certain amount of secretive information in order to gain their trust and support, including Stannis. That Varys even chooses to give a deeper and more unsettling laugh about the matter is another example of him openly laughing about his treachery in Tyrion's face and Tyrion not realising it.
When Tyrion almost stumbles upon this ruse and Varys realises that his laugh was too deep and questionable, Varys tries to brush it off by saying its harder to keep a secret secret if so many people are investigating it, and insists that there were so many of Robert's bastards to find for Stannis to figure out the truth on his own. But again, this last statement from Varys is littered with half-truths.
Varys insists it is hard to keep deceiving King Robert about the truth of his children's true parentage, and even harder to keep deceiving the truth from those who are deliberately looking for the truth and wanting to find it. This in itself is a reference to his believe that Stannis was always power-hungry for the Iron Throne, and was just looking for an excuse to try to claim it for himself as Robert's true heir, regardless of whether or not Cersei's children were Robert's or not.
But his own comment about "betraying a secret I have held for so long" is a direct allusion to fAegon's existence, and his determination not to reveal the truth of his existence to anyone, including Tyrion.
Even when Tyrion rides with Illyrio and Jon Connington's entourage in ADWD, Tyrion is only led to believe that they are going to support Daenerys' claim for the Iron Throne, and has to work out for himself that fAegon is actually Aegon and the one Varys and Illyrio wish to crown;

Young Griff hesitated. "Lannister? Your father—" "—is dead. At my hand. If it please Your Grace to call me Yollo or Hugor, so be it, but know that I was born Tyrion of House Lannister, trueborn son of Tywin and Joanna, both of whom I slew. Men will tell you that I am a kingslayer, a kinslayer, and a liar, and all of that is true … but then, we are a company of liars, are we not? Take your feigned father. Griff, is it?" The dwarf sniggered. "You should thank the gods that Varys the Spider is a part of this plot of yours. Griff would not have fooled the cockless wonder for an instant, no more than it did me. No lord, my lordship says, no knight. And I'm no dwarf. Just saying a thing does not make it true. Who better to raise Prince Rhaegar's infant son than Prince Rhaegar's dear friend Jon Connington, once Lord of Griffin's Roost and Hand of the King?" "Be quiet." Griff's voice was uneasy. - ADWD - TYRION V

After Tyrion works out the truth and manipulates both fAegon and Jon Connington into riding for Westeros instead of joining forces with Daenerys, he disappears and goes off to seek her out.
This likely angers Varys, and is the reason why Varys no longer affectionately calls Tyrion by his name or by '"lord" and instead refers to him as "the imp" in ADWD's epilogue, a term that Varys knows Tyrion hates;

Ser Kevan tried to rise, but the strength had left him. He could not feel his legs. "I thought the crossbow fitting. You shared so much with Lord Tywin, why not that? Your niece will think the Tyrells had you murdered, mayhaps with the connivance of the Imp. The Tyrells will suspect her. Someone somewhere will find a way to blame the Dornishmen. Doubt, division, and mistrust will eat the very ground beneath your boy king, whilst Aegon raises his banner above Storm's End and the lords of the realm gather round him." "Aegon?" For a moment he did not understand. Then he remembered. A babe swaddled in a crimson cloak, the cloth stained with his blood and brains. "Dead. He's dead." - ADWD - EPILOGUE

Varys chooses to frame Tyrion for Kevan's murder, **deliberately and intentionally further putting his life in danger by Cersei's wrath, already knowing that Tyrion has a large bounty on his head because of her, and talks lowly of Tyrion by calling him an "Imp" and referring to his "connivance" in a very scorned tone.
Varys never considered Tyrion a friend or ally in ASOIAF and was just using him, another lie that he tells throughout the series, and by the end of ADWD, he hates Tyrion for his scheming and knowing too much information than Varys wished him to know.
But there is a bigger telling point about how much Varys uses Tyrion, and a more ground-breaking twist in the narrative that reflects both how much Varys underestimates Tyrion and how much Varys never cared for him;
In ASOS, Varys didn't tell Tyrion how to reach the Tower of the Hand to go and kill Tywin. Varys told him this key information so that Tyrion could go and kill Shae instead, who Varys considered a greater threat to him.
Shae is one of the few, perhaps the only, people in ASOIAF to see through Varys' disguises;

