Skin and body refinery waco tx

Original Post: https://www.reddit.com/covidlonghaulers/comments/11ukhs4/nicotine_patches_experiment/
[Disclaimer]: This post doesn't suggest you should try nicotine patches. I am only sharing my experience.
TL:DR
This is the longest (3 weeks) I have felt a sense of normalcy since contracting covid over two years and a half ago.
Most symptoms I reported in my previous post have either disappeared or noticeably improved - for now.
Long covid symptoms (physical):
Decreased sensations (anhedonia) inability to sweat, 3 occasions of severe sleep apnea (waking up unable to breathe!) sb dermatitis every two weeks, dull fatigue, inability to drink alcohol, decreased libido, unrefreshed mornings, blurry vision, f****** brainfog, soft stool/diarrhea, muscle/weight loss, 3 episodes of out-of-nowhere panic attacks/sever anxiety (never knew what people talk about until I experienced them)
Improved symptoms, and for which I have had no relapse since stopping the patches 2 weeks ago are these:
Improved sleep, taste/smell, good vision, improved GI, less fatigue in general, improved libido (genitals feel more sensitive, less numb, and I certainly noticed more morning wood! lol), tactility (typing and writing has been a joy), anhedonia - I enjoy social interactions, music (caught myself singing at least 5 times...it's like I hear differently now...), thinking, jokes, etc more. In this department, something has definitely improved and it is noticeable.
Symptoms that returned:
2 or 3x 'impending doom' mornings
1x Seborrhic dermatitis breakout
You don't have to read the day to day notes below...it's more of a detailed breakdown and thoughts of mainly good things/improvements I experienced beyond the one week experiment - I thought I'd share them since I wrote them anyway...
And yes, I am still nervous to call this a win...very grateful, but still cautious
​
2 Weeks post experiment
Day 1

1. All good so far. Good night sleep, and I am actually feeling normal
2. Normal sensibilities are back
3. Great feeling of tactility

Retuning: NONE
​
Day 2
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1. Awesome sleep
2. Morning wood!
3. Taste and smell all good
4. Coffee tastes great.
5. I feel in the world
6. No more chesty cough
7. I read better, I savor it as I have always been....
8. Almost everything feels like baseline precovid me
9. I dared a glass of wine at 635PM. Let's see what happens tomorrow...

Returning
a. Skin flare up - sb, mild though
​
Day 3

1. Hmm..so I had wine yesterday and got away with it today, no crushing fatigue
2. All feel normal so far
3. No brainfog at all...
4. Taste/smell 10/10
5. Ah, if only coffee tasted this good always!
6. Improved GI symptoms
7. The walk in the rain from the car mechanic...the aromas and smells were left and right...almost had a flashback to the time I was in the US
8. 619PM, still, a great day...

Returning: None
​
Day 4

1. Good sleep
2. No brainfog
3. All good so far 906AM
4. Just feeling normal
5. Things I can certainly smell now: laundry machine, shampoo, after rain scents, ladies make-up as they pass by (lol)
6. I haven't experienced brainfog for a few days now
7. Excellent tactility feel since I first started the nicotine patches...

Returning: None
Day 5
​

1. Woke up refreshed, started dancing and singing ...wow
2. Vision 10/10, brainfog free, all good in the world so far
3. GI still good
4. Feeling social for the 11th day straight...again, there is more to life, and I don't find things and people empty
5. I am feeling the same 'lightness' I experienced following the vaccines: Energetic, and but somehow strangely light too (not a symptom though?)

Returning: None
​
Day 6

1. Good sleep
2. Smell and taste good
3. For the almost two weeks now, very good tactility

Returning
a. A bit of brainfog? Though not strong....that numbness in the forehead and temple areas..
b. SB dermatitis rash
​
Day 7

1. Tactility, emotional range... all good, taste, smell, visions...
2. Almost no brainfog
3. I feel my body...
4. Coughed up a bit of phlegm

Returning
a. Not a very refreshing morning - but still felt like singing and dancing...
b. Rash on my face is still there (it usually lasts 4 days to a week)
​
Day 8

1. All good so far
2. Very good sleep, smell, taste, tactility etc, all great (I mean normal good, and that is enough for me).
3. Vivid dreams
4. in the world...
5. Coffee tastes great

Retuning: None
​
Day 9

1. All good, still, smell taste, vision, no brainfog...

New
a. I passed out today at 230PM at a small funeral gathering... This the first time I ever pass out in my life. I don't associate this with nicotine patches, but with dehydration - I did not drink enough water the day before. Yesterday, I had two strong coffees, one strong black coffee, but no water. And today, by 2PM, I had three cups of coffee with little to no water. As an experience, this was very frightening and unique: First I felt a cramp in the intestines, which gave me the urge to go to the loo. Quickly that turned into into high temperature. I felt hot and thought I need to instead go out and get some air.. within 10-15 seconds, my legs and body felt heavy, the world started collapsing, and before I know it, I was unconscious...for 10-15 seconds they said...
But 10-5 minutes before this happens, I was eating some sandwiches, and I swear I could taste the different nuances in the variety we had. Even the coffee I was having minutes before this happens tasted outwardly...I could smell its aroma in the air intensely. Is this an instance of 'overstimulation of the vagus nerve'?
Day 10
​

1. All good again, no point in listing the good things...

Returning: None
Day 11

1. Refreshing sleep
2. Taste and smell are great, and I just enjoy food more

Returning
a. A bit of brainfog is back - but this could be the 4 - 5 hour motorway drive from the funeral
​
Day 12

1. Feeling good, tactility has improved.
2. Certainly having more morning woods since the patches
3. For two weeks now, I feel like listening to music and singing songs.

Returning
a. Brainfog, light, but that could be because of the travel last night, and the late dinner (920PM).
b. All else good
Day 13
​

1. All good (smell taste, vision, etc)

Returning: None
​
Day 14

1. All good (taste, smell, tactility, etc)

Retuning
a. Noticing blurry vision...but not deal breaking

Yesterday I saw that I had white blobs on my body: feet, legs, ass, arms, hands, abdomen, chest, neck, face and I’m pretty sure it’s on my back too —I can’t really see in the mirror or take a decent picture. Also I know how light work bc I’m an artist.
There are two types of blobs:

1. The whitest smaller blobs that seem to vary from 1-6 or 7cm length and breadth. (The biggest are on my abdomen I think)
   
2. The blobs that a just a few shades lighter than my skin and they’re huge. I can’t say how big they are but it looks like most of my body is covered in it(?)
   

Then it is my hair;
I’ve dyed my hair all the time since I was around 8 or 9, lately I’ve stopped because I dyed my hair black and decided to give it a break(that was before Halloween 2022)
Two days ago I looked at my hair and saw how gray/light it was at certain spots —my original hair color is dark brown and with sun it glitter(?) copper— at first I thought it was really light baby-hair even though my bb-hair is dark, but it goes to far in and my some of my eyelashes especially on left side is also grey/blond/white AND a blob is there on my skin. The blobs seem to aline with the hair.
Yes, I am aware that it could be the old dyes in my hair but not the new hai eyelashes.
Thank you.

I have Vitiligo or do I just need to see the sun more?
Yesterday I saw that I had white blobs on my body: feet, legs, ass, arms, hands, abdomen, chest, neck, face and I’m pretty sure it’s on my back too —I can’t really see in the mirror or take a decent picture. Also I know how light work bc I’m an artist.
There are two types of blobs:

1. The whitest smaller blobs that seem to vary from 1-6 or 7cm length and breadth. (The biggest are on my abdomen I think)
   
2. The blobs that a just a few shades lighter than my skin and they’re huge. I can’t say how big they are but it looks like most of my body is covered in it(?)
   

Then it is my hair;
I’ve dyed my hair all the time since I was around 8 or 9, lately I’ve stopped because I dyed my hair black and decided to give it a break(that was before Halloween 2022)
Two days ago I looked at my hair and saw how gray/light it was at certain spots —my original hair color is dark brown and with sun it glitter(?) copper— at first I thought it was really light baby-hair even though my bb-hair is dark, but it goes to far in and my some of my eyelashes especially on left side is also grey/blond/white AND a blob is there on my skin. The blobs seem to aline with the hair.
Yes, I am aware that it could be the old dyes in my hair but not the new hai eyelashes.
Thank you:)

Im sitting here as a 38 year old dude, wondering how in all heavens this show managed to claw itself so deep into my skin. It doesn’t feel logical. It’s just a show, it’s just a story right?
As a musician, I understand. I am also a songwriter and in this way I can pin point precisely why is it that every time I hear the songs or re-watch certain scenes I tear up. You see, the music they created for this show and the portrayal of the characters have true emotion. Emotion that reverberates through my brain and soul and body all the time. I think my friends would probably make fun of me because I am the burly, bearded type and the least they would expect is for me to be sobbing and reminiscing about the amazing story that unfolded in front of my eyes.
For me it’s the music that makes this different. The lyrics and the sheer amount of soul and emotion they poured into them.
I am in awe and I am happy. Props to everyone included in the making of this show. You made a burly dude get in touch with his emotions once more. Plus it was fantastic watching this with my wife.