A whiff of something rank made him turn his head. Shae stood in the door behind him, dressed in the silvery robe he'd given her. I loved a maid as white as winter, with moonglow in her hair. Behind her stood one of the begging brothers, a portly man in filthy patched robes, his bare feet crusty with dirt, a bowl hung about his neck on a leather thong where a septon would have worn a crystal. The smell of him would have gagged a rat. "Lord Varys has come to see you," Shae announced. The begging brother blinked at her, astonished. Tyrion laughed. "To be sure. How is it you knew him when I did not?" She shrugged. "It's still him. Only dressed different." - ACOK - TYRION X

This catches Varys off guard, and any chance of seeing him being angry or looking threatened is waved away from the reader when Tyrion laughs it off and turns his attention again to his paramour Shae.
Wearing disguises is a very important part of Varys' many schemes, including visiting Ned Stark in the Black Cells as the gaoler Rugen;

"Wine," a voice answered. It was not the rat-faced man; this gaoler was stouter, shorter, though he wore the same leather half cape and spiked steel cap. "Drink, Lord Eddard." He thrust a wineskin into Ned's hands. The voice was strangely familiar, yet it took Ned Stark a moment to place it. "Varys?" he said groggily when it came. He touched the man's face. "I'm not … not dreaming this. You're here." The eunuch's plump cheeks were covered with a dark stubble of beard. Ned felt the coarse hair with his fingers. Varys had transformed himself into a grizzled turnkey, reeking of sweat and sour wine. "How did you … what sort of magician are you?" - AGOT - EDDARD XV

His disguise as Rugen is very important to Varys' plans after Tyrion's disappearance from King's Landing, as Varys seeks to frame Rugen as a Tyrell puppet who broke Tyrion from imprisonment on the Tyrells' behalf, to sow division and further paranoia between Cersei and the Tyrells;

Gold, yes, but the moment Cersei took it she could tell that it was wrong. Too small, she thought, too thin. The coin was old and worn. On one side was a king's face in profile, on the other side the imprint of a hand. "This is no dragon," she said. "No," Qyburn agreed. "It dates from before the Conquest, Your Grace. The king is Garth the Twelfth, and the hand is the sigil of House Gardener." Of Highgarden. Cersei closed her hand around the coin. What treachery is this? Mace Tyrell had been one of Tyrion's judges, and had called loudly for his death. Was that some ploy? Could he have been plotting with the Imp all the while, conspiring at Father's death? With Tywin Lannister in his grave, Lord Tyrell was an obvious choice to be King's Hand, but even so . . . "You will not speak of this with anyone," she commanded. - AFFC - CERSEI II

But this ploy to incite conflict between the Lannisters and Tyrells would have failed if Shae had lived, as she had seen through Varys' disguises and could've warned Cersei of it, something which Varys could not allow, especially given that he considered her one of Cersei's pawns after Tyrion's trial.
It is also fundamentally not in Varys' interest for Tyrion to kill Tywin, as keeping Tywin alive for now would ensure the Dornish would have someone to rise up and seek vengeance against for Elia's murder. As readers are shown in AFFC and ADWD Dornish chapters, the Martells are divided and frankly confused about how to seek vengeance for Elia's murder now that Tywin, Gregor and Armory Lorch - the three men involved in her murder - are now dead. **If Tywin had lived, Varys could've played on the Dornish thirst for vengeance against him and had fAegon promise them it in exchange for their support, something which they likely would've agreed to.
So by this point in the post, we've explored some of the key lies of Varys' character to know for sure what he is not;

• He is not the victim of slavery or a sacrificial victim to magical fires, nor does he abhor those who worship R'hllor or magical flames
  
• He does not hate the killing and suffering of innocent children, and has actually sought to profit from it in the past
  
• He has never been a friend or ally to Tyrion Lannister but has instead used him, and even manipulated him into killing Shae to protect one of Varys' own future schemes
  

So who is the real Varys? Behind all of these lies and deceptions, who is he really deep down?
Well, Varys is not a eunuch, and in fact fAegon's true father by blood. Varys has deliberately spent his life lying about being a eunuch in order to discourage people from the truth that he is the father of fAegon by Illyrio’s sister, and wants to control the Iron Throne through fAegon.
Recall Varys' conversation with Tyrion in ACOK that I previously cited earlier;

"He accuses my brother and sister of incest. I wonder how he came by that suspicion." "Perhaps he read a book and looked at the color of a bastard's hair, as Ned Stark did, and Jon Arryn before him. Or perhaps someone whispered it in his ear." The eunuch's laugh was not his usual giggle, but deeper and more throaty. "Someone like you, perchance?" "Am I suspected? It was not me." "If it had been, would you admit it?" "No. But why should I betray a secret I have kept so long? It is one thing to deceive a king, and quite another to hide from the cricket in the rushes and the little bird in the chimney. Besides, the bastards were there for all to see." - ACOK - TYRION III

"Why should I betray a secret I have kept so long?" is the biggest hint towards fAegon's existence and Varys' own true motivations in the entire series. Varys makes this spur of the moment claim after being caught off guard by Tyrion and doesn't think it through before saying it and letting Tyrion realise there is more to him.
Varys was never castrated and he is not bald. He deliberately shaves his head to hide his true parentage and lies about being a eunuch to discourage people from believing that he is capable of fathering a child, a child with Blackfyre blood that he wishes to sit on the Iron Throne, a secret that Varys has cared for and kept so long.
The last time we see Varys in ADWD, he finally begins to tell the truth about fAegon's existence, and when he does, and speaks about the son he loves, he begins to speak in his real, deeper and non-emasculated voice;**

"Aegon?" For a moment he did not understand. Then he remembered. A babe swaddled in a crimson cloak, the cloth stained with his blood and brains. "Dead. He's dead." "No." The eunuch's voice seemed deeper. "He is here. Aegon has been shaped for rule since before he could walk. He has been trained in arms, as befits a knight to be, but that was not the end of his education. He reads and writes, he speaks several tongues, he has studied history and law and poetry. A septa has instructed him in the mysteries of the Faith since he was old enough to understand them. He has lived with fisherfolk, worked with his hands, swum in rivers and mended nets and learned to wash his own clothes at need. He can fish and cook and bind up a wound, he knows what it is like to be hungry, to be hunted, to be afraid. Tommen has been taught that kingship is his right. Aegon knows that kingship is his duty, that a king must put his people first, and live and rule for them." - ADWD - EPILOGUE

This is who Varys truly is - not a eunuch, not a victim of slavery or castration, not a man who weeps for the suffering of children, not a friend of Tyrion Lannister, but a loving father who wishes to cast a very large shadow over the greatest empire the world of ASOIAF has ever known.
TLDR:
Varys is not a eunuch but instead the father of fAegon, a secret he has spent his life protecting, and a lie he has spent his life telling to better protect his son.
Varys does not hate R'hllor or those who worship magical flames, his entire story about his manhood being sacrificed to flames is a lie he tells to gain Tyrion's trust in their efforts to defeat Stannis in ACOK. Varys is close friends with Illyrio, a man who praises R'hllor, and spent the early parts of his life encouraging Aerys to feed innocent people to the flames of wildfire.
Varys does not hate the suffering of innocent children, he was prepared to buy an innocent child from a man and sacrifice him in order to protect the "real" Aegon, he was prepared to abandon Rhaenys to her brutal death even if he could have saved her too and prepared to send Viserys and Daenerys into a doomed invasion of Westeros that would've led to their deaths just to make fAegon appear a more heroic saviour compared to them.
Varys was never a friend or ally to Tyrion but instead was using him ever since they first met. He has repeatedly withheld important information from him such as who hired Mandon Moore to kill Tyrion and how Stannis figured out the truth about Cersei's children, and on frequent occasions has nearly openly laughed in Tyrion's face at both his misfortune and the information Varys withheld from him. Varys also manipulated Tyrion into killing Shae so that she would not expose Varys' identity as Rugen and didn't trust Tyrion with the information about fAegon's existence, something that Tyrion had to figure out himself. Varys also talks lowly of Tyrion at the end of ADWD as a "conniving Imp" which reflects Varys' true feelings about Tyrion.
Varys has spent his life shaving his hair and lying about being a eunuch to discourage anyone from believing he could father fAegon and better protect him, so that fAegon could one day take the Iron Throne, and cast a very large shadow over the Targaryen Empire forever.
Thanks for reading, if you enjoyed this theory be sure to read some of my other theories below;
All the signs that Tywin directly gave the Mountain the order to badly mistreat Elia Martell
The Father Rhaegaer, the Son Jon and the Holy Ghost Ghost, religious symbolism
Mance Rayder is a servant of the Others
Leyton Hightower is the Lord of Light and Malora Maid is Quaithe
2022 archive of ASOIAF theories available at the bottom of this post