I’ve always had acne but since I stopped taking the pill, it got worse. I now have microcysts and nothing seems to work on them, they just stay under the skin and sometimes get inflamed, but never leave. I tried epiduo, Differin gel and a tretinoin, but it doesn’t seem to work even if I try to be patient and stick with it for months. I tried applying hydrating cream before and after, but these affect my skin so much; it gets red and flaky and some patches get rough and leather like. My doctor don’t seem to take me seriously because I’ve got diagnosed with body dysmorphic disorder but the acne is definitely there, it affects me and I just want something to work for me.
Right now my night routine is : - double cleansing with Laroche posay toleriane cleanser for sensitive skin - corsx snail mucin or the inkey list hyaluronic acid serum - the inkey list omega water cream - Laroche posay toleriane ultra cream (when my skin gets flaky) - differin gel (once every two nights)
In the morning I just rinse my face with cold water, then serum, omega water cream, sometimes Laroche posay Effaclar+ tinted for red and inflamed cysts.
Do any of you recognize themself in what I’m experiencing? Have you gotten rid of your acne/microcysts and if so, how ?

I decided to group my two Venus scents by Arcana into one post instead of separating them. I believe that Venus Callipyge was part of a Valentine's Day collection (but please, don't quote me on it); if you are interested in Valentine's Day scents, I have reviewed a bunch of them here. Venus Perihelion was released during December two or three years ago? (I'm sorry but the Covid-19 years have erased my feeling for time because the last years are so blurred together.) It was for an astronomical event concerning the planet Venus.
Rating scale:
1 = 100% scrubber, 100% destash. Scrubbing either because I hate it or I get an allergic reaction.
2 = 100% destash because I don't like it and won't see myself reaching for it in the future.
3 = It's okay. I wouldn't mind getting it as a gift but I don't love it either.
4 = I like it. If it's a sample, I can see a full size in the future.
5 = Absolute love. Always full size, always back up.
​
Venus Callipyge
"Ripe, luscious peach halves and soft skin musk with amber, lime, frankincense, blackberry, sea salt, and white cognac."
Fun fact: Venus Callipyge is a Ancient Roman marble statue (you can find it in Naples) that's considered a copy from an Ancient Greek one. The entire name means "Venus of the beautiful buttocks"; yes, the marble has a nice behind.
The scent itself is also very beautiful as it's mostly a lime and peach scent with a hint of salt and frankincense on my skin. It's fruity and lighthearted without ending up in the bubblegum area or some sweet-sour candy rings. I don't get any amber or cognac but I'm not mad about it. 4/5
Venus Perihelion
"Opening with a burst of golden pineapple, this luxe, sensuous blend melts into a heart of the softest gardenia petals scattered over a base of glowing tree resins and French seaweed absolute."
Perihelion describes the point in orbit of a planet when its the closest to the sun. Comes from Greek and literally means "around [peri] the sun [helios]". The opposite would be Aphelion as it's the point at which the planet (or astronomical body) is the furthest from the sun.
Astronomy lesson aside, here are my thoughts about the scent itself: pineapple and white florals. The pineapple is fresh and has the typical tangy sweetness to it. The gardenia is the most prominent note of the scent and I got tiare vibes at the begin due to the pineapple. It deepens with time and becomes a more true gardenia scent including the peppery aspect. I have no idea if it's normal to smell a sharp, peppery aspect when it comes to gardenia but it's what my nose picks up. It's a very summery scent without being too fruity or sweet. 2/5

I'm an INTJ and if you have a nose ring, an Aries.. I know, you may exit the page now..
I'm a Software Engineer by trade for one of the largest companies in the world. If you have to guess, you've probably lost plenty of packages delivered by us, but you just keep coming back because of that free 2 day delivery. Also, we totally ruined the LOTR series. I'm also a plant dad by heart.
I love traveling, but expect that I look like a typical Asian tourist everywhere we go. You bet I'll do the Asian squat when taking pictures, negotiate the price of a Big Mac, and insist we arrive at the airport 3 hours before.
I'm also a huge foodie. One of my favorite things to do is to discover new restaurants and complain about not being given soy sauce at non Asian restaurants. By the way, soy sauce on pineapples. Try it. You getting a pair of chopsticks at Chinese restaurants dining with me is a guarantee. Oh wait, I forgot this is an amwf subreddit.. you're totally getting a fork.. sorry..
Fitness is extremely important to me, which means I do keep myself lean and fit by online shopping at the gym 2-4 times a week. Oh, having said that, I can be a little Boujee, but I do end up with plenty of nice clothing and I dress smart casual when I'm out. I've great hygiene and I do love my RUE 21 cologne, the only thing worth getting at that store. I absolutely love shopping and I promise I won't look like a vulture following you around the mall, unless that's what you're into. I do also have a fear of shopping at Ulta.. there's just never a man ever in the store.. but i do need my niacinamide serum from there, so you better be ready to walk me in like a boss. Also, i take care of my skin pretty well, so we're probably gonna end every date with mud masks on our faces. Beauty days are awesome!
I'm really not into short term relationships and I'm not into hookups. Like i said, fitness is very important to me, so I'd love to meet someone who is the same (skinny to lean body types). I think I can be a great conversationalist, so if you are one as one, that's an extra bonus!
Now for the tough part.. I'm 5'9".. alright, see ya later!
My friends do think that I'm attractive, but don't expect too much, I'm no model, unless you're talking about my hands. But i do have smooth, baby's butt skin all over my body. I think bring attracted to one another is pretty important too, So if you're interested at all, go ahead and send me message with a picture of yourself and I'll reciprocate, then we'll go from there 🙂

I (25F) have no skincare routine except for washing my face twice (with acnelac soap) and applying moisturizer (dermat suggested- acne oc) once a day. MY SKIN TYPE IS OILY TO COMBINATION TYPE, WITH BLACKHEADS ON NOSE ONLY
Reason - I had severe acne breakout during my puberty, used hell lot of products to control but all failed and finally underwent Isotretinoin (Acutane) treatment for it. This lead to some allergies in my body and had to discontinue the treatment midway. By then, my acnes stopped, skin was almost getting back to normal but as I stopped the medication my skin is now bumpy with uneven skin tone. I was very scared to use any more new products on my skin after this so stuck to minimal products and routine.
Now, I realise it's high time I take care of my skin with so many new products in market. But I am clueless and confused as to where to start.
I'd like to know the right products for my skin type, their order and frequency of usage as well, and should not be too expensive (for comparison- acne oc and acne uv come as affordable to me and would like to know products in these range) This post is like asking for help because I am such a dumb in this field.

and my sole subject of affection.
Anyways~ I hope that you are doing fine right now and if that's alright, may I have your attention for a second? Or well.. maybe a couple minutes?
How are you holding up? On my side, I'm taking it easy since I'm finally graduated and having some break trying not to do anything bizzare, I hope that you are doing fine right now and keep breathing ! Also if that's alright, may I have your attention for a second? I'm kidding it'll take longer than that so.. maybe a couple minutes? There is no age limit, but at least please be legal.
So, let me introduce myself as someone whom looking for an acquaintance with a genuine potential awesome individual with a pure soul and perhaps we will ended up rescuing dogs in the future together, we will never know if we never try, right? All I ask is that please be respectful towards each others and hopefully we can develop something meaningful for both of us during the process. My physical feature: 5 feet, dark brown eyes, black hair, bombshell body type, me: https://ibb.co/2S3qvHX
Personally, I am that one "care too much" kind of person who is also have a soft spot for a skincare / self-care / skin wellness thing since I am a certified beauty advisor ( but my certificate is completely useless rn ) and unfortunately I have no one to apply this skill on besides myself lately, so if you ever wanted to be a volunteer then I'll accept you with an open arms ! There is no such thing as asking too much question about this topic, I'm glad to help (: Tell me your issues and I will try my best to find the best skincare solution for you.
Furthermore, I love to categorise myself as an old school soul who still believe in the power of a monogamy idea so if you're in a relationship or you're that someone who is in an open relationship, we can only be a platonic one ( this is a final call so there is no blurry line in between ). All that I can ask from you is to be honest about yourself/ your relationship status. I'm not looking for a "getaway car" or an unfinished past kind of thing. Also not looking for an encounter with an upset gf or partner along the way.
One of my good trait is that I never forgot to say please or sorry or thank you under a certain circumstances (: my type of personality is ENTP said the Myers-Briggs and I'm putting it out there because it does matter for some people. For my bad trait is that I can have an episode of a mental breakdown due to my BPD issue, but I try to do better now. Even though,a boss girl has her weak moment sometimes I mean I am also that Passenger Princess, but as long as we can be each others hypeman/woman then I think nothing is impossible! Also probably I should really stop put my heart of my sleeve though, it burns me so many time before. Three things that you must possess : honesty, loyalty, and integrity, in other words don't be a shady or a bigotry person.
IMPORTANT : I will leave the meet up plan to you when things require us to meet in real life. So if you're not in a position to travel abroad to where I am at, then please just ignore this and let's not waste eachother's time because I'm not looking for an online fling.
Whew, so is this the end? Yes.. this is the end of this blabber but also the beginning of our amazing acquaintance, can't wait to be wined and dined by you !
I am keen to discuss about any further information and get to know you though do mind the time difference (; which is GMT + 6:7 so feel free to respond this if I'm your cup of coffee, yeah I know it's supposed to be a tea but hey whatever floats our boats, right? P.S. still looking to meet you as long as this post existing on here.

The school bell rang, and Damien left with George to the bakery down the road to buy two coconut strawberry cakes, they found Lucy there, buying a Pepsi and chicken vegetable pie, “thank you” she said, moving to leave the shop, giving Damien a deep sideways look tainted with love, “wait” he said, “what,” “we are going into the woods after this,” it was 5.33pm, he and George had left school late after staying back in the library to finish their biology homework for the week, “sure,” she said, one black pant covered leg crossed over the other above cute AF1s with ruffle socks, twirling side to side, they left with the cakes, and walked through the train station to a secret entry on the other side through a small gap in trees down into a wide drainage system protected from sight by trees and apartment buildings, running through a large, graffiti littered pipe they existed the other side and jumped over rocks in a stream to a thick patch of trees and out into the woods, Lucy found her tricycle behind a thick moss-covered log, “when are you going to learn how to ride the bike without those training wheels,” “when you die,” she swung her leg over the bike and pushed it off through the trees, Damien and George in tow, Damien on the bike he left behind the same log, Damien on foot, the other two were soon far ahead of him, “I have to go guys,” George said, “ok, see you tomorrow” Damien said, he watched George’s form fade into the darkness and shifted his attention back to Lucy, she gave him a seductive smile, and pushed onward, she was the baddest girl in their sister school, wing eye-lined green eyes, dark hair falling off her perfectly symmetrical head in curls.
The moon was now full, just below the majority of bottom branches, bright orange eyes peeking out of halloween lanterns, and green light flickering from candles through green-stained hexagonal metal-glass containers hung on branches throughout the woods, casting a green-orange hue through the woods, Lucy’s tricycle squeaked through the night, Damien behind her on his two-wheeled bike, “I like your ass” he said, observing the soft expanse of her ass going up to a thin waist beneath the short black shirt she took out of her bag, she slowed down on her bike, pulling over next to a large tree, “oh yeah” “you wanna see it” “yeah” he said, blushing, she pulled the sides of her pants down, and stepped out of them, leaving an hourglass in a short black shirt and AF1s with ruffle socks alone with him in the dark woods, she walked to him and dragging her hands down his arms, putting his hands on her waist, she moved up to kiss him, he put one hand behind her neck, pulling at a chunk of the skin on the back of her waist with the other, ecstasy beginning to flow heavily through his body, a crack of twigs sounded behind her, she gasped and looked behind, his hands still connected to her, a pair of neutral appearing solid-orange circular eyes grew through the night toward them, they shifted through space up to them, a pair of sharp white teeth streaked with dark purple-black veins slowly coming out of its black face, a sharp black hand nearly imperceptible against the night reaching out and wrapping around her head, slamming it against the tree at a nearly imperceptible speed, leaving a bloody-bony splatter on the tree, and a body from the neck down on the ground.
The demon levitated backwards, “run” it said, Damien’s eyes widened in fear, turning to run directly away, he sprinted between trees with the demon shifting through space behind him, orange eye the only hint of its existence, each shift sending a cold wave of anxiety through him, a large dilapidated, wooden house came into view ahead, hope filled his eyes, he ran up the stairs, slamming his shoulder into the door, knocking it over and stumbling through into the house, he saw a door at the back and ran toward it, seeing a hallway to the right and a kitchen to the left he threw his bag into the kitchen and began to creep through the hallway on the right, going through an open door into a bedroom, he threw himself beneath the large ruffled blanket on the bed, next to a large teddy bear, lying flat, he heard a shift of wind near the door, and felt a darkness fall over the room, animalistic breathing sounded from the demon, Damien opened his eyes and saw two orange circles come over him, horrid breath seeping through the blanket, it took all his mental effort not to move, the eyes shifted up slightly and a sharp pain stung the bottom of his chin and top of his head.
https://kdp.amazon.com/en_US/bookshelf