A/N: I just can't stop it seems. Please send help before I fry my brain coming up with these stories! But here's a short one for you all, enjoy!
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It had been many, many long decades since humanity had last been drawn into a war they would surely win. It had been hard fought though, their many victories snatched from the jaws of defeat on countless occasions, not just thanks to their own tenacity and expertise in warfare, but also thanks to their more supernatural allies, many of which were former humans. Werewolves, vampires, eldritch deities, ghosts bound to VHS tapes and of course the [REDACTED]. All had risen to fight the Empire, to defy the Ur’ad, and to secure humanity's future once again.
But this is not a tale of war, no no. This is a tale of some idiot criminals who decide it’s a good idea to mess with humanity yet again. A group of fools who have found an exceedingly human dwelling nestled deep within a lush, vibrant forest just as the suns began their descent. It was a quaint little house, only two stories tall but large enough for an average human family. There was a well maintained garden that wrapped around the front and side of the house, a small pond on the opposite side filled with aquatic lifeforms of less than sapient nature.
It was an idyllic place for a home, one that knew peace and joy. What was about to happen would be a very small bump on an otherwise smooth road. The criminals, low level gangsters with barely a braincell between them, were part of an equally idiotic gang that somehow, for all its poor choices, had managed to survive long enough to garner a reputation as being so incompetent they managed to be competent, as paradoxical as that may be. Having gotten lost in the forest while out on patrol, they had stumbled upon the home and decided that it was the perfect target for a good old time of breaking and entering. Maybe they could find something of value, after all anyone living this far from the city must surely be protecting something.
So, the five gangers sat on their haunches, their snouts sniffing the air and detecting something that didn’t seem quite right, but they had neither the foresight to figure it out, nor the willingness to do so in the first place.
Finally they decided it was time to put their vague outline of a plan in motion, it was dusk and that meant the humans would be growing more and more tired with every passing moment, thus it’d be the perfect time to strike as the denizens within could not even hope to resist as well as they normally would be able to. So the group began to creep forwards, falling onto all fours for better sneaking.
They were Un’el, scavengers. They most resembled hyenas with scales. They were not the most intelligent or innovative species, but they made good use of what intelligence they did have as early in their history their homeworld was used as a junkyard for anything the rest of the galaxy didn’t want or need anymore. At the time, nobody even knew they existed, so it was quite the surprise when all of a sudden there were ships filled with unknown aliens taking off from the planet.
So here they were, creeping up on a perfect little home in a perfect but large forest. When they reached the door they did what criminals are known to do. They broke in. However, instead of picking the lock or simply attempting to open the door in the event it was unlocked, they kicked the door in, plasma weapons raised and snarls in their throats.
They expected the screaming of women and children, of the fierce bellowing of a male. Instead, they were greeted by a short, slightly plump human woman in a quaint little sundress and with a shawl around her shoulders. She briefly looked surprised by the sudden entry appearance of aliens forcing their way into her home, but it was quickly replaced with a soft smile and holding up a tray of what appeared to be cookies in her oven mitt clad hands.
“Well, it’s about time. I was beginning to think you boys weren’t going to come say hello. Cookie?” She said, her tone jovial and unperturbed. The gangers stood there, utterly confused by this response to their sudden entrance. “Shame about the door, but I suppose it’ll give Victor something to do, he’s been getting bored lately and that-”
“Give us all your valuables!” One of the gangers barked, and the human woman blinked, the tray lowering slightly.
“Why?” She said, and the gangers paused. Surely she knew why, they had the guns and the numbers, and whoever this Victor was wouldn’t stand a chance against them either, so it was clear that they should just do whatever the gangers said.
“Because… because we have guns! We kill you if you don’t give us what we want!” Another said, and the human woman blinked, then her eyes widened slightly.