As research and development in the field of medical science progress, the effectiveness of treatment is increasing. Knowing the difference between various treatments is very important. It enables you to have a better discussion with a doctor. Also being fully aware of the kind of treatment you or your loved one is undergoing decreases stress and anxiety.
What is chemotherapy?
Chemotherapy is administered to kill cancer cells and shrink cancer cells so that the tumour decreases and surgery can be performed, at times it's even used to control the spread of cancer cells to prolong the life of a cancer patient as much as possible.
In chemotherapy, various drugs or medicines are given through intravenous (IV). A tube attached to a needle is inserted into a vein in the patient's chest. Some chemotherapy drugs can be taken in the form of tablets too while some drugs are injected into the muscle, under the skin or directly into the spinal fluid.
When administered correctly chemotherapy is a painless procedure. It should not cause any pain. In case it does call the doctor immediately. In rare cases, the medicine leaks into the surrounding tissues and that may cause pain.
Depending on the kind of cancer and stage, chemotherapy can take 5 mins to a few hours. You will be continuously monitored to ensure that the medication is not reacting negatively to your body.
Chemotherapy does have side effects but with the help of a good doctor, the side effects can be managed well and will not cause the patient discomfort.
Nausea, diarrhoea, mouth sores, fatigue and fever are some of the common side effects that can be treated easily. Keeping in touch with the doctor is very important. Any discomfort which is increasing should be immediately reported.
Hair loss in chemotherapy- not all patients lose hair while undergoing chemotherapy. Chemotherapy drugs kill growing cells. They can’t differentiate between normal and cancer cells. So not only cancer cells, but also those found in the hair follicles, mouth and gastrointestinal tract are killed. That is why some patients develop mouth sores, nausea, diarrhoea and lose their hair.
What is Immunotherapy?
This is a form of treatment that boost a person’s immunity to fight the cancer cells. The patient’s immune system is stimulated with the help of certain drugs, proteins and other elements. This kind of treatment is easy to produce and administer and therefore can be used extensively. Immune cells travel throughout the body via the lymphatic system. Since cancer cells do not contain the same composition that normal cells contain, immunotherapy targets mostly cancer cells.
Biomarkers are tests that determine the level of abnormality. They give a clearer picture of the patient's genetic makeup, behaviour, and interactions with the immune system. Biomarkers in Immunotherapy are easy to obtain. Biomarkers are very important in cancer treatment because they determine the course of treatment.
Also for immunotherapy liquid biopsy can be conducted so that results can be obtained easily and quickly. General biopsy for immunotherapy assesses immune cell status rather than tumour characteristics. Which again is very unique to this treatment.
IHC- Immunohistochemistry assays are used widely because they can indicate the distribution and localization of specific cellular components within cells and in proper tissue context which doctors can use to provide better treatment. Its specific standards are laid down for immunotherapy. It is also easy to predict responses in patients being administered immunotherapy.
Immunotherapies are administered into a vein (IV), through an injection, under the skin or into a muscle some are injected directly into the body cavity where the tumour is located.
This kind of therapy also causes side effects like fatigue, fever, shortness of breath, nausea or vomiting, diarrhoea, headache, decreased appetite, rash and itching.
On the whole, immunotherapy is relatively cost-friendly.
Many oncologists prefer a combination of Chemotherapy and Immunotherapy.
Several clinical trials are being conducted to increase the effectiveness and decrease the side effects of immunotherapy.
Depending on your case, symptoms, and stage of cancer Oncologist at Career Cancer Hospital, Bhopal MP decide which treatment to offer. Doctors use biochemical markers to decide the kind of treatment that is best for patients. Biochemical markers like hormones, enzymes, proteins, antigens, or antibodies produced or altered while cancer cells come together are studied carefully.
A team of specialised and dedicated doctors and staff are here to make this journey to fight cancer easy and successful. https://careerhospital.in/other-facilities
​
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What’s sweet, long, and 2.2 million Scoville Heat Units of fiery hot? That’s right baby, it’s tonight’s episode of Blitz! From last week’s Aether, we take a trip down to the pits of Hell with an absolutely searing card that’ll leave you sore from all the frenzied chanting as we hit up the famed Hodges’s Gymnasium in Raleigh, North Carolina, belonging to the mentor of our one and only Joshua Epps! With the killer main event that is in place, Death to Juniors will surely be appreciative of fighting on their own home turf, but don’t let that distract you from the 16 other fabulous talents in the running. Looking for a way to cooldown after the show? Hit up our latest stock of JOHN Bombs – the bath bombs that’ll peel all your worries off your skin! With grand matches and sizzling returns ahead of us, let’s dive right into the lava pool!
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Non-Title: FBE World Heavyweight Champion Inferno vs Sebastian King
The issues between the FBE World Heavyweight Champion and the youth have been a hot topic in recent months, bleeding into the headlines with his initial attack on current PROVINCE Leader T.M Imran. Whilst they’ve had two intensely personal matches since, a lot of bad blood still exists between the two sides, and tonight will be looking to take a deeper look at that when Inferno continues his crusade against the Trial Era as he takes on the Duke of Destruction, Sebastian King!
One of the figureheads of this new generation with his Cinderella run alongside Corey Youngblood as Tequila Inc. through last year’s Punish & Crush Tournament, the partnership producing a masterful duology against the reigning Tag Team Champions, and a promising continued rise up the ranks alongside his new stablemates, he’s everything people want to be, and equally everything Baba Blitz wants to hate. One of the better all-rounders this company has seen, Sebastian’s got the tools to go from cooking foetuses inside a Steel Cage to grappling it out on the mat, so when making a welcome return to these holy lands, you best believe he won’t be leaving until Inferno’s door is kicked off its hinges!
Prompt: Rebook ECW Barely Legal (Max 1000 Words)
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B Block: Joey Joey Siwa [0] vs Nate Matthews [0]
Despite a fantastic performance in his first tournament match two weeks ago, Joey Joey Siwa fell narrowly short of his first 2 points, and yet, it’s a defeat that should have his blockmates more concerned for their own safety. Already revealing once what he looks like when reaching his darkest depths, a JJS starved of success is not a JJS one wants to deal with, a pizza cutter primed to slice through anyone that defies him. With the Nebraskan now officially let loose in the wild, there is perhaps but one man who may boast the experience of putting down the world’s deadliest, and that’s his next B Block opponent, Nate Matthews!
Emerging from the plains of Tijuana, the Living Legend’s a product of one of the most dangerous cities in the world, and if his body of work over the last 4 years is anything to go by, he won’t hesitate to gut those standing in his way and bleed them dry. Rounding out the group of guys yet to make their Shining Light League debuts, Nate surely has his eyes on yet another championship and tournament win, but if Siwa has anything to say about it, it's going to be a bumpy ride to the top!
Prompt: Book Dragon Lee's NXT run (Max 1000 Words)
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Mark Steel vs Ferdinand Maxim
Fresh off a career highlight win last week, Mark Steel continues to stun the world with his ability to pull one off in a pinch, proving exactly why you should never count anyone out when Pure Rules are in effect. Blitz taking place around parts he’s rather familiar with himself, the Death to Juniors member has made a special request to wrestle on home territory to stay hot ahead of his final two block matches, so leave it up to none other than a returning Ferdinand Maxim to answer that challenge! A somewhat precursor of sorts to Steel with his time as part of the famed Collective, the Wild Wester is exactly the type of fella that Mark’s agenda wants a piece of, his Junior Heavyweight stylings meaning the guillotine is primed and ready. With a much lengthier tenure to his name though, experience lies in Le Prince de Paris’s corner, so expect nothing short of an interesting battle between two proud representatives of contrasting generations!
Prompt: Book FTR's WWE return if they lose to The Gunns (Max 1000 Words)
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D Block: Erick Koeman [0] vs Kentaro Sakamoto [0]
Even after just one night of it, D Block’s been nothing short of wildly competitive, in part owed to the level of talent brimming from all 5 of its components. It’s also been a prime location for faction warfare, everyone repping a different allegiance in the fight, adamant to bring home the trophy to their group. When it comes to Erick Koeman and Kentaro Sakamoto, one of each shimmering example from PROVINCE and PROSPECT respectively are tossed into the middle for a battle of supremacy between the leading ‘P’ factions of recent times, a truckload of pride riding on this one. El Cráneo has a lot on his plate at the moment, having to balance the Punish & Crush Tournament with the Shining Light League, which could potentially leave him stretched just thin enough for the Flying Dutchman to blow him out the water, though leave it to a hitman to fire two bullets at once, tonight about to prove whether his aim is as true as is to be believed!
Prompt: Rebook Jay White in IMPACT (Max 1000 Words)
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B Block: Hunter Maguire [2] vs FBE World Tag Team Champion Capital STEEZ [2]
Perhaps the most important match of the tournament thus far is the one up next as for the first time, two competitors with wins under their belt collide, making this a battle for the top of B Block! No shortage of history between Death to Juniors and Capital STEEZ, their animosities dating back to the Anniversary Show when King Capital teamed with surprising ally “Godfather of Pure Rules” Atlas Rogue against Hunter Maguire and Joshua Epps in winning effort, those issues were only punctuated last week as DTJ’s Misery stunned the FBE World Tag Team Champion in an upset, bringing his 2023 record against the group to 1-1. Fighting in their very home grounds here, there’s no better place for STEEZ to deliver a chilly helping of revenge, but when made to be a relative fish out of water, the burning question on everyone’s minds is whether Maguire knows something about this place that STEEZ doesn’t, Hunter’s cunning a massive asset to him here as traps lay abound!
Prompt: Rebook Edge and Christian's 2001 Rivalry (Max 1000 Words)
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ICON vs Happy
When the Pure Division was initially launched almost a year ago, one man that came calling back to participate was the Aviator himself, ICON, managing to net a shot at the throne in his short time here. One of the more accomplished to set foot in FBE, picking up the Television, World Tag Team, and Junior Heavyweight Championships in rapid succession back in the day, he’s fought for every active championship and each time given every champion a match they’ll never forget. But for a competitor like him, that’s not enough. Making his full-time return to Blitz action tonight, he’s got the Pure Championship on his mind, and he’ll stop at nothing to make it his!
But what lies ahead is perhaps the toughest possible first match back as standing in his way is a competitor that’s proven his efficacy under this ruleset many a time – Happy! A true Trial Era pillar, the Clown was the first of his batch to win the World Heavyweight Championship, that too as his first title in the company, which hasn’t been done since the first champion was crowned in FBE. Competing at an unmatched level throughout 2022, even main eventing BTE, he’s the perfect candidate to test what ICON still has in the tank after a lengthy hiatus whilst proving 2022 was just the beginning of what we’ll see from the monster that resides under your bed!
Prompt: Book the RAW after WrestleMania 39 (Max 1000 Words)
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D Block: Joshua Epps [2] vs FBE Junior Heavyweight Champion Misery [0]
One of the more exciting times in the year is when two factions go head-to-head with all their manpower to quell the debate of which one is undisputedly better. What’s arguably even more thrilling though are the rarer instances in which two members of the same fight are forced to put their friendship aside in their respective quests for championships. For Death to Juniors, that’s no unfamiliar situation, last year’s Gedo Classic Finals seeing Misery and Hunter Maguire come to blows over the vacant FBE Junior Heavyweight Championship in one of the division’s standout matches that year. By that merit, what’s to come between Joshua Epps and Misery right here can only be anticipated as something very, very special.
Both on unquestionably killer (pun intended) runs, God’s Greatest Athlete recording a recent brilliant Television Championship reign and continually being a standout fixture here on Blitz as seen with his fantastic performance in last week’s main event, and Misery mere days away from the breaking the title reign length record with her Junior Title, ruling over the division with an iron fist whilst proving herself just as competent under Pure Rules given her godly win in last week’s opener, there’s no doubt that something special is to go down here between the two. And fighting in front of Pop Hodges himself, expect no punches to be pulled between great allies but perhaps even better foes as both look to impress the legend in what’s surely to be an exhilarating showdown between DTJ’s leading members!
Prompt: Book Josh Alexander's return from injury (Max 1000 Words)
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Bookings are due on April 3rd at 11PM EST, so don’t forget to submit timely and/or report any issues with prompts and deadlines before then. But until then, keep up the fantastic work lads. Pure rules.

i'm using CBBE 3BA and HIMBO, and i've downloaded theses body-presets: https://www.nexusmods.com/skyrimspecialedition/mods/13896 https://www.nexusmods.com/skyrimspecialedition/mods/57880
i'm also using "BnP" both male and female-skins, but they shouldn't be the issue considering they're just, well texture-skins, not bodies.
Installed Obody, followed the guide to the letter. Then in-game it seem like the body-presets i've downloaded dosn't appear. whenever i press O on a character, the preset list is empty. As if the mod can't tell there's presets at all.
Couldn't resolve the problem. so i switched to Auto-Body, Followed the guide to the letter, tried to give a unique body to Carlotta Valentia to see if it was working. Same problem, it seem like the preset i've chosen dosn't appear.
-i turned off Bodygen in Skee64 (a file from Racemenu). -made sure i downloaded only presets compatibles for 3BA. -downloaded and installed them with my mod-manager, even tried to directly install them in /data. what am i missing here?

I get laughed at and called stupid for this a lot but maybe this sub will get it due to the theme. I hate dress codes. I hate rules about how I look. I have a tiny tiny face tattoo and dyed hair. This makes me ineligible immediately at most places. I want to wear sweatpants in a job that requires me to lift, climb, reach, squat, get my clothes stained, get soaked in water, etc. If it’s an active job let me wear activewear. Sure it’s my fault for getting tattooed up at 18 but really? Im worthless for some character customization? Sorry I didn’t save my virgin skin for an employer. At this point it’s basically “oh you have full availability and are overqualified for this entry level position? shame about that little tattoo we really needed someone :(“. Or asking me to dye my hair differently as if I haven’t been dying it the same color for 10 years. I must change and alter my physical body in permanent or semi permanent ways for 15 an hour. I like how I look and I barely have any freedom as it is. Why can’t I at least have a minimal amount of bodily autonomy if Im going to work a slave wage. And before it’s brought up no, never been arrested and don’t do drugs. If that’s what they cared about a drug test/background check should put me in the clear.

“The lover carves into his soul the model of the beloved. In that way, the soul of the lover becomes the mirror in which the image of the loved one is reflected.” - Marsilio Ficino, Commentary on Plato's Symposium
Nietzsche’s criticisms of Hegel are often conflated with Schopenhauer’s. Often by people who type things like, “I’m in the Schopenhauer camp when it comes to Hegel and his ilk.” In a series of Beeps-and-Boops they copy-and-paste Schopenhauer’s loathing without any of Schopenhauer’s substance (which would require actually engaging with Schopenhauer and Hegel) instead these Thinkers exists as little framed photos on a candle covered shrine in Geocities. Even if they’re correct they’re still wrong and worthy of immediate scorn and derision. We must express the most profound sense of Christian Pity and Charity at the sight of their nakedness.
It’s easy to spiral on this particular subject but unbecoming, revealing, even damning. What they don’t seem to process, is that the seethe and the scolding and the tantrums are in their manner the highest form of compliment either philosopher could muster. That the younger Schopenhauer’s response to Hegel’s semantic blunder should be a kind of ecstatic fury that propelled his career as a philosopher. That Schopenhauer is endearing when he puts pen to paper and writes:
“May Hegel's philosophy of absolute nonsense - three-fourths cash and one-fourth crazy fancies - continue to pass for unfathomable wisdom without anyone suggesting as an appropriate motto for his writings Shakespeare's words: "Such stuff as madmen tongue and brain not," or, as an emblematical vignette, the cuttle-fish with its ink-bag, creating a cloud of darkness around it to prevent people from seeing what it is, with the device: mea caligine tutus. - May each day bring us, as hitherto, new systems adapted for University purposes, entirely made up of words and phrases and in a learned jargon besides, which allows people to talk whole days without saying anything; and may these delights never be disturbed by the Arabian proverb: "I hear the clappering of the mill, but I see no flour." - For all this is in accordance with the age and must have its course.”
Tempestuous little man. Without Hegel’s error what would’ve become of Schopenhauer? Would he have attempted to actively compete against Hegel? Hegel as the Phantom of Eric Roberts in the Killers Miss Atomic Bomb music video? The Other-Ghost, Hegel’s Smirking Geist cucking Schopenhauer, Sophia in his arms, Schopenhauer casts the wedding ring to the ground and runs away. As was the case in respect to Kierkegaard. Cucked out of marriage by the Ghost & Machine. “And it’s all in my head, but she’s touching his chest now, he takes off her dress now, LET ME GO. And I just can’t look it’s killing me. And taking control.”
An error is a wound is a mercy.
Nietzsche is different. Unlike Schopenhauer he doesn’t pretend to create a superior metaphysical system (the Platonic Carnivalesque) to rival Hegel’s.
I think the spirit of a Nietzschean critique of Hegel is best exemplified by aphorism 317 in Daybreak,
“The judgment of the evening. - He who reflects on the work he has done during the day and during his life, but does so when he has finished it and is tired, usually arrives at a melancholy conclusion: this however is not the fault of his day or his life, but of his tiredness. - In the midst of our work we usually have no leisure to pass judgment on life and existence, nor in the midst of our pleasures: but if we should happen to do so, we should no longer agree with him who waited for the seventh day and its repose before he decided that everything was very beautiful - he had let the better moment go by.”
Hegel as a Christian Nihilist and the Dialectic as Slave Morality. All finite forms of life attain their truth in the process of self-overcoming. Hegel uses Negativity to pacify an excess of Negativity. Hegel’s System annuls the Abyss. The Truth of any given determination is realized in its exhaustion. This Truth is what Remains. As part of a Whole. Eternal. Defeat for Hegel is what brings us to our Truth. That the subject’s defeat should purify it of its particularities and its impositions. My thoughts are already part of reality. This Knowledge leads to renunciation. I’m no longer attempting to impose or enforce myself on reality, to shape it in the heat of my perverse gaze. I look up at the stars and recognize a series of sores oozing out a brilliant light. In the Beggar’s Eye I see Christ. Saint Lazarus draped in indigo rags surrounded by dogs. In the Eyes of the King of the World, Christ. In the Illness the Cure. In the Poison the Medicine.
Hegel stands next to his student, the student looks up at the starry sky in awe. “They are the abode of the blessed.” Hegel grumbles, “The stars, hum! Hum! The stars are only a gleaming leprosy in the sky.’” Like Lorde, he never watches the stars because there’s so much down here. As he puts it in one lecture,
“The human being is this Night, this empty nothing which contains everything in its simplicity - a wealth of infinitely many representations, images, none of which occur to it directly, and none of which are not present. This [is] the Night; the interior of [human] nature, existing here - pure Self - [and] in phantasmagoric representations it is night everywhere: here a bloody head suddenly shoots up and there another white shape, only to disappear as suddenly. We see this Night when we look a human being in the eye, looking into a Night which turns, terrifying. [For from his eyes] the night of the world hangs out towards us.”
Let us then briefly think with Hegel whose underling problem is, from the very beginning of his thought, that of love.
What is Blue?
According to Goethe in his Theory of Colors,
“As yellow is always accompanied with light, so it may be said that blue still brings a principle of darkness with it.
This color has a peculiar and almost indescribable effect on the eye. As a hue it is powerful — but it is on the negative side, and in its highest purity is, as it were, a stimulating negation. Its appearance, then, is a kind of contradiction between excitement and repose.
As the upper sky and distant mountains appear blue, so a blue surface seems to retire from us.
But as we readily follow an agreeable object that flies from us, so we love to contemplate blue — not because it advances to us, but because it draws us after it.
Blue gives us an impression of cold, and thus, again, reminds us of shade. We have before spoken of its affinity with black.
Rooms which are hung with pure blue, appear in some degree larger, but at the same time empty and cold.
The appearance of objects seen through a blue glass is gloomy and melancholy.”
Goethe and a defense of Goethe’s critique of Newton’s Opticks unites Hegel and Schopenhauer. That color is produced by light and by what stands against it. Goethe who said that were the eye not of the sun how could we behold the light. Brilliant in the poetic continuity this expresses. A golden chain from Empedocles to Plato and Aristotle to the Stoics and so on. Summarized here elegantly by the physicist Arthur Zajonc, “the interior light coalesces with daylight, like to like, forming thereby a single homogenous body of light. That body, a marriage of inner light and outer, forges a link between the objects of the world and the soul. It becomes the bridge along which the subtle motions of an exterior object may pass, causing the sensation of sight.” Aristotle proposed the existence of a Proton Organon or Primary Instrument, an organ of congealed pneuma, located in the heart, that reconciles the division between the sensible and the intelligible. The Stoics would go on the rename this Mercurial (both volatile-subtle and fixed) Instrument, the Hegemonikon, the synthesizer or icon-maker. Whose function is to produce phantasms. The instrument through which the soul transmits all vital activities to the body and also the body’s way of capturing the sensations from the five senses and translating them into phantasms or images that could be understood by the soul.
The Lover longing loving unrequited. Smiling like she means it. Being-thrown into this World. Never fully at home, refracted, out of joint. That this affliction is our common inheritance. I think this is our patrimony. We are the heirs of this Abyss. It is to some degree I think fundamentally "Western" fundamentally "Romantic". Regardless of political opinion or alignment. It speaks to us. Through us. Perhaps it's because the Republic of Letters is largely comprised of Melancholic Perverts. Nostalgia or homesickness, as a longing for a reality which can only be possessed through the imagination and through the dream, the genuine site of anamnesis or recollection in the unreal. Evoking for us the movement of the soul described by the Venetian Magician-Philosopher Guilio Camillo; descending through the Lunar Gate of Cancer (of man), drinking from the cup of Bacchus and, depending on how much one imbibes, forgetting about all the things ‘up there’ before making our way back through the Saturnine Gate of Capricorn (of the gods). Tightrope walking to Luna. I see her so very clearly. My Corporeal Dasha, Giordano Bruno would rebuke me harshly, that I should Simp as I do for "these eyes, these ears, this blush, this tongue, this tooth, this hair, this dress, this coat, this little shoe .. . , this sun in eclipse, this crazy person, this slut, this stench, this deathbed, this privy, this mensturation, this corpse... which, by means of a superficial appearance, a shadow, a phantasm, a dream, a Circe-like charm in the service of procreation, deceives us by taking the form of beauty." Fuck it. Yet there is an Image behind the Image, a Woman behind my woman. The Platonic Dasha. Daria the Luminous Homunculi. Madonna Intelligenza who has served as a guide throughout this journey. “Keep your eyes on me.” I wobble on the tightrope, your eyes are what kept me, you and your rose-wreathed heart lit. A Unity-of-Opposites. Georges Bataille writes in The Sorcerer's Apprentice, “The image through which, in an instant, destiny has become alive thus finds itself projected into a world foreign to everyday agitation. The woman toward whom a man is draw, as to his human destiny, no longer belongs to the space that money controls. Her sweetness escapes the real world, through which she moves without allowing herself to be any more imprisoned than a dream. Misfortune would ravage the spirit anyone who lets himself be possessed by the need to reduce her.”
On Love Hegel writes, “Since love is a sensing of something living, lovers can be distinct only in so far as they are mortal and do not look upon this possibility of separation as if there were really a separation or as if reality were a sort of conjunction between possibility and existence. In the lovers there is no matter; they are a living whole.” That the Unity of Love is informed precisely by the division or difference between the Lover and the Beloved. The Union of Love, “…can remain so only as long as the separate lovers are opposed solely in the sense that the one loves and the other is loved, i.e., that each separate lover is one organ in a living whole.”
Here we might ponder Hegel’s Philosophy as a Philosophy of Death. The vespers-born melancholy conclusion is perhaps being that all Love is Unrequited. As Marsilio Ficino notes in his Commentary on Plato’s Symposium, “Insofar as it is death, it is bitter, and insofar it is voluntary, it is sweet. He who loves dies; for his consciousness, oblivious of himself, is devoted exclusively to the loved one, and a man who is not conscious of himself is certainly not conscious in himself. Therefore, a soul that is so affected, does not function in itself, because the primary function of the soul is consciousness…. Therefore, the unrequited lover lives nowhere; he is completely dead.”
Blue the color of Sulfur ignited. Blue the color of the Ocean of the Dead, of Dasein. The blue knees of a prayerful lover and the blue lips of the lovelorn fool, “Here’s to my love - O true apothecary! Thy drugs are quick. - Thus with a kiss I die.” That the smell of bitter almonds should remind the good doctor of unrequited love.
Such a melancholy conclusion can only be produced by a proper melancholic. Melancholy was regarded by Ficino as one of seven exemptions in which the bond between body and soul was weakened, allowing the soul to take flight and acquire the gifts of premonition and clairvoyance. Saint Albertus Magnus writes of the two kinds of melancholy. Hot melancholy and its two primary effects on the subject’s phantasmic activity he describes thusly,
“The first consists in the mobility of the phantasms within the subtle organism: the second, in the great capacity of phantasms to stay impressed upon the pneuma. This brings with it, besides a prodigious memory, an extraordinary capacity for analysis. This is why, Ficino tells us, 'all the great man who have ever excelled in an art have been melancholic. Either because they were born so or become so through assiduous meditation.”
Philosophy begins with this Unhappy Consciousness. The Alienated Soul lithe and loveless, which is the consciousness of self as a divided nature, a doubled and merely contradictory being. Dissatisfied with its Self and the World it retreats inward, like a Nymph fleeing Pan, fleeing into Reflection, which might likewise take the form of a fleeing into Nature (think Thoreau’s Walden). Herein is the mirk. This Narcissistic dialectic between Subject and Phantasmata. The Ouroboric Narcissism of the Beautiful Soul.
Another affliction associated with Melancholy is Hysteria. The Psychoanalyst Jacques Lacan refers to Hegel as the most Sublime Hysteric. The Hysteric asks questions because they experience their own desire as if it were the desire of the Other.
The Spirit retreats into a pre-rational state of life, a Life of Feeling, that this feeling expresses a movement in which the soul is no longer simply natural, but able to realize a mastery over itself.
“Finally, in the “feeling of self,” the individual becomes “a sensitive totality.” But the gradual formation of the ‘I’ is paradoxically accompanied by a loss of fluidity, leading to “ruin and disaster within the conscious spirit.” This crisis results from the fact that the subject, being constituted in a free relation to the self, feels at the same time like ‘another’, and this tension pushes it into a state of ‘trembling’ (durchzittern).” The Future of Hegel, Plasticity, Temporality, Dialectics, Catherine Malabou.
How does Hegel escape? Or perhaps more accurately how can we escape this trap? This Pneumatic Mirror-World. Of Subject-Mirror-Phantasmata. The Romantic Prison? Of one who learns of Love in order to be Loveless? Hold that thought.
Returning to the color blue, the psychologist James Hillman writes in Alchemical Psychology,
“This is the realm of the alchemical (kyanos, blue; kynos, dog); blue takes on a dog-like quality: hangdog and dirty dog, both. Why does depression seek porn? For arousal? For Eros and Priapos and Venus to come to life? Rather, I think, to maintain the depression, to re-direct the verticality of desire downward and backward (doggy fashion), clipping the wings of eros. Pornography - an opus contra naturam, a counter-instinct of the psyche, perverting the conventionally natural, enslaving, torturing; an erotics of despair.
To translate these esoteric references into the blue dog’s perverse obsessions we discover this: Invisible Hades appears in the world as Dionysus. There is a divine (i.e., invisible, unfathomable) impulse that seeks to enter ordinary life. It wants to know the soul in the Biblical sense. Carnal knowledge, intimate knowledge, knowledge of intimates. (Hence the innumerable images of copulation throughout alchemy.) The soul longs for this copulation, and sings its longing in the blues, blueing its own flesh, drawing the divine down into the ordinary body. (Hence the blues’ libidinous mood.)”