“Ahhh… I was hoping those were just toys.” She murmured, before clearing her throat. “But to answer your demand for our valuables, no.”
“No!? We kill! Give us valuables or you die! We burn house down!” They barked some more and the woman simply sighed, shaking her head as she set the tray aside.
“And I said no. We’re not going to-” She didn’t get to finish, as her body was soon riddled with plasma bolts. The scent of burnt flesh filled the room and she dropped like a bag of bricks, a somewhat pained and surprised look on her face. The gangers yipped with delight and began scooping up anything of value when they heard a new voice, one that was decidedly male.
“Oooh cookies! Bridget you shouldn’t hav-” The man paused in the entryway, having appeared from a set of stairs near the front door. The gangers all froze, staring at him as he finished slipping into a shirt and nodded. “Well, I suppose this is a robbery isn’t it? And I can see you’ve already met my wife.” He said, the gangers all raising their weapons to aim at him.
He looked strange, deathly pale and somehow both old and young at the same time. It was the eyes it seemed, they held an ancientness to them that was impossible for any normal human to possess, yet his exterior was vibrant and youthful, if a bit pale.
“Kill you! Like kill wife!” The ganger who’d first fired upon Bridget yipped and the man, Victor, nodded with a shrug.
“Sure I suppose. Just one question before I’m so ruthlessly murdered in cold blood.” He said, and the Un’el glanced at one another before the leader of the group waved his gun in assent. “You didn’t use silver to kill her did you? Those look like plasma weapons to me.”
This confused the gangers, who all frowned and then the leader spoke up again.
“Why use silver? Plasma best kill-kill!”
“Well you see, silver is the only thing that can kill her. Otherwise all you’re doing is slowing her down and well… She gets mighty angry sometimes, as you’re about to discover.” Victor smiled, clasping his hands behind his back and flashing a set of immaculate teeth, two of which were far longer than they should have been. From behind the Un’el came a soft rumbling which promptly turned into a deep and menacing growl. As one they slowly turned and were forced to tilt their heads back as the once small and plump form of a human woman rose into and became a hulking, athletic mass of muscle and fur, her fingers capped with wicked claws and her mouth elongating into a maw filled with long, sharp teeth. “I’m afraid to say, but you’ve picked the wrong house lads.”
The leader of the group turned back, only to find Victor had crossed the distance between them in the blink of an eye, and that his mouth was open and descending for his neck. The tranquil stillness of the forest around the home was rudely shattered by the sound of gunfire and the roar of a werewolf, before it went quiet once more. The animals, which had been quiet in the face of imminent danger, resumed their chirping and squeaking, and all was well.
Not eight hours later, a human walked up the path to the house, the uniform and badge he wore declaring him as law enforcement. As he stepped up to the front door he noted it had been recently repaired, not that well but well enough to be functional at least. So carefully he knocked on it and the response was prompt, the door swinging open on squeaky hinges and presenting him with the ever youthful visage of Victor.
“Evening Victor.” He said, tipping his hat to the vampire, who smiled broadly and nodded back.
“Why good evening to you too, Officer Thomson. What seems to be the problem?” Victor asked, leaning against the doorframe a bit.
“No problem, just the same old same old. Say, we seem to have lost track of a group of ne’er do wells wandering around this area. You wouldn’t have happened to seen or heard anything would you?” Thomson asked, and Victor turned slightly, looking over his shoulder at his wife who was currently knelt on the floor, a brush in one hand and a toothpick in the other. When she saw the police officer she smiled and waved, all while scrubbing at the very large streaks of purple blood on the floor.
“Can’t say I have officer, though should we, you’ll be the first to know.” Victor said, smiling warmly and Thomson nodded, tipping his hat to Bridget as well before taking a step back.
“Thank you kindly, your cooperation is highly appreciated folks.” Thomson said, not at all disturbed by the grisly scene inside the house. He started back down the path, giving them a wave as he did. “Stay safe, ya hear?”
“Will do officer! Have a lovely evening!” Bridget called out, and the door closed as Victor went to help his wife clean up.
And so, once again there was peace and tranquility in the world. And the house in the forest would remain undisturbed for many years to come.