My Cup Overfloweth.
Pure thinking-subjectivity is phantasmological or hauntological. The role of the Phantasmata in the context of medieval philosophy, is described exquisitely by Mauricio Loza in The Hounds of Actaeon. The Phantasm or Phantom is understood “as a mental image with effects reaching not only the level of perception but that of social construction, the phantasm exists in the twilight between the objective and the subjectivity, the material and the immaterial, a zone of indistinction between reality and unreality. This is why the phantasm pulls us towards the twilight from whence it comes: Its central action is to drag us into the shadow of the world.”
Minerva’s Owls unfurls its wings only with the falling of dusk.
For the great Persian scholar Avicenna, sensory phantasms were processed through five virtues or powers corresponding to five cavities in the cranium; phantasy or common sense, imagination, cogitative virtue, the estimative virtue, and finally the reminiscent virtue. According to Georgio Agamben in his work Stanzas: Word and Phantasm in Western Culture, Avicenna conceives of this gradation through the inner senses as a "progressive 'disrobing' (denudatio) of the phantasm from its material accidents."
Material accidents in this instance, evoking the etymological origins and proliferation into common speech of the word "accident" itself.
Ad - 'towards to' and cadere - 'to fall'. The Latin Accident - 'happening' used in late Middle English to refer to 'an Event'. Used to refer to the parts of the sacred bread and wine that remained after the transubstantiation through the sacrament of The Holy Eucharist,
“Thus, throughout the history of Scholasticism we have to do with a sort of triangle of intellectual forces: Realism and Nominalism fighting a five hundred years’ war, and the Church, in its official capacity, anxiously endeavouring to hold the balance between them. One wonders whether the three parties to this ancient dispute may not have found symbolic expression in Tweedledum, Tweedledee, and the ‘Monstrous Crow’ of nursery legend. But it is no disparagement of the intellects of that day to say that to us the chief interest of their polemics lies in the many new and accurate instruments of thought with which they provided us. The common word accident is an excellent example. We use it every day without realizing that it was only imported from Latin by the indefatigable efforts of the Schoolmen to reconcile the doctrine of Realism with the Catholic dogma of Transubstantiation. The accidents, when they first came into the English language, meant that part of the sacred bread and wine which remained after the substance had been transmuted into the body and blood of Christ.” History in English Words, Owen Barfield
Here we see a process of Pneuma returning to Pneuma through this process of Rising and Falling. That the Absolute Idea is a Radiant Star. That the Phantasm undergoes a kind of purification process, from the sensible to the spiritual to the mnemonic. That this purification entails a kind of excremental remainder. A material accident. An excess which goes?
This brings to mind the question that the Sophist Parmenides (in Plato's Parmenides) raises to Socrates, which forces Socrates to admit to his own limitations. It utterly stumps the Apostate Tragedian. That being whether or not there is an eidos or Pure Idea of the lowest material things. Things like excrement and dust and I might add these eyes, these ears, this blush, this tongue, this tooth, this hair, this dress, this coat, this little shoe .. . , this sun in eclipse, this crazy person, this slut, this stench, this deathbed, this privy, this mensturation, this corpse...
The Ghost and The Star
Recall the episode with Hegel comparing stars to leprosy sores. This got out around town and Hegel found himself having to address this controversy,
"It has been rumoured round the town that I have compared the stars to a rash on an organism where the skin erupts in an countless mass of red spots: or to an ant-heap in which too, there is Understanding and necessity. In fact, I do rate what is concrete higher than what is abstract, and an animality that develops into no more than a slime, higher than the starry host."
The rock is a rock.
Hegel defines the Domain of Art as the “sensible appearing of the idea”… or the Idea given expression in Sensuous Form. This is to be understood as The Star shining through The Ghost. This opposition between Form and Content. This Contradiction is what animates the Motion of Spirit. From Art towards Philosophy.
She is and is not. Ah wait. I'm not her. But in this regard I am the same and suddenly the Ghost is Concretized.
Alexandre Kojève in his Lectures on the Phenomenology of Spirit writes,
"It is known that Hegel asserted that his knowledge is circular, and that circularity is the necessary and sufficient condition of absolute truth - that is, of complete, universal, and definitive (or "eternal") truth."
The Hysterics quandary finds some resolution. The question of the Other is reflexively transformed into the answer to the question.
"In the Wise Man's absolute Knowledge, each question is its own answer, but is so only because he goes through the totality of questions-answers that forms the entirety of the System. Likewise, in his existence, the Wise Man remains in identity with himself, he is closed up in himself; but he remains in identity with himself because he passes through the totality of others, and is closed up in himself. Which (according to the Phenomenology) means, quite simply, that the only man who can be Wise is a Citizen of the universal and homogeneous State - that is to say, the State of the Tun Aller und Jeder, in which each man exists only through and for the whole, and the whole exists through and for each man."
We return to Self-Consciousness. We're not the same. We're different. Tonight.
Eros pins Pan. Chronos clips Eros’ wings. Compulsion is overcome by Love. Love is overcome by Time. Love can only be actualized and concretized through Time. When it must Dwell in a given Space. This is the Poetic-Plasticity. This is the Commitment.
“Desire has reserved to itself the pure negating of the object and thereby unalloyed feeling of self. This satisfaction, however, just for that reason is itself only a state of evanescence, for it lacks objectivity or subsistence. Labour, on the other hand, is desire restrained and checked, evanescence delayed and postponed; in other words, labour shapes and fashions the thing.” (Phenomenology of Spirit)
We begin with the Problem of Love and in the Problem find the Solution. Love is the Answer to the Question of Love. Loving is to give what one does not have.
Our Unrequited Love is Mutual,
“In fact, there is only one death in mutual love, but there are two resurrections, for a lover dies within himself the moment he forgets about himself, but he returns to life immediately in his loved one as soon as the loved ones embraces him in loving contemplation. He is resurrected once more when he finally recognizes himself in his beloved and no longer doubts that he is loved. O, happy death, which is followed by two loves. O, wondrous exchange in which each gives himself up for the other, and has the other, yet does not cease to have himself.” Commentary on Plato's Symposium, Marsilio Ficino.
To be Overcome is to Animate. This is the Labor of Love. Productive Labor as Art.
You understand why Hegel is so very frustrating? In his System. In the Movement from East to West back East. We find the Heiros Gamos, the Sacred Matrimony of Eros and Sophia, and in this Unity of Opposites the philosopher becomes the Sage. In the production of this Heiros Gamos, Hegel's System becomes the Perfect Pneumatic Circle.
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I make of Nietzsche a traveling companion through Hegel’s Aesthetics. Why? Because The Birth of Tragedy is crudely Hegelian. Here we find ourselves encountering what is so very frustrating about Hegel and his Pneumatic Circle, his method and his system. From the occultists perspective this is because Hegel’s System is an Artifice of Sacral or Mythic Time, of Cyclical Time. The genuinely infuriating thing is realizing that the Artifice, the “Copy” is in fact the original. This is why some speak of the feminizing effect of Hegel. Feminizing in the way Achilles’ is feminized by Scamander. That not only do we never step in the same river twice and that the river is the site of the Doom-driven Hero’s self-fulfilling prophesy.
As Nietzsche himself puts it, “one cannot refute an eye disease.” I thought it would be stimulating to read The Birth of Tragedy through the lens of Hegel’s Lectures on Aesthetics. Framing Nietzsche and his insights within a Hegelian Tableaux. Nietzsche who denounces Metaphysical Systematization. Demurely objecting he says, “unhand me woman,” with a little blush. Does he mean it? I don’t think it was Hegel’s Dialectical Method or Logic that Nietzsche objected too. Denouncing instead the refraction between the Philosopher and the Logic (an ironic detachment)… that the Philosopher and his Logic are not two separate beings. That for him the Philosopher is Alkahest or Universal Solvent. Body and Soul collapse into a singularity, Art and Artists. No, in a sense Nietzsche celebrates the animating antagonism at the Heart of Hegel’s work. That this refraction is what results in the System which Nietzsche saw as modeling contemporary German Bourgeois fearfulness and timidity simply solidifies into Consensus. “I’m old and I don’t want to be alone.” That the System should be a kind of Metaphysical Prison concretized around the Fiery Pneuma, the brilliance of Hegel’s Esprit.
The application of the Dialectical Method is evidenced throughout The Birth of Tragedy; The Apollonian thesis, the Dionysian antithesis, the Tragic synthesis. Or perhaps in a manner more accurate to Hegel; The Dionysian Abstract, the Apollonian Negation, the Tragic Negation-of-Negation, and the Socratic Concretization.
The section dedicated to a retrospective appraisal of The Birth of Tragedy in Ecce Homo, Nietzsche concludes that all the good things he had ever written about Richard Wagner were actually about him. He was talking about himself the whole time without even realizing it, “"Even psychologically all decisive traits of my own nature are projected into Wagner’s - the close proximity of the brightest and the most calamitous forces, the will to power as no man ever possessed it, the ruthless courage in matters of the spirit, the unlimited power to learn without damage to the will to act.” Poor Nietzsche he who was too high-strung for his own good. Comes to a conclusion paralleling Hegel as it concerns Art, specifically Music. Perhaps one day, there will be Dionysian future for music. But for now, the Pneuma roils through space-and-time, and it culminates in Nietzsche or Zarathustra, as the Last Philosopher or the first Tragic Philosopher. Who despite all the aristocratic pretensions cannot help but write in a popular and accessible manner. Writing into motion the conditions for the Dionysian resurgence he had once thought was being spearheaded by the compositions of Richard Wagner.
He goes so far as to be both Beethoven and Goethe’s response to Beethoven in the anticipation of his works and in the need for them to remain ‘exclusive’ despite their undeniably popular character. Goethe in his old age weeping softly to Beethoven’s sonatas, proclaims “If such music were performed by a large orchestra, it would destroy everything around it.”
The stylish and inspirited Vitalism of Nietzsche’s ruminations is Pneumatic. A red dot in the center of a dark blue sphere.
Dialectics reveals an Infinite Spiral. The Circle divided by a straight-line. Containing the spiral. The straight-line breaks through the circle. Above and Below. Revealing three other spheres. Above the configuration one spiral. Beneath it two spirals; one winding up and the other winding down. On a Hegelian theological note. God the Father and God the Holy Spirit proceed from God the Son. “In the beginning was the Word, and the Word was with God, and the Word was God.” John 1:1.
Here we might locate the Traumatic Temporality of Christianity. The introduction of History. Time as Chronos. With God the Son. Without the historical personage of Jesus Christ, there wouldn’t be a Trinitarian Unity and Division. From God the Son proceeds God the Father and God the Holy Spirit. In this wound we are brought to an awareness of another Time. A Timeless-Time or a Time sans History. “In the Beginning was the Word, and the Word was with God, and the Word was God,” a time in which God the Father, God the Son, God the Holy Spirit had always been. The Triune God. Whether or not, in this Aionic Time, God the Holy Spirit proceeds from God the Father or from God the Father and God the Son, is the division between East and West.
This Times overlap and nowhere is this more evident than in the anachronisms or perhaps more accurately, the Archeo-modernity, of the romantic painting. Or perhaps further still, in the Ethiopian depiction of Christ, in the Korean depiction of Christ, and in the Italian depiction of Christ. Black Jesus, Asian Jesus, and European Jesus.
As that obscure note by Nietzsche produced by Gilles Deleuze in his work Nietzsche and Philosophy goes, “Universal chaos which excluded all purposeful activity does not contradict the idea of the cycle; for this idea is only an irrational necessity.” Here we see Nietzsche approaching something akin to the Infinite Dialectic realized and developed in Mao Zedong’s contributions to Dialectical and Historical Materialism. As Mao writes in On Contradiction, “The universality or absoluteness of contradiction has a twofold meaning. One is that contradiction exists in the process of development of all things, and the other is that in the process of development of each thing a movement of opposites exists from beginning to end.”
The stylish and inspirited Vitalism of Nietzsche’s ruminations is Pneumatic. Being Pneumatic it is Phantasmic. Here we locate the Girardian critique of Nietzsche. As Nietzsche proclaims in Ecce Homo that everything his was praising Wagner for is in fact praise he was unconsciously directing at himself, at his values or innate dignities, the obverse is true. For Nietzsche every great philosophical work is a confessional, an involuntary and unconscious autobiography. He invents the Overman and by extension the Last Man. Will to Power and Ressentiment. One cannot exist without the other and in Nietzsche they collapse into a singularity (a point worth keeping in mind when we eventually venture into Deleuze and his Anti-Hegelianism). The Last Philosopher. In sum Girard’s contention is that in the production of these Phantasmata, Nietzsche ends up offering to his audience another Scapegoat. The Man of Ressentiment and the Slave Morality. Obviously within Nietzsche the potential for this is treated triumphantly. Nietzsche refuses to have his Poetic Revelry stifled by timorous considerations. That stupid people might read his works and take it as an excuse to persecute Christians or to locate the Man of Ressentiment in their political adversaries. That they might completely forget the contradictions inherent to the very office of “Tragic Philosopher” and how the Vagabond and the Prophet are a singular figure, hybrid and lovelorn and glorious. “If I had power I’d know how to immediately and brutally exercise it.” None of this concerns Nietzsche. People will misinterpret you regardless. Still the points are well worth reflecting on and prove stimulating as we move from the Symbolic-Classical to the Classical-Romantic.