I read all over the web, and I'm expecting the same answer as anywhere else, however -
I am an admin in a facebook group. a couple if days ago it vanished. none of the admins or owner have any sort of access to it, no notifications or emails about it, noone's account has been hacked. it simply vanished. all links lead to a dead end, even through a google search which brings results from the group.
I have tried every which way to fund any trace or contact, but alas, I failed. I am hoping someone here might have some sort of clue on either finding a way to retrieve the group or understand what happened, or contacting someone within facebook.
any help will be appreciated!

Hello! I need help and so far I haven't been able to find it on the internet (or I may be searching it wrong).
I would want to know if Avalonia can display on a second screen. For context, I'm currently doing a project on food ordering (it's for our small restaurant) and we kind of want to make a not-quite-POS (It's not really a government-approved POS, it's more of a way to make our restaurant efficient, especially with regards to the orders and kitchen). The goal of my project is whenever an order is made, that order will be sent to the second screen.
I'm currently doing this in my Visual Studio 2022, and will be deploying this on my Raspberry Pi 400 - Raspberry Pi OS 64 bit.
I already made the code for the ordering and menu items. My only problem now is displaying a second screen. This wouldn't work:

 public MainWindow() { InitializeComponent(); var kitchenDisplay = new KitchenDisplay(SharedOrders); var screen = this.Screens.AllScreens.Count > 1 ? this.Screens.AllScreens[1] : this.Screens.Primary; kitchenDisplay.Position = new Avalonia.Point(screen.Bounds.X, screen.Bounds.Y); //kitchenDisplay.Left = bounds.Left; //kitchenDisplay.Top = bounds.Top; kitchenDisplay.Show(); } 

I may be doing this wrong as I'm really not that familiar yet with Avalonia. If anyone can help me or at least give me the insight to display the second screen. It would help me out a lot. Any help is greatly appreciated. Thank you so much!

The amount of racism I go through is unspeakable. It’s gotten to the point where I can’t interact nor like nor look at the comments of any type of media from my home country because all the comments are filled with disgusting insults and derisions towards us. There are entire pages with thousands of followers whom only aim was to attack, ridicule and taint our name, all of these done by other Muslims. I’m not even considered a human being nor a Muslim just for my nationality. It’s getting to the point where I sincerely want to cut off everyone who even mention to be Muslims because I know how they’d act.
I have a friend who was a great help with my deen, she’s really knowledgeable mashaallah and has directed me times and times again towards the correct Hadiths. Of course I sought help and advice from her which was basically twisted to make it like it’s my fault for being from my country and I should accept the insults and hide my identity.
My heart is filled with hatred, which is anti-Islamic and I’m sinning myself for not being able to forgive. But every time I look at a Muslim, I feel disgusted and scared, I know that once I introduce myself they’ll attack me. The only people who are nice and never hurt me in any way were sub-Saharans and South/South-East Asians without whom I probably would’ve fallen from Islam altogether.
I’d like to receive some advice to make sure to change my mentality if possible, but such things as “ignore them” won’t work.

You can make anything from mythical beasts to monsters of the dark or even create peaceful creations where the flowers bloom and life grows.
You can make this as dark as you want, so long as it's relatively friendly to (All-Audiences) as this is Lindertech Productions and I would like everything here to be seeable by all people without them having fear, if it's very gorey and such, put a label on it for the appropriate age for seeing gore and whatnot and I'll accept it in the challenge thing aswell.
Good luck and hope you have fun doing this, it's just a test run though. (by the way, you can put images in your comments that you put on here!)

Eithan, never shows up in any projections of the future unless he acts with outside information.
Several times throughout the series we see possible futures, mostly for Lindon get listed out, but none of them, even the ones after the gang gets together, ever brings up Eithan and his influence.
For example the three most likely options at the end of soul Smith for Lindons duel are as follows: Lindon runs away and dies, Lindon teams up with the Jai clan and dies, or Lindon makes a weapon that delivers a critical hit before he dies. While at the time this is supposed to set up how impossible this task is for Lindon, it's also worth noting that Lindon was already with Eithan when this report happened, so why was Lindon of all people more likely to run away then he was to succeed under Eithan, unless Eithan wasn't a consideration.
Later in sky sworn longhook is told that he would become a hero of red moon hall and go on to become the next sage in most futures. Untill he took a stroll with Eithan to check out that cool thing he wanted to show him.
In bloodline when Suriel shows Lindon the futures, we see a lot of yerin, and even a little bit of mercy being mentioned, but the ominpresent pain in Lindons side, is no where to be seen in any of those possible futures at least none that are mentioned.
The only time where Eithan was glimpsed in fate was when he acted on something that if he were just a regular underlord he wouldn't have known. In a bonus scene in unsouled we see that the reason Eithan heads out towards the desolate wilds is because he senses the abidan interference. Considering the raising of the pyramid didn't happen until after that point (I do believe) Eithan was acting on outside information. This is also roughly the time when malice sees a vision of the future showing Eithan ascending to monarch with 2-4 others one day. While its not confirmed thats exactly when malice saw it, I'd bet my life against a rats tail that it was the reason.
Idk if Eithans origin shroud helps him hide from fate or only hides the orfin of his existence, maybe it's just the fact that Eithan is good at not touching his will to the way, so it's naturally harder read him. But either way, once you realize that Eithans future is rarely predicted unlike others, despite his prominence in literally everyones shit, it just becomes another a piece of the picture will was building the whole time in these books.

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The body and brain take over in an effort to protect us and life is then experienced through the lens of traumatic stress—responding to our environment with reactions of fight, flight, or freeze. This is largely an automatic or unconscious response but can wreak havoc in our lives and relationships.
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As a trauma therapist, I support clients in navigating the healing process connected with trauma and reducing symptoms of traumatic stress. Together we determine a course of treatment that combines talk therapy, narrative therapy, and experiential practices such a mindfulness, grounding, brainspotting and body-centered approaches to release trauma stored in the body and the brain.
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Have you experienced a traumatic event?
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What often happens after a traumatic event is that everyday stress becomes amplified and we no longer feel equipped to meet the challenges of life or our overall functioning is compromised.
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Symptoms of traumatic stress can occur immediately following the event or may be delayed for weeks, months, or even years. They may be activated by a trigger in present day that reminds us (either consciously or unconsciously) of something associated with the trauma.
Symptoms of Traumatic Stress
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Arousal is the body, mind, and nervous system being on alert, sometimes called hypervigilance but sometimes it’s subtler. It might mean you are easily irritated, angered or feel anxious, unsafe, or uncomfortable in your own skin. You may have difficulty falling asleep or fall asleep easily only to awaken to the slightest sound and then have trouble returning to sleep. You may startle easily. Arousal might cause you to freeze or feel paralyzed by a sense of impending doom. You may have difficulty making decisions or taking action in your life.
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Avoidance is the feeling of wanting to run or turn away from your discomfort and seek relief from overwhelming thoughts and feelings. You may find yourself easily distracted or you have a tendency toward isolation. It may take enormous effort just to get out of bed and face the day. Addiction, substance use, and compulsive behaviors are common attempts to cope as the body and the unconscious seek to escape the intense discomfort associated with traumatic stress.
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Re-experiencing the trauma may come in the form of nightmares, flashbacks or the body in some way reliving the trauma. You may experience confusion between past and present. You may be haunted by a sense of responsibility for what happened, replaying the situation over and over, thinking “if I had just done x y or z, this terrible thing would not have happened”. This is a protective way the mind is trying to make sense of what’s happened and experience some sense of control over the powerlessness of the reality that something devastating did occur.
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I had a great time riding a Dutch city bike in Amsterdam and wanted to try to get one in the USA. Does anyone know the best way to either buy the parts online and build one or if there is a website to buy a good Dutch city cruiser bike for under 500$