When you need to cool off, your blood vessels open up, letting blood flow to your arms and legs so heat can escape through your skin.
Context: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SGHRz8wpj3E
Whether you’re planning your next vacation, or you just want to know how many layers you’ll need to put on in the morning, you probably check the weather forecast pretty often. But you should know, before you go out with that extra jacket, that the temperature might not be the best measure of what it actually feels like outside. Humidity is important, too, which is why you might sometimes think the forecasters must have been wrong, because it’s definitely about ten degrees hotter right now and you’re covered in sweaty grossness. Your body’s built-in thermostat likes to keep your internal temperature at a steady 37 degrees Celsius so that all of your enzymes can do what they’re supposed to do... you know … keeping you alive. That's the temperature they like. When you need to cool off, your blood vessels open up, letting blood flow to your arms and legs so heat can escape through your skin. Your sweat glands also start to produce moisture, which takes a bunch of heat with it when it evaporates.

The school bell rang, and Damien left with George to the bakery down the road to buy two coconut strawberry cakes, they found Lucy there, buying a Pepsi and chicken vegetable pie, “thank you” she said, moving to leave the shop, giving Damien a deep sideways look tainted with love, “wait” he said, “what,” “we are going into the woods after this,” it was 5.33pm, he and George had left school late after staying back in the library to finish their biology homework for the week, “sure,” she said, one black pant covered leg crossed over the other above cute AF1s with ruffle socks, twirling side to side, they left with the cakes, and walked through the train station to a secret entry on the other side through a small gap in trees down into a wide drainage system protected from sight by trees and apartment buildings, running through a large, graffiti littered pipe they existed the other side and jumped over rocks in a stream to a thick patch of trees and out into the woods, Lucy found her tricycle behind a thick moss-covered log, “when are you going to learn how to ride the bike without those training wheels,” “when you die,” she swung her leg over the bike and pushed it off through the trees, Damien and George in tow, Damien on the bike he left behind the same log, Damien on foot, the other two were soon far ahead of him, “I have to go guys,” George said, “ok, see you tomorrow” Damien said, he watched George’s form fade into the darkness and shifted his attention back to Lucy, she gave him a seductive smile, and pushed onward, she was the baddest girl in their sister school, wing eye-lined green eyes, dark hair falling off her perfectly symmetrical head in curls.
The moon was now full, just below the majority of bottom branches, bright orange eyes peeking out of halloween lanterns, and green light flickering from candles through green-stained hexagonal metal-glass containers hung on branches throughout the woods, casting a green-orange hue through the woods, Lucy’s tricycle squeaked through the night, Damien behind her on his two-wheeled bike, “I like your ass” he said, observing the soft expanse of her ass going up to a thin waist beneath the short black shirt she took out of her bag, she slowed down on her bike, pulling over next to a large tree, “oh yeah” “you wanna see it” “yeah” he said, blushing, she pulled the sides of her pants down, and stepped out of them, leaving an hourglass in a short black shirt and AF1s with ruffle socks alone with him in the dark woods, she walked to him and dragging her hands down his arms, putting his hands on her waist, she moved up to kiss him, he put one hand behind her neck, pulling at a chunk of the skin on the back of her waist with the other, ecstasy beginning to flow heavily through his body, a crack of twigs sounded behind her, she gasped and looked behind, his hands still connected to her, a pair of neutral appearing solid-orange circular eyes grew through the night toward them, they shifted through space up to them, a pair of sharp white teeth streaked with dark purple-black veins slowly coming out of its black face, a sharp black hand nearly imperceptible against the night reaching out and wrapping around her head, slamming it against the tree at a nearly imperceptible speed, leaving a bloody-bony splatter on the tree, and a body from the neck down on the ground.
The demon levitated backwards, “run” it said, Damien’s eyes widened in fear, turning to run directly away, he sprinted between trees with the demon shifting through space behind him, orange eye the only hint of its existence, each shift sending a cold wave of anxiety through him, a large dilapidated, wooden house came into view ahead, hope filled his eyes, he ran up the stairs, slamming his shoulder into the door, knocking it over and stumbling through into the house, he saw a door at the back and ran toward it, seeing a hallway to the right and a kitchen to the left he threw his bag into the kitchen and began to creep through the hallway on the right, going through an open door into a bedroom, he threw himself beneath the large ruffled blanket on the bed, next to a large teddy bear, lying flat, he heard a shift of wind near the door, and felt a darkness fall over the room, animalistic breathing sounded from the demon, Damien opened his eyes and saw two orange circles come over him, horrid breath seeping through the blanket, it took all his mental effort not to move, the eyes shifted up slightly and a sharp pain stung the bottom of his chin and top of his head.

When you need to cool off, your blood vessels open up, letting blood flow to your arms and legs so heat can escape through your skin.
Context: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SGHRz8wpj3E
Whether you’re planning your next vacation, or you just want to know how many layers you’ll need to put on in the morning, you probably check the weather forecast pretty often. But you should know, before you go out with that extra jacket, that the temperature might not be the best measure of what it actually feels like outside. Humidity is important, too, which is why you might sometimes think the forecasters must have been wrong, because it’s definitely about ten degrees hotter right now and you’re covered in sweaty grossness. Your body’s built-in thermostat likes to keep your internal temperature at a steady 37 degrees Celsius so that all of your enzymes can do what they’re supposed to do... you know … keeping you alive. That's the temperature they like. When you need to cool off, your blood vessels open up, letting blood flow to your arms and legs so heat can escape through your skin. Your sweat glands also start to produce moisture, which takes a bunch of heat with it when it evaporates.

Info from: https://tattle.life/wiki/lucy_letby_case_2/
This one is crazy too.
So, a little over a day after the twin died, Baby B had an apnea and brady. Recovered. Because LL had been involved with giving the baby antibiotics, they are claiming it was an air embolus.

A designated night-shift nurse was responsible for Child B. Shortly before midnight, the blood/oxygen levels had fallen to 75% and the Cpap nasal prongs were dislodged from Child B's nostrils. The nurse repositioned the prongs and the levels recovered. Just after midnight, Letby started a bag of liquid feed with Child B, with the nurse, through an IV line. At 12.16am Letby - while not Child B's designated nurse - took her blood gases. About 28 hours after her twin brother had died, at about 12.30am, Child B's alarm sounded and Letby had called the nurse to the child's incubator. Child B was not breathing. A crash call was put out at 12.33am, and resuscitation began. The nurse noted purple blotches and white patches all over Child B's body, and the heart rate had dropped.

Baby quickly recovered and had no further issues.
Dr. Evans, my least favorite doctor says the following:

Dr Dewi Evans concluded Child B was "subjected to form of sabotage" that night, the court hears. Another medical expert said an airway obstruction would cause a "sudden desaturation and reduction in heart-rate", but would not account for the "florid change in skin colour and perfusion noted at the time". The medical expert said a "relatively quick recovery" would "only be explained by a dose of air...deliberately administered in the bloodstream".

This makes no sense. This is not how air emboli resolve. You do not resolve an air embolus through PPV. Perfusion changes when babies are apneic/desaturating. They become all sorts of weird colors. I do not know if they noted the colors at the time or if it is the benefit of hindsight that they remembered it.
(side note, I hate when they call TPN "liquid feed". That makes me think enteral or going to the stomach, not IV)
There's really not much here, just that LL gave some antibiotics, baby had an ABD, and therefore, it was attempted murder????
I don't know if this is the weakest case, but it's at least in the running to be.

I started getting lumps at 13 ,one the size of a gold ball on my neck it was the first and it grew as time went on and 1 became many I've lost count of how many lymph nodes or lumps I have ,current day I'm 20m and have at least 4 on my head and ones been pushing my ear for years, slowly it's gonna harder and harder of hearing in my left ear ,the canal is smaller than it was but the don't know why .I get horrible sharp pains in my head that make me twitch or jerk my body at times ,when my body jerks my neck I feel the biggest lump almost pinch me inside? I have many on my feet and back making walking hurt at points ,lifting things being so painful got me fired from one of my jobs in the past ,recently I'm hungry but not gaining weight ,I'm 7 stone 7 pounds and feelings dizzy and tired most of the time but even if I ate before going to bed my stomach will hurt with how hungry I am threw the day like 4 times a day I also randomly vomit ,I threw up while brushing my teeth ,eating ,I just started gaging and it won't stop ,what I don't understand if why am I getting a sudden increase in amount of lymph nodes on me ,the pain they cause me and why am I so hungry, my stomach physically hurts only a few hours after I've eaten but I look really bad ,pale ,shake alot ,random hot and cold flushes ,random passing out or my view going black or staticy for up to 20 mins. I've been scared I have brain cancer for years but doctors never took me seriously because when I noticed my left ear was being pushed my dad told my doctor I listen to music too loud ,the lumps just kept growing and no one cared ,I kept going to the doctors, begged to be looked at to where they did and sonogram on my head and told me my skull was in the way and told me "it's cancer but not cancerous " and refused to ever explain to me or my gp what that sentence even means .recently my brain has felt wet ,like it feels like I'm sweating because I can feel the inside of my head drip with sonething, when I feel this I get very light headed and feel a horrible pressure in my head sometimes I think there's something pushing on my brain and its some of the most painful things I've been through, I can't live lien this please tell me what I can say to my doctor to prove I Nedd help I feel like I've been dying slowly for years now and because I'm young everyone assumes I'm faking it when I've been I'm pain so long, I also have a weird skin patterning that a new doctor went what is that rash with wide eyes, I told her it was vitiligo according to my doctor but I no longer have a clue ,it can be peeled off but the colour under that normally very hard and flakey skin is still a different colour to the rest of my skin ,it's on my neck ,face ,back and arms ,when i was a kid I had one brownie orange mark then one year I was terrified of it reaching my face but I got over it when I stop got getting asked if I had a deiase. On top of all this I'm covered in holes, scabs that don't heal right, 1 hole turns into 3 by day 3 I think impetigo (not good at spelling but im pa ty go )