What would be the best way to play up the haunted haven flaw with the hecata? Im a brand new ST and trying to build my first chronicle. Right now my only ideas are that the character chose the haven because of the flaw but have failed to actually control or understand it and refuse to leave even if its to their detriment if they stay, or they accidentally caused the haunting following moving in and roughly the same stubborn refusal to give up even though it makes their haven less safe.

I was reading this sub the other day and one comment struck out to me, "according to experiencers of abduction, the medical procedures produced extreme discomfort that even doctors of the 1980s could easily do without discomfort."
This got me thinking. When I was younger my father and family had livestock. I remember witnessing 'cutting' or neutering of pigs, and it was a bloody affair. This produced incredible pain for the pigs. We do possess the technology to make this more comfortable for the pigs, but due to restraints such as time and money the alternative was ignored. In addition, my family was skilled in the process.
I could give other examples of the way that humans treat livestock but I think this illustrates my point. The discomfort produced is not because aliens do not have the technology, it is because of whatever reason be it time or resources, they do not perceive us as their equals.

In October of last year, I got a new job and loved it. I was so happy and loved what I was doing and was getting so much praise. I met so many people, and even made a new friend. 3 months ago was when my life completely started to fall apart, and I feel like it just keeps on getting worse and I don’t know what to do anymore and honestly, I just want to end things.
To start, I was sexually assaulted in march by a coworker I thought was my friend. This spiraled me into a depression, and I couldn’t even get out of bed. I went to the police, of course nothing was done and he got to still keep his job while I had no choice but to lose mine. (He’s still harassing woman at my old workplace btw, I keep in contact with an old coworker.) I couldn’t go back and I remained unemployed for a couple months. While being unemployed, I reached out to my friend that I made at my old workplace and she pretty much didn’t believe my situation. She yelled at me, told me she’s had it worse, and told me to “suck it up.” So I lost someone I thought was a really good friend as well.
I ended up getting a therapist and got diagnosed with PTSD. It’s been rough, and I find it hard to heal since I can’t talk about it without getting scared and anxious. I don’t know how to cope with it personally.
I found another job last month that paid really well, but I recently lost it because of unforeseen circumstances in the workplace which was starting to make me miserable.
I cannot stop drinking. The only way I feel better is when I drink, and I know it’s problematic and I’m starting to develop alcoholism probably.
So yes. I cannot with this year. Not to mention inflation is insane and I can barely afford to survive anymore. The only person and things that are making my life bearable is my girlfriend and my two little zebra finches. Other than that, it’s something I feel is not going to get better. Once again I’m unemployed, struggling with PTSD and drinking problems, and find it difficult to just live. I’m 23 years old and I feel like my life is already ending. Am I overthinking? Or am I just doomed? I can’t go back to sleep so I decided to type all my feelings out if anyone just wants to listen to this.

The piety requirements seem to be very high is there a way to get that much piety early on?

Pretty simple. I’ll do 3 hours of cardio/walking/jogging every day in addition to my lifting. If I don’t go on a 20-30 min speed walk or jog after each meal and periodically through the day then gas and waste builds up and I feel an even greater need to do sprints or some intense exercise to get my body processing the foods or els it sits in my upper abdomen and I get constipated. My stool is always liquid but still I have I complete evacuation.
Would intentionally adding bulk/binding my stool make it easier moved through my intestines?
I’ve lost tremendous weight because I basically have to do work all my food off and get my heart rate high after each meal. I dread eating because I know it comes with the need to do some hard exercise each time no matter if I’m tired or not. My daily life revolves around moving as much as I can and eating small frequent meals and the fact that I can’t trust my body to move food through my system without aid is a big issue. This happens with any food at all. Carbs, protein, fats, high and low fiber. Almost as if I can’t count in my stomach doing it’s job and I have to do many extra things to encourage my body to process food.